Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, Loony Toons, or anything that is referenced here in that belongs to another universe.
Author's Note: This is a part of my Round Robin universe, Harry's Dimensional Spittoon Travels. For this to make sense, please read the prologue.
This was further inspired by Supersayingirl's contribution.
Summary: Harry gets a bit lost in his travels.
Left Turn at Albuquerque
There is a dimension that exists simply to create chaos and confusion for travellers, especially travellers of the multi-verse that all dimensions exist in. Those in the know call this dimension Albuquerque.
Anyone can get to this dimension, but it's especially easy for burrowing rabbits to find Albuequerque. Once in Albuequerque, the only way out was to buy a map and make a left turn. Unfortunately, the maps you buy at Albuequerque may or may not be for the dimension that you wind up in.
There was a crack and Harry Potter found himself in front of a newstand.
The man running the newstand blinked and said, "Well, hello, stranger."
Harry looked around with a tad bit of confusion on his face, "Where the hell am I?"
"Albuquerque," the newspaper salesman said.
"New Mexico?" Harry asked.
"No, just Albuquerque," the man said. Harry looked even more confused, which was understandable, Albuquerque had that effect on everyone. Or was that affect? "You must be an interdimensional traveller."
"Yes, is there a beach around here?" Harry asked.
"There's a beach around every corner and snow-capped mountains, too," the man said.
Harry did a complete three-sixty turn on the spot looking around. The newstand was the only business as far as the eye could see, he always thought Albuquerque would look different. The highest pieces of land were a bunch of little hills that looked to have been made by a mole or other burrowing creature, but certainly no mountains. There were no beaches, for that matter, either, except for where the water in a puddle met dry land.
"Are you having me on?" Harry asked.
"No, no," the man said. "Albuquerque is a place between dimensions, it's the interdimensional hub of lost travellers. To get out you have to buy a map and make a left turn."
"I can't apparate?" Harry asked.
"No, we've had other's try it, and it always failed, they would reappear right here."
"Well...it gets lonely at night..." Harry got the look on his face that is identifable in any dimension as the "Too Much Information" face.
"Okay, I'll buy a map," Harry said looking at all the maps. Most were for Albuerque, New Mexico, but a few were for other places.
"Hmm...Costa Del Sol, sun, sand, and waves," Harry read. "Ah, a map to the beach!"
"Really want to go to the beach?" the man said.
"Yeah, I've been trying to find one for awhile. I tried thinking of sand, and ended up in this desert world with four suns that were all being eclipsed at the same time. I tried to think of water and ended up nearly getting eaten by giant sharks and no sand anywhere. I tried thinking of both and ended up nearly getting beheaded..." Harry paused and made himself have a strong Scots accent, "THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE!"
"Ah, it sounds like you have bad luck, traveller," the man said.
"Yeah, so a nice sea breeze and no trouble is what I'm looking for," Harry said. "Costa Del Sol sounds like a nice place. I wonder if it's Spanish, maybe I can work on my language skills. By the way, how much do I owe you?"
"Six sickles," the man said.
"We charge the fee by a conversion to the traveller's native currency," the man said.
"Makes sense," Harry said as he removed the sickles from his ever-full money pouch. "Sun, sand, and waves, here I come."
Harry turned to the left and walked a little to see the dimension fade away.
He found himself at Hogwarts and cursed, "This isn't Costa Del Sol."
"Avada Kedavra," Harry blinked as the green light washed over him and he looked around. "Who killed me?"
Voldemort blinked, "Who are you? How are you not dead?"
"I'm immortal," Harry said. "And you get boring to kill after the first couple of times."
Harry pulled out his map and looked at it, "I really shouldn't have taken that left turn at Albuquerque."
He scratched his head and folded his map, "Oh, well, there's no helping it. Let's see, I need a new and creative way to kill you, got any ideas?"
"Don't kill me?"
"No, can't have that," Harry said. "Hmm...Oh I know! Accio double barrel shot-gun."
A double barrel shotgun flew through the air and landed in his hands, "Well, let's see." He threw the animagus potion at Voldemort again, turning him into a rabbit. "Be werry quiet. I'm hunting wabbit."
After chasing the Dark Lord Rabbit around Hogwarts and shooting holes into everything with his double barrel, Harry finally killed the rabbit and decided it was time to try to get to Costa Del Sol.
"Sun, sand, and waves, here I come," Harry said, apparating on the spot.
This was done on WordPad, so no, it does not mean more of my other fics, sorry.
References to Pitch Black, Deep Water, Highlander, and Final Fantasy VII.