AN: Another Battle Spirits: Shounen Toppa Bashin fic that I had posted somewhere else beforehand. It's just a very cracky post-series idea I came up with after re-watching the series for the millionth time.
Since Number Nine's plans were put to an end, things went back to relative normality. Still, since Card Sensei had moved out of his apartment before leaving Toaru City, now that he returned, he was living with his former girlfriend Masako, who had finally stopped hating him.
Even though he was living in the wilderness for a while beforehand, he managed to hold onto some important possessions, including his collection of My Sunshine merchandise and valuable memorabilia. Masako only first found out of its existence when she was searching in odd places one morning for her lesson plan for class that she lost. Instead, she just dug up My Sunshine image books, posters, banners, clothing and more. There was even a DS game. She didn't even think he owned a DS, so that was particularly weird. Then again, she didn't think he owned all the rest of this stuff. Regardless, it was creepy to the point that she didn't even care about her lesson plan anymore.
Picking up a thick, hardcover book, she found him in the next room and threw it at him. As Sensei didn't notice it fast enough to dodge, the best he could do was hit the book to block it.
"Ma-chin, is something wrong?" he questioned, holding his arm in pain. He wondered what had gotten her that pissed off. Before she could answer, he glanced down at the book on the floor. "Hey, that's my favorite!"
"What do you think is wrong?" she asked, just glaring at him.
"I don't know," he replied, seriously puzzled.
"The fact that you're keeping so many pictures of a 13-year-old," she replied, still glaring. "I don't care that she's an idol. She's still your student now."
Okay, maybe she had a point, he realized, but still… this was the My Sunshine, the most popular and talented artist in the world.
As he didn't respond, Masako added, "So you should get rid of all this before someone finds out and you lose your job for it. Tonari is a prestigious, private school, you know?"
"No way!" Sensei exclaimed. "A lot of this is really rare now."
"And why didn't you tell me you had this?" she asked, already moving on to a new train of thought.
"You didn't ask," he answered.
Guraguri, who was watching this from a distance, could only sigh.
"Well, if this stuff is as rare as you say, then why not sell it and buy something practical that won't get you arrested, like a navi?" Masako asked.
"First off, I'm not selling it, and second off, I don't need a navi. You do," he responded.
"Exactly, and if you love me more than My Sunshine, you'll buy me one," she argued.
"Don't be jealous, Ma-chin," he replied.
"Why shouldn't I be?" she shouted. "Obviously, you just want to spend all your time looking at little girls. Well, have fun at school today!" At that, she stormed away, heading off to Toaru Middle School, although it was still a bit early.
Not knowing what to do, but still feeling a bit guilty and concerned, Sensei turned to Guraguri.
"Master," he began. "Is there really something wrong with keeping a My Sunshine collection?"
"Well for starters… a lot," the turtle replied. "Though Masako might be taking it a bit too seriously. Exactly how much does that book weigh?"
"Several hundred pounds," Sensei replied. "It's the deluxe, deluxe, X-rare edition, made with solid steel."
In school, due to not having any kind of lesson for the day, Masako had to make do. She didn't really feel like teaching at all, but she'd definitely have to do something. After all, she wasn't interested in losing her job too. By the time enough students finally arrived to class, she'd come up with something.
"Alright everyone," she announced. She'd moved in front of the bored, as she'd been sitting in the corner sulking. "Today, you all have to read every chapter in the textbook, and write a 500 page essay. It's due tomorrow. No exceptions! You can start now, so class is dismissed."
Unsurprisingly, all her students were very freaked out.
"You can't do this!" Bashin exclaimed. "How am I going to play Battle Spirits today?"
"That's your problem," she replied. "And I can do whatever I feel like, because I'm the teacher."
"And I don't have to do it if I don't feel like it-keke," Smile interrupted.
"You're already failing Smile, because you come in late and cut," she replied. "But as for everyone else, this is vital to your grade. Remember, no exceptions, and having to play Battle Spirits doesn't count, even if you're the world champion."
"I'm failing?" Smile replied.
"Right," she responded. "And that's ten more points from your final grade for each time you interrupted today."
Used to her getting worked up over anything and taking it out on him, Smile decided not to take all of this seriously.
"Whatever you say, but I won't be doing any homework tonight. Thanks for the day off- kekeke." At that, he left the room.
Bashin was left not knowing whether to panic or rage. He hated schoolwork and didn't know how he was going to manage to get all of this done. But he liked Masako-sensei and didn't want to disobey. He also knew that if he went home, his mother would make him do it. Instead, he sat around in the club room all day, anxiously waiting for Striker and Meganeko to be done with classes.
Eventually, the both of them arrived.
"Alright, Bashin!" Striker exclaimed. "It's time to battle!"
"I can't," Bashin mumbled.
"And why not?" he shouted.
"Masako-sensei is trying to kill me. I'll fail if I don't read this entire book and write a 500 page essay before tomorrow."
"Well how far have you gotten, Bashin-kun?" questioned Meganeko, surprised to hear this.
"I haven't even started," he replied.
"Making you do this is unacceptable!" Striker exclaimed. "But the obvious solution is to battle Masako-sensei, and if you win, she'll have to take it back!"
"Wow, that's a great idea!" Bashin exclaimed. "I can't believe I hadn't thought of that. Thank you Striker!"
"Any time," he replied.
"But Bashin-kun," Meganeko said. "Maybe there's a reason for this, and we should just talk to her."
"I don't have time to talk, Meganeko," he answered. "I have a battle to win!"
He was about to run out the door, but Seven appeared in Galaxy form, stepping in front of it.
"Everyone, I have the solution!" he declared. "If you show her something as sexy as me, she'll be too distracted admiring my beauty to care about homework."
Noticing the mirror that was recently installed in the club room, Seven ran to it and began gazing into it intently.
"Somehow I'm not sure that will work, Sempai," Meganeko commented, before leaving to chase after Bashin and Striker.
Masako was in the music room, sitting at the piano and pointlessly staring at her Angel Voice card. She didn't expect Bashin and Striker to storm into the room like maniacs.
"Masako-sensei, battle me!" Bashin yelled.
"No," she replied, after regaining her composure. "You have to do your work like everyone else."
"But if I win, you'll take it back!" he argued.
"What's been said can't be changed," she answered. "I won't battle you."
"But why?" Bashin yelled, struggling to think of a comeback that would change her mind.
"But isn't that kind of cruel?" Meganeko questioned, once she caught up. Having a bit more common sense then Bashin and Striker, she noticed that Masako had her favorite card out. "Did you get into a fight with Sensei?" she added.
Meganeko was too smart, Masako thought to herself.
"If I did, that wouldn't be your business," she replied.
"It is if you take it out on Bashin-kun!" Meganeko replied.
"Well you're wrong," Masako responded. She didn't want to have Meganeko mad at her too.
Then why did you do it?" Meganeko asked.
"Umm…" she replied, trying to come up with some kind of excuse.
"Who cares?" Bashin interrupted. "We just have to settle this in a battle, unless you're afraid to lose."
Masako was very grateful to Bashin for interrupting.
"I'm not afraid to lose," she replied. "But I have a better idea. Instead of battling me, why don't you battle each other? Whoever wins will get a huge collection of My Sunshine merchandise."
Striker's eyes immediately lit up at the thought of this.
"Sorry Bashin, but I'm going to win this!" he declared.
"That's what you think, Striker!" Bashin exclaimed. "Gate open! Release!" The two disappeared into Isekai World.
"Masako-sensei," Meganeko started. "Do you mean Card Sensei's My Sunshine collection?"
"Yes," she replied. "But how do you know about it?"
"Because I saw it one time when I was at his apartment," Meganeko said.
Masako had absolutely no idea how to respond to this. It was just wrong for elementary school teachers to have their students at their house. Maybe he really was a pedophile.
Bashin and Striker then reappeared in the real world. It was obvious to tell who won, as Striker looked like his life was over, and Bashin had a devious grin.
"Yes"! he exclaimed. "The My Sunshine collection is mine. This makes having to do so much homework worthwhile."
"Wait a minute!" A voice shouted.
"Aibou?" Bashin questioned.
"Right," replied Aibou. "I challenge you for the My Sunshine collection."
"But when did you get here?" Bashin asked.
"I always come to school," replied Aibou. "And you just entered Isekai World, remember? You couldn't have done that without me."
"Hey… you're right!" Bashin exclaimed, amazed that he hadn't realized that. He'd just tried to open the gate as a reflex.
"Well are you up for the challenge?" Aibou asked.
"Of course!" Bashin replied. This time he didn't open the gate, because the system was way too big for someone of Aibou's height. Instead, they set up their cards on the floor, and battled there.
To Bashin's surprise, Aibou started playing with a blue deck. Using the cards' deck destruction effects, he destroyed Bashin's Siegfried, Siegfrieden, Castle-Golem, Titus, Diranos, and even Double Draw, before he was able to draw them. Traumatized by this, Bashin surrendered.
"Yes! I won!" Aibou shouted. "Now I'm the best card battler in the world, and I have the My Sunshine collection."
Bashin was just left whimpering on the floor, along with Striker.
As a bystander in all of this, Meganeko didn't know what to think. She also wasn't sure if Masako should be giving away Card Sensei's prized My Sunshine collection.
"Umm… Aibou-kun," she said. "Maybe you should share with the two of them."
"No thanks," he replied. "Unless I could get a lot of mushrooms in exchange."
Striker sprung up from the floor.
"See you, Bashin! I'm off to cook mushrooms!" he called, as he dashed out of the room.
"I guess I should go get the collection," Masako said, and also walked out.
Meganeko was now left with a half-dead Bashin and a gloating Aibou.
As for Masako, though she thought she knew how to get back to her house from school, she ended up on the other side of the city. And unfortunately, it was now getting late, so it would be harder to see her surroundings in the dark, especially because she didn't think to take her sunglasses off.
"I wouldn't have this problem if I owned a navi," she commented out loud, because no one could really hear her anyway. "Why did I have to offer the My Sunshine collection to those kids when I could've just sold it? I can't go back on my word, so now I guess I'll be lost forever until the morning. I just hope they're smart enough not to wait around for me."
"Need help getting home?" she heard someone say.
Stopping her rant, Masako looked out her window to see it was Card Sensei.
"Ah… Kyo-chin!" she yelled. She almost forgot that she was mad at him, because she was so happy to have help. "How did you find me?"
"You're easy to find," Sensei replied. "Even without a navi, I'll always be able to find the person I love."
"Kyo-chin!" she exclaimed, smiling.
Sensei was glad that she didn't seem really mad anymore.
"Oh, and one more thing," he added, taking out a box.
"A navi!" Masako exclaimed. "This is the latest model."
"I know," Sensei replied. "Remember that book you tried to kill me with? Well, Guraguri convinced me that it could probably get me arrested, so I sold it for $5000."
"But you still have the rest, right?" she questioned.
"Yes," Sensei replied, worried that she'd still be mad, "But I'll get rid of it."
"Well," Masako said. "That's good, because I had Bashin and his friends battle over it. Aibou won."
"Aibou?" he asked, shocked.
"I'm just as surprised as you," she replied. "I didn't even know he played. But that's besides the point. Let's go home."
As the navi still wasn't installed, Sensei had to direct Masako home from where they were. They picked up the My Sunshine collection, and delivered it to Aibou, who was still at the school with Bashin. Meganeko had been unable to drag them out.
Thinking it was a bad idea for Bashin to stay at school overnight, Sensei and Masako also took him back to his house. There, Aibou enjoyed his newly acquired mountain of My Sunshine goods, while Bashin was left staring at his textbook that he never even started reading.