A/N: Hi again to: Jorlem, Drakensis, Paladindythe, yesilmavi, Rob Kelk, Florin, Stephen Mann, Foxboy, Necratoid, LilFluff, Bob Schroeck, sweno, blackaeronaut, Acyl, Manytales00, nocarename, Timote, werehawk.

Okay, I overdid the last chapter. Sorry.

I've recently done a crossover with Shaun Garin, in his fic Power Rangers Decade. Everything that happens after the giant marshamallwow man take palce in Shaun's fic. The events of that chapter are canon to this fic. How else was I going to stick Power Rangers into this thing? :-p Check it out, it's great!

Onemanga is shutting down! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! How will I follow Negima NOW? My manga! My preccccciiiious manga! Any recommendations for replacement sites? I am terrified I won't be able to keep up with Negima.

Anyway, crack at Maximum, ecchi at greater than normal levels. Review, please? TvTrope it, dattebayo!


Takamachi Nanoha of 2814

by Shadow Crystal Mage

Chapter 11: The Linker Cores War, Part 5: All Hell Breaks Loose or 'Vita-chan's Ero-Ero Adventures!'

Disclaimer: I own none of the characters in this story. If I did… well, this would all be canon. WARNING: MAY CAUSE HEAD EXPLOSION!


If Nanoha knew how to curse, she would have. As it was, she was improvising.

"Poot," she said vehemently as Tomoyo and Sakura's friend, Lee Syaoran, was fussed over by doctors. Healers? Medi-mages? She really needed to learn the terminology. She turned to the Amy. "Will he be all right?"

Amy nodded, face distressed. "He should be fine. His Linker Core is different again, but it seems to be recovering just fine. It should be back to normal in about a few days."

Nanoha pursed her lips, frowning. "Bardiche and Raging Heart aren't ready yet?"

Amy shook her head. "Bardiche will be done soon, but between the– what did your ring call it? Willfire Intermix Lens?– the building of the custom piece and the need to reinforce Raging Heart's structure, it might be a while. Even then the reinforcement won't be complete, and Raging Heart might not be able to completely stand up to the use of the new systems."

"Can you show me what kind of reinforcement is needed?" Nanoha asked. "Perhaps Ring-chan and I can think of something."

Amy frowned, but nodded. "I'll send you the relevant data."

Nanoha smiled thankfully, before slumping. "This is getting out of hand. I think their original intention was to attack Sakura-chan for her Linker Core. I… I think these people have marked everyone who came to my rescue. After all, they're among the most powerful magic users in Japan. And their linker cores seem compatible enough. I think… I think they're all in danger. These people… they'll be after them soon. I need to warn them! I need to tell them they're targets too! Before this happens again! Amy-chan, I need to get to back Earth, NOW!"

Amy frowned. "It will take some time. The transporters aren't as fast as the Asura, and–"

"Show me what I need to know to navigate this 'Dimensional Sea'," Nanoha said, determined. "I should have asked you this a long time ago. Show me what reference points you use, measurements, that sort of thing. And I'll show you a Green Lantern is faster than anything man can build. I'll get us home. Believe it."

Amy did. "Let me get you those papers."


Saotome Haruna was awakened by a tapping at her window. She opened it groggily, part of her hoping this wasn't Evangeline in the mood for a quick nibble or something. The faint green glow warned her.

Green Lantern floated outside her window, the little girl's face grimmer than she'd ever seen. "Haruna-san," she said softly. "I heard about your idea for a United Magical Girls Association of Japan. How quickly could you ptoperly organize it if I put you into contact with all the ones I know?"

"W-wha?" Haruna said, adjusting her glasses blearily.

"I think the same people who attacked me and injured Negi-chan and Sailor Moon-sama are targeting the people that arrived to help me, Haruna-san," Green Lantern said. "They're targeting people with magic, the stronger the better."

Haruna felt like she'd been splashed with cold water as she turned to look at the slumbering forms of Nodoka and Yue. Her face set in grim mask. People with magic… that was most of the people she knew, possibly even herself if her having an Artifact meant anything. It certainly meant Konoka and Asuna.

She turned to Green Lantern, expression stony. Negi was a good teacher by example. No one would hurt her friends. "Come back in the morning," she said, drawing out her card. "I should have something by then."

It would be a long night, she thought as Green Lantern left, and she began to draw. But she was used to it. This was just another deadline. And she never missed a deadline. None of the important ones, at any rate.


Illya opened her window without opening her own eyes as Kuro slept blissfully on the bed they were forced to share. Lucky bitch, she thought. Aloud, she said, "It's the middle of the night! You better have a damned good reason for waking me up, or I swear I'm going Maximal Schneiden on your ass."

"Illya-san," a voice said, familiar but a bit hard to place.

llya reluctantly opened one eye. She mostly saw a blur of green. "Green Lantern-chan?"

"Illya, I think you and your friends might be in danger," Green Lantern said. Illya tried to wake up further. "And I have a proposition for you…"


"An official Magical Girls' association?" Sailor Mercury said, frowning at Green Lantern through the Mercury computer's screen. "Like what that girl with the sketchpad suggested?"

Green Lantern nodded. "I know it's our nature to be independent and a bit argumentative, but it's also our nature to lay aside minor differences when it comes to truly dangerous threats. And after such threats are vanquished, we usually stay more amendable to each other. I'd like to create more… not exactly unity, but more communication between all of us. After all, the Senshi have a lot of experience dealing with the most diverse kinds of enemies, Ala Alba has varied field specialists beyond just elemental affinities and battlefield skills, I have flexibility and power… I'm not saying we make up a schedule to patrol Japan against ALL threats, but this way if a team is having difficulty, they can at the very least be put in contact with someone who can advice then, to some degree. And… the people who attacked Sailor Moon, Negi-chan and myself are still out there. And I've received a report that indicates they're targeting magical girls to drain for power. I believe your group is familiar with that kind of M.O.?"

"Just a little," Sailor Mercury said, smiling slightly. "Magical girls?"

"This afternoon, a boy in Tomoeda with a degree of magical ability and who was friends with that masked girl– the one whose staff was pink with a gold star?– was attacked by the same people," Green Lantern said grimly. "He's stable, but this won't be the last. These people… they're collecting energy for something call the 'Book Of Darkness', Sailor Mercury. My friends here say that once it's complete, destruction follows."

Sailor Mercury sighed. "Obviously. Something with a name like 'Book of Darkness' isn't exactly made for bringing joy to the empty lives of wheelchair-ridden little girls."

Somewhere, Hayate sneezed in her sleep.

"I'll have to discuss it with the others, but I'm definitely in," Sailor Mercury continued. "And I can tentatively say the others are likely to be too."

"Thank you," Green Lantern said, bowing onscreen. "I'm having Haruna– the girl with the sketch pad– take charge of organizing the networking."

Sailor Mercury straightened, mildly alarmed. "Her?-! But…! She…!"

"I know, I've heard about how she tried to con everyone, but she does genuinely have a stake in this," Green Lantern said placatingly. "Many of her closest friends have magical abilities to one degree, and she's close friends with Negi-chan. I know she's a bit… strange, but she and her friends have excellent organization and logistics abilities, and from what I've heard, her sketchpad is possibly equal and in some fields able to surpass my ring. But I was actually going to ask you if you and their computer specialist handle the actual networking and communications. Haruna's more a ring-master than an organizer. She'll get this going, I'm sure, but getting anything to work…"

"I'm on it," Sailor Mercury said. "Who am I supposed to contact?"

"I don't know her real name– I'm not sure I've met her– but Haruna says their computer specialist is known as– well, one of the names they're known as– The Calculator."


"No! We're running out of time!

"It won't stop regenerating!"

"Freezing it isn't enough!"

"Hit it with everything we've got! More Dakka!"

"I'm out of ordinance! I knew I should have put in more of the nukes!"

"No! We're so close! My Berserker will have JUSTICE!"

"We need more time!"


"NO! Don't you dare!"

"As you all say, we need more time…"

"NO! I'm ordering you, NO!"

"Good bye…"

"Stop her!"

"Time… Stop…"


Her eyes snapped open, the cry ringing in her ears amidst the sounds of a helicopter as her hand reached forward, towards the ceiling, trying to grasp an ephemeral ghost that was already gone. Shuddering, she let her hand drop to her covers, pulling the blanket tight around her.

"Ordinance…" she muttered to herself. "What's… ordinance?"

It took her some time to get back to sleep…


Nanoha had a boring day. Get up, admire how saccharinely close her family was, stop a few petty crimes, go to school, visit with her friends, return home, drink from a shaking… glass… of… water…?

"Hey, what is that anyhow?" asked Miyuki as everyone stared out the windows of the Midoriya.

"It's… a… giant marshmallow man?" said Shinobu in an uncertain voice.

What happened next was several crazy days with 'Power Rangers' and some girl named Vivio. Nanoha's only consolation was that hearing voices in her head at any point was not part of it.


"Meh…" Nanoha sighed, laying her head down on her deck, letting the cool wood press against her forehead. "I hate giant monsters…"

"I hate pizza…" Yuuno agreed, curled up in his basket in ferret form.

Nanoha moaned, turning her head to one side. Getting everything rebuilt after what people were calling the 'Uminari Hundred Minute Hundred Monster War' had been a… pooty time. Though the Rangers had assured her that the 'Morphing Grid's' power– or, as Ring-chan vehemently insisted on calling it, a psycho-reactive plasmic energy that was definitely not magic!– would ensure that everyone in the immediate area of the battle would be 'magically' evacuated in the nick of time, Green Lantern's searches had found a few dozen people buried in the rubble. Thankfully, there didn't seem to be any deaths in this incident, something she was very reluctant to assign to any sort of higher power. Or magical one, for that matter.

Not that it hadn't been fun. She and Vivio-chan had become good friends, and she dearly wished to meet the girl again in the future. The older Chrono and older Yuuno that had come with her had said it might be possible some day, whether by another freak accident conveniently sending them her way– their words, not hers– or as some sort of contrived last-minute cavalry that providence would assemble in a future hour of need– again, their words. Or perhaps it would be the other way around, with her having the accident or needing the cavalry.

The Chrono she knew had seemed very motivated by his older self, as did Amy for some reason. Even the captain had been enthused by their arrival, spending long hours with the older Yuuno in her room, apparently having fascinating– Lindy's word, not hers– discussions about law enforcement as practiced by the TSAB and the other's Space Patrol Delta. It must certainly be enthusiastic discussions, because Yuuno always came out of the room sweating and a bit red. This seemed to annoy the Chronos a lot. Well, she supposed Chrono would never stop being a mama's boy…

Sighing, Nanoha pushed herself up. She had a schedule to keep, after all. "Yuuno-kun, can you spot me?" she said, regaining some of her old energy as she made herself comfortable on her chair. Yuuno made a non-comittal sound, but straightened up turning to watch Nanoha.

Nanoha held out her hands. "Lyrical Magical," she intoned, and a pink point of light manifested itself. It was weaker than what she'd been able to make before she was attacked, which, granted, had been no Divine Shooter. It had been bought to her attention that maybe it would be a good idea to work on her magic, on the basis she might need to use it without Raging Heart to help. Before she she'd been attacked, small Divine Shooters had been her limit, and maybe a shield, though she wasn't sure how good that latter had been, just that she could make it. Using her own ring against her own shields hadn't been a hot idea: the shields kept breaking under her will.

Frowning, she began her exercises…


Being magically drained, Lee Syaoran concluded, was a bitch.

He had chest pains in places he didn't know were there, his magic-sense as currently all skewed out of whack, he had occasional headaches which apparently stemmed from the fact his brain and his damaged 'Linker Core'– honestly, it sounded like some kind of stupid Harry Potter fandumb body part!– were messing with each other, and to top it all off, when he'd finally gotten back from wherever the space-wizards had taken him Sakura had given him a hug, gushing about how brave he'd been to fight off the bad people like that, leading to Daidouji giving him the Kiss of Death.

It had definitely been the Kiss of Death. She'd given it right after he'd broken the 'Thou Shall Not Touch Sakura-chan Intimately' rule– never mind she'd touched him– kissing right on the edge of his cheek, practically on his mouth, and she'd said, "You're very brave, Lee-kun," with that smile of hers. It had to be a Kiss of Death, right? He wondered which of her on-call-killers would be doing the deed. Cousin Sandra? Oh, please don't let it be her, family connections to her were messed up enough without that!

Tomoyo rolled her eyes as Lee seemed insistent on giving himself an ulcer or heart attack before he was in his teens. Honestly, she'd been absolutely sincere in her congratulations! Though she had to admit, it was fun watching him squirm and knowing it was because of something she'd done…


"And where do you think you're going, young lady?"

Negi groaned and wondered if the universe was run by some kind of sicko who liked humiliating him. "Asuna!" he cried, turning to face the grinning Magic Canceller. "Stop calling me that! I'm just going to give Doe-san her extra lessons!"

"Hmm…" Asuna said, nodding. "Very responsible and teacherly of you."

Negi nodded in agreement.

"So you won't be needing that practice wand of Konoka's you filched and stuck down your sock, right?"

Negi pouted at her. "It's my wand…" he muttered, pulling it out awkwardly from under the slacks– a dark navy blue that was softer than he'd have preferred– and out of the baggy socks he'd been forced to wear since they'd stolen his wardrobe. At least it wasn't the yellow sundress, though.

Asuna took from his sullen grasp. "No magical Boom Boom for you, Negi-chan," she chirped, though the protectiveness in her eyes was nothing to laugh at. Run from maybe, but not laugh at.

Negi sighed, deflating. "I've been feeling much better, so I thought…" he muttered.

Asuna's expression softened, and she tossed the wand on a nearby table as she stepped forward to ruffle her partner's hair and give him a one armed, totally-platonic-yup-nothing-romantic-about-this hug. "Hey, don't you go all emo about this again. Seriously, this is a serious injury that no one we know has ever encountered before. Follow the doctor's orders and take it slow, okay? What would your legions of adoring subjects say when they hear the great Prince of Ostia lost his magic because he couldn't tone it down for a few days? Given that mess in Uminari, we all deserve a break. If you really feel like worrying about something, Haruna's still on her Mistress of Giant Monsters kick, between coordinating this Magical Girl Association thing with Chisame and Sailor Mercury-sama. The Hundred War at least got them that test-run they wanted, and they've been working on kinks since."

Negi smiled, possessive pride on his features. The communication's network his students had set up had been a resounding success, and he could help but be proud of them. Who'd have thought that love-crazy Haruna of all people would be able to actually rally together such a diverse group of distant people and get them to work together? He tried not to think about how her methods would be equally effective for rallying villains bent on world domination.

"But you don't need to worry too much, since those Ranger people made sure everyone they talked to knew Haruna was clocking high on the kilonazi scale," Asuna added as if hearing his thoughts.

That brought back some thing to recent memory. "Asuna, are you all right?" he said, looking up at her worriedly. "Kuro did drain you a lot…"

Asuna blushed at the memory of the perverted girl. "She needed the energy for those swords and arrows she makes. Zedd had a lot of minions up there, and not all of them could be Exorcised." She scowled as if this was a personal affront.

"Still…" Negi said.

"Oh, don't worry, Negi," she said. "She just emptied out the gas tank, not took a hammer to the engine. I'm fine. Now get going, you don't want to be late for your lesson with Doe-san."

Negi nodded, picking up his books from the table and turning for the door.

"And Negi…" Asuna said.

Negi paused. "Yes?"

"Leave the wand."



Bruce Wayne sighed. He gave the papers in front of him a glare that should have not only incinerated it, but put the ashes in an environmentally friendly receptacle and swept the floor. Giant robots. Magical girls. Space-wizards at one point, it seemed. Lots and lots of giant monsters. Some sort of green, light-based weapon that had destroyed– he felt a headache pulsing– a big-even-by-Tokyo-standards marshmallow man straight out of that old movie.

He was coming to loathe Uminari. Why hadn't he put their corporate headquarters in Tokyo like everyone else again? Oh right, the giant monsters, magical girls, occasional energy-draining infiltration for an extra-dimensional magical invasion, and general weirdness. That was why they only had the public relations and marketing departments there. Everything else were in the Uminari and Fuyuki offices.

Bruce sighed, leaning back and rubbing his temples. The sun would be setting soon. Then it would be time to get changed to his real work clothes, see if Daidouji was serious about all those killers being just there for guard duty, check out this absurd Church she'd apparently had registered– First Church of the Cherry Blossom? Seriously?– maybe take the time to see the sights, put the fear of HIM into the local lowlifes, stay the heck away from the local 'Magical Girls', investigate Mahora Academy…

Bruce felt a chill run through him at the thought, and looked up at the universe suspiciously. He cautiously repeated the last thought. Investigate Mahora Academy….

Another chill ran through him.

"All right, message received, intuition says don't go near the place," he muttered.

Sighing, he bent back over his paperwork. He needed to get it done before he went flying off. Responsibility and all that…


Kusanagi Makoto, pilot of Hammersuit Zero-X, stared hungrily at the giant robots, the 'Zords', as Green Lantern had said they were called in her oh-so-prompt and concise reports, fingers twitching.

"Makoto, give it up," Boss Bishonen said. "They're never going to approve the budget for that!"

"Maybe we can hide it in the repair budget…" she muttered.

"I'm already using that to hide my hair gel costs."

"You hair is on fire."

"Exactly. Napalm. Nothing like it for getting that disco-inferno look."


"Illya… wake up…"

"Hmm… oni-chan…"

Smooch! With Tongue!

"Illya…" Blush.

"Ah! Miyu! I'm–"

"Yeah, you're sorry, MIYU, COME 'ERE!"

Smooch! With Lots Of Tongue! Practically Mouth Rape!


Business as usual for team loli…


Hayate was sniffing Vita's panties. This was a lot worse than it sounded, since Vita was still wearing them.

Really, it was all Vita's fault, squirming around so much when she slept that she ended up kicking off her bottoms and jerking Hayate awake. The brunette snickered at the green pedobear panties her knight was wearing. And to think Vita had chosen those herself. She leaned in again, taking a whiff and giggled.

"Eh…? AH! Hayate, w-what are you doing!-?" Vita exclaimed, barely managing to not kick Hayate in the face out of reflex. That doing so was also becoming a reflex was something she didn't dwell on.

Hayate giggled at her flustered Knight. "Oh, I was just thinking these might be a bit too tight for you. See, they're all wet because they were too tight and made you all sweat and squirmy last night."

Vita went as red as her knight armor, tucking her legs shut as Hayate laughed pleasantly. That's it, Vita resolved. First chance we get, we're taking her off this nut-rock and trying to convince her it was all just a dream!


There was a knock on the door to the Headmaster's office.

"Come in," the old man said.

Green Lantern pushed open the door, in green and black instead of her more usual green and white. Oh, sure her ring could do white fabrics as well, but she often felt that black was as much part of Corps colors as green was. "Ready to go, Negi-chan?" she asked.

Negi twitched slightly, but kept a pleasant smile on his face as he nodded. "Ready, Green Lantern-san. The Headmaster's arranged to have someone take care of my classes this morning while I have my checkup."

Green Lantern nodded happily in approval. "Education is important!" she agreed. "We don't have time to pick up Eternal Sailor Moon-sama, since she apparently has school. We've set up her checkup for this weekend."

Negi nodded. Finally he'd know how long before he could use magic again. Then maybe he could use it to track down the rest of his clothes. The slacks and blouse he was wearing, while serviceable enough for his peace of mind, were among the last in a slowly disappearing group of passably masculine clothes. About 80 percent of his closet space now contained sundresses, skirts from mini- on up, tube tops and, courtesy of Evangeline, several extremely Gothic Lolita outfits, complete with matching hats, umbrellas and purses. Never let it be said that the Dark Evangel wasn't generous in her gifts when trying to break someone's mind to teeny tiny pieces.

At this rate, Negi wouldn't have anything to wear to class tomorrow!


"Vita! What's taking you so long!" Signum asked. She wanted her bath, DARN IT!

"Uh… AH… in a minute!"

Signum rolled her eyes. "Take your time."

Grumbling ,the leader of the Wolkenritter– technically field leader, since, of course, Hayate was NUMBER 1!– hefted the basket containing all her bathing stuff. It was pretty heavy, what with, among other things, her 7 different shampoos, 4 different conditioners, 11 soaps, 23 bath salts, 5 kinds of bubble bath, her radio, a selection of rubber duckies, a little inflatable ring for her Hayate UFO Catcher doll, the latest Stephanie Meyer books, a lighter, several different kinds of bladed mutilation instruments, her wind-up Zoids, inflatable pillows, sliced cucumbers, a small salad, some pocky, the latest Light Novel she was following, some cupcakes and cookies, the collected works of the Marquis de Sade, her digital camera and a selection of fluffy towels and slippers in the shape of various animals. Since this was Signum, the animals all had their entrails coming out.

Signum had heard of quality and quantity. For her baths, she had decided, she would have both.

Putting the basket down on the sofa, she sat back a moment, contemplating the last few days. Because of… disruptions– her ears hurt in remembered agony at listening to Vita swear about all the sudden explosions and giant monster and robots. They still didn't know what had caused that blinding green light, just that hadn't been magic– they hadn't been able to continue their plan to harvest more Linker Cores. Heck, they hadn't even dared going out to scout, staying home to make sure it didn't get stepped on with Hayate inside it while Vita tried to convince Hayate– quite unsuccessfully– that Gotham City seemed a nice, peaceful place to live.

Credit where credit was due, that Green Lantern girl certainly was able to keep Uminari safe for Hayate. Though Signum had to wonder how she was flying after having her Linker Core taken. Did she have anything to do with the burst of green light? No, it must have been the other boy, the one who had such good defensive spells. He certainly must have such power as that. She wondered how the young, trim, taught mage, with the nicely lean body, in that tight, formfitting green and black uniform with the buckles and the dog collar on it…

Signum firmly reminded herself it was bad form to embellish recollections of an enemy when considering for future combat situations. There was a possibility they'd run into them again in future, after all. Actually, it was more of a certainty. True, the TSAB hadn't interfered with their operation the day before that giant white fluffy creature made of sucrose products had suddenly appeared and been blown to fluff , but given the ridiculous difficulty of the ensuing encounter, that was probably the best thing that could have happened to them.

Seriously, 'very few mages coming from Earth' her perfectly toned ass! Those people had been a nightmare, considering most of them had used chemically-propelled mass-based weaponry, and there had only been one magic user of any sort to offer resistance. Vita had to be mistaken about the source of the electrical attacks from the girl's blades. The girl hadn't had a Linker Core to even worth mentioning, how could she have possibly created electricity, one of the hardest elements to master? Really, the girl couldn't be as bad as all that. After all, she had looked barely ten, her features too soft to have undergone any sort of combat training to stand up to one of the Belkans.

For a brief moment, Signum got the weird feeling the universe was laughing at her. She fiddled with the lampshade next to her, sighing impatiently as she waited for Vita to finish. They'd be trying for more Linker Cores today, and it would be best they did it early so Hayate wouldn't worry if they were gone. And it would be the first combat field-test of Shamal's new creations, and while everyone was too nice to say it, they all kind of wished there'd been a better means of testing.

The door finally opened, and Vita stepped out, towel inexpertly wrapped around her and nearly slipping off as it was, making Signum's fingers itch to show the girl how to do it right. Such a lack of respect for baths! Blasphemous!

Signum blinked, and realized the bath was empty. She grabbed her basket, hauling the thing to the bathroom so fast she should have left a big cloud of dust for some hapless coyote to crash into. The door clicked shut with finality.

Zafira and Shamal, who had been there all along, looked at each other. "See?" the familiar said. "Told you it was a good idea to wake up early to use the bathroom before those two."

Shamal sighed. "At least Signum cleans up after herself. Though destroying a book a bath is pretty wasteful…"


Alisa looked at Nanoha and Fate's empty chairs and sighed. "You know, it's getting pretty suspicious, the way those two keep disappearing like this," she muttered sideways towards Suzuka.

Suzuka nodded sagely. "Do you think they're off someone having wild hot underaged loli sex?" she asked.

Alisa blushed. "Suzuka! Where do you get such things?-!"

"My cousin Tomoyo," Suzuka said. "And your cousin Ayaka. You really should come back to Ladies' Tea Day, Alisa-chan."

"I'll protect my sanity from the crazy lolicons and shotacons instead, no offense, Suzuka-chan" Alisa muttered.


Meanwhile, Nanoha and her amazing friends were hurtling through the boringly scenic Dimensional Sea!

"–bang, chitty bang-bang, Chitty-chitty Bang-bang, we love you!" Nanoha, Fate, Arf and Negi all sang, bopping their heads along to the tune as Nanoha made cheerful but not really important wild steering gestures with the steering wheel.

Yuuno, seated at the back of the glowing green open-topped car with the fold-out cloth wings and levitation propellers, just sighed and tried to get back to reading his book. At least it wasn't from Spongebob…


Tsukino Usagi was lazy-happy.

While the others had needed to deal with those giant monsters a few days ago– while wished she could go, really she did, but still, giant monsters, and some of them had had tentacles– she'd cooled her heels, watching it all from TV and knowing with absolute confidence her friends would be able to pull through. She had faith in them, after all.

Besides, now that Setsuna was cut off from the bubbly, she'd been quite aggressive in the battlefield lately, such that Makoto and Haruka were almost feeling insecure. Though, as Michiru had glowing commented next to an equally glowing Haruka, this wasn't such a bad thing. Makoto had just mumbled something with 'sempai' in it and proceeded to murder her ice-cream like it had killed off her entire family with an army of demons.

That had been a while ago, before Ami's computer had rung warning of– Usagi sighed in slothful joy– something or other she wouldn't have to go deal with. The others had quickly left to fight the forces of evil, leaving her behind.

She ate her own ice-cream, savoring the taste of the confection. Ah, bliss.

It was pure, uncivilized joy, ice-cream. She wasn't sure who had had the bright idea to combine it with chocolate, but she had long ago firmly resolved to try and bring them back to life as soon as she was sure her control of the Ginzoushou wouldn't turn him into some kind of heart-eating super-powered space-zombie.

Somewhere, Nekron sneezed. It was DISGUSTING!

She was so busy savoring the sweet, milky, sticky, totally-not-Freudian-at-all orgasmic bliss of her ice-cream that she completely missed the girl who plopped down on the bench in front of her.

Finally, Usagi finished off her frozen, sweet, milky, sticky, totally-not-Freudian-at-all orgasmic bliss, sighing happily as she put down the bowl and spoon and contemplating getting another one. The notion would solidify in a few minutes, but right now it was just a nebulous happy thought as she lay back on her booth.

Vita smiled at her from across the table, a scarily-thick book next to her on the seat. "Hey," the little knight said, and Usagi's blood turned to liquid nitrogen in her veins. "Damn, blondie, you can really put it away. Oh, and you have some on your cheek." The knight tossed Usagi a tissue, who caught it dazedly and proceeded to dab at her face. "No, a little to the left… there, you got it all. Man, you're a hard girl to find. I wouldn't have found you at all if I hadn't looked at the window and seem your hair. I'd have introduced myself sooner, but you looked like you were really enjoying yourself there. How are you… Sailor Moon."

Usagi's blood dropped to a temperature usually reserved for absolute entropy.

"I'd just like to say, I'm a big admirer of your work," Vita said in the ensuing silence. "I hear you and your girls have put up with a lot of crap protecting this loony bin. I can respect that. Oh yeah, forgot to introduce myself. Sorry about that. Vita, the Crimson Iron Rider, Iron Knight of the Wolkenritter, soldiers of Our Lady, the Queen of the Night Sky, Mistress of the Book of Darkness. There is nothing I cannot destroy. How do you do?"

Usagi nodded jerkily in acknowledgement, finally regaining her voice. "W-what do you want?" she said, struggling not to panic.

Vita smiled and pointed at Usagi's chest. She could almost have sworn she felt something in there jump. "The same thing we wanted last time, girly. Come quietly, okay? All these little people around us don't have to be hurt."

Usagi was suddenly very conscious of all the people around them. Even if she dared risk transforming– something the nice space-wizard doctor had warned her against– she remembered quite clearly the speed and savagery with which the little girl had attacked Superman, one of if not the strongest and fastest being in the world. She remembered the state of little Green Lantern-chan, and knew she didn't have a prayer against this girl in front of her, at least if she started from 'completely normal and injured to boot'. Still, there had to be something she could do. Think, think…

Yes, it wasn't her strong suit, but desperate times, darn it!

"C-could I order one last ice-cream then?" Usagi said, the surrender in her voice only partially feigned, to her shame, but at least it was only partially.

Vita seemed to consider it. "Eh, why not?" she said magnanimously. "And get me one too."

A part of Usagi prickled at having to buy such divine treats for someone who was going to attack her, but she signaled for the ice-creams anyway. She was here so often the staff and her had worked out a series of hand-signals for this sort of thing.

She looked at the treat a bit forlornly when it arrived, ignoring how Vita was poking at hers like it was some kind of new toy. She'd ordered two 'Chocolate Overkill Omnicides', which the place touted as containing the highest concentration of chocolate that could legally be sold outside to the public without making anyone sign waivers. As a last meal, it was perfectly acceptable. As a last meal at all, it was pretty depressing.

A low rumbling began to echo in front of her, and she blinked. Vita had a spoon in her mouth, a little bit of dark creamy, sweet, milky, sticky, totally-not-Freudian-at-all substance staining her lips as she went cross-eyed, a low throbbing in her throat rising as if a plain powered by a hundred kittens was taking off. She swallowed and shuddered, pulling the spoon out of her mouth and staring at it in horrified wonder.

"Sweet Lady of the Book…" she breathed, staring at the bowl in front of her. Slowly, she poked in the spoon, lifting it before her with almost holy reverence. She stared at it, then put it in her mouth. Usagi tried not to think of how much it looked like some kind of sucking scene from a loli-doujin (and how she knew what that looked like, she will never admit to, and you will never know). "Oh, yeaaaahhhh… Ha! Aah! AH!"

Usagi and a few of the closer customers stared at Vita as she poked her spoon in again. She bought it to her mouth, but instead of putting it in the watchers were treated to the kind of intricate muscular contortions normally associated with octopi as Vita proceeded to lick as much of it off the spoon as she could. "Oh, yeeeeeeeeessss! OH! AH! YES! YES!"

Usagi stuck out her own tongue and looked at it in cross-eyed incredulity. Other watchers did the same, some trying to get their's to contort as Vita's had.

More began to watch in slowly mounting horrified perverted fascination as Vita took another scoop, her tongue slowly licking up her spoon in a way that made her head bob interestingly, making many people squirm. "Oh… AH! HA Ah! Yes, YES! MORE! I want MORE!" she moaned while her free hand pounded the table repeatedly.

Completely unmindful of her captive audience, Vita tossed aside her spoon, divining at the ice-cream bowl with reckless abandon, licking at the dark, creamy, sweet, milky, sticky, totally-not-Freudian-at-all confection like an anteater going after crack-covered ants, to a rising succession of noises that was causing several nosebleeds, dizziness, and a few instances of ruined underwear.

Usagi was frantically holding a tissue to her nose as Vita finally came up for air, eyes half-glazed in delirious pleasure. The rising crescendo Vita's… sounds… had taken in the last few moments had been… pornographic, to say the least.

The knight was staring at Usagi's own still untouched 'Chocolate Overkill Omnicide'. "Are you going to eat that?" Vita panted.

Usagi hastily shoved it at her, unsure whether she'd ever be able to look at ice-cream the same way again but definitely sure she wouldn't be able to eat any for the rest of the day. "S-sure, take it," she said, and she could hear the collective gulp of the rest of the room, who were all now staring at Vita with… well, they were staring at Vita in a way with no descriptor fit for polite company. Usagi was one of them. "Haven't you, ah, ever tasted ice-cream before?"

Vita shook her head as she pulled the other bowl closer to her. A bit of creamy, sweet, milky, sticky, totally-not-Freudian-at-all substance dripped down her cheek, and she raised a finger to wipe it off and stuck the finger in her mouth. There was another mass-gulp. "No, this was my first time." Another mass-gulp. "It… it was soooo GOOD! More… I want more! I… I want to be filled… I want to be FILLED… with ICE-CREAM!"

The room grew still, staring as Vita proceeded to molest the poor ice-cream in front of her, blush levels slowly rising. A couple near the back stood up, the boy hunched slightly as trying to stay bent as he and his girlfriend made a hasty retreat, trying to figure out where the closest motel was. Another girl suddenly jerked upright as her girlfriend put her hand in her skirt pocket.

Usagi prayed she be forgiven for what she was about to do. "Oh, you poor dear!" she said, raising a hand to get the counter's dazed attention. "No wonder you're so troubled! Sir, please give my friend as much ice-cream as she wants!" She gave Vita her most soulful look, and tried not to feel that somewhere, Beryl, Mettalia, Wiseman, Galaxia and Happosai were decrying her for evil levels of indecency. "As much as she wants. My treat."

Vita moaned in pleasure. Everyone else gave Usagi looks of mingled horror, disgust and perverted gratitude.

By the time Vita had worked on her third ice-cream, everyone was too busy watching the show to notice when someone entered the store.

The Iron Knight was busy finishing licking out the bowl in a highly evocative manner when someone tapped her on the shoulder. "Excuse me."

Vita turned.

Sailor Jupiter's punch broke the crimson shield the knight hastily put up into so many pieces, sending her flying and slamming into the window next to the booth, before crashing into and partially through the wall of the building across the street.

"You're in my seat," the pony-tailed brunette said, flexing the fingers of her hand. She turned to Usagi and said, quite loudly for the benefit of the staring crowd. "Are you all right, good citizen? Did that little girl who was actually an evil energy-draining monster in disguise hurt you? Never fear, the Senshi are here!"

"You're overdoing it," Usagi muttered out of the corner of her mouth, even as she clasped her hands dramatically, and stared at Sailor Jupiter with stars in her eyes. "Oh, thank you Sailor Jupiter-sama! That mean girl was using her evil magic to hold me prisoner and make me buy her ice-cream before she evilly drained me of power! How can I ever repay you?-!"

"Ohohohoho," Sailor Jupiter said loftily. "No need to thank me! Pass the goodwill along! I daresay a good friend of yours who's always there to help you probably deserves an ice-cream or something."

"I told you, she cleaned me out," Usagi hissed.

"Yeah, right," sailor Jupiter hissed right back.

"SANKT KAISER DAMN IT!" was the echoing but highly audible cry from across the street as masonry was moved. "THERE AREN'T SUPPOSED TO BE THIS MANY FRICKIN' MAGES ON THIS PLANET!"

"Saved," Sailor Jupiter hissed. She raised her voice back to cheesy-playing-for-the-crowd levels. "Well, there is still evil afoot! Please get yourselves somewhere safe, good citizens! Sailor Jupiter, AWAY!"

She awayed.

Usagi stared at the discarded ice-cream bowls and stood up, walking quickly towards the rest rooms. She'd just made it there when the penny dropped for everyone else. There was a mad rush for stalls.


"HOW THE HECK DID YOU GET HERE SO FAST!" Vita was yelling and pointing accusingly at the Sailor Senshi, who stood outside the broken window of the store like a wall. The mask Shamal had insisted they wore so that they couldn't be traced to Hayate aggravated her annoyance, which was a lot at the best of times.

Sailor Mars smiled grimly at her. "Green Lantern-chan told us about how you people operated. The range isn't good, but Sailor Mercury managed to pick you up when you approached Sailor Moon. Call it really bad timing on your part. We were just getting back from beating up some old Doom Tree spawn. Have you met Super Young Team, by the way? They were in the neighborhood and were nice enough to agree to come along when they heard you were coming, give you the old Tokyo-Gojira welcome."

"Doesn't Gojira usually kicked Tokyo's ass?" Crazy Shy Lolita Canary hissed.

"Hush, she's on a roll," Shiny Happy Aquazon hissed back.

"H-hi…" Big Atomic Battery Boy said, waving awkwardly.

"No, Battery-kun, you don't have to be polite to the pint-sized magical minion of evil," Sailor Venus explained kindly. "We beat her up, just like everyone else."

"Oh, sorry Venus-sempai," Battery (let's just call him that, shall we?) said.

Vita felt the familiar presence of Signum and Zafira suddenly appear at her side, and smirked as she watched the loony bin of mages in front of he suddenly grow more guarded. The front door of the store she'd just been throw out of– she made a note to convince Shamal to do some kind of transformative magic disguise on her so she could go back there– opened, and Sailor Jupiter stalked out.

"You!" Sailor Jupiter cried. "How dare you show your faces here!"

Signum stood impassive. "We are here for your Linker Cores," she said, voice even, not a ripple to betray what she felt.

"You and whose army?-!-?" Sailor Jupiter cried.

"NO!" screamed Sailor Mercury, but it was too late.

Signum snapped her fingers. "Servants, come forth."

Instantly, a large triangular array formed, and dozens of humanoid forms suddenly appeared. Some carried sword, some croquet mallets, others were beasts, and still others carried books.

"Servants Sabers," Signum ordered her units, pointing with Laevatein. "Attack."

"Servants Berserkers!" Vita cried, directing her own hammer-wielding units. "Attack!"

"Servants Avengers!" Zafira called. "Attack!"

"Servants Casters!" Signum said, gesturing. "Strike."

"No!" Sailor Mercury whispered as people, who could see where this was going, began to make a break for it, abandoning thier cars and just running. "Those are Dark Kingdom Youma. They have Dark Kingdom Youma!"

"Well, shit," Well-Spoken Sonic Lightning Flash said succinctly.

"Agreed," Most Excellent Superbat said.

Sailor Pluto stepped forward, one side of her face twisted in a snarling grin. "Bring it on." Sailor Uranus and Sailor Jupiter glared at her for taking their line.

"Raise barrier," Signum said, and the sky and world began to color strangely.

The two sides charged.


"Incredible…" the… magical medical healing person said as he ran a scanner over Negi's chest. "Your Linker Core is in nearly perfect condition, despite how much more extensively damaged it was compared to, um, Green Lantern-san."

Green Lantern and Negi blinked. "Really?" Negi said. "Extensively damaged? How?"

"Well, I'm not sure to the details, but your Linker Core appeared to have been highly degraded, as if something had already been attacking it even before it was drawn out by your attackers," the healer said, giving Negi an inscrutable look. The boy squirmed guiltily. "Nevertheless, it appears to have healed itself much faster than it should otherwise have."

Negi frowned, then snapped his fingers in realization. "Oh! The resort! That must have been it! Silly of me to forget."

Green Lantern raised an eyebrow at him. "Do you think this… 'resort' could be used to help Sailor Moon-sama and that boy Lee-san recover faster?"

Negi frowned. "It probably can. But the resort belongs to the Master, and we'll need her permission to use it."

"Your Master?" Green Lantern said.

"I think you've met her before. At least, she's spoken of you. Do you remember Evangeline-san?"

Negi and the healer were treated to the sight of Green Lantern suddenly stiffening, eyes going wide in purest terror behind her mask before she collapsed into a fetal ball, rocking back and forth on the floor. "…I don't want to die, I don't want to die, I don't want to die…" she muttered non-stop.

Negi sighed. "Really, why does everyone think the master is so bad?"

One could almost accuse him of being distracted by the sex, if he was so obviously not…


The area around Crown was a battlefield.

"COME ON!" Pluto cried, whirling her Time Key over her head with expert precision, and smashing it's tines into the jaw of a Zoid-Liger-like Avenger, breaking it's teeth and skull. "COME ON IF YOU THINK YOU'RE HARD ENOUGH! PLUTO IS STILL A PLANET!" She charged, the Time Key a whirlwind in her hands, parrying swords and hammers while crushing heads, limbs, chests and hands.

"Someone really needs to disconnect that woman's berserk button," Shiny Happy Aquazon said as she and Sailor Mercury worked defensively, the latter using her Mercury Aqua Rhapsody to try and hold the attacking drones in place, while the former used her powers to either main, cripple, crush, or outright attack with either crushing ice or hard-water constructs.

"We've tried, but the alcohol wasn't setting a good example," Sailor Mercury said, multi-tasking as she attacked, kept an eye on the readings her computer and visor were picking up, and tried to contact the Association's Network. "Mercury to all Associates, please respond! Calculator-san, please come in! Come in, please! Kira Death Note Paru-sama, are you there?"

Aquazon's eyebrow ran for her green hair. "'Kira Death Note Paru-sama'?" she said, clearly disbelieving.

Sailor Mercury grimaced. "If it makes you feel any better, everyone around her knows she's tilting toward evil and are keeping an eye on her."

Aquazon tought about that as she hit some charging Berserkers with a giant fist, sending them back but not really hurting them that much. "No, not really."

"Yeah, me neither."

Vita and her Berserkers were keeping the rest of the Inner Senshi and Battery Boy occupied, her Servants' wild swings in some cases literally tearing up the landscape as their opponents tried not to get crushed. Sailor Venus focused on trying to use her definitely-just-for-symbolism Love Me Chain to hold them down while Sailor Jupiter and Battery Boy unleashed their concentrated and area attacks. The things were hardy, however, and it was Sailor Mars who was making the most headway, taking her time to line up headshots with her Flame Sniper. Black mist ensued.

Well-Spoken Sonic Lightning Flash wove through the attackers, trying to trip them or push them against each other to keep them off balance and ineffectual. He'd given up trying to slow down and attack them when the blue-wearing Saber-types nearly skewered him. Crazy Shy Lolita Canary trailed in his wake, holding on tightly to his backpack, her weaponized cries of 'SUMIMASEN!' dopplering behind them. Some of the Servant's where knocked back, or dazed. A few unlucky ones who had it yelled into their ear had their heads asplode.


Most Excellent Superbat just drove through them on the Wonder Wagon. Why overcomplicate things?

Sailor Saturn and Zafira dueled. Unable to use her Silence Glaive Surprise due to the possible collateral damage, she took a more hands-on approach, using the Silence Glaive as a cross between a boar-spear and the can opener from hell, bracing herself against charges and using it's hooked end to tear him open, or at least trying to. Sailor Neptune guarded her back, using her mirror's Submarine Reflection as an area attack.

Sailor Uranus was having her rematch with Signum.

"Are you joking?" she said, dodging Sailor Uranus's attempted stab and slamming her elbow into the Senshi's torso. "You really insist on using that butter-knife as a weapon? That's just… sad. Not to mention strangely Freudian…"

"Shut up!" Sailor Uranus cried, attempting another thrust. Signum parried that away well, and looked like she should have been yawning while doing it. Sailor Uranus threw a punch with her other hand and Signum caught her by the wrist with contemptuous ease.

Sailor Uranus smiled and opened her hand. "World Shaking!"

Signum was blasted through the wall. Several, in fact.

"Shut up about it being Freudian, it's been done to death," Sailor Uranus said, twirling the ridiculously undersized Space Sword.

Several Saber-types dog-piled her as a response.

Signum pushed herself out of the rubble, one eyebrow twitching in annoyance. Again with the walls. Why is it she was always getting blasted through walls? Pushing herself up, she pulled the Book of Darkness from its hiding place, deciding that this one would be as good a target as any. It wasn't because Signum was being petty. No, definitely not. In fact, this was an acknowledgement of the ability of a worthy opponent! How better to recognize their skills than to declare them so dangerous to yourself you have to take them down right then and there with underhanded tactics and numerical superiority? Really. Really.

The pages opened as Signum stopped forward, her troops keeping the Senshi down with shear weight of numbers, in both sense of the term. She held up the book, which began to float. "Book of Darkness, begin download."

A rose cut her cheek. At about the same time, a manhole cover slammed into the Book like a discus, sending it flying into but not through a wall. If it could talk, it would have gone 'Wheeeeeee!'.

The Wonder Wagon plowed into the pile-up, knocking most of the Sabers off Sailor Uranus as Superbat leapt acrobatically out of the driver's seat, contorting like a snake to lash out with both feet at a Saber before flipping over to pull still ones off Sailor Uranus.

Signum stared at the blood on the hand she'd clamped over her cheek. How will I explain this to Hayate…?

The thought drifted through her head even as her instincts screamed, and Laevatein whirled, cutting three more roses out of the air, knocking away two more, and missing one to have it impale itself into her thigh, it's barbs tearing as it lodged itself in like a knife.

"Wow," a voice from above said, sounding pleasantly surprised, if grim. "This is new. Usually by the time I make it across town, it's all done except for the blasting."

Signum looked up at the man in the tuxedo, red-lined cape, mask and top hat standing on top of a conveniently undamaged lamppost, standing on the lampshade as if he were as light as a feather. She narrowed her eyes and hefted Laevantein. He twirled his cane, grabbing the knobbed end and drawing out a long, narrow blade. It went 'ting!'.

There was a long, drawn out dramatic moment in which several Servants tried to attack Tuxedo Kamen and promptly received a rose in the eye for their trouble, either severely disorienting or outright killing them, or some other projectile, such as a hard-water shot or an explosive superbatarang; and Sailor Uranus tried to charge at Signum several times, only to be tackled or otherwise detained by Servants herself, to Most Excellent Superbat's increasing amusement. Around them, attack cries, declarations of how "Pluto is still a planet, darn it!", sounds of bloody violence, Vita's deep blue acid swearing about how Earth was drug-tripping insane, and some random explosions echoed around them.

Signum flew upwards, Laevantein a deadly Freudian statement. Tuxedo Kamen threw left handed, a pair of roses flying and forcing Signum to alter her grip to deflect the two, even as Tuxedo Kamen leapt, blade low and cape whirling distractingly around him. Their blades met, the heavier Laevatein barely budging against the lighter sword-cane. Tuxedo Kamen spun in midair, the sheath portion of the came gripped in his left fist to slam backhanded into Signum's head. Signum quickly shifted Laevatein to block, foot flashing out to kick her opponent. Her foot met only cape, there was a disorienting whirl, and the cape was wrapped taught around her leg even as it was tugged to pull her to the ground.

She hit the ground before she could activate her flight, some ancient primate instinct killing it as she tried to balance herself on her feet, Laevatein swinging on another instinct and meeting the cane-sword, pushing it back slightly. Tuxedo Kamen disengaged, nearly making Signum fall again before she tore the cape from around her leg, leaving the garment ragged. Ignoring the clothing damage, he lunged, blade flashing straight as a bullet, causing Signum to dodge, Laevatein rising to parry even as pain bit into her left bicep as the cane blade clipped it, drawing blood.

Hayate is definitely going to worry… was Signum's last clearly defined thought before everything became a whirl of blades, blood, roses and that damned distracting cape…


"Green Lantern!" Yuuno cried as she and Negi stepped out of the examination room. "How did it go?"

Nanoha grinned. "Complete recovery!" she said. "And Negi-chan's all right too, though not all the way yet."

Negi winced slightly, but manfully– HA!– pressed on. "I'm mostly good to go, though I probably shouldn't cast Thousand Thunderbolts or Titan Slayer, and definitely not use Magia Erebea yet. But Dr. Bones said it should be all right for me to use my other magic."

"That's great," Fate said, holding out Bardiche. "Bardiche is fine too. Raging Heart technically is as well, but they're still installing that experimental component."

"It's not experimental, it will work," Ring-chan said primly. "The math says it should."

Before anyone could respond, one of the TSAB people, his uniform denoting what Nanoha could recognize as someone low in the pecking order, ran up to them, skidding to a halt and saluting. "Begging you pardon ladies, sir, but you have an emergency message from the TSAB office in non-administered world 97."

The others looked at each other in alarm.

Nanoha phased through the nearest wall with her ring and was heading for outside as fast a possible, already building up speed. "Relay the transmission to me!" her voice cried from Yuuno's ring.

Yuuno frowned. "Does this mean I have to drive everyone back home?" he muttered. "Man, I hope I can find the way back…"


Chrono glared at the barrier over most of Juuban– not that he really knew what the area was called– with annoyance. He could see the melee that was happening inside, and momentarily wished he had a Zord to blast this problem away with. Or even… no, on second thought, being able to use 'Million Nanohas Emerald Starlight Breaker Rain' wouldn't be such a good thing. He heard Limiters sucked.

"Secure the perimeter," he ordered the TSAB mages with him. "When the barrier drops, be ready to set up our own to contain them. This ends today."

Not exactly Uchiha-Bat-Springfield levels of vengeance, but he was not letting that damned Book ruin more lives…


A Schwalbe Fliegen bopped Sailor Saturn on the back of the head as she tried to keep her Silence Block up in the face of Vita's attack, knocking her unconscious and felling her like a dropped puppet. Sailor Neptune was taken down the same way.

"Finally," Vita growled. Thank goodness these Magical Girl didn't seem be familiar with the idea of redirectable attacks, apparently mainly relying on the fire-and-forget variety. She directed two of her Berserkers to hold them down, having the rest form a defensive line as she called the Book of Darkness to her, having it zip out of wherever Tuxedo Kamen's manhole cover had sent it flying.

The two Senshi writhed as their Linker Cores were drawn out and downloaded, even as a sudden outcry indicated that someone had finally noticed the two downed Senshi. Vita ignored them, trusting Shamal's handiwork to do its thing as she finished completely downloading the green-haired woman and netting a good 29 pages. More than enough to offset the cost of making the Servants. She began on the other…

A cry of 'Stinger Ray!' interrupted the process at 35 pages– with many more to go– forcing Vita to dodge back, taking the Book of Darkness with her lest it get damaged. Vita glared up.

Chrono floated over the battlefield, eyes glaring at the book in her hands. "I am TSAB operative, code-name Tempus," he said. He felt silly calling himself that, but Nanoha had repeatedly driven home the monumental stupidity of operating under your own name on Earth, and she'd probably know. It was also the reason he was wearing a domino mask that had been impregnated with what little the TSAB had been able to decipher of the magic in Ala Alba's disguise glasses. "Surrender the Book of Darkness and lay down your device! If you don't resist, you will be granted the chance to plead in your own defense."

Vita rolled her eyes. "What's that legalistic gobbledegook supposed to mean, anyway!-?"

"It means if you say no, I get to kick your ass," Tempus said.

Vita grinned ferally. "Bring it, little boy! Graf Eisen, Raketenform! Raketen Hammer!" A cartridge was ejected as Vita spun upwards.

"I am a MAN!" Tempus shot back in response as he swung S2U (or as Amy liked to call it, 'Song To You'), energy concentrating around the Device. "BREAK… IMPULSE!"

There was an impact. These words are completely insufficient to portray the damaged caused, but there you go.


Somewhere, Carter Grayson, Mirror-traveling Power Ranger, sneezed.

"You okay, Carter?" Chrono, of SPD said, looking at the senior Ranger with concern. Vivio and Yuuno also looked at him.

Carter frowned. "I'm fine. Although for some reason I want to yell at you for theft."

"Huh?" Chrono said, confused.

"Yeah, I don't get it either."


"Wah, Chrono is so COOL, calling himself Tempus!" Amy squealed. "Two thumbs up!"


- To be continued...


A/N: Long one, isn't it? It might be a while for me to get back to my Harry fics. Though I have no intention of letting those die off, else how am I going to cross them over with this madness?

Let us take a moment to review the sides here. On the one hand, we have a paper-work happy, drill-sergeant-from-hell, overkill-loving ten year-old Magical Girl Green Lantern and her Amazing Allies. These Amazing Allies include: the ultimate Dark Magical Girl; a technically Dark Magical Boy; Ferret Lantern, aka Nanoha's male counterpart in everything (offense magic versus Defense/Support Magic); the most experienced Magical Girl Team in the Country, who specialize in fighting Energy Drainers, have magic that mainly lean towards the Fire-and-Forget big bang school, a character I am personally going to try and Badass up without going as extreme as Tomoyo (yes, I admit I overdid her, just a little. But it's fun, so she stays), and might (?) be able to resurrect if it goes really bad; Ala frickin' Alba, who consist of the trained-byEvangeline-and-RAKAN! Legacy badass Negi Springfield, Badass Princess (because everything's better with Princesses) Kagurazaka 'Magic-Canceller-with-overly-long-real-name' Asuna, and most of the spectrum of badass from librarians to healers; part of the cast of Fate/Stay Night who will get their own upgrades before long, but are already lethal by themselves (the crossover comic puts young Nanoha as impressed by Miyu and Illya's firepower. Consider that. Little Miss Gundam Wing Zero was impressed!); Card Mistress Sakura, and by extension Hellmode Tomoyo and anyone and anything she can buy beg, steal, or borrow; and the superhero teams of Super Young Team, Big Science Action, Superman and a hidden Cassandra Cain (Doe). Notice that on this list, Superman is an afterthought. Plus the goddamned BATMAN is in the country…

Arrayed against them are the Wolkenritter: four kinds of fetish fu– er, Magic Knights, in the service of a terminally ill little girl who ranks high on the goodness and light scale(Sound Stages not withstanding), who seems to be just genuinely happy that she's not going to die alone anymore (there's a definite sense of this to me). Said knights also just want to live the way they've been living, in blissful happiness with Hayate. Arrayed against them are the above, a group who would be overkill for Cosmo Entelecheia, who in their turn are a group whose standard equipment can include Reality Warping Weapons as a standard issue (hey, Tsukuyomi got her hands on one). All the Knights have is experience (admittedly a lot), their devices (and unlike Nanoha, they probably don't have repair facilities, since Shamal can only do so much), a method of creating troops that are, admittedly, just glorified cannon fodder, and unwavering love and devotion to their cause and to Hayate (which is practically the same thing).

What does Narrative Causality say?

Chisame. Beautiful Net Idol Chiu-sama by day, Magical Girl net hero The Calculator by night! It was a name too good to give to a villain…

Been on a HayatexVita kick for some reason. Size-compatibility issues. Maybe I shouldn't check out the doujin-moes when I write. This overlaps with my YuunoxVita kick, my YuunoxHayate kick, my YuunoxShamal kick, my YuunoxSignum kick, my ArfxZafira kick and my weird Ring-chanxRaging Heart kick.

In a bit of throw away dialogue, it is mentioned how Signum likes baths. Not sure what the fandom position on that is, but I decided to grab it and– how did I put it in my other fic? Ah, yes– run off with it beyond the bounds of reason and sense. So, pretty much business as usual for me. From what I've seen of the anime, Hayate doesn't seem as perverted as people make her out to be. Sure, I read the A's Manga, but I didn't take any of the 4-komas seriously. I heard it's also revealed in the sound stages, but which one?

It probably says something bad about me that I like to use Vita for the racy scenes…

There's no reason why Tuxy didn't get a sword-cane at some point. I'm filling under 'because it's cool!'. It actually makes more sense than him just having a generic cane. I don't think of him as generally useless, myself. Think about it. He's usually busier than the girls, what with having to support himself and being in college. The reason it takes him so long to get to a fight is because not only is he likely to be coming from somewhere it's not easy to slip away from, he also probably has to run all the way to where the fight is. The fact that he usually appears so soon after a fight starts (after all, he's usually there anywhere between five and ten minutes), even if only just I time to say something encouraging or pull of a timely rescue, is actually pretty darn impressive. I intend to do what I can to elevate him to proper levels of badass. He probably also has a lot of issues I'd like to explore, Of Love and Bunnies-style…

Yes, I overused the word 'Freudian'. To be fair, they are all in relevant locations.


A Dark Path To The Kingdom: The Death of a Heroic Spirit, Berserker.


"NO!" Illya cried, dropping Magical Ruby as she ran to her fallen Servant's side. "Berserker! Berserker, don't die! You can't die! You're a hero! HEROES DON'T DIE!"

"Of… c-course we d-do," a quiet voice said from beneath Berserker's helmet, quite unlike the hate-filed molten gravel of his usual snarling. "How else do we become h-heroes?"

"Berserker!" Illya exclaimed. "You're… how… no, don't talk! Stay still! We'll get you help! Batman-sama, help him!"

"N-no," Berserker said, weakly. His voice was soft now, not terror incarnate. "I remember this. Death is coming for me again, Illya. She is coming…"

"Berserker…" Illya sobbed, trying to support the enormous Servant's head on her lap, trying to do what she could to make him comfortable. "I… I don't even know your name…"

Berserker's head shifted slightly, and the shadows changed shape enough that one could almost say they'd seen a smile. "Does it matter now?"

"Please…" Illya said softly, dashing at her eyes with her arm. "Please, tell me your name. Tell me so I can remember you… tell me what you were called in life…"

"I…" Berserker said hesitantly, voice weak. "I'm not sure it was ever my n-name to begin with."

"Please, a name, anything!" Illya cried. "Someone needs to remember… you're owned that much. Who are you, my Berserker? What were you called in life?"

"I… I…"

"Yes?" Illya breathed.

"I was the terror that soared through the darkened skies…"

"Berserker…" Illya said, touching his helm, feeling the horns digging into her legs.

"I was the law from the shadows…"

She could feel him growing weaker, felt their contract breaking, the Command Seal about to become useless.

"I was darkness. I was justice. I was vengeance," Berserker said quietly, some of his old strength and gravel returning even as his Grail-given life flowed away. "I was the night. I… was… w-was… B-b–…" A shudder went through him and he lay still.

Illya's tears fell like rain as she cradled his face, shaking her head in denial. "No…" she muttered. "No… no… no…! BERSERKER!"

The Dark Knight Detective watched, still as death, silent witness to a young girl's pain and the end of a hero…




ATTENTION! ACHTUNG! I have taken the beautiful Trope-tan hostage! Give TV Tropes to me and she won't get hurt! If you refuse… well, I still have the Overfiend, Great Paru-sama Edition…


Next, on Green Lantern Nanoha! Who will prevail, Signum or Tuxedo Kamen? How will Fate react when she learns her battle-girlfriend has been cheating on her? Nanoha faces off against the Knights without Raging Heart! How will she fare? Until next time, this is Shadow, signing off!