A/N: LAST CHAPTER
The Doctor's bedroom was only lit by a single wall sconce, reflecting most of the light off of the wall and ceiling. Two barely moving lumps were under the duvet and sheets, with disheveled heads peeking out the top of them. The Doctor and River had a hand on the side of the other's face, and were both more than a little pleasantly exhausted.
The Doctor stirred a little, and moved so his forehead was against hers. "Mmmm, yes. I do believe I need to start storing some tobacco."
River's heavy lidded eyes popped open to stare at him. "You don't smoke!"
"Maybe not, but I think I'm starting to see the allure," he said with a chuckle, causing her to giggle. "That was... bloody fantastic."
"It was, wasn't it?" she giggled some more. "Much better than I thought it could be... or should be," she agreed.
The Doctor moved to lean up slightly, and rested his head on his left hand. "Is it too soon to ask how you survived?" he asked, while running a finger around her left ear.
River scrunched her eyes together. "E-space," she muttered.
"What?" The Doctor's eyes bulged. "But that's brilliant!"
River shushed him with a hand to his lips, then pulled him down for another snog before pushing her eyes into his neck. "Can we not talk about that? It should not have worked, but it did. Lost K-9 and my TARDIS in the process."
"Oh, I'm sorry." he said, giving her a peck on the top of her head. "Can build you another K-9 if you like? Grow another TARDIS, maybe?"
She shook her head. "Hmm-mmm. Got what I want right here." Her hand slid down and made a point of her statement with what it got a hold of. "Not leaving you again."
"Good answer," he groaned, making her giggle again. "Going to have to though, I'm afraid." He flinched when she nearly pinched something she shouldn't have, and stared up at him. "Sorry!" he squeaked. "You meet me a few times before my present now!"
"Bollocks," she muttered, frustrated.
The Doctor nodded. "Yes, and I like them uncrushed, thank you!"
She giggled again and let go. "Oh, you big baby. Let me make it up to you." She ducked under the covers and slid down.
The Doctor's eyes bulged. "That's not fair! That's... that's..." His eyes rolled up and closed. "Oh that's just... brilliant," he sighed as he rolled to his back. He heard her giggle again, somewhat muffled.
John was staring at his wife with a shocked look on his face. Rose, on the other hand, was completely crimson and hiding behind her hands. He and Rory had joined their wives tea break a few minutes ago, and were just told what the two hens were talking about. Amy thought it'd be a good idea, but Rose was going to either kill her or die from embarrassment. She didn't know which would win out first, though.
"You fibbing fibber!" John said with an alarming high pitch to his voice. "I asked you one time, and one time only!"
"Don't look at me," Rose muttered and turned away from them. John's brow went up and he mentally showed her what he was staring at... which was her bum. "I said don't look at me!" she shrieked.
John looked at Amy while pointing at his wife's bum with his thumb. "Blondie here did say no when I asked. Took finding Mister Bow Tie before she came 'round."
Amy bust out laughing when Rose spun about. "It did not! Nimrod almost killed you!"
"Yeahhh, bout killed you too," John nodded with a shudder. "So it wasn't how 'teacher-man' kept brushing you off, then?"
Rose narrowed her eyes. But instead of a retort, her mouth just opened and closed. Amy could hardly breathe at this point, knowing exactly how she felt. Rory started to pat Amy's back rather hard in an attempt to get her to stop laughing.
"I am so glad I'm not the only one," Rory said, speaking to John. "Here's to ya mate!" He lifted his teacup to him then downed it. Fortunately, he finished it before he was nearly shoved from the table from a half angry redhead.
"Tha's my brother alright. Laaaady Killah!" John said, echoing 'the last human' Cassandra, then laughed outright when Rose banged his arm hard with her knuckles.
"Tha's so not fair!" Rose whinged. "I wanted him to apologize!"
"For which? The first or second time on the beach?" John asked. "Mind you, he's got a third time to atone for now." Rose punched his arm again. "Ow! All right fine! I wasn't going to mention this, but the timing of the third one was very bloody specific."
Amy was quiet now, intrigued, while Rory busied himself in refilling everyone's cups. Rose stopped being mad long enough to look confused. "How'd'you mean?"
John's face fell. He was going to tell her up till when she asked. His feelings of guilt over not telling her for so long, plus the way she'd react, made him mum on the subject. Instead of answering, he stuffed an entire biscuit in his mouth.
"Oh no. You're not getting outta that." Rose said. "Tell me."
John glanced at her from the side and washed the biscuit down. "Well... Uhm... Not so much the when, but what was happening at the same time."
Rose crossed her arms. "Which was?"
"Oh god, how do I get out of this?" John thought.
"You don't!" Rose answered aloud, confusing Amy and Rory.
John sighed. "A dimension over, you were busy telling him your feelings, before the transmission got cut off."
Rose's eyes went wide, and it didn't look like she had any eyelids from the expression. "He did wha'?" she bellowed. "That Bastard!" She stood up and made for the door, but John caught her arm and spun her into his lap. "Let me go!"
"Noooo, nono, no, no, no. You're not going over there right now." John said into her ear, holding her tight. "They're busy."
"I don't care! That was heartless!" Rose said with tears in her eyes.
"He did it because of what's happening now," John whispered in her ear. "How would you have reacted if things went different only to find out he was already married, eh?"
"He didn't know," she said quietly.
John shook his head. "He may not have known consciously, but it was still rattling about in his subconscious."
Rose turned her head to look at Amy. "Guess tha's why he fought you off as well, then."
Amy gave her a look of sympathy. "Most likely." That made Rory's eyebrows go up. She noticed and put her hand on top of his. "Why else you think he came and got you?"
Rory looked away and remembered the botched stag party. "Uhm. Yeah. Think you're right. Blimey."
"Least he has someone now," John said.
Rose squirmed. "You can let me up now."
John shook his head. "This is actually kind've comfortable."
Rose giggled despite herself, and rolled her eyes.
"Wait-a-minute," Amy said, realizing something. "How did you find him all tweed-i-fied? We've been with him the whole time I thought?"
John glanced over. "He said he left you at some amusement park? Didn't want either of you to get caught up in that mess."
"Remind me to say thank you," Rory said, earning another whap to his arm.
"He went off on his own?" Amy asked.
Rose nodded, shifting around. "Yeah. Good thing we were there too, or he could've ended up with yet another face."
Amy scowled. "That is so like him. So what happened?"
The four were still in the kitchen, laughing it up with stories back and forth when they were interrupted. "Here they are!" The Doctor said, announcing their presence. This got four sets of eyes on him and a chorus of cackles. "What?" He looked at John first, but soon realized that he wasn't going to be on his side this time. He said "Stop it!" and made the laughing worse.
"What are you all going on about?" River asked.
Rory was able to speak first. "We're just telling stories. Nothing special." John gave him a look, and they were going again.
Snickering, Rose stood up and walked over to the Doctor. She poked a finger in his chest. "You... are a right bastard." Her face went hard and she gave him a Tyler slap across the face.
John's mouth hung open as he rubbed his own cheek. "Blimey, even I felt that."
"What'd I do?" The Doctor asked, rubbing his cheek and looking like a scolded schoolboy.
Rose squinted her eyes at him. "Tha's for the third time at the bay. Bad enough you left us there, but to do it at the same time I was telling you I love you in that other dimension?" She slapped him again, and the Doctor backed up with his hands in front of him. Rose grumbled, "prat" and wet to sit down again.
River poked his side. "I can't take you anywhere, can I?"
"It wasn't my fault!" he whinged. "A complete accident!" he lied through his teeth.
"Likely story," River said, knowingly. "Now, what do I have to do to get some tea around here?"
While the three couples rest and recuperate over tea and biscuits, we take a peek at where the ship had once crashed to find a barren and empty field, devoid of any scar or blemish.
The Doctor groaned and rolled over to sit up from where John and Rory placed him not fifteen minutes ago. He yawned loudly and rubbed his eyes with the palm of his hands. Feeling a nudge from the TARDIS, he put his jacket on and spent a couple of minutes locating his boots.
"Are we there yet?" he asked the ceiling as he came into the console room. Feeling an 'almost' coming from the ship, he scanned the monitor briefly then went to the door. When the ship thunked its arrival, he opened it to see Rose standing in front of Mickey a bit away from where they were when he left them ages ago.
"By the way, did I mention? It also travels in time," he said before ducking back inside, leaving the door open.
Rose turned to Mickey. "Thanks."
"Thanks for wha'?" Mickey asked, confused.
Rose smiled. "Exactly." She leaned in and kissed his cheek, then turned and ran into the TARDIS with a huge smile on her face. She came to a stop at the console, wide eyed, and with her smile nearly splitting her face.
"Right then Rose Tyler, you tell me. Where do you want to go, backwards or forwards in time?" The Doctor asked rather smugly, playing catch with what looked to be a glass paperweight.
A/N2: And that's it! I suppose I could've done more here, but to do so would drag it out in my opinion. Hope everyone likes the ending! Comment if it strikes you! Love feedback!