Disclaimer: Joss is Boss. No money was made from this and no copyright infringement is intended. Any similarity to any other story not my own is coincidence.
Title: Un Dia Llegara
Rating: PG; rated for general concepts
Timeline: Sometime between "You're Welcome" and "Not Fade Away"
Author's Note: Un dia llegara translates as "one day it will come."
"Amor Fati" loosely translates as "love of fate." It is the acceptance, some would say almost fatalistic acceptance, that everything happens for a reason, and instead of fighting that, it is within a person's power to work with it as a necessary part of life; to embrace it. It can also mean that everything happens, eventually. Of course, I'm only loosely using the concept here and I seriously doubt that Nietzsche would ever recognize it as I use it in this story.*grin*
Also, this is indeed a re-post
~The dry leaves will fall, and when April arrives, You will touch my soul.
You will approach... will come for me.
After so much solitude, I want to feel...
To find my peace in you~
"Un Dia Llegara" ~ Josh Groban
Angel watched almost dispassionately as the fitful Los Angeles rain easily tore through the cherry blossoms above him. Already, several of the delicate blooms lay broken in the grass around his feet, victims of the rare spring shower. He supposed that there might have been a poem in the image, something Spike, in his days as William, would have made into melancholy Victorian verse; Angel could only bow his head and let the pink petals fall.
"We all fall down," he murmured with the ghost of a breath before stepping back until the trunk of the tree became a solid presence behind him. Angel felt it brace him like a slender column and wished, almost violently, that it was a woman instead.
But it was no use wishing, he was still alone in the LA night, the rain falling down as heedlessly on him as it did the cherry blossoms. Still, if he couldn't wish, he could pray.
"Cordy..." he breathed.
It was the only prayer he knew, and she was the only one he ever prayed to anyway.
"Damn, Cordy... I..."
Angel sank into a pained crouch, burying his face into his weary hands.
"Fall down without you," he confessed, his voice muffled into near silence.
He suddenly felt a gentle hand quietly brushing petals from the wet strands of his hair, but didn't dare look up for fear of disrupting the impossible moment. Instead, he removed his hands from his face and settled them on his knees. Quietly, he breathed in the unexpectedly sweet scent of rain, cherry blossoms, and... her.
Angel closed his eyes and willed the moment to be more than real, he willed it to be true.
"I'm right here..."
Petals fell before his eyes and Angel finally dared to look up, watching as Cordelia released the gathered fragments of the flowers from her fingertips.
"Cordy..." It was more than a prayer, it was his was soul recognizing his heart. "Cordy..."
"Hey there, Champ," she said softly, reaching out a hand to gently chase a raindrop down Angel's cheek. He closed his eyes, savoring the nearly overwhelming sensation.
"If seeing is believing," she nearly whispered.
After only a moment's hesitation, Angel reached out, bringing Cordelia into the circle of his arms and holding her in an embrace that was almost a shade too tight.
"And if feeling is..." she continued. "Though, if you don't ease up there a little, Big Guy, I'm afraid that I'm going to lose that in everything but my toes."
His embrace eased ever so slightly, hesitant to let go even that much, and Cordelia laughed just a little.
"I miss you..." Angel whispered into the warmth of her neck, the sound muffled as his lips brushed against her skin.
"Me too..." she breathed into his ear. "Me too, Angel..."
"I don't know if I can do this without you," he confessed quietly.
"Oh, Champ..." Cordelia sighed.
"And don't tell me that you're always with me, because..."
"Because it's not true," he insisted in an almost harsh whisper. "It's just not true."
Gently, Cordelia slid her hands up to cradle Angel's head. With an inexorable gentleness, she forced his dark eyes to look into her own.
"You're not here with me, and I'm falling down without you," he asserted in the same sort of rough whisper. "I need you with me."
"I know, Champ..." she whispered. "I know."
"You left me... Oh, God, Cordy you left me. Why did you leave me?"
Cordelia gave him a sad, soft smile in response before brushing her lips lightly against his, the sensation tantalizing in its sweetness, like a cherry blossom caressing his skin.
"Why?" He murmured against her lips.
"Amor fati," she whispered in reply, her breath warm in his own as it slipped from her lips to his.
Angel pulled back a little and met Cordelia's kohl dark eyes, his own so charged with emotion that they were nearly black with it.
"That's the answer?" He asked, his voice warm like a slow burning whiskey, rough and almost angry. "Everything happens for a reason?"
He buried his face in the curve of her neck once more, and Cordelia let her fingers brush through his wet hair, the strands clinging to her fingertips as she did so.
"I'm sorry," she whispered. "I'm so sorry..."
Cordelia looked through cherry blossoms and rain to see the first golden hints of dawn breaking up both night and the storm. "Angel, I..."
"Don't," He breathed against her skin, his voice muffled in its warmth. He clung to her hopelessly, pulling her as close as he possibly could, as if sheer will alone could keep her with him.
"I can't, Angel. I can't be here with you anymore," she replied, though she had made no move as of yet to remove herself from his embrace. "I can't," she whispered, almost more softly than even Angel could hear.
"But someday..." she whispered bringing Angel's gaze back up her own. "You can be there with me."
Cordelia smiled softly, cradling his head in her hands.
"Someday... I know... without a doubt, that someday... someday we'll be together... really together. And, Angel, that's what gives me hope. Even when it hurts; even when I can't be here with you, and it feels like someone's shattered my heart into a million pieces like my favorite coffee mug, I still have that hope. I have that hope, Angel."
She brushed her lips ever so softly against his before whispering against them.
"That's what I came to tell you, Champ. That I have faith. I have hope. In you... in me... in us together... and I think... I think that if you can too..."
Angel interrupted Cordelia's whisper with a kiss every bit as fervent as any prayer he had ever uttered from the depths of his soul.
"That's my guy," Cordelia said with an almost giddy breath when they finally parted. Angel smiled a bit wryly and rested his forehead against hers, resisting the dawn for as long as he could.
"If you're my fate," he murmured. "Then I guess it's not so hard to love it after all."
Cordelia smiled brilliantly.
"What's not to love?"
Her smile faded just a touch as she lifted her forehead from his and stepped back a little. "I have to go, Champ. And so do you," she added, nodding toward the golden light seeping through the misty blue air. She kissed him once, softly.
"Don't forget, Angel, The Powers That Be owe us, and we both know I'll remind them of that when the time comes," she said, giving him a familiar playful grin. "Try to have a little faith, and maybe a little hope; for me?
"It's been for you for a long time now, Cordelia," he assured her.
She smiled once again, even more brightly if that were possible, and disappeared into a rain of cherry blossoms. Angel reached out deftly and captured one between his fingers before tucking it carefully into an inner pocket of his leather coat.
"Un dia llegara," he whispered, before stepping back into the shadows and his life...