DISCLAIMER: We don't own Twilight, But I do own a copy of "THE WORST CASE SCENARIO: Travel Handbook"!


Chapter 5


I had a fairly long break between lectures, so I made my way to the SU for a bite to eat and a coffee. It was surprising to see Alice and Rosalie sat together looking as if they were Pinky and the Brain, plotting to take over the world. I grabbed a plate of Lasagne and headed over to join them.

"Ladies." I sat next to Alice as Rosalie had filled the chair next to her with her laptop and I was sure she wouldn't appreciate me sitting on that.

"Hey hun." Alice beamed at me.

"You're in a good mood." I waggled my eyebrows at her suggestively. "Nice early night?" The punch on my arm had no effect other than to cause me to laugh at her.

"What would you know about my early night, hmmm?" Uh oh. The Alice glare. I coughed and tucked into my food. "Thought as much mister." She turned to speak to Rosalie. "Sorry for that rude interruption. You were telling me about the review. When is it going to be printed?" I tuned them out and ate my food. It tasted like absolute cardboard, but I was a growing boy and need to bulk up for training tonight. "EMMETT!" Alice's shrill voice made me jump.

"What?" I shook my head to clear it.

"I was asking if it was ok for Rosalie to come to training. She's thinking of interviewing the team in preparation for the big race."

"Sure, that would be great. We could do with the exposure to be honest. Ali, I'll leave you to give the beautiful Rosalie the details, I need to run, my lecture starts in ten." I gave them both a 100 watt Emmett special smile, grabbed my stuff and left them to it. I liked the idea of being alone with Rosalie, maybe….


I woke to the smell of bacon cooking and almost flew out of bed. I legged it down the stairs to find one of the Bens had left me a Bacon sandwich on the table covered in foil before leaving for a lecture. I loved those guys. I sat down and tucked in. I was lecture and work free today. What to do? I finished up and was just about to hit the shower when my mobile went off.

Dnt 4get training m8 – Emm

Training? Oh shit! It was then that everything came flooding back to me and I remembered.

"Oh, god." My head fell into my hands as I looked at my watch; I had twenty minutes to get my arse down to the Cam.

Fifteen minutes later, I was dressed in tracksuit bottoms and a tshirt and running at full pelt down to where the team trained. I was lucky my digs were close to the river.

I skidded to a halt on the bank in what was probably my personal best. Three minutes to get from the flat to the river. I could see the lads carrying the boat with Alice behind them alongside the blonde girl from the gig… Rosalie was it, her tiny frame seemingly having no trouble carrying a pair of heavy blades.

Slowing up to a jog, I crossed to the group and looked them up and down. They were huge. There was no kind of intermediate size between them and me – I was skinny and pointlessly built, and they were… woah.

"G'mornin', tiger," Alice greeted me with a large smile and a small nod of her head. "Nice to see you've turned up, and just in time."

"Emmett thought you'd pussied out," Rosalie was blunt, but she was smiling, "You don't look particularly… ready to row." She indicated my aging trackies and tee.

"I figured today would just be an… introduction?" I looked to Alice for help, but she just seemed amused, "Apparently not."

"What?" She pretended to be insulted and held up the blades like a warrior princess. They towered over her, "I figured throwing you in at the deep end would be rather fun."


"What!" I couldn't help but gasp out the words as she shrugged simply and shouldered the blades again, calling out to Emmett, who turned around and nearly dropped his part of the boat when he saw me.

"Douchesper! You showed Dude!" He called, seemingly overjoyed, tugging lightly at his wetsuit-shorts and looking back at me with a small smile. "Pixie, you were right! He wasn't a sniveling coward, but he is dressed all wrong." I couldn't quite stop the snigger at that comment.

She giggled at him and elbowed him in the chest lightly. Not being entirely sure where we stood as a friendship, or couple or whatever, I was forced to watch this with an entirely false smile plastered onto my face as she got progressively more violent, and a lot closer to Emmett than I had ever seen a girl get with a guy who they deemed just good friends.

Rosalie, on the other hand, was standing to the side, holding the blades that Alice had abandoned, and was rooting way too hard for the pixie-sized girl. Eventually, Emmett got a really good grip on Alice's shoulders, and grabbed her by the back-hem of her t-shirt, which I realised was only just covering a strappy top and shorts, and lifted her into the air.

"You're going in, Pixie-Cox!" Emmett yelled, catching the attention of all of the guys who had been taking their time to put the boat into the water. They turned as one and began to cheer loudly, laughing as Alice squirmed and fought, and I almost wanted to start a fight to get her out of his hands – he looked as though he was going to hurt her, or throw her into the river. I took a step forward, almost ready to launch forward, but Rosalie gripped my arm and pulled me back a little way.

"Wait." She commanded, and I had to obey, forced to watch as Emmett unceremoniously dumped Alice into the water headfirst. I had an overwhelming urge to kick the huge guy's arse knowing I would be flattened within about three seconds. Alice was too small for all this rough and tumble, I really wanted to protect her.

The splash was immense as she went in, and came up shaking with laughter and utterly covered in pond weed. Emmett waded in after her and lifted her up onto the bank, smacking her backside hard as he put her down.

What the hell was going on?