I was nervous beyond belief. My hands shook, spilling my latte over the sides of the cup. It was seven a.m. and I was sitting in the corner of the coffee shop, waiting for someone unknown man that someone swore had had a picture of me. Caffeine and no sleep was not a good combination for me, but I'd been so anxious about this morning that I couldn't sleep. I kept running it over and over in my head, wondering what I was going to say to him when I met him. Should I just go up to him and ask "Do you know me?" Or should I ask why he had a picture of me?
Then again, there was always the chance that it hadn't been me in the picture and he had no idea I existed. I knew better then to get my hopes up, but I couldn't help it. This could be the big break that I was waiting for. The key to everything, the key that would give me my life back. Was this man the missing puzzle piece?
I tapped my fingers on my cup, staring at the door, willing him to come in. What if he didn't come? I stopped, suddenly more afraid that he wouldn't come in at all, then if he just didn't know me. If he didn't come back to the shop, I would never know. And I would spend the rest of my days obsessing about it, wondering if he had been the key to everything. I was terrified, now.
I stared at the door, I don't know how many minutes passed. The door started to open and my breath caught in my throat, my shoulder tensed up, and I raised my body from my slouched position, eagerly waiting to see him.. But it was only a woman with her kid, coming in for coffee. I deflated, my hopes dying. He wasn't going to come. Already, two hours had past. Trembling, I grabbed my coat, knowing that if I waited here any longer I would go crazy. Trashing my latte, I pulled the coat over my shoulders and walked out.
And...deja vu. A guy walked in, his shoulder hitting mine. I jerked around to yell at him, when I stopped, staring at him face. He was beautiful. It wasn't the word normally used for guys, but it fit him. His skin was flawless, copper hair fell over his forehead. He completely filled out his black t-shirt. I gaped at him. He shook his head, it seemed like he was refusing to look at me, but he had stopped right next to me.
"No." I heard him mutter, his teeth grit together. But eventually, he slowly turned towards me. I gasped as his amber eyes met mine. And fell into darkness.
He leaned over me on my bed, his lips slowly touching mine. It was intoxicating, his breath mingling with mine, his cool, hard lips pressing mine. He pulled back. I knew his face.
"Edward." I whispered.
I wasn't going to look. I knew that I was crazy, and the first step of preventing it, was not giving in to my delusions. I could see the brown hair of the girl standing next to me, the exact shade of Bella's hair. The scent of her drifted to my nostrils, filling me. I clenched my teeth and shut my eyes. There was no way that it was Bella. I knew it wasn't Bella. But I had to look.
I turned, facing what I knew would hold disappointment. And froze. What the...
Bella collapsed. Terrified, I caught her, my eyes wide, my body trembling with shock. Bella? How did she find me? Why was she in Dawn? And more importantly, what made her collapse? The shock and disgust at seeing me? "Bella." I whispered, cradling her against my chest, desperately searching for what was wrong with her.
She opened her eyes for a moment, looked at my face. And whispered "Edward" before passing out once again in my arms. I stared at her until the noise surrounding us disturbed me. I jerked my head up to see a crowd of people around us, asking if she was all right. I brushed them off, saying something about dehydration and taking her home. I spoke with enough authority that no one questioned that I was someone with that right to take her. I carried her to my apartment, a few blocks away.
I fought the questions in my head as I lay her on my bed and wait for her to regain consciousness. What the hell was she doing here? What was wrong with her? I grit my teeth, debating quickly whether I should grab my stuff and leave. Run as far away as I could to save her. But staring down at her beautiful face, I knew that I couldn't. I had given her up once, I couldn't do it again. "God, Bella," I breathed. I couldn't stop looking at her. Her eyes were sunken in farther than they used to. She looked tired, worn, and pale. But that couldn't probably be attributed to whatever was ailing her now.
I frowned, once again searching her for an obvious sign of what was wrong. I knew that when someone fell unconscious, it could last for up to a half an hour before it became dangerous, and only around 10 minutes had passed. But I was worried. So worried that I contemplated calling Carlisle, who I hadn't spoken to in months. Five minutes, I decided, still gazing at her face, drinking in the sight. If she wasn't aware in 5 minutes, I would call Carlisle.
Why was she here? That anguished thought kept running through my head. Had she come to tell me how much she hated me? Had she been heartbroken and followed me? Both scenarios made my heart, that couldn't beat, clench. I'd prayed she'd get over me, after I'd left. But I'd also prayed that she wouldn't hate me. That she'd somehow understand. Watching her, I willed to her awaken. I wanted to see those beautiful brown eyes looking at me, even if they were full of hatred.
The most important question after what was wrong with her, was what was I going to do? I'd walked away, but I knew that I didn't have the altruistic nature that would allow me to be that selfless once again. I couldn't do what I'd done to either of us again. If we were going to part ways, then this time it would be on Bella's terms. I could never walk away from her again, unless she asked. If she asked, when she asked, it would destroy me. But that was okay. If it was what she needed, I would do it.
Her eyes opened as my determination to do what she wanted raged within me. Her chocolate eyes looked directly at me, confusion carved obviously in them. I waited. Waited for her to scream at me, waited for her to cry. God, I hoped she didn't cry. I expected a number of things to happen. What I didn't expect was what actually happened.
I never expected for her to stare up at me with those exquisite eyes and ask. "Do you know me? Do I know you?"
I'm sorry about the length and the wait. I will hopefully have a computer and internet access in the next one or two months. But until then, do I at least get some love for uploading this?