Hey guys! LAZF here. I had an idea I wanted to throw into the mix of hiatus's I have. I promise, I'll work on them. And finish them. But I really, really like this story. It's all human, as always. Yepp. (:
Read and review!
DISCLAIMER: not stephenie meyer.
btw. it's eclipse day! :DD
"Where were you?"
God. The same question. Every single time I simply walk through the front door of our one-bedroom apartment, I get asked the same question. No matter how many times I told him the answer. Same, every single time.
"Jake," I said quietly, dropping my heavy bag on the ground. "I was at study group. Like always."
He gave me a look, as if I had done something wrong. I shouldn't have said 'like always'. Oh, god.
"Don't talk back to me," he said, his face too close to mine.
"Now," he gave a few inches. "study group? Really? Every night this week, Bella, you've been at 'study group'," he made air quotations around the statement. I simply nodded.
"What the hell do you people do there?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. I sighed.
"Study? Finals are soon. We all wanna get out of school," and out of here. I couldn't just up and leave; no, I would've done that a long time ago. Jacob has threatened almost everything possible if I left.
I'm pretty much stuck.
"Why so fast to get out of school? Plan to run away with someone?" he got angrier, pushing his face closer to me.
"No! School is lame," I said, trying to lift the tension in the air. He shrugged and laughed one hard laugh.
"I wouldn't know. I don't go."
Ahh, yes. I support this...'family'. I go to school. I work at the local bookstore whenever I possibly can. I work my ass off for him. What do I get in return?
You don't want to know.
It seemed like the subject had been covered, so I began walking to the bathroom. I made it halfway there until he was infront of me again.
"Wait, wait, wait. Who is in this 'study group'?" he stared into my eyes. Not that 'i love you' kinda stare, no, no, no. It's his...death stare.
In pretty much every sense of the word.
"Me, Angela, Mike, Ben, and Jessica," I said quietly. I knew the two male figures in the sentence would bother him.
"Ooooh. Mike and Ben? Hm." he started pacing infront of me. I sighed.
"Jake! Mike is with Jessica again, and Ben is still with Angela," I said. He stared at me. Silence. Silence.
God. I hated his silence. Hated it. When he was talking, yelling, screaming, etc., I could tell by the tone of his voice how the rest of the 'conversation' would go. I could tell if he was just going to tell me to shut up and leave, or if he was going to fix matters with his own hands. But with the silence, I had no idea what would happen. He could just leave me alone, or strike out.
One happens more than the other.
I counted. Fifty-six, fifty-seven. I listened to his breathing. Fast. Fast. Slow. Slow. Slower...calm.
I mentally breathed a sigh of relief. Maybe I could be okay tonight.
"Well," he took a deep breath. "Whatever. Go take a shower. Be in the bedroom in twenty minutes." he began walking away.
"Wait. Jake, please, I'm exhaus-"
"Twenty. Minutes." and he left the room.
As soon as he was out of sight, the tears began to slowly spill from my eyes. I'd never, ever, cry infront of him. Who knows what would happen.
Oh yeah. I do know.
I walked slowly to the bathroom. I locked the door behind me. This was pretty much the only place I felt safe.
I stripped out of my clothes and stared at myself in the mirror. I hated the way I looked. The way my eyes weren't the right shade of brown. I was fat. I was a bitch. I was everything that a guy hates. And that's why I get treated like I do. I'm not good enough, and I deserve punishment.
I stood under the hot water with tears endlessly running down my face. I wanted to get out of this so, so badly. I couldn't. I'd be in more danger if I left than if I stayed.
Why would I leave, anyway? I am nothing. Jake had explained to me once. The one time I had finally spoken up.
"Bella, I wanna see you try to make it out in the real world without me," he scuffed as I stood crying by the door, my bag in my hand. I had to leave.
"I can make it. You are just making me think I can-"
"Don't you dare backtalk to me. You can not make it out alone. You are the type of girl everyone hates. No one but me has accepted you. So I would love to see you try," he came close. "but you'll have to make it past me to make it out."
I don't really wanna remember the rest.
I guess I'm just stuck here. Forever. Or until he kills me.
Both could happen.
I hadn't realized how long I had been in here. I had spaced out, and it had definitely been more than twenty minutes.
"Isabella! Get out here! You're wasting water!" he screamed. I fumbled to turn off the water and change into pajamas. I put on a light blue tank top and black shorts. I hope he liked this.
I walked out the door, and my arm was grabbed in a tight embrace. I was pulled off to the bedroom, and stuck there forever.
I woke up in a daze. My head hurt. My legs hurt. My stomach hurt. God, everything hurt. I don't really know what happen last night. I passed out, due to the blow to the head he gave me because of my long shower. I turned my head, praying he wasn't there. He wasn't. I breathed a sigh of relief. I got out of bed, stretching my aching limbs. I was careful to be quiet, just incase he was in fact home. I peeked my head out of the doorway into the empty apartment.
"Thank god," I said quietly and walked out to the kitchen. It was actually nice. I rarely got quiet time. I went to get eggs out of the refridgerator for breakfast when I saw a note fluttering on the door. I took it off.
I went out. I'll be back sometime. Tonight? Tomorrow? Who knows. You better be waiting for me when I get home. We don't want a repeat of last night.
Or do we?
Haha. Don't do anything stupid.
Because you will pay.
ps. dont open this fridge. there isn't anything in there for you to have. don't want you getting any fatter than you are, do we?
I crumbled up the paper and threw it as hard as I could. I couldn't do this anymore! I can't keep getting verbally abused and put down!
I was defeated under his words and I went and sat down on the couch. I pulled my knees up to my chest and cried silently. I can't take this anymore. I need to learn a way to push it out. Get away.
But I couldn't.
My 'friends', weren't really friends at all. They just let me in out of pity. Jacob told me that's what they told him.
I sat on the couch silently until I realized I had work today. I sighed in a bit of relief, though. I did love my job. I worked with books all day long. The bookstore was never busy, so I could read all day. Fiction, romance, comedy, classics. I loved it. And I was away from Jacob for the day. Thank god.
I changed quickly and walked out the door. Jacob keeps the car during the day; afraid I'll leave him. So I walk the ten blocks to work.
It's nice out, for a change. People walk by and wave, say hello. I don't answer them. I was taught not to answer to people. I was below them.
I made it to work and went behind my counter. The day went by slowly; for that I was thankful. People came up ocassionally to buy books or ask questions, but other than that, I was alone.
One boy came up towards the end of my shift. I was putting books back on the shelf when someone came up behind me.
"Excuse me," he tapped on my shoulder. I flinched at the touch and turned around fast. He looked startled.
"Oh, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to frighten you," he said quietly. I tried to form a coharent thought, but failed to do so. He was...beautiful. His eyes were the greenest I've ever seen in my life. His hair looked so...soft. And his face. His face. Beautiful.
"It's...it's okay. Really," I smiled softly. I knew I wasn't aloud to talk to people, but I couldn't help it."uhm, can I help you with anything? The store is about to close."
"I know. I just...," he was thinking of something to say. His face turned red. I smiled lightly. "I don't really know."
We stood in an akward silence. I didn't want to say goodbye, but I didn't want to talk to him, either. What if Jacob showed up?
Oh, that would be horrible.
He seemed to take a deep breath and smiled. "My name's Edward Cullen."
He held out his hand. I didn't know what to do. I mean, I did. I knew to shake his hand. But no one had ever wanted to shake my hand. I gripped it feebly with my hand.
"Isabella Swan. Or Bella. I prefer Bella," I said quietly. He smiled.
"Well, Bella, does a girl like you happen to have a cell phone number?" he smiled. He was asking for my number? How...how did he even have the sense to want to talk to me! I couldn't. I couldn't give out my number. Jake would kill me.
"Uhm, no. Sorry," I wasn't about to let that stop him. "but I work here everyday."
He smiled. "I'll come by again. Tomorrow."
A strange feeling overcame me. My stomach felt all full of butterflies. I couldn't wait.
Then the other half of me was screaming at me to tell him to go away. Go away, and never come back.
"Okay," I smiled feebly. He smiled at me and walked away.
"See you later, Bella," he called back.
My name never sounded so sweet on someone's tongue.
Review, darlings. (:
Have fun at your Eclipse showings!