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Disclaimer: SM owns Twilight
"I don't want to hear another word about it!" Charlie yelled, slamming his fist down on the kitchen table. I jumped at the loud noise. "You're going, and that's that!"
I gritted my teeth, knowing it wouldn't do any good to continue protesting. When Charlie was this determined about something, there wasn't much anybody could do to change his mind.
After Charlie walked in on the mess we had created out of the living room, he was furious. It took a while for us to calm him down, and when he did, he kicked Jasper and Alice out so that he could "talk" to us. His talking closely resembled yelling though...
When he started losing steam, he finally noticed my bandaged hand and he slipped into the concerned parent role. I couldn't exactly lie about what happened, since I completely suck at lying, and Jake wasn't coming to my rescue. He kept shooting me those annoyingly sympathetic looks, but he was keeping his mouth shut. So, I had no other option but to tell Charlie the truth.
To say he was shocked would be a huge understatement. I expected for him to yell and for his face to turn that sickly purple color like it normally did when he was angry. What I didn't anticipate was for him to sink into his chair at the kitchen table with a heavy sigh, looking like he had aged ten years in those few moments. He hadn't spoken for several minutes, but when he did, his voice sounded tired.
"Bella," Charlie said in a strained tone. "What happened last year must have been horrible for you. Hell, it was horrible for me too! I never want to get another phone call telling me one of my kids is in the hospital again." His voice took on a gruff quality.
He scrubbed his hands down his face and released a long sigh, before looking back up at me again. I was starting to get nervous with the way he was looking at me.
"I thought those pills would help you handle this better," he continued. "But I can see now that you aren't dealing with this properly." I opened my mouth to protest, even though I knew what he was saying was true, but he held up a hand to stop me from saying anything.
"I think it's time you saw someone." I raised an eyebrow. Did he honestly think me seeing another doctor would get different results? I had seen so many that I had lost count of them. "I'm talking about a therapist, Bells," He clarified.
I balked at that, not believing what I was hearing. I spluttered for a few moments, before I was able to form a complete thought.
"You want me to see a SHRINK?" I asked in a deceptively calm voice. "I'm not crazy!"
I was starting to get angry. So what if I punched a mirror? I'm sure I wasn't the only one to ever do that… Right? Charlie leaned back in his chair and folded his hands across his stomach in his "I'm not going to budge on this" position.
"I'm not saying you are," he said. "But you need to talk to someone and not keep this all bottled up like you have been doing—"
"But I did talk about it," I butted in hastily, "to Alice and Jasper." His weary expression morphed into one of shock. He turned to Jake for confirmation.
"She did," Jake said with a slight smile. "She didn't even need her pills." Charlie turned back to me with an amazed look on his face.
"That's great Bells!" He enthused. "But even so, I think this could really help you." I groaned and dropped my head onto my arms that were resting on the table.
"I'm dealing with this just fine," I mumbled into my arms.
"Yeah, I can see that," he said sarcastically, obviously thinking about my damaged hand and the broken mirror in the upstairs bathroom. I lifted my head back up to meet his eyes.
"Dad—" I started, throwing in my infamous pout for good measure. He shook his head and looked away, clearly not wanting to be influenced by my puppy dog eyes.
"No Bells, you're going. End of discussion." His tone rang with a sense of finality, but I wasn't having it. I violently jumped up from the table, causing my chair to scrape loudly against the kitchen tile.
"This is fucking ridiculous!" I shouted, throwing my hands up in the air for emphasis.
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Jake's eyes widen. I was completely shocked by what just flew out of my mouth as well. I never talked to my parents this way, and definitely didn't swear in front of them. Apparently Charlie had had enough of my behavior and declared in a loud, stern voice that I was going and there wasn't anything I could do to change his mind.
End of flashback
I clenched my jaw to prevent myself from releasing the shitload of curses that wanted to fly out of my mouth. That would probably just cause more harm than good. So, after Charlie called the psychiatrist's office to set up my appointment, it was settled. I would be going to see a shrink on Monday after school got out. Just fucking great.
"You're quiet today," Alice chirped, nudging my shoulder playfully. "Is something wrong?" I blinked and looked up at Alice who was looking at me with obvious concern.
It was now Monday, the dreaded day when I would have to meet the shrink after school let out, and I couldn't think of much else all morning. I had no idea what to expect from this appointment, and was undoubtedly anxious about it. The fact that cheerleading tryouts were also today at lunch, only added to my jumbled thoughts. I wouldn't be surprised if my brain suddenly exploded from all of this over thinking I was doing.
Alice and I had just gotten out of our pre-calc class and were making our way to our lockers. She had tried to engage me in conversation as we walked, so I would throw in an occasional "uh-huh" or "that's cool" without listening to what she was saying. Apparently she noticed my distracted state of mind and felt the need to question me about it.
"Everything's fine," I muttered, giving her a small smile. She raised an eyebrow disbelievingly.
"Bella, has anyone ever told you that you suck at lying?"
"Hey!" I protested. She laughed at my response. But then she grew serious again.
"Spill," she demanded. I sighed, closing and locking my locker before turning back to her.
"Ok fine," I conceded. I looked around to make sure no one was within earshot. There were only a few stragglers hanging around before their next classes would begin. I turned back to her and leaned in conspiratorially.
"My dad's making me see a shrink today after school," I explained quietly. "And I can't seem to think of anything else. Sorry that I've been kinda distracted. Guess I'm just nervous." Alice nodded sympathetically. "Oh and not to mention the cheerleading tryouts today!" She dismissed this concern with a wave of her hand.
"So I take it you have no choice in seeing this psychiatrist?" Alice asked in the same soft tone. I laughed humorlessly.
"Is it that obvious?"
"Well, if you had any say in this, I don't think you'd be this worried over going." She shrugged as she finished.
"True," I agreed. "I wish I could just skip it, but Charlie would probably find out—" I trailed off in dejection.
"Yeah, he probably would. But hey, maybe this will actually help you," she offered. I groaned and shook my head exasperatedly.
"You're starting to sound like Charlie." She laughed and rolled her eyes.
"You might as well give it a try," she said with a shrug.
"Doesn't look like I have much of a choice," I muttered back. She gave me a small smile.
"Now as for the tryouts, I know you'll do great! We've been going over your routine so much, that I'm sure you could do it backwards," she reasoned. "So don't worry so much about it!"
I opened my mouth to tell her that it was easy for her to say. She was one of the judges and didn't have to worry over trying out, but at that moment, she saw something over my shoulder that caused her to smile widely.
"Jasper! Over here!" Alice yelled, waving her hands in the air to get his attention.
I spun around and sure enough, Jasper had spotted us from his position by his locker, and was making his way over. I bit my lip nervously as I watched him heading our way. I hadn't spoken to him since last night when I told Alice and Jasper about what happened in Phoenix and Charlie kicking them out, so I didn't know how he would act around me from now on.
I hoped he wouldn't put on the kiddie gloves and treat me like I could break at any second. That was the one thing I hated back in Phoenix. After the accident, people (even some of my friends and teachers) treated me like I was a fragile piece of rare china. I didn't know why I was so worried that Jasper would react the same way, but for some reason I was. Alice was apparently not treating me any differently, but I couldn't assume Jasper would be the same.
I couldn't help but appreciate the view as he ambled over to us. I mean, the guy was sex on legs! If he noticed me secretly eye-fucking him, he didn't show it. He smiled at us as he stopped beside us. I swear I nearly swooned because of that smile… The effect that guy has on me is almost embarrassing!
"How are my two favorite girls?" Jasper asked, squeezing in between the two of us and slinging his arms around both of our shoulders, tucking us into his sides.
Alice laughed, while I blushed. I couldn't help but feel relieved though. He seemed to slip back into his calm and carefree demeanor. I smiled at that thought.
"You better not let Rose hear you saying that," Alice said in a faux serious tone, raising an eyebrow as she strained to look up at him. He chuckled and shook his head.
"Nah, Rose is in a different category altogether."
"That's true," Alice agreed with a nod, before ducking out from underneath Jasper's arm. "Well, I need to get going to my next class. It's on the opposite side of the building," she explained. But, I could detect a hint of a smirk as she stared at the two of us. That's odd.
"Remember Bella, don't worry about the tryouts. You'll be great!" she called over her shoulder.
I hoped she was right about that. I mean, she did work my ass off every day after school to perfect the routine I would be performing in front of the "judges." These judges consisted of Alice (the captain), Lauren (the assistant captain), Bree and Kate (other members of the squad without a leadership position who I hadn't met yet), and Mrs. Denali (the coach).
Breaking out of my thoughts, I realized that Jasper still had his arm around my shoulders. I blushed at this realization.
"I should probably head to my next class too," I said quietly as I stared up at him. He raised his eyebrows in confusion.
"Isn't your next class right there?" He asked, gesturing with his free arm towards the door of the classroom a little ways ahead of us.
I blushed a deeper shade of red when I realized he was right. But, I kind of wanted a reason to distance myself from him. My brain seemed to turn to goo whenever he was in close proximity to me.
"Uh yeah," I cleared my throat nervously. "But Mrs. Hernandez can be kinda strict when we aren't in our seats when the bell rings." My excuse sounded lame even to my own ears.
"Live a little," he said good-naturedly. "Hey, I was meaning to ask you if you wanted to see Scream 4 Friday night. It's the first night it's going to be out." I wanted to scream "YES" at the top of my lungs, but held back just barely.
"Sure, that sounds fun," I said, and then wanted to hit myself upside the head for replying with such a generic response.
"Cool," he smiled down at me, but we were soon interrupted.
"Hey, stop hogging Bella," a deep voice said, startling me slightly. Jasper glanced up and frowned. That's a weird response to have…
I looked up as well, and when I saw Edward and James, I gave them a friendly smile. I was starting to get a little uncomfortable with the way James was staring at me. It was almost predatory.
"So Bella," James smirked. "I was wondering if I could talk to you for a moment." He eyed Jasper's arm that was still around my shoulders. "Alone," he emphasized.
Jasper and Edward stared at him with narrowed eyes. I was definitely starting to feel like something wasn't right… What was up with the guys in Forks anyway? I didn't have long to contemplate that because the one minute bell rang, signaling for us to hurry up and get to class. I nearly sighed in relief.
"Uh, I should actually get to class," I said with what I hoped looked like an apologetic smile. I ducked out from under Jasper's arm, gave them a small wave, and walked the short distance to my class.
"Smooth," I heard Edward laugh, probably thinking I couldn't hear him as I pulled open the door to the classroom.
"Shut up," James snapped, sounding supremely annoyed. "If that stupid Bell hadn't rung…"
My forehead creased at the conversation they were having, but the door shut behind me and prevented me from hearing anymore. Now I had something else to think about. Just what I needed.
I tried to shake these thoughts off, but had little success. Between worrying about seeing the shrink after school, having to try out for the cheerleading team at lunch, and with what I just overheard, my brain felt like it would burst due to information overload. I could picture the headlines now:
"Local high school student's brain explodes from thinking too much."
I slumped into my seat with these thoughts swirling around my head. I barely paid attention to Jessica and Mike as they talked about some trip a few people were going to be taking to the beach at La Push, some nearby reservation that happened to be a popular hangout spot. I might have even accidentally agreed to go with them at some point, when I was lost in my own thoughts.
The next two classes flew by, and before I knew it, it was lunchtime. I couldn't help but drag my feet as I headed to the gym for the tryouts. I just hoped that I didn't completely mess it up, or fall flat on my face. Although, I could definitely picture something embarrassing like that happening to me… I took a deep breath as I reached the gym. It was now or never… With another deep breath, I pushed open the double doors, dreading what was to come.
AN: I tried to get this out yesterday, but some things came up, so it's out a day late. Sorry about that! I honestly tried…
If you haven't already seen it, there is a poll on my profile. I wanted to see which story you all want me to focus more on, so if you have a minute, please go vote. I won't be giving up on any of my stories, but whichever one wins will have my main focus.
Also, I am starting to put on my profile which story I am currently working on and the date it should be posted. So if any of you want to know, you can find that on my profile.
Please review and let me know what you think!