Requim Of The Ice King

By Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus

Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus: ...I completely blame the damn heat for me being absolutely lazy. So everyone, I humbly apologize for taking so long. Anyway, here's a little something to cool you off. Heh heh, cool, that's priceless.

Disclaimer: Everything belongs to their owners.


The grumpy Ice King was at it again as he took Princess Bubblegum into his cold, isolated lair of evil. Of course, Finn and Jake were HOT on his tail.

"Curses! They're right behind me!" The Ice King snarled as he tried going faster. "Hoo... age has not been kind to me..."

"Let her go, you ugly bag of ice!" Finn shouted as he flailed his long, skinny arms about.

The Ice King laughed as he ignored Finn's shout. "I'm the Ice King! I do what I want!"

"Then why are you still trying to snatch princesses?" Jake asked as he ran alongside Finn (because he was tired of carrying Finn's fat ass on his back all the time).

"Well... that's a personal question." The Ice King simply responded as he went around the snake curve leading uphill to his lair.

"No, Jake's got a good point. Shouldn't you be finding a queen?" Finn added as he rubbed his head.

The Ice King briefly stopped, looking up at Princess Bubblegum as he pondered. "Uhh..." He coughed as he rubbed the back of his head. "I have problems with women around my age..."

"So basically, you're absolutely fine with being a pedophile." Jake responded as he sighed.

The Ice King gawked as he shook his head. "No, no! That's not what I mean-"

Jake punched the Ice King with his right fist, having extended it out to be able to reach him. This caused the Ice King to head straight into his castle, with Princess Bubblegum still in his possession. "Shut up, wind bag! And while I'm at it, bite my shiny, yellow ass!"

The Ice King moaned as he shook his head, getting up and placing the tied up Princess Bubblegum behind the bars of his newly installed prison cell. Finn and Jake just arrived, but the Ice King was prepared as he got out several sponges.

"Now let's make this a little spongier!" The Ice King stated as he laughed, a certain voice echoing from the laughter as Finn and Jake lunged towards him.