SM owns it all.
Okay...I think the story is finished and until I find a suitable epilogue, I'll add different POVs. This is part one of EPOV since I haven't updated in two weeks and I have to update for my reader. Next part will come in a week on the next update.
Edward's POV (part 1)
I can't believe I am going to him for this. But I can't find the other candy doctor. It definitely runs in family.
My pen stilled midair when I heard Barbara's ridiculous thoughts. It was my first attempt at playing doctor and I wasn't sure how Carlisle could like this. It was much harder for me since I could hear their thoughts. It wasn't the best scenario to work on a stitch when the patient cried in their head about bleeding.
Barbara reached my door and knocked. I hope I look presentable. Oh no, have I applied the lip-gloss?
I rolled my eyes and sighed. "Come in," I said loudly.
"Doctor Cullen, I'm sorry to intrude but I was looking for Doctor Cullen…I mean, your brother, you know?" Of course, he knows, idiot!
"He is free today, Barbara. Can I assist you in anything?"
"He gave me the files from the third floor and a nurse found something wrong in a quantity of an injection."
"I'm sure she is mistaken," I told her, fighting the urge to roll my eyes. Carlisle wrong? Since when?
"I assure you, doctor. You can see it for yourself." She handed me the file.
After my first glance, I realized at least a dozen mistakes for the poor patient and the writing. "It isn't Carlisle's writing, Barbara. And he is in charge for Amanda."
"Oh. Then who…?"
"Why don't you find out who did this while I go home and tell him to come to work?" I asked her, getting up.
"Of course, Doctor Cullen." Oh how I wish he'd show some interest.
I muttered a goodbye since it wasn't in my nature to be rude and flew from my office. Would they ever grasp that some people aren't outgoing? I was sure that was a poor word choice, but it would have to do. I had never shown interest in the opposite sex, I had dodged too many advances from human and vampire women alike…well, with one sole exception. The one I had persuaded and then abandoned.
Was it possible for my dead heart to break? I was sure that it was already broken from my decision all those years ago. I had always lied since it was in my nature to lie, I had to lie to mingle, but that horrendous lie I had told Bella…that overstepped every limit. I had even abandoned my family when we left Forks, it was too hard being close to them. Alice, bless her, kept her promise and stayed out of Bella's future. I very nearly went back to Forks on a few occasions, but always talked myself out of it. She deserved a normal, human life. Two years ago, I ran into Emmett in Montana and he dragged me back to the family. He was worried about me and that equated the end of the world. Everyone fussed around me for a few months, Carlisle even made a hunting schedule for me. That had earned the first laugh I had let out since I had left my Bella. I knew that my decision to kill myself wasn't going to work since I knew Carlisle's story, but it was worth a try. Starving didn't do anything but weaken me and to my surprise, made me skinnier, as if losing weight. Last Christmas, I wanted to break all the connection with Bella and begged Alice to go back and retrieve the hidden objects. I hoped she would find them, because if she didn't…that meant Bella had found them and there were going to be complications. She returned them to me and I spent days locked in my room, on the bed (thanks to Alice), looking through the pictures and everything that had been under the board. They all smelled like her, still.
Then it was time for them to move again and I tagged along, realizing that I had grown used to live around them for so many decades that I couldn't change that. We had to vote between New York, Seattle and Minneapolis. I chose the third option before Carlisle finished talking, Jasper agreed with me and Alice nodded enthusiastically. Rosalie was the only one to want New York, but I understood her to some extent. If Chicago had been an option, I would have chosen my birth city, too. Esme promised her that New York would be next, after Minneapolis.
I parked in front of the cottage, because this house was more like a cottage. Esme had amazing taste in decorating houses. I could smell a faint strain of freesias, but my memories were still fresh.
Why is he back? I didn't see this! I frowned at Alice's thoughts then my hand froze on the door handle as I saw where Emmett was looking. At whom, more exactly.
I entered the house as thoughts bombarded me. Bella was there, really there. She had befriended the dogs when we left. Victoria had come back after her, as well as Laurent. She had made up her life – that one hurt more than I ever imagined. She had a boyfriend and I was sure that Alice had the imagines mixed up in her head. This boyfriend of Bella's couldn't look like that…lime me.
"Carlisle, you should go back. Barbara wanted to see you about the files you gave her." I couldn't believe my eyes. Bella was truly there.
There she was, on the couch next to Rose and Emmett. Her hair was a little shorter but the same beautiful mahogany color, her eyes the same beautiful chocolate shade, her cheeks the same pink I remembered them. And oh, her scent sent me reeling, her heart became rapidly my favorite song, again. I had been such an idiot.
Stay and talk with her, don't run. Ah, Esme knew all too well.
Oh let the show begin. I bet you ten bucks that you won't have the guts to talk with her. Of course, Emmett, your confidence in me is astounding.
Keep your cool. I think I'll take Alice hunting…you're already feeling too much. I felt bad for Jasper, but I would appreciate the space.
"Let's leave them alone," Carlisle proposed softly.
I had yet to move a muscle. Bella was gaping at me, some sort of disbelief on her face. I was supposed to be working and that's why she was here. She didn't want to see me. She had every right to leave right now, along with my family, but she just stood there, bringing an old sensation of frustration. What was she thinking?
We kept staring at each other after my family left. Could see at least five different emotions play on her face, in her eyes, but she never voice any of them. Suddenly, just as I had made up my courage to utter a word, her phone started ringing. The song brought me to reality. She truly belonged to someone else, she loved this other guy that had looked a lot like me in Alice's head. Was that possible? And how was that possible? Family…of mine?
I watched Bella' cheeks filling with blood as she answered her phone just as her brown eyes settled on mine. They were swirling with hurt and embarrassment.
"Hi, love!" the boy from the other end of the line greeted her. It was true. They loved each other.
"Hey!" Bella acknowledged. It didn't escape me that she didn't return the word or some other nickname.
"Are you coming with me to Chicago for the game away?" When she didn't answer, he added hastily. "We can stay at the hotel where the team would be staying or with my family."
Bella closed her eyes and I wondered if it hurt her being here with me…talking with him…
"Home," she asked somewhat annoyed. "You mean?"
"That." I heard him laughing. It was a secret between them, of course.
"When is this again?" she inquired, opening her eyes again. I remember when she had told me a long time ago about me dazzling her…but right now, she was dazzling me with her intense gaze.
"Next weekend. So… Friday night, we're leaving."
"I'll think about it. I still have to work on my thesis. To start it."
Of course, she was terminal year, her thesis year…about to start her life and here I was, interrupting it again.
"Haven't you- Why can't you take your laptop with you?"
"Robert!" And we have a name to the face. "I'll think about it."
"If this is about leaving me alone with them, you don't have to worry. I'll spend plenty of time with my family. Please, Bella?"
I saw her expression soften so she couldn't say no to the pleading. I fought my smile that threatened to explode on my face.
"I'll tell you tomorrow. I ehh don't think I'm coming back tonight. I haven't seen Alice in some time." She wanted to stay? With Alice, not you. But Alice wasn't here. I tried to search Bella's eyes and see what was in her beautiful mind, but as always, she was a mystery.
"Sure," he answered. "How's your hand?" My eyes rounded on her hands and I saw her right wrist in a bandage.
"Alright, thanks to my doctor." She was teasing him.
"Love you," he said softly.
"I love you, too." She closed her eyes as she said it back and if I wasn't mistaken, she was a bit chocked. Oh how I wanted the words directed at me, but I knew that would never happen. I had hurt her beyond repair; I didn't deserve even her eyes on me.
I couldn't stay still for another moment so I moved to her side, too fast for her to see or feel me. I cradled her soft, porcelain face in my hands and gazed in her chocolate depths.
"Bella!" Her name on my lips sounded foreign and her eyes welled up. "Oh Bella!" I murmured as I watched the pain I had caused reflected in her eyes. I brushed her tears away, remembering the salty composure they were made of.
"Edward!" I thought my heart will beat again – just for a moment, as I heard my name fell from her lips. Her eyes wandered over my face, my body, reacquainting with it.
I wanted to have her for me, just for one more day. As selfish as that was, now that I saw her again, I couldn't let go so easily. If only…she'd accept this. I kissed her fragile wrist then knelt in front of her and pressed my forehead on her stomach. Ah her divine smell…I was intoxicated, but I could control all the natural urges. I hadn't forgotten about the restrains, apparently.
"Words cannot express how I feel right now. I don't expect you to want to talk or see me, but please, just today. I am selfish and we both know that. Please just let me be here. Today. I would never bother you again. I see you moved on, what I wanted." Could I get any lower? I was such a horrible person. I knew how weak se was when it came to me begging or just asking a simple thing of her.
"Why? Why, Edward?" Bella asked quietly. I turned my head to look up at her and her beauty stuck me again. How could I hurt such a wonderful person? I was truly going to Hell, for this one if not for the many murders I had committed.
"I am a deplorable creature. I understand that you hate me now."
"I could never hate you!" she shouted hotly. I had forgotten about her little temper. "Just… I need to know, why? Had it all been an act? All those months?"
She had believed the horrendous lie. Just like I wanted. "I've told you countless times how I feel," I explained, not ready to tell her the words. I didn't want to change her mind about the life she had created.
"Feel?" she asked curiously.
"Yes, feel. Present time. Forever is forever, mates are for life. Although, my selfishness knows no bounds. Bella, understand that in the forest… I was scared for your safety. After Jasper… I knew that I had to leave. You were constantly in danger when I was around."
"Such a gentleman."
"At that time, I thought I did the right thing, although a big part of me remained with you, there. I had left my heart with you."
I watched shock appearing on her face then disbelief the she murmured a word. "Lie."
"Yes, Bella. I lied. The most degrading thing I could have done. It broke me to see you like that, but I wanted you safe above everything. I never knew what I'd left behind."
"How do you know? You weren't here when I told them!" she said scandalized, turning red. I smiled ruefully and eyed her amused. Had she forgotten I can read minds?
"Have you forgotten about my ability? They bombarded me with the news."
"You're a doctor?" Just like that, she changed the subject.
"Intern," I whispered. "Don't change the subject."
"I am so angry! I want to hit you, but I know that I'd end up hurt. You are so stupid for someone who claims to know everything and have so many years in background! You've hurt me so much… I don't know… I still want… I missed you so much!"
Her little speech sent me reeling. I never claimed such things and…she had missed me despite everything? How could she? Her frail arms around my neck were like a drop of fresh air or cold water for a man in the desert.
"Sweetheart," I whispered and I hugged her tighter. I ignored everything, the venom in my mouth, the burning sensation in my throat, the red eyed monster in my head. I couldn't believe how this magnificent creature could still want me after everything.
I saw a suspect wound on her throat and asked about it. "What's this? How did you hurt yourself, here?" Only Bella could hurt herself in such a place.
She didn't answer, but blushed, frenzying the demon inside me. I was too close to her and I wasn't yet accustomed to her tantalizing smell, but I reminded myself the old motto, 'mind over matter.'
"Bella?" I tried again. She had prickled my curiosity. "What happened? Why are you blushing?"
"It's a… bite," she said softly. Bite? I looked at the scar then at her. I tried to find some other smell on her, but could find only a human's one and a faint smell of another vampire, but she had been close to my family. They had probably hugged her. "It's not what you think," she added softly. I looked back at her neck, feeling more confused than ever. What else could that be? No animal could have bitten her like that. "Robert… bit me. It's… ehhh… you know… a hickey?" Bella stammered, avoiding my eyes.
"Is it true? What I saw in Alice's head?" I wanted to make sure of everything. He had given her a love bite, something I've always wanted to do and was unable.
"And here I thought that I was the masochist!" I chortled. "Do you love him? Are you in love with him?" It was the trick question and deep down, I knew the answer. I just wanted to hear it from her.
She looked almost panicked for a second, like a deep caught in the headlights then her heart rhythm accelerated as she caught her lip between her teeth and watched me worried.
"Listen to your heart fly. Bella, I can take it. I can see it in your eyes. You love him."
"At the beginning, it was… more the idea of him being related to you, being so similar yet so different. But as time passed, I fell in love. It's nothing compared to what I feel for you. I can't love anyone as much or as blindly. Don't you know that I am unconditionally and irrevocably in love with you?" So he was indeed related to me. I wanted to hear more about that. Now, I had a more pressing question.
"Still? After everything I've put you through?"
"Yes, I don't know how to not love you." She was so sincere and caring. It felt amazing when she touched my hair, but she knew that.
"You will hurt your friend." I stroked my soft cheek. "I'm not going anywhere. I promise."
"You may not, but…" I frowned at that. Was she leaving? I had to remind myself that she had her own life now. "I am nearly as old as Carlisle."
"Oh Bella! Stop this nonsense! If you want the truth, you don't look a day older than how I remember you and trust me, I thought of you a lot." And we were back to where we started. Stubborn Bella. I tried to fight my smile.
"You look changed."
"I'm getting better since I came back," I explained, not ready to have her scold me. "I hadn't fed in some time. Only when I felt too weak to move. I tried to find a way to… kill myself, but nothing worked. I became disgusted with what I had done, but I had promised myself to never interfere with your life."
She looked scandalized and terrified when I finished talking.
"I thought of you constantly! I have no idea how I managed to finish high school. And don't say such things… as suicide. Please, Edward."
"Promise me, you won't say anything to my next words." She nodded solemnly. "I love you." The words flew easily from my mouth and I could feel the sincerity behind them. I watched Bella's reaction, closely. Before I could register she unfroze, she was all over me, kissing me hungrily. The first urge was to push her away, but then I reminded myself that she initiated this and I could at least, tolerate her scent. Because I would lie if I said I didn't want to kiss her.
"I missed you. So much. Oh Bella," I admitted once we separated for her to breathe.
"You're so thin because you didn't feed properly?" Her concern was touching, but I didn't need it.
"I've heard enough of that from Esme. Please, don't say anything," I pleaded her and squeezed her closer to me. "I don't think I'll give you back."
"I never intended for this to happen. I don't want to hurt him."
"I can wait another few months until you finish college. You can say something… invent something."
"Edward, I'm not going to lie to Robert. I will tell him the truth. I just… need some time to think about what to say, how to say it."
"I will wait, as I said," I promised. This time I won't break my promise.
"I appreciate it. It's not like me to… do this." She put her head on my shoulder and sighed. I knew that, that had surprised me the most…but I couldn't deny her when she wanted to kiss me. "I don't think I would have survived the next six months if you wanted to keep us a secret."
"As soon as you finish, I am yours. That's only if you'd want me."
"I will always want you, Edward. Haven't we established that?"
I smiled gratefully and kissed her forehead. "Can we just be? For today?"
"Yes." She offered me her beautiful smile and I didn't need more. If I could only have Bella by my side, I wouldn't need anything else.
"Hungry?" I asked excited. I wanted to cook something for her, to show her that I could take care of her properly.
"We're not leaving the house."
"Of course, not. I'll cook for you." I was so eager and exhilarated to have her around that I moved too fast to the kitchen where I put her on the counter, kissing her lightly. "What would it be?"
"Since when do you cook?" she asked confused.
"I watched Food Network and unfortunately it registered to my mind. Now, I'm happy I watched it."
"That means you'd have to go and watch TV or… find a movie you'd like to watch."
"I'll choose a movie. Where do you keep them?" She jumped off the counter. I was glad I had my eye son her constantly. She could have injured herself.
"Walk the corridor to your right and you'd find my name on the door," I explained. The door name had been Esme's fabulous idea. There had been so many changes when I returned to them.
"I see how you're gonna be this time." What was that supposed to mean? "Last time, you were nervous when you showed me your room then you got all playful, nearly eating me."
"Alice and Jasper were under the impression that I was eating you when I was merely showing you how dangerous I am." I chuckled and took her hand, leading her to my room. "Do you want an encore?"
"I may get lost on the way to your room." Ah my little Bella could play coy. We walked quietly to my room where I did my best to relive the awkward moment from my old room in Forks.
"Umm this is my room," I muttered. everything was the same as she knew it besides the bed.
"A bed?" she wondered.
"Uhh yeah. Alice's fabulous idea," I explained embarrassed. She knew why we used beds, I had explained her. What must she think now?
"I'll look for a movie. Go and surprise me with the food."
I smiled and kissed her again then went back to the kitchen. I decided to cook pastas since she loved them and put some broccoli since I heard it was good then fried bacon. After some time when I was nearly done, I heard Bella outside the kitchen's door.
"It's a surprise so you will have to wait a few more minutes!" I said loudly, imagining her face when the door wouldn't open.
I found her in the living room when I was done, she was watching the pictures. Esme's idea, again. I don't think we ever put pictures on display, but they had changed since my departure.
"I was wondering where you disappeared," I said lowly as I stopped behind her. I wanted to wrap her in my arms, but maybe that was too much. "I think I've told you about Esme, haven't I?" She nodded. "Then you must recognize the person next to her."
"What were you doing to that cat?" she asked amused, turning to my picture.
"I don't remember, but I seem to be teasing her." I couldn't stop the natural urge to wrap her in my arms. "Let's go, feed you."
We watched the movie in relative silence and I could feel the embarrassment rolling in waves off her. She had no idea how the movie was. I allowed her to go deposit of the plate. Not two minutes after she left the room, I heard her heart beating wildly then she screamed.
I was beside her in a matter of seconds. When I saw her impediment, I couldn't help but chuckle. "You met Marty."
"Yes. Marty, the green iguana, is Emmett's pet," I explained, rolling my eyes. "Don't panic, he's inoffensive." That had been one of the many shocks I had when I moved back with them then there was Alice's Chinchilla.
"Should I expect other things?" she asked frightened.
I wanted to say no but there was the Alice's pet.
"Are you scared of small rodents?" I asked seriously. Humans could be scared of the most dubious things.
"A mouse?" she yelled. Okay, she was scared of rodents, but maybe she won't be of the Chinchilla.
"Not really. Rose and Alice found her some time ago. Alice told me about the first meeting, it's boring. She is cute."
"Edward, what are you talking about?"
"Come." I led her to Alice's room where the cage was.
"Is it a rat?"
"I'm sure you just would her ego. It's a Chinchilla, Bella." I couldn't help but laugh at her expression.
"You mean the one that has expensive fur?"
"Since when do you keep pets?"
"I wouldn't know. It was as much of a shock for me as it is for you. Alice wasn't very original about naming the poor animal, but the name stuck. She's Sweets."
I decided to finish the movie and after locking Marty in Emmett's room, I took Bella in my arms and went to my room. I hadn't felt this alive – if I could say that – since I had left Forks.
I hope you liked Edward's pov. Next part will be the Christmas in Chicago and the only time they had been together and conceived the baby.
Review. I am really sorry for the delay.