Disclaimer: I don't own anything. This version of Alice in Wonderland belongs to Tim Burton, and the Chronicles of Narnia belong to C.S. Lewis (may he rest in peace) and Disney and Walden Media (and Fox, since Disney's not supporting it anymore, :P) Because I'm kinda basing the characters off of that version. The BBC version rocks too, but I haven't seen that one recently, so the newer version's at the front of my mind right now. So keep your lawyers locked up and FAR away from me!
When Lucy Pevensie walked through the small door, she indeed saw the same things that her siblings saw when they entered Underland. Lucy was so enchanted by what she saw, that she didn't even notice when the door closed shut behind her. It was just like walking into Narnia out of the wardrobe. She half expected to find a lamppost and a friendly faun around.
"Hey! It's Alice!" a voice cried.
Startled, Lucy spun around and saw two . . . boys, walking towards her. They might have been quite short, had Lucy been her normal size, but she was indeed not even a foot tall, so the twins were in fact giants compared to Lucy's current size. One of them had an excited look on his face, while the other scowled.
"That's not Alice!" the second one said.
"Sure it is! Look, see, she's got that . . . stuff, on top of her head, and she's wearing that . . . thing," the first one said.
"But Alice had different stuff on top of her head, and she was wearing a different thing! That's not Alice, I say!" the second one argued.
"Pardon me, but I think you have me mistaken for someone else. I'm Lucy, Lucy Pevensie," Lucy interrupted. She privately wondered if the Alice the boys were talking about was Lucy's cousin Alice.
"See! I told you she wasn't Alice! She's a . . . what did you say your name was again?" the second boy asked.
"Lucy," she replied.
"See! She's a Lucy," the second one said.
"Well, what do we do with her?" the first one asked.
The second boy thought for a moment, and then his eyes brightened. "Oh! We can take her to Absolem!" he suggested.
"Absolem's gone, remember?" the first one reminded.
"Oh, yeah. Hmmm . . . Oh! I know! We can take her to Tarrant!"
"Oh yeah! We can take her to Tarrant! Uh, who's Tarrant?" the first one asked.
"Hatter!" the second one yelled.
"Oh! Yeah, he'd know what to do with her! He's one of the first ones to have met Alice, right?" the first one asked.
"Yeah, yeah he was!" the second one agreed.
"Weell let's take her to him then!" the first one exclaimed.
"Right!" the second one said before taking Lucy's arm.
"Come on, Miss! We're taking you to Hatter!" the second one stated.
"Who?" Lucy asked.
"The Mad Hatter!" the second one repeated.
"I don't think I should be going to see someone who has anger problems," Lucy said.
"Not mad as in angry! Mad as in crazy!" the first one clarified.
"I'm not sure that's such a good idea, too." Lucy said.
"Well, we'd take you to the White Queen, but she's awfully busy with the repairs of Underland right now, so you'll have to deal with Hatter." The first one said.
"White Queen?" Lucy repeated.
"Uh-huh, she's our ruler. A nice improvement to that bloody big-head, the Red Queen," the second one said.
"Stuck-up, was she?" Lucy asked.
"Well that, and she had a big head," the first one said.
"Oh, well, what are your names?" Lucy asked.
"I'm Tweedledee!" the first one announced.
"And I'm Tweedledum!" the second declared.
"Nice to meet you, Tweedledee and Tweedledum. If you don't mind my asking, where am I?" Lucy asked.
"Oh, good lord, you're asking the Tweedles for information? What is this world coming to?" a voice asked.
Lucy felt a chill run up her spine, and she turned around to see a cat head floating in mid-air. Swallowing her surprise, she gave him a half-hearted smile.
"Hello," she said weakly.
"Hello, my dear. Who might you be now? You're certainly not Alice," the cat mused.
"No, my name's Lucy Pevensie," Lucy replied.
"A pleasure to meet you, Lucy. My name is Chessur, otherwise known as the Cheshire Cat," the cat said, bowing his head.
"Nice to meet you, Mr. Chessur," Lucy replied, bowing her head in return.
"Now, tell me Lucy, why on earth are you traveling with the Tweedles? They are utterly useless, you know," the Cheshire Cat asked.
"They said they're taking me to someone called Tarrant." Lucy said.
"Ah, Tarrant, yes. For once, they actually thought up something useful. Assuming they don't get lost, that is. No matter. It has been a pleasure, Lucy dear, but I really must be off," Chessur said before disappearing into thin air.
"I hate it when he does that," Tweedledee grumbled.
"Hey! We're almost there!" Tweedledum cried, jumping up and down.
Lucy looked up, and saw a very tall, very unstable looking house on a hill. Frowning, she walked with the twins up to a long table outside the house, where a grey hare in a suit with a nervous twitch was sitting along with a man with skin paler than the White Witch's, wild carrot-top hair, and a top hat on.
"Hello Tarrant! Hello Thackary!" Tweedledee greeted.
"You're late!" the hare cried, throwing a tea-cup at them.
"Who is this?" the man asked, standing up and looking Lucy curiously.
"This is Lucy! She says she's from where Alice is!" Tweedledum said.
The man's eyes opened wide and he smiled. Lucy didn't like that smile.
"You know Alice?" he asked.
"Yes, she's my cousin," Lucy said, feeling uncomfortable under his cat-green eyes.
"How is she? It's been such a long time since I've seen her," the man inquired.
Lucy was contemplating whether or not she could trust him enough to tell him when she was interrupted by the sound of shouting voices.
"You dare to impude my honor?" an outraged voice cried.
"Honor? I didn't even know that was in your vocabulary!" another voice retorted.
"Why you filthy little wench! I don't care that you're a woman – were you not a friend of Lady Alice's I would have you lashed thirty times and then hanged for your insolence!" the first voice declared.
"Oh, I'm so frightened! What are you going to do, whip me with your magic tail?"
"As I told you before this tail was granted to me by Aslan himself and you would do well to refrain from making jest of it, or I swear by the Lion –"
"Reepicheep?" Lucy exclaimed.
"Lucy!" a chorus of voices exclaimed.
Lucy stared as her siblings came running up to her and embraced her.
"Lucy, we were so worried!" Susan cried.
"You wouldn't believe what's happened! Well, you would, since you probably went through the same thing," Edmund said.
"What have we told you about running off, Lu? You always seem to end up in a strange land when you do," Peter laughed.
"You found it too!" Lucy cried happily before looking over at Alice.
"Alice! You came, too!" Lucy exclaimed.
"And she's been here before," Susan said.
"I figured, what with how many people have mentioned your name," Lucy said before looking over at the mouse.
"And Reepicheep! How did you get here?" Lucy asked.
"I wish I knew myself, my Lady. But it is a pleasure to see you again," Reepicheep said, drawing his sword and bowing.
"Hmph," a white dormouse frowned, crossing her arms in displeasure.
"Reepicheep isn't the only one from Narnia here, Lu," Peter said, turning around.
Lucy looked over his shoulder and her eyes opened wide with delight. "Caspian!" Lucy shouted, running over and embracing the young King.
"Hello Lucy," Caspian laughed.
Lucy smiled brightly up at the young boy, and she looked over at her siblings. "This is wonderful! We're all here, just like old times!"
Peter chuckled slightly and smiled. "Exactly like old times, Lu," he said before looking over at the unstable looking hare and the man with the strange glint in his eye. The smile slowly faded from Peter's face as he grew increasingly uncomfortable. He coughed slightly. "Ah . . . good day, sirs . . ."
"Hello Tarrant, Thackary," Alice piped up, smiling. Lucy could see the relief flood onto Peter's face at not having to address the strange duo.
A wide grin spread onto the man's face. "Alice!" he cried, jumping up onto the table and running over to the group – quite a few articles of food and porcelain flying through the air as he did so. Susan seemed completely appalled by the display, and Reepicheep put a hand on his sabre.
"Alice, it's absolutely brilliant to see you!" the strange man – Tarrant – gushed.
"You didn't RSVP! No tea for you!" the hare screeched, throwing tea-cakes at the group. They were all rather badly aimed though, and none of them got hit by the pastries. Reepicheep twitched, and Lucy could see the little knight was having a hard time from lunging at the hare.
"Oh hush now, Thackary. There's plenty of tea for everyone!" Tarrant said cheerily before looking down at the shrunken humans. "Ooh! I think you'd like some cake first though!" he declared, getting a slice of the "Eat Me" cake and putting it on a plate and down on the ground so the Pevensies could reach it. Lucy recognized it immediately, and she looked up at Tarrant. "How will we know how much is enough?" she asked. The other Pevensies gave Lucy a questioning look. Lucy guessed that Alice's expertise had saved them from having to try the cake and learn of its side-effects.
Tarrant smiled down at Alice, displaying his yellow teeth, and he took a small butter knife and gently nicked off a small corner of the cake, holding it down to Lucy. "There, that should be enough!" he said brightly.
Lucy gave Tarrant a thankful smile, and then took the piece – which was the size of a baseball to Lucy – and stuffed it into her mouth. Instantly, Lucy felt herself began to grow. She smiled down at the others, who were staring up at Lucy incredulously.
"Lu! You're huge!" Edmund exclaimed.
Lucy giggled. "Of course! That's what the cake does! Go on! Eat the same amount I did and you'll be fine!" she said.
All three boys looked rather abashed. "I . . don't know if that's such a good idea, Lu," Peter said a bit sheepishly.
Lucy blinked in confusion down at her siblings, and Susan exhaled.
"Stockings aren't as easily adapted to size as our underdresses are, Lucy," the elder sister pointed out.
Lucy's eyes widened. "Oh . . ."
Alice – who had already grown to normal size – looked over at the Hatter. "Tarrant, you wouldn't happen to have anything my cousins could wear, do you?" she asked politely.
Tarrant looked thoughtful for a moment, and then he rushed over to the rickety house, the sound of crashes coming from inside, followed by a string of curses from Tarrant – who seemed to have suddenly adopted a Scottish accent – before he rushed out, holding a few dresses, tunics, and trousers. "These should do nicely!" he declared, throwing the articles of clothing at the humans.
After the Pevensies and Caspian had all gone behind a nice large shrub to grow and then change into appropriate clothing, they all awkwardly sat at the long table. Edmund had somehow ended up seated next to Thackary – and he was obviously not happy with this arrangement – and Alice sat next to Tarrant, the Tweedles sitting on the other side of her. Lucy sat next to them, and then Peter, Caspian, and Susan on the other side of her. Reepicheep and Mallymkun were content with sitting on the table itself – though not together, Lucy noticed. The two mice must not have gotten off on a good start, considering how they were sending each other glares every so often.
Lucy had been engaged in a chat with the Tweedles – the two twin boys had started to grow on her – and her two older siblings had been talking Narnian politics with Caspian when an exclamation came from Thackary.
"Hatter! Eddung here says that none of them have a birthday today!"
"Edmund," the younger Pevensie boy grumbled, but Tarrant's eyes widened.
"Really?" he asked, looking around at the new comers.
Peter looked around a little uncertainly. "No, I'm afraid not, sir,"
Tarrant smiled brightly. "Well, we simply must celebrate!"
"Oh dear," Alice exhaled.
Before anyone could inquire as to what was going on, Tarrant had placed a giant cake on the table, and set off a range of fireworks. He stood up on the table, an accordion in hand, and he began to dance – though it was the strangest dance Lucy had ever seen. It was as if he had no joints whatsoever, and his feet and legs just turned in whatever way they saw fit. He was playing on the accordion a rather disjointed tune, but the Tweedles ant Thackary seemed to enjoy it, as they were swaying and bouncing along with it. Mallymkun seemed offended by the whole thing, however, and climbed inside a teapot to grumble to herself.
"Alice, would you kindly tell us what's going on?" Susan asked, her voice tense. Lucy inwardly winced. Susan was obviously put off by this whole thing. The logic that her mind relied on was failing her at every instant in this world. She had become accustomed to Narnian logic, but Underland, it seems, had a whole different set of rules.
Alice exhaled. "They're celebrating our Un-Birthdays,"
"Our what?" Susan exclaimed.
"What's an Un-Birthday?" Edmund asked, looking very bewildered.
"Now, statistics prove, prove that you've one birthday!" Tarrant sang, bending down to look at the Pevensies, causing Susan to jump in surprise.
"Imagine, just one birthday every year!" Thackary sang back, holding up his tea cup and swaying with it, like a drunkard might with his tankard of mead.
"Ah, but there are three hundred and sixty four unbirthdays!" Tarrant sang, jumping up in the air to clap his heals together.
"Precisely why we're gathered here to cheer!" Thackary cackled before hopping up onto the table to dance with Tarrant. The two happily danced and laughed before turning to Alice, who had an amused, yet fond smile on her face. Lucy guessed that this was not the first time she had been to one of these "Unbirthday" parties.
"A very merry unbirthday!" they sang happily.
"To me?" Alice replied, a chuckle in her voice.
"To you!" Thackary replied, hopping on Tarrant's shoulders, pulling off the man's hat revealing a slightly smaller cake.
"A very merry unbirthday!" the two repeated as Tarrant took the cake off his head and presented it to Alice.
"For you!" Tarrant said cheerily.
"Now blow the candle out my dear and make your wish come true!" Tarrant declared before diving behind a shrub with Thackary as Alice blew out the candle.
"A very merry unbirthday, to you!" the two sang as Alice's cake suddenly started shake. Alice quickly put the cake down on the table as it took off into the sky and exploding.
Reepicheep jumped up. "Those two tried to kill you!" he exclaimed angrily, drawing his sabre and starting to march off towards where Tarrant and Thackary were ducked in cover. Alice chuckled and gently lifted Reepicheep up, shaking her head.
"They meant no harm. They do this sort of thing all the time," she explained as Mallymkun floated down onto the table, covered in cake, a parachute strapped onto her back. Her arms were crossed over her chest, and she was mumbling angrily.
"How did she get in the –"
"Don't ask," Alice replied, cutting off Peter's question.
Lucy just chuckled and smiled brightly as the Tweedle Twins happily grabbed fistfuls of the falling cake and stuffed it in their mouths. She looked over at Caspian, and noticed that the young king had a bewildered look on his face. Susan looked like she had a rather bad headache, Peter as if he weren't sure what to make of the whole thing, whilst Edmund looked doubtfully at the cake in front of him. Lucy couldn't blame him – he had learned the hard way not to trust magical food.
"This place is impossible," Susan murmured. Alice just smiled.
"That's why I called it Wonderland as a child,"
Lucy looked up at her cousin, and felt a new sort of admiration for the older girl. Like Lucy, she had stumbled upon a magical world at an incredibly young age. Now Lucy saw why Alice had been thought so odd when they were all much younger. And Lucy found a small giggle escaping her as she thought how ironic it was that Alice Kingsly, discoverer of Wonderland and the Pevensies, Kings and Queens of Narnia were related. The universe was a funny thing, sometimes.
"Oh dear, another Unbirthday party?" a dry voice sighed.
Lucy jumped as she recognized the voice, and Alice smiled as she turned to face the floating cat's head. "Chessur!"
The Cheshire Cat gave his Cheshire grin, and the rest of his body materialized – though it was still floating. "Alice, my dear. How good to see you again," the cat purred, taking Alice's hand in his paw and kissing it.
Lucy could feel her siblings and Caspian watching the exchange incredulously. Reepicheep was watching the cat warily, a hand on his sabre. Mallymkun sniffed. "Oi, what do you want then, furball?" she asked irritably.
Chessur turned and gave the Doormouse a chilling grin. "Watch your tongue, Madame Mouse. We wouldn't want you to be suddenly swallowed by an incorporeal cat, now would we?"
Mallymkun laughed. "Ha! I'd like to see you try, cat,"
At that moment, Tarrant's head popped up from behind the shrubbery. "Ah! Hello Chessur!" he cried, jumping up above the bush and landing on top of the table. Thackary was holding onto Tarrant's hat tightly, looking around nervously. He looked down at the cat, his eye twitching.
Chessur just chuckled, and he turned to Lucy, bowing to her. "Lovely to see you again, my dear,"
Lucy smiled, a little less afraid of the cat now that she was normal sized. "Hello Mr. Chessur. These are my brothers and sister, Peter, Edmund, and Susan. And that's Caspian and Reepicheep, some friends of ours. Everyone, this is Chessur," Lucy said.
Chessur bowed his head. "A pleasure to meet you all," he said, arching an eyebrow as Reepicheep struggled against Caspian's hold. He turned back to Alice. "However, I'm afraid this meeting was not for pleasure. Her Majesty the White Queen would like to speak with you, Alice. She's heard you've arrived back, and would love to meet your mysterious cousins,"
Now, Lucy had originally thought nothing of the title of the Queen of this land, but when she saw the color drain from Edmund's face, something in her head clicked. The White Queen. Oh, by Aslan's mane it couldn't be! She was dead, and her wand destroyed! There was no way she could have been brought back . . . ! Lucy saw similar thoughts going through the heads of Peter and Susan, and though the same horror wasn't on Caspian's face, Lucy could see the suspicion in his eyes.
Chessur seemed to notice the sudden change in atmosphere, and he tilted his head – quite literally, it seemed to tilt on an axis. "Is something the matter?" he asked in that cool, purring voice of his.
The Pevensies were silent, and then Susan – ever cool-headed Susan – spoke up. "Oh, nothing. We were just surprised at how fast word gets around here,"
The Cheshire Cat gave a chuckle – a deep, chilling sort of rumble. "Oh no, we've known far longer than when you arrived, my dear Ms. Susan. We've known for quite a while that you'd show up,"
Another chill swept over the Pevensies. "How did you know we'd show up, Chessur?" Alice asked, curiosity clear on her face.
The ghostly cat turned to Alice, and gave her his wide, chilling smile. "Why, Alice, you should know. The Oraculum foretold it, of course,"
An update, just as I promised! :D And I'll try and make updates as frequent as possible, but I've got other stories I'm working on, plus school - though it looks like I'll probably have a bit of free time next week, considering all the teachers are going on strike - but I WILL try to update. Also, I apologize for any spelling/grammatical mistakes. I don't have a Beta yet, and I can't proof-read my own work because my eyes just seem to skim over all the mistakes. Hopefully spell-check took care of most of it.
Also, I apologize if my writing style is different - I've been away from this story for a while, so it might take me a while to get back into that style I was writing with for this story. Also, I know Tarrant/the Mad Hatter is probably woefully out of character, I apologize for that too.
But on the bright side, look! Poster! *points upwards*