I don't own Criminal Minds

Another coffee related story but with a twist


Spencer Reid walked into the office with a smile and a bounce in his step, he had a feeling today would be a good day. He went straight to the break room for a nice bug cup of coffee.

"Nothing like caffeine in the morning" thought Spencer. He poured a cup out of the pot and took a big gulp and then spit it out in a large spray that went all over the counter.

"Oh no…it's DECAF" shouted Spencer. He tore the break room apart in hope of finding any packs of regular coffee, but there weren't any. Spencer ran into Garcia's office, "Garcia there's no regular coffee left, only decaf." She gave him a sad look, "Sorry G-man, were all out."

"Alright then…I'll need lots and lots of sugar." She gave him a confused look at that point. "Didn't you read the news…there's a recall on all the sugar it's been contaminated. You won't find any sugar anywhere until further notice. Also…the normal coffee was too." "WHAT WHEN" yelled Spencer? She glanced at her clock, "Fifteen minutes ago."

Spencer stood frozen like a statue. Then he ran out of the office and to a local grocery store. "Hi…I'm I heard that the sugar was recalled that's not true right?" The clerk shook her head, "I'm sorry but it is true, there is no coffee or sugar anywhere in this country."


Spencer shot out of bed, drenched in sweat, he laid back and sighed. "Oh thank god it was just a dream" he said to himself.

At the office in the morning, Spencer went to the break room to pour some coffee. He took a big gulp and smiled, "I love coffee" he thought. It was at that moment that Strauss came into the office.

"We are cutting coffee out of the budget to save money" she said. When she went to take away the coffee machine, Spencer stopped her. "Take this machine and I'll tear off your eyebrow" he growled. She stepped back, "What did you just say?" He was silent, "Just touch the machine and see what happens" he said in a low voice. When she put her index finger on the machine, Spence turned into the hulk.

"DON"T TOUCH MY COFFEE" he roared. Strauss screamed.

Strauss shot up out of her bed, she got up and went to her desk, "Coffee stays in the budget" she wrote. She went back to bed afterwards.