Thank you all for the reviews… they encouraged me a lot and inspired me to continue. Meant a lot to me especially since this is my first In Plain Sight fic…
just had to write it though. I could not stand it. Still don't own In Plain Sight or any other affiliated characters cause if I did… the season would have ended differently, kind of like this:
I'm thinking… I'm an idiot.
I'm thinking… what am I doing here? I'm sitting looking out the window of my Mexican suite. The sunset and the beach seem to have a calming effect on me.
On the brochure it's advertised as paradise, but that all depends on who is sharing paradise with you.
After the room service attendant leaves…
I'm thinking… I wish I wasn't so weak. I wish I hadn't called the man who is coming towards me now; if I had known ahead of time Marshall would've picked then to call me on my shit…
I wouldn't have called Faber on my way into the office. We both knew what this was… no strings, no attachments, no hurt. I know this was supposed to be simple, meaningless…
I thought I needed someone, anyone on this trip.
I'm thinking… I wish he was Marshall. But Marshall isn't just someone, he's not just anyone to me. I can't stop thinking, I can't get Marshall off of my mind.
I'm thinking… I wish Marshall was the man who had gone walking and swimming with me on the beach earlier,
instead it's Faber who is freshly showered after that little beach excursion and standing here.
I'm thinking… I wish Marshall was the one in just a towel before me.
I'm thinking… I wish Marshall had brought me the wine; I realize he should be the one sharing this bottle with me.
I'm thinking… I wonder if closing my eyes will help me pretend the man with me now, is the one I really want.
I'm thinking… Maybe if I pretend that it's Marshall touching me, kissing me, maybe I'll feel something…
I try to feel anything at all. I try to get Marshall out of my system, his haunting words out of my head.
I'm thinking… this little experiment is crap; so much for science.
I'm thinking… he shouldn't be surprised when I break the kiss and when I do break it; he doesn't seem shocked at all as if he already knew we would end up here.
He says, "You're thinking that it's not me you want to be on this vacation with. You think that this is a mistake don't you?"
I reply, "I'm…"
He interrupts, "It's okay… don't apologize. It isn't a complete waste. I haven't had a vacation in years, almost forgot what the sun looks like.
Hey, you can't blame a guy for trying. But, if that Marshall of yours ever breaks your heart…"
"He won't." I state as a matter of fact.
He replies, "Then you better get going… What are you waiting for?"
"I'm not waiting on anything anymore."
"Good for you…." He says with a sincere smile.
"Thanks," I reply wearing a smile of my own.
I hurriedly change and grab my things from the other room, grateful I hadn't had time to unpack much.
As I start to leave this "Eden," and slip through the door, I hear Faber say one last thing: