I really love being booed. As much as i love being cheered. Hell i even love being laughed of! I don't care, it's all the same to me, as long as i get a REACTION. I want people to react to my sight, i just can't stand being ignored. I dispise indifference. I don't really know why, nor do i care to know. Its probably just another thing due to my egotistical self.
And thats why I absolutely loathe him. In all those years we've worked togheter, we've traveled together. Not a single word. Not a single fucking word! He barely looks at me, and never in the eyes. It doesn't seem like he's avoiding me or anything. He just doesn't care. And I can't accept it. I won't. It became slowly at first, to finally comsume me whole. Its all i think about, it's more than an obsession. I feel i will die if i don't make him notice me, have any sort of opinions or thoughts about me. Some would say its unhealty. And it probably is. But at this point, i don't care. Randy Orton will know who i am, no matter what i have to do to him so he never forgets the name of Chris Jericho.
The question is how? I've already tried beating him senseless in the ring. Nothing. Yelling at him. Nothing. Insulting him to the point where anyone would've killed me. Nothing. I just don't get what's with him. I've never had this problem with no one. Or at least, it never annoyed me like it annoys me with only thing i still haven't tried is simply confront him on it. But it would means honestly admit something personal to someone. And really, i don't know if the mighty Chris Jericho can achieve such a thing.
But fighting him tonight as he RKOed me then Edge, and didn't even took a look at me to pin Edge... I don't know, it made me feel like he didn't even felt like i was worth of his efforts. That lit the ultimate fire under my ass. I can't just stand still while he overlook me over and over again.
I leave the ring so enraged i can't see straight. I go directly toward his locker room. Someone is asking me where I'm going , telling me to go take a shower at least before storming out but it seems my rage is preventing anything happening around me to get throught my brain. I'm focused on the task at hand : Makes sure Randy Orton never walks past me without any sort of acknowledgement towards myself. I storm into his room walking on him about to undress himself of his wrestling trunks, probably about to get into the show or something . But my sudden entrance stops him. He takes a look at me, rises his eyes to the sky, sighing, to finally resume him movement and getting back at undressing himself.
I'm seeing red now. How dare he? Turning his back on me? Pretend i doesn't exist? I DO exist, i'm right here, asshole! How dare you ignore me?
I'm so mad i don't realise i was charging him until i hot him pinned to the wall, facing me with his usual look or indifference. At the most, he might look slighty annoyed that he's being interrupted. Like he would have anything better to do than being in my presence. As there anything better in the world that being graced by the sight of Chris Jericho.
- What the fuck is your damn problem, Orton ?
- Was about to ask you the same thing.
I smirk at the fact that he actually give me a form of response. It's a start. We'll see what i can get out of him from there. 'Caus honestly, at this point i just really want to know why.
- Now, We're gonna have a little talk you and I, Viper.
- I truly don't feel like it.
- I don't care what you feel like doing right now, we're talking.
He sigh once again, and for the first time looks at me in the eyes. Never noticed how bright and intense his eyes were.
What is it Jericho? We honestly never talked, or interacted outside the ring for that matter. So what could you possibly want with me?
He looks bored out of his mind and wanting to get it over as quickly as possible. Does his damn shower matters so much that he can't have a fuckign conversation with me?
- That's exaclty it, Orton. Why the HELL are you acting like my existence doesn't matter one bit to you?
- Because it doesn't. I honestly don't care, Chris. We have nothing to do with each other outside of work.
- Well you made friends with aa lot of the guys, you're hanging around with them go out at the bar where i go out with them, we spent so much time in the same room why don't you even look at me or aknowledge that i'm there?
- Why do you care! I just never felt like getting to know you that's all i just didn't felt like i had anything in commun with you. Why is it such a big deal?
- Caus I'M a big deal! 'Caus everyone have a reaction to me, do you get it? No one 'doesn't care' about Chris Jericho!
- Woaw... How egotistical of you...
- Well maybe, but that's how i am i need a reaction out of people.
- am i really the only one who never reacted to you? Really?
- Well, maybe not the only one.
- Then why aren't you breaking into THEIR locker room pining THEM to the wall?
- I...hum, i don't know.
I chuckle slighty at that. I feel suddenly a little stupid. Why do i overreact like that only when it comes to him? Why do i get in such rage? Why can't i just not care of him like he doesn't care of me? I guess its a damn mystery.
- I guess i'm just way to centered on myself. Like usual. I admit what i just did was pretty , you can just forget about this and go back to denying my existence. I mean, i'm a grown man i don't need to get everyone's attention.
I'm quite embarassed now, i feel like i should apologize. I mean i'm not as violent and unreasonable as i portray myself on the ring. I'm actually quite calm usually. It just that for some reason, Randy Orton always gets the best out of me without even trying. Im already moving toward the door to leave when i hear i chuckle. A chuckle of disbelief . I turn around to see him smirk his blue eyes looking straight into mines. I'm suddenly searching for a way to regain my breath. What the fuck is happening to me? He must see the surprise on my face.
What? You really didn't knew yourself? I can't believe i didn't get it earlier...Hell, if i had knew...
What the fuck are you talking about Randy?
His expression is so arrogant i can't barely stand it.
-About the reaction you want out of me,Chris.
- I'm not sure what you're trying to imply, but all i'm looking out of people is a reaction. That's it. I don't care what kind.
- It may be true for most people but not for me, i think.
He's moving toward me in a way i've never seen him move. It's quite fascinating but at the same time i feel uneasy. I don't know what is about to happen, but i'm not sure i'm ready for it. But seeing the look on Orton's face, i'm not positive i have a choice.
-And why would you be so special?
- Weren't you the one saying you didn't know why you needed me to care so much about you?
-...Well maybe. But i just don't know where you're going with this.
He keeps getting closer and i find my heart trying to beat his way out of my chest, what the fuck?
-Oh, i think you know. And it actually please me to a point you can't even imagine. You will discover why i was ignoring you at the same time that you will learn why it made you so upset. Isn't it the perfect outcome, huh?
His smile could be creepy to some people but i find it mesmerizing i suddenly get what makes it so hard to look away. Its the desire covering it. Oh. God.
I don't have a heart anymore, it bounced out of my chest and is laying on the floor, at his feet. I don't even have to ask myself if this is what i want. At the second i realise what he's talking about, i know it's been it all along. I feel like i should be scared of frightened to discover such a thing about me out of the blue. I feel i should be confused and lost. But i don't. It just feels to right and i don't need to embarassed myself with questions and doubt. I know what i want.
I Want Him.
It was as simple as that. All along it was because i wanted him.
I can't stop from laughing at how dumb i am. He smiles at hearing my laughter.
- What is so funny?
-I'm such a dumbass!
His smile broadens.
-Yes, you are.
I smile back at him, his smile his the most contagious thing ever.
- But its ok, really, i don't mind.
I take the final step toward him, our chest finally touching. I reach to grab the back of his neck and connect our foreheads together. I can't take my eyes away from his. His smile is bigger than ever.
- And you know what?
- I do care.
I don't think i'll mind if people don't care about me anymore. I just realised i needed only one person to care. It just needed to be the right one.