Authoress Drabble! XD

Guess what everyone? July 15th is Ichigo's birthday! Yup, and I decided that, to celebrate, I'm making this random one-shot just for fun! Warning, if you haven't read the latest chapters, you may be a little confused, and you'll see why later. Anyways, enjoy~! XD Enjoy my random spark of madness~!


A dodge ball party for Ichigo!

"Hey Ichigo! Happy Birthday!" Ichigo turned around and sighed as Rukia came running up to walk with him.

Great, the midget's here…he thought. His day was going perfectly as far as he was concerned. There wasn't a single hollow today, and he managed to get up and get to school on time. Bu now that Rukia was here…god knew how this would turn out. Or at least the author knows…he thought. Wait…huh?

"So…how old are ya anyways?" she asked.

"Seventeen duh." He sighed and continued walking away.

"Hey, wait the hell up already!" she yelled and ran to catch up with him. He sighed and stopped as she finally caught up. "I want to do something for your birthday!" she exclaimed.

"Yeah, like what?" he asked, getting a bad feeling about her idea already.

"Well, Renji and I want to play dodge ball with you!" she said. "We played it in gym the other day, and I told Renji, and he-"

"No way!" Ichigo exclaimed. "I do not want a repeat of the last time we got the Soul Reapers in on sports!" He shivered at the memory of bowling with the Soul Reapers and the Espada.

"Aww, please!" she begged. "One time, that's all!"

"No!" he said and continued walking home. Rukia pouted and sighed.

He's no fun at all… she thought.


After Ichigo ate supper, he went to bed before his dad got the chance to perform his 'birthday tackles'. Why can't my dad do something a little more 'normal'? he wondered. He plopped down on his bed and closed his eyes, but before he got the chance to fall asleep, he heard a voice echo in his mind.

Hey King~! Come in here!

Ugh, what do you want, Hichigo? He asked in his mind.

Come in and see~! His hollow said in a creepy sing-song voice. Ichigo sighed and entered his inner world.

"Ok, what do you-" He was cut off as a ball came flying at him; he quickly moved his head to the side and snapped his head in the direction it came from. He could see Hichigo standing a good distance away, grinning and tossing another ball up in the air and catching it with his other hand. "Wha the hell was that for?" he snapped. He heard a whizzing noise and turned around quickly only to be hit square in the face with the same ball that he had dodged a few moments before.

"Ha! Nice one, Tensa! Pow, right in the kisser!" Hichigo cackled. Ichigo rubbed his cheek and turned to see Tensa Zangetsu standing behind him, a smirk on his face.

"What are you two up to?" Ichigo snapped.

"We wanna play dodge ball!" Hichigo said as he threw another lightning fast ball at Ichigo. He ducked and the ball started flying towards Tensa Zangetsu. He held out his hand and caught it.

"It seemed like fun." Tensa Zangetsu said. Ichigo looked at both of them and sighed. "So we thought we'd play some. However, one against one is no fun."

"So you decided to drag me into this? Thanks, but no thanks!" Ichigo said.

"Oh, c'mon, do ya honestly think you're the only one here?" Hichigo asked. He whistled and a bunch of familiar faces came from behind the sideways skyscrapers.

"Wh…what the hell?" he gasped. He saw Renji, Rukia, Uryu, Orihime, Chad, from school, as well as Byakuya, Toshiro, Kenpachi, Grimmjow, Ulquiorra, Rangiku, and Hiisagi and Komamura. "How the hell are you all in my inner world?" he snapped.

"No idea. Ask the author." Ulquiorra replied.

What the hell does he mean by that? Ichigo thought.

"Well King? Can we play now?" Hichigo asked, sounding excited. Ichigo moaned and placed his face in his hands.

"If we do, will you all leave?" he asked. Everyone nodded and he sighed. "Fine, we'll play." How do I get into these messes?


The teams were very 'messed up' at best. Ichigo was the captain of the red team. His partners; Hichigo, Grimmjow, Renji, Hiisagi, Komamura and Byakuya.

Tensa Zangetsu was the leader of the blue team. His team was Chad, Uryu, Rukia, Ulquiorra, Kenpachi and Toshiro. "Aww, man, why am I stuck with Hichigo and Grimmjow…" Ichigo grumbled.

"You can do it Ichigo!" Orihime cheered from the sidelines with Rangiku. Neither of them wanted to play, so they built a lemonade stand and were giving lemonade to any thirsty player.

How the hell did they build one of those? Ichigo wondered.

"The first team to run out of players is the loser." Tensa Zangetsu announced. "You can free one player by catching another ball that was meant to get you out. But if it falls to the floor, you're out." He explained. Ichigo watched as dodge balls rained down from above and landed in the center of the skyscraper they were playing on.

This is getting so weird already…he thought and sighed.

"Ready…go!" Tensa Zangetsu called and everyone ran into the center, quickly grabbing as many of the balls as they could. The game had begun.


Ichigo backed a good distance away from the center, looking around for someone to hit. Hmm…ah! He threw a ball at Rukia. Rukia turned around and saw it head towards her. She kicked the ball and it went flying upwards.

"Ha! Nice try Ichi-" She was quickly cut off as another ball hit her chest and hit the ground.

"Gotcha! You're out!" Renji called from behind Ichigo. Rukia stomped her foot and dropped the ball she was holding and walked to stand off at the side.

"Nice one, Renji." Ichigo commented. He then felt a ball come from behind him and smack the back of his head. "Ow! What the hell?" he snapped and looked behind him to see Grimmjow and Hichigo snickering and giving each other a high five. "You guys can't get your own teammates out! What are you doing?" he snapped.

"Hitting you cause it feels good!" Grimmjow yelled and Ichigo sighed.

Why are they on my team again? He thought. Oh yeah…when we picked teams, I picked Renji, who picked Hichigo, who picked Grimmjow…I swear, when this is over, I'm gonna kill him.


Meanwhile, Hiisagi and Komamura were having a stare down with Kenpachi. "Wow, I'm surprised you wimps are here." Kenpachi taunted.

"Sadly, the authoress is easily influenced by those around her." Komamura sighed.

"Ah, who gives a damn? I really have no idea why we're here, but let's have some fun while were at it!" he cried out and chucked a dodge ball straight at Komamura. He grabbed it, but it threw him backwards and caused him to crash into a nearby skyscraper.

"Out." Hiisagi said. Although Kenpachi wasn't one for rules, he sighed and walked over to the were Rukia stood.

"This is lame anyways. If it isn't an actual fight, it's stupid." He mumbled.


Grimmjow watched as Ulquiorra threw another ball at Hichigo, who simply stepped aside as it flew past. Man, this is going slowly…he thought. They were both supposed to find some way to knock him out, but he was too alert and this was taking way too long for Grimmjow's liking. He ran up from behind Hichigo to stand next to him. "This is dull!"

"I hear ya. But hey, at least we get the pleasure of pounding people constantly without them dying." Hichigo commented as he dodged another ball. Grimmjow took a look at the next ball coming and shoved Hichigo aside. "What the hell are ya doing?"

"Watch this!" he said. Right before the ball hit him, he punched it and it went flying twice as fast back to Ulquiorra. Sadly, Ulquiorra caught it, but not before it pushed him into Tensa Zangetsu, causing the ball he had thrown at Ichigo to go off course and roll to the other's team.

"You're out, ya moron!" Hichigo snapped angrily. "That's what ya get for showing off!" He then felt a ball smack his shoulder, causing him to spin some in place.

"And that's what ya get for getting pissy." Grimmjow sighed. "Besides, I prevented Ichigo from getting out."

"Why'd ya do that anyways?" Hichigo asked.

"Cause when the game's over, I'm gonna throw every single one of 'em at him." He smiled wickedly.

"Heh, I may just join in there." Hichigo chuckled.

"Fine by me." Both of them laughed as they headed towards the lemonade stand for a drink.


Orihime watched as everyone kept chucking the balls left and right. "Wow, isn't this strange." Rangiku looked up at her.

"What's weird?" she asked. "Ichigo's inner world?"

"Huh? No, not that." She shook her head. "It's just...this whole fic seems weird. I mean, it feels rushed and…well, it's just strange!"

"Well, the author's strange, so I guess that'd explain it." Rangiku shrugged. "Besides, it's supposed to be funny, so it doesn't have to make sense!"

"Right!" Orihime smiled.


Uryu took a ball and placed it at the end of one of his arrows. Lemme see…there! He thought and shot a ball at Renji. It hit him right above the head, the arrow disintegrating and the ball smacking his face.

"Hey! You can't do that!" Ichigo called from the other side. "Some one's gonna get hurt that way!"

"Impossible, my aim is perfect." Uryu said, pushing his glasses up on his face. Suddenly, a ball came up and hit him square in the face.

"Heh, gotcha!" Ichigo called out.

"No fair! I was off guard!" Uryu snapped.

"It's perfectly fair! Now get off the field!" he yelled. Uryu sighed and walked off the field.


Things looked pretty even. Ichigo was still in the game, as well as Komamura and Byakuya. On Tensa Zangetsu's side, Toshiro Chad and himself were still in it. Chad had knocked out Hiisagi as they had batted a ball back in forth by punching it as it had headed towards them. It had finally socked Hiisagi in the stomach and he was out. Toshiro turned to see Ichigo standing there, trying to find Tensa Zangetsu. I'll get him back for his disrespect…he thought and growled slightly. He pulled up a ball and covered it in ice and threw it at Ichigo. Right before it hit him, however, it had been cut into pieces. "What in the…?"

"That's not a very nice thing to do." He turned just in time to see Byakuya spinning a ball on his finger. "That would've hurt quite a bit."

"So what? It's dodge ball, and besides, why do you care exactly? He disrespects you a bunch as it is!" he argued. Byakuya shrugged.

"True, however…" he threw the ball and Toshiro ducked.

"Ha! You mi-" The ball bounced off a nearby skyscraper and hit him on his back, causing him to fall forward.

"I think you're a little young to be playing this game without some strategy." He finished. He then turned the ball around and slammed it against the wall. As it bounced, he ducked and hit Chad. Chad quickly caught it and he sighed. "Oh well…"


Since when were powers allowed? Ichigo thought as he began dodging balls left and right that were quickly followed by Getsuga's. After Byakuya had gotten out, Chad had let Rukia back in, but he managed to get them both out when the ball bounced off of Chad and fell out of Rukia's hands. Komamura had actually gotten tired and said 'I'm done' and left. Why is everyone OOC'd here? Now, only he and Tensa Zangetsu were left, and sadly, he was in a tight spot. This story sucks!

"C'mon, you can do better than this." Tensa Zangetsu called. Ichigo dodged another and threw one back, but Tensa Zangetsu glided to the side. The others watched from the sidelines. Renji sighed and looked at Hiisagi.

"Should I call him in now?" he asked. Hiisagi nodded and grinned. He quickly stood up and yelled; "Phoenix Wright! Boot to the Head!" Suddenly, from behind a building, someone in a blue suit and sharp black hair pointed out and a boot came flying out of nowhere, socking Tensa Zangetsu in the head.

"Wh…what the…" Ichigo pointed at the figure, his finger shaking. "Who the hell are you? Why are you even here? And what the hell did you just do?"

"I have no clue. Ask the authoress." Phoenix Wright shrugged. Ichigo could feel every vein in his head pop.

"THAT'S ENOUGH! GET THE HELL OUTTA MY HEAD!" he screamed.


Ichigo snapped his eyes open and looked outside and sighed. The sun was shining lightly outside. Bad dream, a really bad dream…he thought as he rubbed his forehead. He flinched as he rubbed his shoulders. They feel awfully sore…

"Morning Ichigo!" Rukia called as she leapt out of his closet.

"Morning Rukia." He said.

"Man, I'm glad it's the weekend!" she sighed. "Maybe we can all get together and do something!"

"Anything but a sport." He sighed.

"Aww, you're no fun." She said. As she headed out of his room, she turned to lock eyes with him. "Oh, by the way…congrats, you won." As she walked out, Ichigo stared at her wide eyed.

That…all…happened? He thought. The next thing his family downstairs knew, Ichigo was screaming his head off.

"Uh…why is Ichigo screaming?" Yuzu asked Karin as she set the table. Karin shrugged.

"The authoress must've given him a bad time again." She said. Yuzu just shook her head and finished making breakfast.


Fin

Heh, this was all typed in a day! XD Well, I hope y'all liked it! Also, the whole Phoenix Wright joke. Well, go on Youtube and type in Phoenix Wrong, Boot To The Head and see what I mean. XD You'll get it then Well, review please!