"I cried like a baby at the Keller wedding."
That simple confession had spurred so many charged feelings between us. We had kissed like we were drowning and only the other had oxygen to give. I had kissed him without fully grasping who it was I was kissing. All I knew was that it felt right kissing Kevin. When I pulled away to breathe it felt like I needed him more than air.
That night after the bar we had stumbled through the dark rain back to the Volvo stopping at random intervals to continue kissing. At one such interval he had me pressed against the tree near the car kissing me like we wouldn't make it the extra 10 feet. He pulled me tighter against him and let his lips travel down my neck.
Before we actually managed to continue on he pulled back and stared into my eyes. His expression was nearly unreadable. His eyes held wonder and marvel and yet also regret. At the time I couldn't think any more of it. He lifted his hand slowly and brushed my cheek. I leaned into his tender touch as the rain dripped down both our faces.
His lips touched mine in a motion so soft, so special that it felt as though my heart would break and swell too large at the same time. Terrible yet wonderful.
Later after the heat of passion had been flushed from our system we lay in the back seat. Dressed once again and just cuddling. It was strange. Kevin was supposed to be the one man that I'd never have feelings for. And yet there I was, lying with my cheek against his grey t-shirt. The fabric was soft and worn.
Kevin had one arm around my shoulders resting on my waist and the other grasping my hand on his chest. A position of protection and love. Wait, love?
His chest rose and fell slowly, indicating he was asleep. I sat up and looked at him. Without his conscious shields his expression was one that was content and happy without and misgivings. There were traces of sadness but he seemed at peace. I traced my fingers down his cheek and watched as he smiled under my hand.
A smile graced my lips as I lay back down and drifted into a comfortable sleep.