I watch Bella pull out of the drive in her truck. I hated her, unlike everyone else apparently. Everyone who seemed to know her loved her, but not me. I hate her, and probably will hate her forever. I hated her mostly because what she did to Jake, but other than that she just bugs me. I wait a moment, everyone is silent. I finally turn to Billy. "Can I go see him after Sam is done?" I ask and Billy nods and I rush in.
I run into Sam in the kitchen. He just came out of Jake's room. "Leah…" he says softly, I close my eyes and I'm taken with a flashback from my past.
Sam and I were on the beach. I was watching the surf roll in from his arms. He nuzzled my neck and would kiss it softly every couple of seconds. He would murmur my name through the kisses. He was trying to get me to say I'd marry him. I had been teasing him all day saying, "I'm not ready", "We are too young", and "People would get the wrong idea". Truth was I wanted to marry him more than anything in the world, but I enjoyed teasing him, so I would tell him some other day when he asked me. He kissed me again and murmured my name and then another kiss. He tightened his arms around me and he nuzzled my hair. He lingered there for a while before returning to my neck. I leaned into him and continued to watch the waves. I wasn't going to say yes today, but I would say yes any other day he asked me.
That was the last day before Emily came into town. That was the last day he would ever ask me to marry him. That was the last day he would truly kiss me.
I open my eyes and see Sam really close to me. His face was full of worry (and the usual hurt). "Leah," he says my name again and I shake off the flashback. "You scared me." He says.
"Sorry," I mutter and walk to Jake's door. I place my hand on the doorknob but I don't turn it yet.
"Did you ever really love me?" I practically whisper and I slowly turn to him.
"Of course," he practically whispers back. "I still do Leah."
I give him a small smile and I turn to the door. I'm still unable to turn the knob. "I would have married you, ya know?" I say but I don't face him. I'm unable to face him.
"I know," he says and I turn to him as he nods. I meet his eyes and for the first time I notice something that I've been blocking out. His eyes hold love and care along with the hurt. I give him a small smile and I turn the knob and walk into Jake's room.
I close the door behind me. I look to Jake and he's all wrapped up. He looks like he's in so much pain and it makes me want to cry.
I pull a chair beside his bedside and I sit beside him. I tell him everything about Sam and what just happened. I tell him how it made me feel. I rant about how much I hate Bella. I talk to him about everything.
I look down to him and he looks so peaceful. I run my fingers through his hair instinctively. Immediately, I love the way his soft hair feels between my fingers.
"Damn it Jake! Why did you have to go after that newborn? I could have handled it." I say and continue to play with his hair. I look down to him. "Okay, that's a lie. I wasn't handling it. You saved my life Jake. You need to get better because you are my best friend Jake."
Jake moves and a huge smirk comes across his face. "It's about time Leah!" He smiles. I pull my hand out of his hair after I realized it was still in there.
"How much of that did you hear Jacob?" I ask.
"I've been awake the whole time," his smile grows and I get mad at him. He just sat there and let me spill all my secrets. I let my guard down, and he was just smiling. "I have to admit I think you are a little bit jealous of Bella."
"Jealous of Bella?" I say skeptically. He nods. "I am not jealous of Bella." I spit at him. "You go right ahead and follow her like a good loyal puppy. I don't give a damn." I say and turn to walk away. He grabs my arm and stops me. I turn and look down to him.
"Leah, it's over between Bella and me." He says softly as if that's going to fix everything.
I pull my arm away. "Well good for you, that fact still doesn't dissolve the fact that you pretended to be asleep to hear everything. I can't believe you Jake."
His smile grows. "It was interesting, and I had no idea that you still felt that strongly towards Sam." His arrogance was growing immensely, and soon he would say something he would regret, that's just how Jake is. Act first, think later. "Maybe he'll have an affair with you on the side Leah. Maybe he'll give you that kid you've always wanted. That sounds good Leah."
I slap him across his face as my eyes begin to burn. "You're such a jerk Jacob!" I raise my voice and rush out of the room.
I rush through the house trying to get away.
"Leah!' Billy calls. I stop at the door.
"Sorry Billy, I- I can't stay for dinner." I say and I rush out of the house. Once I get outside I morph into my wolf form and I run. I run anywhere just to get away and so people can't see me cry.