Author's Note: Okay so sometimes (all the time) in Junjou Romantica (well at least the anime) they leave Misaki and Usagi doing something (in a ferris wheel, train,etc.) but you only get to guess. So I thought this was perfect to use for lust. This is the last chapter and I wanted it to be the cutest. I also wanted to be a little more forward about the sex scenes but it's nothing anyone can't handle. Hope you like it :)
Disclaimer: I do not own Junjou Romantica or any of the characters…blah blah blah you've heard this before.
Fighting with Usagi-san always made me anxious, but I never thought I'd be standing here crying into the phone like some lovesick girl. I just wanted him back. I just wanted to apologize. Being with Takahiro made me realize something…
I've gone through my whole life pretending. I pretended to be okay after my parents died for Takahiro's sake. I didn't need him holding up a job and trying to comfort me. It would put so much unwanted stress on him and I didn't want things to be that way.
I pretended not to be lonely when Takahiro would leave me home alone. Because I was already a burden I just sat in my room and sobbed to myself. I would cry in quiet with no one just so he would never know. Just so I didn't have to cause him more trouble.
At school I pretended to be happy around the small group of friends I had. I didn't want to become the gloomy friend who ruined trips. I didn't want them to know that I was really just a depressed person.
And deep down inside me….I knew I pretended to like girls. In my whole life I never had a crush on anyone until Usagi came around. I know it is a little weird. Everyone likes someone in almost every grade but not me.
I first realized I liked Usagi when I sat down with him for breakfast. I told him that I really didn't want to be any trouble for him and he said…"I need someone like you around." That simple. He needed me. It was a strange feeling, having someone depend on you.
After he said that I saw him differently. I still can't quit figure it out now as I stand here wiping my eyes like a baby. I can't comprehend the pure love I feel for him. My first, last, and always. Hopefully he felt the same way I felt about him.
"Just wait for me." Usagi's voice was loud and clear. It never felt so nice to hear his voice that more tears came. I barely got out an "okay" before I hung up the phone and sat down on a nearby bench.
I always say I don't like the things Usagi does to me. But I say a lot of things to try and make my life easier. And if he was really forcing me to do anything I wouldn't be with him. And now more than ever I miss his loving cold hands. Because without him I'm just a burden again.
Takahiro wants a family not a depressed little brother to rain on his parade. I never knew I could feel so lonely because of one person. And I know it might be wrong saying this…but I never even felt this heartbroken when my parents died.
When the train pulled up and I saw Usagi the only thing I could do was run. Run straight into his arms and make him promise to never leave me again. Even after the train sped off I stayed there in his arms for such a long time. I wasn't even embarrassed about anything.
After what felt like forever Usagi took me back to a car with a bed in it. We were staying the night? Maybe that's why it took him so long to get here. I sat on the bed.
"Usagi-san….I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything I said…I was just scared about having to leave you and live with Takahiro again…" I could feel the tears coming. My eyes started stinging and my vision got blurry. To my surprise when I looked up Usagi was crying.
"I thought I wasn't going to see you again Misaki…" It was all too much. The tears spilled over. They were hot and bitter. He'd held them back so long in fear of Takahiro hearing him crying that he couldn't stop himself anymore.
"Stupid Usagi!" I wiped my eyes knowing I looked like a little kid. He always made me cry this way. And once I start it's impossible to stop. Unless you use Usagi's method.
When Usagi kissed me I kissed back with all I had. Sometimes you aren't grateful for the things you have. And I thought after my parents died I would never make that mistake again. But I never thought I would have anyone like Usagi in my life. So through my tears I smiled.
I had someone so amazing in my life. I had someone to love me back and…I got it on the first try. I would never be able to want another when I had Usagi-san. And though I don't say it often I loved him with all my heart.
So when Usagi began to unbutton my shirt I didn't call him stupid or a pervert. I just tried to calm my shaking hands to help him with his. I leaned him and breathed in that scent I hadn't smelled in what felt like so long the cigarettes, soap, and something unique that made Usagi smell the way he did and he did the same to me.
And when he pushed me down with the desire burning in those lavender eyes and I had to close mine. It was hard to take everything like that after so long. So when I heard "Look at me." In that voice…in that voice I've grown to love I could barely bring myself to do it.
When I finally looked up his stare was just as shocking as before. But this time I didn't look away I stared back even though it sent electric through my body and lifted my hands to his pants. But for that I had to close my eyes and this time he let me.
And that night Usagi gave himself to me and I gave myself to him. I just remember his warm breath and for once…his hands were warm. And even though I know we inconvenienced everyone near us that was on that train I was happy.
I just remember being happy falling asleep in Usagi's arms because he smiled the smile everyone else rarely sees but I get to see it almost every single day. And I remember thinking I'd do anything for that smile. I think I told him that too. He just kissed me and smiled.
And I thought that night was perfect but waking up in a whole different place was even better. Where no one knew us, where me and Usagi could be a couple. And I'll never forget after looking around in wonder hearing Usagi say "Happy Birthday Misaki." With a smile.
I wasn't lonely anymore.
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