Author: Denigoddess2001
Addy:
Date: 02/17/02

Disclaimer: I do not own Gargoyles. They belong to Disney. The poem is all MINE!
This is Dominique's answer to MacBeth's poem, "TEMPTED."

This is dedicated to one with the heart of an angel and the ferocity of a dragon.

Restraint

The moon is high and the hour is late
Under the cover of darkness I patiently wait.
I hide behind smiles and a dispassionate veneer
And I think of the one that my heart holds so dear.

His touch is much like heaven kissing through silk
as he strokes his talons along my back
How my heart has he won? Now I come undone
And I ask, "How do I know if he is the one?"

"Is he but infatuation, is this a trick of the fates?
Or is he my completion? Is he my mate?"
We lose ourselves in a kiss as we entwine tail and wing
Our hearts find true joy as in moonlight we sing.

Our voices mingle as if we make love
We find harmony in heart in the dark skies above
Yet, so little is certain under a Mating Moon
Is it all an illusion, is all just too soon?

The life that I know is uncertain each day.
I secretly question whether to leave or to stay.
His wings are my haven, his voice soothes my pain
And in his arms my strength I slowly regain.

My life is so much brighter that it was once before
My Archangel has saved me and given me more
That a heart such as mine has ever seen or known
I'm no longer an island and I'm no longer alone.

I think of leaving the old life behind
A different time, a different age, a different heart and mind.
Do I dare look to the future in the eyes of this man?
Do I leave all that I know, my home and my clan?

Do I venture forth into a vast new unknown?
To share in a love like heart has never known?
I ruthlessly suppress my fear and my pride
And I long to ask to have us by each other's side.

Yet, his honor demands that we no longer touch
I need to feel his taste and his kiss. I need it so much
That my soul dies as he tells me that we must abstain
I wonder if admonition always comes with such pain.

He kisses me one night and makes me feel whole.
Then with his censure he tears apart my soul.
Was I just passing folly or an amusing dream?
To this man was it much less than it seemed.

I cloak wings about me as I gather my pride.
Does he know his rebuke has shattered my heart inside?
The shards cut at my heart as I long to scream "WHY?"
I turn tail and leave. He will NOT see me cry!

Yet, behind closed doors, I let go of the lie than runs so deep
I let the tears fall and I silently weep.
I weep because I think that I am not what he needs.
How deep is rejection when in kindness it feeds.

I am alone once again in my pain and my fear
I no longer have the strength of when he was near.
I abide in his honor and I do my best
Not to think of his touch or his sweetest caress.

My anger has passed in the flare of a wing
As his tears well in his eyes at this terrible thing.
Honor demands that he be noble in thought and in deed
Until all is resolved and I have the courage to lead.

My heart slowly breaks at thought of his pain
and now I understand why now he says we must refrain
To abandon his character would make him less than the man
that my heart knows, in truth, brings joy to all that I am.

How can I remove the torture I see in his eyes?
Do I tell him the truth or tell him sweet lies?
I chose to give him the honor that he assuredly deserves
I let forth my heart and let my true thoughts be heard.

I feel his arms about me and once more I know bliss
I find myself longing for his touch and his sweet, tender kiss.
All that he strides for I must so admire
And I berate myself for being a fool with desire.

He reaches for a higher integrity that I have yet to know.
He asks that I aspire to reach for it also.
I question my heart and I find it to be true
If he asks how I can, I will tell him, "I love you."

In his presence I cause myself to abate
From thoughts of him inside me, I silently wait.
He has taught me that to love there can be so much more
That a few stolen kisses on the living room floor.

He delights my mind and refreshes my soul
My heart comes together and I am once again, whole.
Yet, I realize the wisdom in why we must wait.
I must make some decisions and reevaluate.

Do I step toward the future that beckons with this man?
Or do I remain unhappy and uncertain where I now am?
I look for signs for an answer to help me make this choice
I hope it takes form and that it finds a strong voice.

Archangel, though they may not be said and remain forever unheard
Know from my abstention and from my unspoken words
That what grows between us is what legends are made of
More primal than lust, more pristine than love.

With compassion and wisdom, honor and strength
He walks his path well and he goes to such lengths
To assure me that his heart is strident and true
And when all is right in the world we'll say, "I love you."


-Fini