Now hush little baby, don't you cry
Everything's gonna be alright
Stiffen that upper lip up little lady, I told ya
Daddy's here to hold ya through the night
I know mommy's not here right now and we don't know why
We feel how we feel inside
It may seem a little crazy, pretty baby
But I promise momma's gon' be alright
Mockingbird, by Eminem
Prologue: March 15, 2010
I ran faster than I think I ever had in my entire life. I would have taken my car if the fucking thing wasn't parked 10 minutes from the front of this stupid office. I truly regretting taking this job now just for that reason.
I ran hard, and I could hear each labored breath that came out through my dried up lips. It was cold today. I couldn't really feel it though. I just need to get there. I knew this was a possibility, but I always thought that it could never happen to her. To me. To us. To my family.
I finally arrive to the place where my whole family currently is. A hospital. I really fucking hate hospitals. I never ever wanted to come in one of these places ever since that day so many years ago. That is why Bella had a home birth for me. Two times.
I hesitate at the front door of the hospital, and feel like I could throw up. Thousands of images flash through my mind, and they are all from that night. I feel like I shouldn't remember that anymore. It is in the past. This is the present. This is the present, and my wife needs me. My children need me. I've already failed them enough.
I take deep breath and push every bad thought from my mind. Just think about Bella's face, Edward. Just think about your beautiful children's face. Think about how scared they must be right now. That is your fault. Go fix it.
I walk into the hospital and walk straight to the front desk. My mind is focused on my family and nothing else…for now.
I approach the desk and the woman behind it looks like she would rather be anywhere but here right now. Don't we all.
"I need to know the room number for Isabella Cullen." I tell the woman, and she has the nerve to roll her eyes at me. What the fuck?
"And are you related?" She asks and pops her gum.
"I am her husband." I tried to stay as calm as I could. There is no need to just flip out on this woman.
"Room 315." She says and I run to the elevators and make my way to the third floor. I keep my eyes closed and my mind focused the whole time. I need to hold it together.
The doors open and I make my way to Bella's room. I stopped dead in my tracks, however, when I heard two of the most beautiful voices calling my name as I was passing the waiting room.
"Daddy!" I heard my little boy and little girl yell after me. I look behind me, and see Liam and Peyton staring at me with raw fear in their eyes. I feel my heart explode with pain, and I walk back over to my children.
I squat down in front of them, and they both latch onto my neck and start crying. I feel my head clear up, and my mind ease as I hold my children in my arms. Things aren't perfect though, when I know my love is just down the hall, probably in pain. I turn my head and kiss each of theirs.
It feels good to have them both in my arms, but it felt especially good to have Liam in my arms. Even though he declared that he hated me and wished I wasn't his father, it was still good to know that deep down, he didn't really mean it, and he still will come to me when he is feeling scared.
"Shh, you guys, please stop crying." I plead with them. My heart couldn't take their tears. It reminded me of their pain, and what they just witnessed.
"Daddy, Mommy was shaking. She was shaking a lot." I heard my little girl tell me and I held onto her tighter. I didn't have a chance to respond, because a commotion came from down the hall and caused me to look up. I saw Emmett make his way toward with murder in his eyes.
"You filthy son of a bitch." He said as he approached me with his hands clenched at his sides. I saw my Dad walk out in between the both of us, and hold Emmett back, but Emmett fought against him.
I held on tighter to my children. "Not in front of them, Emmett. Please." I said as I looked him dead in the eye. I knew he hated me right now, and I deserved anything he wanted to do to me. But I also knew he loved my children and wouldn't want to hurt them. I saw him look at both of them and then calm down a little.
I looked off to my right and saw my Mom was looking on at the scene with her hand over her mouth, and tears running down her face. "Mom." I said and my voice cracked. "Can you take them down to get a snack at the vending machine, or something." I asked.
"No, Dad. Please stay with us." I heard Liam ask and my throat began to burn as I tried to swallow down the lump in my throat. I want so bad to have them stay with me, but I also didn't want them to see their Uncle yell at their father.
"I need to talk to Uncle Emmett, and go see your Mom and then I will be right back, alright buddy?" I asked and pushed his hair out of his face. "I love you, Liam. I need you to know that okay? I know that I have made a lot of mistakes, but I love you and your sister more than anything."
Peyton lifted her head from my shoulder and kissed my cheek. "We love you too, Daddy." My little girl told me. "Right, Liam?" She said and looked over at my son.
He stared at me, contemplating. "Yeah. I love you, Dad." He said and I felt a wave of warmth pass through my heart. It has been too long since I have heard those words from my son.
"Okay, so I will see you both later, okay? Just go with Nana." I said and they both nodded before walking out with my Mom. I looked after them, and when they were out of site, I felt large hands grab my collar and slam me against the wall.
"How many times did I tell you this was going to happen?" He asked rhetorically, and I tried to look anywhere but in his eyes. He slammed me back on the wall, and a sharp pain went to my head. "How many times!" He screamed in my face.
"Emmett, you really shouldn't be doing this." Carlisle said from my side. I wanted to tell him to not worry about it. I wanted to tell him I deserve this. I deserve to be yelled at. I deserve to be put down. I deserve for him to hit me. I deserve so much worse than any of that. I did this to them. I allowed this to happen.
Emmett looked at me fiercely, and then finally let go of me. "You are right; he is not worth my voice or my strength. But I am going to tell you something right fucking now, Edward. You better do something about this. Grow a fucking pair and do something!" He screamed and his face got redder. "Or I swear to God, Edward. I will find a way to make sure those kids are away from the both of you." He said and then turned around and left.
I knew he was right. I needed to do something this time. Not little things. I need to do something big. I need to change my methods. All of the other ways I have tried have been wrong.
My Dad tried to say something to me, but I stopped him. "Can I just go see her, Dad? Please just let me see her." I plead with him. He must have noticed the desperation in my eyes and then led me to her room.
He patted me on the back at the door, and then I opened the door. I looked over at my beautiful wife. I walked closer to her and grabbed her small hand in mine. She looked pale and as sick as ever. It killed me to see her like this. She has always been so strong. My savior. My love.
"Why did you have to do this to us, my love?" I asked and the tears finally started falling down my cheeks. "I have tried so damn hard for us, baby. Why couldn't you just help me?" I held her hand close to my heart that was breaking below her palm. "I love you so much, Bella. I just wish it was enough. I wish it was enough to fix you. There is nothing in this world that I want more."
This is only the prologue and this will take place later in the story. Please tell me what you think so I know if I should continue writing or not. Review Please!