Disclaimer: I do not own the anime Le Chevailer D'Eon or its characters. If I did, the ending would be very different indeed…

This is an AU, modern times fic in set in a world that is very different from 18th century France. This is a response to a challenge by XsecretX. Expect comic culture shock when our Frenchmen and Frenchwomen travel to the Land of the Rising Sun. Maybe D'Eon wearing a dress isn't that unusual at a Cosplay convention…

1. The Flight

D'Eon's POV

Okay, so maybe I've fallen victim to my sis' wiles again. I hate flying but I am zipping about a couple thousand feet in the air in a pressurized aluminium can they call a plane. It is not natural! Don't get me started on the long haul flights and three transit stopovers…"Think about it, D'Eon! Spend your summer vacation in the exotic Far East… at the expense of Vee TV," she said. What she didn't tell me is that our dear stepbrother is joining us. Or her deadbeat buddy from college…I wish she had invited Anna instead…Well, Lia is the jet-setting lead anchorwoman of France's top cable network, so I suppose she could pull a few strings to… Oh no, don't feel so good… I get seasick just crossing the Channel to visit Aunt Mary. Where's that airsick bag?


"D'EON! Not my loafers!" Durand shouted a warning as D'Eon spewed his breakfast. "Are we there yet? My butt's hurting from sitting so long…" a redhead youngster behind Durand whined. "Quit your yapping. Some of us are trying to sleep!" a grey-haired man complained. "When I was your age, we didn't have any planes and…"

"You rode east on horses with the Crusades, didn't you, Gramps?"

"Insolent brat! We came on troop transports to fight a war!" Robin yelped as he was swatted with a magazine. Teillagory then started off on a graphic description of the worst battles of WWII fought on the beaches of Normandy and Iwo Jima. D'Eon cringed as his stomach threatened revolt.


Up front in business class…

"Here's to a successful scoop," Lia and Maximilien clink martini glasses. "I wonder how D'Eon is coping back there…" Lia glanced at the curtain separating coach from business class. "Well, set your mind at ease. Durand did volunteer to baby-sit didn't he?" Maximilien lifted Lia's hand to his lips. Even if Durand couldn't, their old cameraman Teillagory and his grandson Robin should be able to keep him out of trouble. Maximilien's eyes caught sight of a familiar figure up front.

"Don't look now, Lia. I believe that guy in Seat 6B is our esteemed CEO Louis."

"I guess you are right… Guess he is going to meet up with Marie in Tokyo."

"Wait, is that lady next to him…"

"Yup, it's that bitch whose skirt he has his hand up recently," Lia replied without batting an eyelid. Maximilien's lips twisted in a sardonic grin. Pompadour. Marie would not be amused. The failing marriage between their CEO and their major shareholder Marie was old news. Everyone knew Louis married Marie because she was the heiress to Vee TV's predecessor, the multibillion dollar V-news.

"Marie will definitely file for divorce this time. And she will file for custody of her little boy," Lia sipped at her martini. Marie was in Japan to meet in secret with a certain well-known attorney to discuss the proceedings. Of course, most of the office did not know that. Lia grinned. She had fixed that appointment. There would be one helluva shake-up in the network when Marie takes over. Whatever happens, Lia wanted to make sure her position and those of her closest friends are secured. Humming, she studied their planned itinerary for Sexy Sukino Report which they will be filming later in their trip.


Narita Airport, Japan…

"Hallelujah, terra firma!" D'Eon shakily smiled as he staggered off the plane with Durand's help. "I can't wait to check into that resort…" A vision of a soothing spa and scenic mountains filled his mind.

"Eh? Didn't Mademoiselle Lia tell you? We have to catch another 2 hour flight to Hokkaido where the resort is…" Robin chirped. "D'Eon?" D'Eon fainted. "Medic! We need a medic here!" Durand called out. He pulled off his jacket and started flapping it over D'Eon's face. Where was Lia?

In the ladies, Lia was in the midst of a conversation on her mobile…

"Elizaveta will be at the hot springs resort… No, there is a little creamery there you can get Anna to take Auguste to. The proprietor is half-French… Their cheesecakes are to die for… Oh, you wouldn't believe what I saw on the flight. Louis and Pompadour. Maximilien has gone to verify their flight details, they are heading the same way as us… you need some evidence? Come on, that is a piece of cake. Max and I were PIs before we signed up with Vee TV…"

She switched off her phone and walked out. Marie, her son and their young au pair were already in Sapporo. They should be reaching the resort before them.

Durand checked his watch. They needed to catch their bus to Haneda for the domestic flight. D'Eon's face was still as white as a sheet and he was sprawled over a bench in the arrival hall.


Chitose airport, Hokkaido

Marie, the daughter of a media mogul and major shareholder of Vee TV, hung up on Lia and slipped on her Louis Vutton sunglasses. Anna was positively struggling with their luggage. Marie smiled as she walked over to help. Auguste was seated nearby. Belle yipped from her travel cage, tail wagging in glee. "Shiro Koibito chocs!" Anna's eyes glowed with sheer delight when she spotted the pricey and famous confection in a store window. The young au pair did have a sweet tooth. "Ah, Royce chocolates… Japanese fluffy cheesecake… Hokkaido ice cream…"

"Go easy on those, Anna. Our shopping is only just starting," Marie smiled. Her eyes were on an expensive Burberry's overcoat and matching scarf. Those Prada killer heels look lovely.


On the connecting flight…

"Durand? Why is my brother semi-conscious?" Lia asked sweetly as she passed an Astroboy comic book to Robin, which the boy grudgingly accepted. She thought Robin could use some reading materials to keep him from annoying Teillagory or Durand. Robin thought he was too old for kiddie comics. "Sorry, Lia. I guess those pills knocked him out…" Durand replied sheepishly. "What pills may those be?" she asked. D'Eon let out a soft moan in his seat and sucked his thumb. "Probably those he got busted for possession of back in Paris' Coco Bongo," Robin replied.

"DURAND! What did you slip into my brother's OJ?" Lia grabbed Durand by his Armani scarf. Durand started choking.

"Miss, please kindly refrain from strangling your boyfriend on this flight…" a smiling air stewardess bowed politely. Lia took the Astroboy comic from Robin and swatted Durand. "Just some sleeping pills. I mickey-finned him, that's all!"

"Miss, we will have to divert this flight if you two keep fighting…" the air stewardess said.

"Lia, he should come out of it by the time we reach Hokkaido, I only slipped him one…"

"He better, Durand…" Maximilien folded his arms as he took in the sight from business class. "Keep it down, please. You are going to ruin the sound. I have reason to believe our CEO and his paramour are hogging the plane's washroom for some kinky purposes. We can't let this flight be diverted, can't we?" He patted his coat and trousers in mock seriousness. "Now where did I put my camera pen?"

Lia giggled. She bet Max had his pen switched to record. Maximilien had visited the business class washroom just before Louis and his mistress commandeered it. The other washroom had a suspicious 'Out of Order' sign written in both Japanese and French. She would need to slip in next to retrieve Max's pen. "I think I need to powder my nose…" Lia took her place before the occupied washroom and ripped off the 'Out of Order' sign on the other one.

"You two are devious," Durand chuckled.

Author's Notes:

I turned Belle from a talking skull to a dog. It will be plain freaky if a well-dressed socialite like Marie totes a skull about. Chihuahuas are a different matter. Anna sounds like a bubbly teenaged girl.