This is still for my darling Monique.

This chapter comes equipped with a smut warning so…read at your own risk.

WARNINGS: Language, Sex, Violence, Dark Themes, Blood



Carmen ended up taking the entire day off even though she had taken the next day off too for Mason's birthday party. She had dinner with Mason, Logan and Chris, putting Mason to bed early and then waking him up the next morning with a cupcake. He was so excited that he got to have a cupcake for breakfast that he completely forgot he was going to ask his mother some more about his father, and simply had a pleasant morning with her, playing and opening up a couple presents and then getting dressed.

"Momma, Uncle Logan is coming, right?" Mason asked her as she set up outside.

Carmen smiled at him. "Yes, I promise he is coming to see you today. So is Uncle Chris, and Aunt Mandy—and all your friends from school that you invited that can come. Don't worry about it."

"I'm not worrying." Mason told her, shrugging. "I was just wondering. Do you…do you think Daddy knows, Momma?"

"He probably does." Carmen replied with a small nod, not looking Mason in the eye as she tied the balloons on the mailbox to signal that their house was the 'party' house. "Why don't you run out back and make sure that all the games you want are all set up?"

Mason nodded and hurried into the house to go out back instead of using the gate on the side of the house. Carmen laughed a little and shook her head, looking up when she saw Chris drive up, making a face and shaking her head more, this time in protest. Logan got out of the passenger seat and then he took a deep breath and held his hands up in surrender—Mason's present in one hand—as Wade got out of the backseat and smiled a little, glad he was getting his way.

"This isn't a fucking game!" Carmen told them, looking at them all and sighing loudly. "I don't want this to happen! I don't want Mason to meet his father and then in turn be disappointed when he takes off and doesn't come back for ten years this time! I'm not doing that to him! And if you guys really loved him like you say you do, you wouldn't do this to him either!"

Logan walked up to her after handing Chris the gift and placed a hand on each of her shoulders. "If he leaves and doesn't come back, I'll hunt him down and cut his dick off. That work for you?"

"He has the right to meet his own son, Car." Chris said with a shrug. "I don't particularly like the idea either, but this is the right thing to do."

"Way to be on my side without being on my side, guys." Wade told them when the words sank in. "I'm much obliged."

It was at that moment that the front door opened and Mason came out onto the porch, standing there as his eyes rested on his father. He recognized him from his pictures—the scar on his face and everything—and yet he didn't know what to do. Mason had always thought about what it would be like to finally see his father, but now that the moment had presented himself he didn't know whether to be happy or mad. Wade had done this to his family and yet…and yet he was his father.

"Daddy?" Mason asked him.

Wade smiled awkwardly and gave a little wave. "Hey, Buddy—happy birthday."

"Mason, Sweet-Pea, wanna take Uncle Chris and Uncle Logan out back to see your new swing set while I talk to your dad real quick? I promise I will send him out back to you in just a moment." Carmen explained when no one moved or spoke.

"Momma got me just the one I wanted." Mason said as he nodded, taking hold of Chris' hand and pulling him towards the house. "She even had a sand box set up, but I think she did that more for her."

Chris chuckled and nodded. "Well of course—your Mom has to get in her sand castle making time naturally."

Wade laughed as the others did, watching them disappear into the house and catching Carmen's hand as she went to hit him. His reflexes were still spot on and she sighed as he gave her a look and shook his head, pulling her hand back and growling because she knew she had lost. It wasn't even entirely about him leaving anymore and they both knew it. No matter how she felt about him taking off, and no matter how legit a reason, she was upset that he had undermined her authority and he was going to pay for it verbally.

"Why do you always do the opposite of what I tell you to do?" She thundered at him.

Wade laughed loudly. "Because it's fun."

"I swear to God if you let that little boy down, I am going to end you." Carmen promised, putting her finger in Wade's face and then heading for the door. "Now that you've shown yourself, you have to come so how about right now?"

"If I say, 'that's what she said'?" Wade asked her.

Carmen looked at him. "I will hurt you."

"Well then, that's what she said." Wade replied with a wink.

Carmen was amused but she wasn't allowed to show it so she rolled her eyes and walked into the house. Wade followed and they both headed out into the back yard, Chris pushing Mason on the swing set and Logan going to answer the door as more people arrived. Ororo even showed up and Carmen smiled at her, glad to see that even though it wasn't exactly a date, she was willing to do things like come to a birthday party for a pseudo nephew with Logan.

"He wants to tap that." Wade said nodding.

Carmen rolled her eyes and elbowed him in the ribs. "If Mason picks up on that term, I'm letting Logan fulfill his threat—in fact I'm glad I have Logan on speed dial because the threat could be used for a lot."

"You know you don't really want him to follow through on that." Wade told her shrugging. "You'd never forgive yourself."

"I'd be able to sleep at night." Carmen replied with a smug smile, heading into the kitchen to get some more snacks to bring out for the kids who were showing up.

Wade sighed loudly and followed her into the house, Carmen sighing as well because she wanted him to leave her alone. She didn't trust him, and she didn't trust his true reasons for being there, and it didn't help that he was dressed nice and he smelled fantastic. No…no that was just the loneliness talking. That was just the loneliness and for some reason the way that scar made her miss the old times, no matter how mad she was with him—no matter how many times she told herself that she hated him.

"Why do you have to still be here?" She asked in an aggravated voice, and heading towards the stairs to go upstairs when Chris came in and took the snacks from her, Wade just leaning against the wall watching her.

Chris nudged him before heading out through the back, deck door. "Stop being so aggressive with my sister, please? I thought that you gave me this whole speech earlier about how you were going to beg for forgiveness—about how you were going to admit you were wrong. Damn-it! I should have known that you were lying and that was too good to be true. Saying it again out loud makes me feel stupid for believing you."

"Tell Mason I'll be right there." Wade said rolling his eyes and heading for the stairs.

He didn't know exactly what he was going to do, but he knew that he had to talk to Carmen because this wasn't good for Mason. Wade had never really sat down to think what was best for son before, but he knew that if he and Carmen argued all the time, Mason wasn't going to be a happy and that was going to make Carmen even more disagreeable and in turn make Wade even more annoyed with her. There it was again—Wade thinking about himself…but at least he had just noticed it.

"This is my room, Wade!" Carmen told him as she grabbed a different pair of shoes to wear, just to keep herself busy and not thinking about Wade.

Wade rolled his eyes and crossed over to her, kissing her when she turned around to yell at him. He expected her to push him off when she did, but he hadn't expected her to kiss him back for a moment right before pushing him off. Their eyes met and she opened her mouth to protest, finding his lips back on hers and pushing him off again, only kissing him back just a little longer and cursing herself for doing so.

"What do you think you're doing?" She asked him, completely flustered. "We have to go back downstairs and outside."

Wade shook his head. "For once in your life, Car…just stop talking."

"Wade—" Carmen tried, but she gave in when Wade kissed her again.

His lips were so warm and he was kissing her like he actually cared for just a moment before Carmen felt his hands. He was on the move for her shirt, helping her out of it and surprised she was still letting him touch her, but she wasn't surprised—she'd missed the touch of a man. Wade hadn't been the only man that she'd been with, but at the same time she hadn't been with anyone since Wade and this felt so nice, especially when the zipper on her jeans came down and she felt Wade's fingers slip into her pants.

"Car?" Wade asked softly.

Carmen just shook her head and kissed him again, biting his bottom lip and spreading her legs a little more, whimpering pleasantly when she felt Wade's fingers slip past her underwear and push inside of her. He wanted to make the experience last for her, and she didn't mind, moving her hips up and tugged on his hair a little stopping him and getting the two of them stripped down, Wade's lips finding her neck, sucking on her skin.

Wade was pretty certain that Carmen was now on auto-pilot, not really realizing what she was doing and he should stop, but he wanted it. It was too late—her hand was running down his body to his aching member and once she touched it, he wasn't stopping either. This was going to happen and neither of them could stop it, nor did they want to in the moment as she ran her hand up and down him, hissing softly when he but the soft flesh next to her collarbone, grunting and moving himself against her hand.

"Wade, I missed you." Carmen puffed out, letting out a sound of protest as he took her hands and pinned them above her head, his eyes blazing with lust into hers as he rubbed his length against her between her legs. "Jesus, Wade…"

Wade chuckled and rubbed a little harder. "It's good to see you again, Car."

"I still hate you." Carmen told him before she pressed her lips to his and angled her hips, rocking them up and letting out a muffled cry into his mouth when they merged.

Wade rocked against her as he kissed her passionately, their hips moving in time like old times, Wade having to battle Carmen's for dominance and she tried to take over. In order to subdue her, Wade quickened his pace and massaged Carmen's inner thighs, knowing that whatever happened he was going to make her topple over the edge first, which she did, biting Wade's shoulder as the pleasure hit her forcefully. Carmen ran her hands along Wade as he continued to move against her, finding his sac and applying a painfully pleasant pressure to it until he found his release too.

They made eye contact again and then Wade stroked her hair as he pulled out, running his nose along hers and Carmen was confused. It was almost like her whole world was flooding back to her, but at the same time Wade was being…affectionate. He kissed her gently and cradled her, stroking her hair softly and kissing her like he cared. Wade had felt a little bit of the old times and though he hadn't admitted anything to her verbally, he felt like she was almost his again, and he just held her, running his hands and lips along her, wondering how long it would last, amazed and glad she was doing the same back.


"Son of a bitch!" Carmen exclaimed as she opened up her eyes and saw the clock and realized she'd been sleeping. "Damn-it, I knew something like this was going to—"

Carmen stopped talking as soon as she realized that she was by herself in the bed, getting up hurriedly and getting dressed. She had only dozed off for an hour and a half, but that would be enough to make Mason suspicious. It was his birthday and she was supposed to be there for him every step of the way—not sleeping with his father who had walked out on both of them after trying to tell her not to have him in the first place.

"I am going to kill him." Carmen said shaking her head and hurrying down the stairs after running a brush through her hair.

Mason hurried over to his mother when he saw her come outside and flash him a smile. "There you are, Momma! Are you feeling better?"

"Feeling better?" Carmen asked her, a confused smile on her face as she knealt down to come face to face with her son, looking up at Wade as he put his hand on Mason's shoulder and giving him a look.

"Daddy told me you weren't feeling very well." Mason explained to her. "I told them we had to wait on cake and presents until you felt better."

Carmen smiled at him and Eskimo-kissed his nose. "That was very sweet of you, Buddy. How about we do presents now?"

Mason nodded vigorously and then Carmen stood up and he grasped her hand, pulling her over the presents table and calling out to his friends and all the other guests. Carmen was a little surprised at how excited Mason was to be near his father, but even more surprised to see Wade putting forth an effort. She'd never seen him do this before…and yet for some reason it really didn't change anything—she still didn't trust him.

"So what are you going to do now, Car?" Chris asked her, opening up his arms and kissing the top of her head when she leaned into him.

Carmen shrugged a little. "I don't know…do you know?"

"Yeah, I know—Logan does too, and he wants to give you a piece of his mind, but I'm your actual flesh and blood, so I told him it was my place." Chris said with a laugh.

"Thanks, Chris. I know how Logan is when he gets all upset." Carmen said laughing, and then she focused attention on Mason as he showed her excitedly the presents that he was getting.

Logan stroked Carmen's hair. "You have yourself in quite the predicament."

"No I don't, Logan." Carmen replied shaking her head. "Just because I slept with him doesn't mean he's staying."

"And if he wants to?" Logan asked her.

Carmen glanced at him and took a deep breath, looking back at Mason and smiling, heading over to the table and making a list of the toys and who gave them to him so he could make 'thank you' cards. When the party was winding down and all of the kids had been picked up and taken home, Mason asked if Wade could tuck him into bed and Carmen reluctantly let him. It took Chris and Logan keeping her in the kitchen to stop her from following them and she wasn't happy—she wanted to know what was being said.

"Why'd you leave Momma?" Mason asked as he crawled into the bed in his pajamas, Wade sitting on the side of the bed feeling slightly uncomfortable—he wasn't used to this and he didn't know how to deal with kids…he'd never wanted them in the first place.

Wade shrugged softly as Mason snuggled into his pillows and covers. "Your mom and I had different plans for the future, Mason. I had things to do and she wanted to give you a better life."

"Is it true you didn't want me? Uncle Logan said you didn't want me—he said you were scared and Mom wanted me so she left you." Mason explained, looking at Wade with big, hopeful eyes. "I won't be mad if you didn't. Momma says that everyone gets scared and that as a whole you're decent."

"Wow…you sure you're only five?" Wade joked, laughing a little as Mason laughed and nodded. "Your mom and I needed our space and you grew up better here without me."

Mason nodded slowly and then Wade took a deep breath and stood up, looking down at his son and then going towards the door. He looked back at him when he heard Mason ask him if he was going to stick around and Wade smiled sadly. Wade was starting to wonder what he had just got himself into and when Mason mentioned the spare bedroom, Wade didn't know what to do.

"I can talk to your mother about it." Wade said, and then he turned off the light, looking at the glow of the night light. "Goodnight, Mason."

Mason nodded at him. "Goodnight, Daddy."

Wade left the room, shutting the door behind him and then looking at it and shaking his head slowly. He knew for a fact that Carmen wasn't going to let him stay after everything she had put him through—especially since even though they had disbanded, Stryker could still call on them at any moment. After everything that he had done…he couldn't just ignore Stryker's call and that was the one place where he and Carmen always differed.

"Why would he want to stay, Logan?" Carmen asked as Wade came down the stairs, putting some dirty dishes into the dishwasher. "He never wants to stay and that's why I didn't want him around Mason. It was bad enough when he just did it to me but he has a son—a son who still believes in the beauty and innocence of the world!"

Logan ran his hand down his face. "This may be true, Car, but come on…you slept with him. You need to at least admit to yourself that part of you misses him—part of you wants him to stick around and be part of your life. Don't you owe Mason that?"

"Of course I do!" Carmen exclaimed, sighing and leaning on the sink, shaking her head. "I wanted Wade to be there with Mason from the moment that he was born. I wanted Wade around to feel my stomach when Mason kicked, go to my OBGYN appointments, hold my hand while Mason came out, shop for baby supplies for me, teach him how to talk and walk, go with me to take him to his first day of preschool—I wanted a lot from him but Wade didn't want it. He told me flat out that he wasn't going to be a dad and I wasn't going to force him. He made his choice, Logan, and I'm not going to forgive him for what he did."

"We get that, Car." Chris said, rubbing her back. "We're just saying that that was six years ago and these are different times. We're not all mercenaries anymore—not all of us could get out as easily as you could."

Wade cleared his throat and everyone looked at him. "If you don't mind, Mason asked me to stay in the guest room tonight and I'd like to."

Carmen nodded slowly. "I can make up the couch for you."

With that she left the kitchen and Wade just sighed and put his hands on his hips, looking at the floor and shaking his head. Logan, Carmen and Chris knew that he had heard the whole conversation and they didn't know if they had the right to talk about it all anymore. There was really no reason why they shouldn't talk to him, but they didn't know what was up with Carmen right then and they were there for her—they weren't there to patch her back up with Wade.

"Try thinking more with your brain than your urges." Chris told Wade as he shook his head. "I don't think your little tryst with my sister made anything better."

Logan grabbed his jacket. "I'll be back in the morning to help get Mason ready for his meeting with Xavier—don't fuck up, Wade."

"I'm going to try not to." Wade said honestly, and he headed out into the living room as Chris and Logan left the house, locking the door behind them and looking at Carmen. "Couch looks comfy."

"I hope not." Carmen replied and then she sighed. "Sorry, I just…I can't believe I let that happen before."

Wade reached out and took her hand. "You don't have to regret it, Carmen—it doesn't have to mean anything. It was just us getting out some frustration and that's it…we don't have to even bring it up again."

Carmen just nodded and handed him a pillow, trying hard not to make eye contact with him and yet stopping at the bottom of the stairs as Wade sat on the couch and took off his shirt. She looked at him and she bit her lip, running her fingers through her hair and then making eye contact with him when he looked at her. He had new scars and she wanted to ask about them, but her heart hurt so much thinking about everything that had happened between them—how could she just forget it all? Six years or not, he broke her heart and she couldn't forgive him yet.

"You're welcome to have breakfast and go to see Xavier with us in the morning." Carmen told him with a shrug. "You've made an impression on Mason and he'd probably feel better with you there."

Wade smiled a little and nodded. "I'll think about it."

"Okay…goodnight, Wade." Carmen said softly, heading up the stairs.

"Goodnight, Car." Wade replied, and then he laid down and pulled the blanket up, closing his eyes and wondering how he was going to get through this when all he could think about was how wonderful it had been to feel her again.

Note: You may think that things are fixed between them, but then that would mean that you didn't know me or my writing, haha. The next chapter has more flashbacks, and it has a new development as well. Feedback is always appreciated!