title: the cross to my heart
warnings: homosexuality ahead. also, Ash tops.
notes: my first time writing slash, so do leave concrit.
dedicated to: samia, my dear wifey.


You meet him in a train.

That's nothing out of the ordinary and at first you don't really give him that much attention, either. He's just another smidge of black and white in the background.

But as the ride goes on, at some point, you find yourself staring at him. You watch as he slowly gains one colour after the other.

It starts with his hair. You don't know why or how it works but apparently there can be two kinds of black. The first is a bleak, dreary sort of type. The second is too strong and intense for words to describe.

The next are his eyes, a warm soil brown, then his skin, it kind of almost blinds you, until all of him is fully coloured out, and you wonder.

You think, you muse.

And come to the conclusion that he must be the most disgusting person on the entire planet.

He's laughing; fooling around with his friends and you're nearly sure that there isn't a situation in which he doesn't smile.

You are here with your brother, stuffed in dark suits neither of you have worn in years, on the way to your father's funeral. Quite frankly, you don't really care about it, because it's more of a hassle to you than anything else. And it's not like you really knew him or anything.

The next time you shoot him a glance, he looks at you. It's then you decide you hate him. Such a pathetic loser, you think, because you can. Instead pitying you he should worry about himself.

You don't know what gave it away, even though you're quite certain it was your outfits. Normally, people only wear black suits for formal events and, considering the heavy silence between you and your brother, it's no surprise that he believes you need compassion.

It makes you angry, indescribably angry and you feel the urge to punch him until your far too white dress shirt is soaked scarlet with his blood.

Red. Deep, thick red. It has always been your favourite colour and sometimes you dream you drown in it.