I don't own Alice in Wonderland or any of its characters. Based on the 2010 Tim Burton film.

Rated M for explicit adult content. Special warning - non-consensual sex and bdsm. Not terribly hardcore but some readers may want to stay away from this.

Special thanks to Ngoc Chau for the title, ideas for improvements, and proofing. Her support was marvelous and above and over what I asked of her.

I also want to thank HarryMasonFan for reading, proofing and for constructive opinions and good points for improvement.

Tarrant gets furiously jealous when Alice returns to Underland and begins seeing a royal courtier He kidnaps her with the goal of making her see that she belongs with him.

Eat Me, Drink Me

She's mine. I've known this since even before she slayed the Jabberwocky. She's meant to be with me. Forever. She left, yes, as she said that she had unfinished business. She wanted to take her father's dream and make it reality. I understood that. It was so hard to let her go, but I had to. She's supposed to be with me! But I had to let her go and take her at her word that she would come back.

I waited. I waited; and Time, the slurvish son of a bugger that he was, made the wait painful and long. Oh, so long! My tea parties were no fun. No-one had any good jokes and then the ingrates didn't even have the common decency of a slug to laugh at mine. Of course, with my bleak appearance and faded colours, how could they? Well, they could have at least tried! And Thackery, who is usually so wild and enthusiastic; the little scut bastard decided to join Mally in melancholy. Ooh! Two M's.

I could always count on Mally to cheer me before. But now she just gazed into her tea cup and didn't even look me in my eyes most of the time. Could it be that my eye colour wasn't to her liking? So what? I wasn't going to hurt her, the silly thing! She was my best friend. But even she seemed to leave me. Well. This was no good at all! But it would be. It would be again. When Alice came back.

And she did come back! Oh, that happy day! She came back just last week! And oh, what a tea party we had. My Alice and me. Oh, and the others, I suppose. But Alice was back! She ran straight into my open arms and brightened clothes colours and I know my eyes were that emerald green that she loved because she smiled that special smile that she smiled whenever she saw them. That soft, lush, pink smile with her lips curved upward ever so slightly at their right side. And her beautiful blue eyes shone with her happiness.

She told us of all her adventures in China, India, and a few places I cannot recall the names of. She even brought tea for me; a whole big bag! And she brought me beautiful fabrics and laces and ribbons and lots of new thimbles and sundries.

I couldn't wait. I had to ask. I had to ask her if she was going to stay. She looked surprised that I would ask such a thing. She looked right into my eyes and licked her lips. That tiny pink kitten tongue passing over those lush, sweet, should-be-mine-to-kiss-right-now Lips! And she said yes, that of course she was here to stay!

I hadn't been so happy in so long that I couldn't remember when I had been so happy!

Except for today. My Alice and I had gone shopping in the merchant's centre behind the White Queen's Castle. Of course I insisted she buy whatever she wanted. She tried to say she didn't need anything, but I would hear none of that. I had plenty of money. After only a few protestations from my sweet darling she at last chose items that pleased her. Books, a few pieces of jewelry, some makeup, and a few packages of dried Underland fruits that I recommended to her.

And of course she wore one of the new dresses I had made for her. Just for her. A new pink dress, shoes, and, of course, a hat with an off-centre fabric rose that I had spent hours on. She was radiant, my darling was! And every time a man's head was turned to look at her I shot a warning glare to their too attentive eyes. And they all quickly looked away. No-one, not even a courtier of the Queen's, was going to rest his unworthy gaze upon My Alice!

But later we were obliged to visit Queen Mirana. It was always a pleasure to visit Mirana. Well, almost always. But today she was having another one of her insufferable little tea parties. Her parties are too formal for my taste. But with My Alice at my side it was actually a pleasure. Until Mirana suggested we play croquet.

I tried hard to not groan. Croquet! Inevitably that meant that there were teams. And Mirana placed me on a different team than Alice's! How could she do that? Separate me from my Alice! And not only that, but the man on her team was impertinent enough to flirt with her! But what stung my heart was that My Alice smiled back and even let the scurvy slurvish cad put his hands over hers to correct her grip! How dare he TOUCH WHAT'S MINE?

It took everything I had to remain calm and not strangle the loathsome, leering, lascivious lout! I felt my eyes flash dangerous colours, but I was able to finally calm myself by remembering that My Alice was coming home with me! She slept in my house. In my guest bedroom that was really a true Alice Room. I had replaced every piece of furniture, especially the bed. I got her a brand new bed made by the finest craftsman the Queen had. I made sure he carved lots of flowers into the headboard. Alice loved it! But of course she wouldn't need to stay in that room for long. Soon, she would be All Mine. Soon. Very soon.

But the man persisted and touched and smiled at My Alice far too many times. At last I could take no more. If I hadn't left the game and took refuge in my Workroom in the palace I would have gone Very Mad Indeed. Probably would have beat the lout to within an inch of his life. Or more! I'd see any man dead before he'd take My Alice from me!

After coming to me in my Workroom, which I should have anticipated but did not, My Alice tried to calm me and tell me that everything was fine. How could she say that!

"He touched you!" I told her. "That man touched you and you allowed it!"

Alice looked into my face, puzzled. Even the tiny furrow in her brow appeared. "Yes, but he was just helping me with my grip, Tarrant."

I felt my knees grow weak. Whenever she said my name I went weak. Either weak or... I had to shake my head to clear Those Thoughts away.

"I didn't like it, Alice," I said truthfully. "I didn't like it at all!"

She gently took my hands, my bandaged and work-roughened hands, into her own soft and delicate ones. "Tarrant, it's all right, truly it is. I have no interest in him. Is that what you are so afraid of? That I may become interested in a man here?"

I swallowed and I felt my eyes betray my fear. My hands began to sweat and she looked down at them but clasped them more tightly rather than release them.

"Tarrant," she said, "I have returned here from a society that was trying to force me to marry against my will. Believe me when I say that being with any man, at least right now, is the last thing I want."

Her words, her innocent words meant to comfort me, had the opposite effect. Any man? Even...even me? I should have asked her, but I couldn't. What if she rejected me? And I had waited so long for her! But...maybe she wouldn't reject me. But I would have to be certain of that. How could I make certain of that?


I refocused my eyes and looked down into her oh-so-beautiful Alice eyes. "Yes, My Alice?" I heard the lisp in my voice and was embarrassed until she smiled.

"I love that gentle lisp of yours," she whispered and caressed my hands before releasing them. "Everything is all right. Everything will be all right. Trust me."

I smiled at her and wrapped her in a hug. She happily nestled her head against my chest, sending feelings of warmth throughout my body. Oh, yes, everything would indeed be all right. I would make certain of that. I just had some thinking to do.

That croquet cad was at it again. Alice and I couldn't even take a quiet and private stroll through the palace gardens without interruption of some sort. Lord Primsal or some such rubbish name. He had the unmitigated gall to walk right up to us and not even ask if he was intruding. He just began to talk to Alice as if I wasn't there as her proper escort! But Alice didn't seem to mind his company, no matter what she had said that day in my Workroom. She was all smiles and dimples and sweetness.

And over the course of the next few weeks Alice met with Lord Primsal numerous times. They even dined together. She began to refer to him as Sebastian. She continued to tell me it was nothing serious, but she seemed genuinely pleased every time she returned home after seeing him. I tried very hard to not be angry in front of her. I tried even harder to conceal my jealousy.

Thankfully, My Alice didn't notice my feelings. She was busy meeting people and acclimating to Marmoreal and seeing...him. So I wasn't surprised that she couldn't or wouldn't see my hurt. She actually liked this young bounder. This young bounder who had never seen an honest day's work in his entire, pathetic life. He was sounding more and more like the Hamish she had refused Above. Couldn't she see that? That he was the same as the very man and men she had left behind?

Was she actually going to succumb to his charms? I didn't see any charms; any at all, but it seemed that My Alice did! No, this would not do at all. Not. At. All.

The Perfect Opportunity came. Queen Mirana was soon going to send out various Craftsmen to scout out trading opportunities in the villages that were being rebuilt and repopulated after Iracebeth's downfall. Alice and I were going together and since Alice was so new here, that despite her skills in negotiations, she was being sent to observe only and learn the ways of Underland before Mirana would place her in a Post.

I would be able to stop off anywhere with her easily. And then I would show her that she and I are meant to be together. That I am hers and she is mine. I would prepare all the herbs and "borrow" any available potions from Mirana's store that I would need.

I prepared my old "I want to be by myself and no-one is invited here ever but me" cabin that I had built during the times when Alice would come to Underland as a child. I was sometimes depressed between her visits and wanted to be utterly alone. No-one, not even Mally, knew about this place. It was for me and for me only. Well, except that it would be for me and My Alice very shortly. There, I would show her how much I loved her and needed her and would teach her everything she didn't know about the arts of love.

Likely I would have to force her at first, but I wouldn't harm her. Never. But I knew that she would likely be frightened at first. So I had placed a special "hook" for her, had plenty of smooth rope, and even a chain with a manacle to fasten to a post of my bed.

I placed all the foodstuffs, herbs, potions, and other sundries we would need while there. And I added some things that would absolutely scandalize her, if she could even guess their intended usages! I have to admit that some even scandalized me a bit, and I'm off my head! But I was eager to try them, and couldn't wait to be able to get past My Alice's fear and to her pleasure. Now, all I needed was a quick trip to the Queen's library to brush up on the pleasures of women, just to be sure I would get everything right. I knew that Mirana had numerous books on the subject of love and physical love and I would find anything I needed.

Soon. Very soon we would both be here. Alone. Just the two of us. Just My Alice and me.

Some plans work out so easily it is almost frightening, even to me, and I'm Mad, so I should be more easily frighted than anyone, right? All I had to do was accompany Alice a day's journey, tell her to send the Bandersnatch back to Marmoreal and that I would call for horses in the morning. We were close to the cabin so I unpacked a light supper for us. Of course I put a small amount of sleeping draught into her food. She may or may not fall asleep. It didn't matter. She would be very easy to handle, regardless, until I had her exactly where I wanted her.

And she was. Ridiculously easy. She was almost asleep, but not quite. She was so drowsy that she could barely keep her eyes open. I soothed her and carried her into the cabin, telling her that it was one I had built for myself long ago. She snuggled endearingly into me while I carried her inside and kicked the door shut behind me.

Well, I was nervous, but I had to go on. I didn't quite have each and every step planned out, but I basically knew what I wanted to do and pretty much in what order. I carried her into the room I had completely cleared save for an old sofa and the special hook with a dangling chain in the ceiling I had placed there for Alice. A table behind the sofa had the implements I would need, or possibly need, for her.

Alice was so close to being asleep that she was not as easy to undress as I had thought. She was limp weight. Still, she was light and the task wasn't so difficult. I wanted to admire every inch of her lovely, nubile body but I would have plenty of time for that later. Oh, yes. Plenty of time.

I had her completely and so utterly beautiful and luscious and naked in just a few minutes. Her eyes were closed and I could see that she was asleep. I tied both of her wrists separately, and then together. Then I looped the remaining rope through a chain link to keep her standing practically on her toes. There; yes. She was stretched beautifully. And I could easily adjust how high or low she would be by simply moving the rope through another link any time I wished.

Well, what now? She was asleep. But I hadn't given her much of a dosage. I hadn't meant to begin to touch her while she was asleep, but I couldn't help myself. Of their own volition my hands went right to those peach-like breasts and began to squeeze and knead. Oh, how perfectly delightful! I closed my eyes and ran my palms over her rosy nipples and was so pleased when they became pebble hard in moments. I then ran my hands over her arms, her legs, and then back to her middle. I would save the best part for last and for when she was awake. But her smell... It was too intoxicating to resist. I was about to grasp her legs to part them when she began to stir.

I waited patiently until she slowly woke up and began to take in her predicament. After her initial cries of embarrassment and mortification, she was angry and flustered and then, as I had anticipated, she began to ask me the inevitable questions while tugging vainly against the rope.

"Tarrant! What are you doing? Why are you doing this to me? What do you want?"

I moved to her and put my hand over her mouth. "Alice, My Alice, I will answer your questions. But in time. I will tell you something right now, though. It is all really quite simple. You and I are meant to be together forever. I am yours and you are mine. And since you don't seem to fully realise that yet I'm going to help you. I am going to prove to you that you are mine and to not even look at another man in the way you looked at Lord Whoever-he-is again."

"You see, you are a Champion, but you are still innocent. Too innocent to see the truth. It is my duty as your soul-love to slowly remove the very innocence that keeps you from seeing the Truth. When you do see it, all this will end. But, there is a price, my darling. I have to take your innocence. All of it. I need to fully make you a woman."

I saw her eyes grow wider and wider during my explanation. She tried to protest but I pressed my hand to her mouth harder. "Alice, I won't let you speak now. Later, perhaps, I will. Now, you will be a good girl and not speak until I tell you that you may, or I will gag you. Is that what you want?"

She violently shook her head no. I smiled. "So, you agree to not speak?"

She nodded and I slowly withdrew my hand. "Now, this is the first step, my love. I have you here, and we are completely alone and isolated. No-one can find us and no-one can hear you if you scream. Keep that in mind. Now, for the second step. This is where you learn that you cannot hide from me, My Alice. You are completely naked and exposed and I can and will touch you and caress you and do anything I like to you. And you have to fully accept that before I can move on. Do you understand?"

Alice swallowed hard and nodded slowly. "Now what?" she asked, and then bit her lip. "I'm sorry," she whispered.

"I forgive you this time, Alice, but don't speak again. Now, I get to examine my wife-to-be. My soul-love. If you relax this will be easy for you, my dear. I want you to enjoy this." I grinned. "I know I will."

She gasped and I saw her eyes mist with tears. I hated that. But I knew that my taking and her giving her innocence would be unnerving for her. I smiled again to reassure her. I began by touching her long and silky golden hair. Her curls were a pleasure to run my fingers through. The smooth texture teased my fingers as I played with her hair and wound it around my fingers time and again before reluctantly releasing the tresses. She had calmed somewhat. Good. That's what I wanted. I didn't want her to be frightened. At least not too frightened.

I was glad that I had unbandaged and lotioned my hands. I could feel her very well despite my callouses. I then gently stroked her cheeks with my thumbs and she closed her eyes and swallowed again. Was this a good sign? She was flushed now, from her face to her breasts. But she seemed to enjoy my touch. At least I think she did.

I caressed her face until she almost drowsed against my fingers. I didn't want that so I drew my hands away and slid my fingers down her long, delicate throat. She started but kept herself from speaking. I then traced my fingertips down to her breasts. Ah, yes; her breathing quickened and the ripe mounds rose and fell with each breath. I cupped them and lightly squeezed them, causing her to gasp. I squeezed harder and she gasped again. I ran my palms over her already hard nipples and she struggled against her bonds uselessly. Then I saw her eyes flash with anger.

"Tarrant, I demand you stop this at once! Release me!"

I sighed. If only she had obeyed the rule of silence. "You give me no choice now, My Alice." I went

"I have the perfect gag, just for you, Alice. This will effectively silence you, and you will please me at the same time You need to be punished. You disobeyed the rule you promised to hold! You obey, you receive pleasure. You disobey, you receive punishment. Simple, yes?"

"No, stop...whatever it is you're going to do! Just let me go and we'll never speak of this again!"

I slowly undressed and once more had the pleasure of seeing those gorgeous blue eyes of hers widen. As I dropped and kicked each article of clothing aside I noticed that she did not close those eyes once. In fact, she flushed anew. I could smell her sex now. I could smell her beginning to moisten between those stretched and vulnerable thighs. So, she approved of my body! Well, I was strong and lean and well muscled with years of fighting training and working at my Trade. Undoubtedly she hadn't expected to see me so muscular and in such fine physical condition.

I grinned and stepped close to her and grasped the rope. I was easily tall enough to release it from the link it was currently in and move it lower. Low enough to have her on her knees before me, her arms still tied awkward above and behind her. I grasped my erection and brought the tip of it near her pretty pink mouth.

"Now, Alice, I know you are innocent, but probably you are not ignorant. However, in the event that you are, this is called a penis. And it is very hard, which means that I need relief from the sexual tension that has built up inside of me. One way to do that is for me to use my hand and rub and stroke it until I have what is known as an orgasm. But since you are here I'll not have to resort to such a crude and lonely method. Oh, no. You can help me, Alice. You can help me with that lovely mouth of yours. You see, I can insert it into your mouth, which I will open, and the feeling of sliding it past your lips and along your tongue and perhaps, deeper, will pleasure me immensely. Then I'll move in and out until I come. Now, you can either co-operate by using your tongue on me to help me with my pleasure, or you can be stubborn and I'll be inside your mouth longer. Either way I'll have my pleasure."

Alice groaned in a mixture of fear and wonder. But she kept her mouth resolutely closed. I sighed. Very well. I grasped her lower jaw with one hand and pinched her nose with the other until she had to open. Then I forced the tip of my hard cock past her lips. I wasn't afraid that she would bite me. I knew she would never do that. However...just in case, I firmly kept a hold on her jaw. I could see the curiosity in her eyes, but it slowly changed to nervousness. I know I'm on the large side where manhood is concerned and Alice will have a difficult time with me at first. But that's all right. She'll have plenty of time to practice. Plenty. But for now...

I...oh...her mouth! Even though she wasn't accommodating me willingly, as her muffled squeals of protest let me know, she felt so warm and incredible. Her kitten tongue couldn't decide whether to try and flee my member or attempt to touch and taste it. But I didn't care. Her mouth...so small and incredibly accommodating! I began to thrust. She squealed in protest but I pressed on. In fact, I more than pressed on. I couldn't help myself! I had intended to go slowly but her mouth was just too enticing and I had been fantasizing about this for far too long. Her tongue couldn't decide what to do but I was beyond caring at this point. I grasped the back of her head with my free hand and began to pump in earnest. Harder, faster, and deeper.

Oh, by the White, this felt good! No, more than good! This was My Alice's mouth! It felt incredible! I pumped more furiously and then I felt her throat muscles involuntarily clench around me. I was gagging her! I tried to slow down, but I couldn't. I held her head tighter and continued pumping as Alice kept making unintelligible sounds of distress and when I looked down I saw tears streaming from her eyes. But I couldn't help it, the pleasure was too great! She gagged some more and the feeling around my cock intensified and before I knew or wished it I was spurting down her throat. My knees got very weak and I struggled to remain standing. I held her mouth tightly to my pelvis and Alice coughed and choked and had no choice but to swallow my seed. The very idea of that gave me a slurvish sort of satisfaction. What was better, however, was that I intended to give her a great deal more practice at orally pleasing me.

I slowly began to withdraw as my member shrank and Alice gulped in great gasps of air. There was some of my cum dribbling down her chin and I used my finger to push it into her mouth and she obediently swallowed it.

"Very good, Alice," I said truthfully and leaned forward to brush the tears from her eyes. "I can honestly say that I don't remember when I have ever had such pleasure in this manner. You are a wonder, My Alice."

She looked at me with a mixture of emotions. Fear, indignation, relief, and also...yes...arousal! She was smelling stronger of it than ever, willing or not. I stood and retied the rope into a higher link and then pulled her legs up and over my shoulders. She looked positively horrified.

"Alice," I said, "I know I said that I had to punish you with my "gag". I hope you don't think I was trying to punish you by having you orally please me while I was...being so eager, however. But I think you may believe that and I shouldn't have been so forceful. For that, you shall have a reward. That is, I will now pleasure you. I promise that you'll like this very much indeed!"

I gazed at her delicate pink folds, her already opened slit, and her tiny, erect little nubbin. She was also very wet. Her musky Alice-Scent pleasantly assailed my nose and I moved closer to smell of her more deeply. And I did. Oh, divine scent of My aroused Alice! I teasingly rubbed the tip of my nose against her little knob and she shivered and gasped. I smiled. Oh, yes, she was enjoying this very much! Even if she would not admit it.

First I stroked and teased her inner thighs with my fingers and lips. She continued to respond very positively to this. I licked and sucked on her flesh and even made sure I would leave a mark or two. Then I inched closer and closer to her centre. She was trying to squirm. I now teased my index finger up and down her slit, causing her eyes to roll back in her head and her body to shudder. I smiled widely. I then touched her fully aroused clit and pressed down firmly. She gasped loudly in obvious pleasure.

Yes, she was more than ready. I slid a finger inside of her, then two. I moved them in and out a few times, and then bent and scissored them a little to begin to widen her. I had every intention of using that opening again just a little later. But for now she continued to quiver and even began to pant. I withdrew my fingers and licked them clean. Oh yes, she tasted of arousal and musk and welcoming, non-sentient flowers and, of course, Alice.

I pressed my mouth to her fully and began to lave my tongue all over her, between every fold, up and down her slit, into her opening, and finally on the tiny nub that was her nerve centre. She struggled and quivered and every inch of her erupted in goose-flesh. I heard a distinct whimper of delight when I closed my mouth on her clit and sucked hard. If she could have, she would been writhing by now. I bit down a little harshly on her tender flesh but that was all she needed to have the first orgasm of her life.

Alice gasped, she trembled, she groaned and shook. And she gushed beautifully in her release. I lapped up her fluids greedily and then when I returned to her clit and sucked again, she came again. I could hear her gasp of surprise and delight when she did. I grinned. She had so much to learn! And I would be the one to teach her!

I carefully removed her legs and left her standing on the balls of her feet. Just to tease her I leaned in and kissed her as I fingered her sex again.

"Oh!" she squeaked, but offered no protest. My tongue teased and twined with hers as I fingered her wet sex and she came again, crying out and whimpering into my mouth. I slowly broke the kiss and she seemed to feel disappointed that I did.

"Oh, My Alice, I love you so much!" I told her, kissing her throat now. "And there is just one more thing we have to do before we retire for the night."

She looked at me and I could see that she didn't know whether or not to be afraid. She just swallowed hard again and gave me a questioning look.

"My Alice," I whispered, and bent to kiss her nipples and slide my fingers to her moist centre, "I need to have your chastity."

She gasped and I felt her heart begin to pound furiously beneath her breasts and saw the pulse quicken in her throat. She shook her head and looked pleadingly into my eyes. I saw tears well there and I kissed them away as tenderly and reassuringly as I could.

"Shhh...My Alice, I need to. For several reasons. I love you, I need you, and I need you to fully understand that we belong together and that we belong to each other. I'll do my best to not hurt you, my soul-love."

Alice started to cry and it wrenched at my heart. I tried to soothe her, telling her how I loved her more than life, than all of Underland, more than my own soul. After a time her tears slowed but she still didn't look pleased. I hadn't expected her to be pleased, but I felt better now that she was no longer crying. Of course I knew that a young lady about to lose her virginity would be frightened. I would do my very best to make it pleasurable for her.

Well, at least she was thoroughly wet and ready for me physically. She was no longer crying and seemed to understand that this was going to happen and that I didn't want to hurt her. I lifted her legs and held them alongside my hips. Then I gently pressed my new erection to her sweet opening.

"I'll go slowly and gently, My Alice. This will hurt, but not for long. I'll be as tender and careful as I can." I felt my eyes glow Green-Golden, as my Love for her surfaced. But also, I felt lust and desire, so I knew the tell-tale flecks of white were also present.

I pressed into her carefully and she whimpered and her body tensed in discomfort. I caressed her thighs and then used one hand to enjoy cupping and kneading her breasts. When she relaxed I pressed in deeper. She tensed again and I resumed my ministrations, this time with one hand on one breast and the other at her sex. I used my thumb to press and caresses her wet little clit and I saw her eyes dilate in momentary pleasure. It didn't last because of her pain, but I kept it up, knowing that it was helping her nonetheless. I pressed in deeper and her struggles against the bonds told me that she was at the maximum level her pain would reach. I stilled and continued to whisper soothing words to her, to stroke her breast and rub against her little nub and then stroke her all around my member.

Alice choked back a sob and slowly began to gasp and pant. I pushed deeper and knew that now I had to go all the way into her. Up to the hilt, as it were. I pushed once, firmly, and locked my pelvis against her body. She panted rapidly and blinked away tears but didn't seem to be in too much pain. I stayed still for several long moments, continuing to try and ease her discomfort with my hands. At last I heard her panting slow and so I began to withdraw slowly, seeing her eyes show relief. But she knew this was only the beginning. And so did I. I was cherishing every moment. Every single moment I was inside My Alice was precious. And this would be the only "first time" she would ever have. I wanted to please her.

I thrust forward into her again, but slowly, slowly. Then I began to pump in and out, again, slowly. I saw her wincing in discomfort, but at last her tears were gone and she began to respond, moving her hips slightly. Her position kept her from moving much, but it was movement all the same. She was responding!

I brought both of my hands to her sex and began to play with her soft folds as I moved in and out of her. I felt my own climax approaching but I didn't want to come! Alice wasn't there yet! And she had to be or I would go on until she was! Her soft and welcoming Inside was so tight and warm and it seemed to squeeze my cock every time I thrust; as if it were trying to milk me of my fluids! Oh, no, that couldn't happen just yet! I gritted my teeth. Not yet!

I stopped for a few moments to collect myself and I focused on her clitoris. I rubbed and pressed my thumb against it and then I pinched it between my thumb and second finger. She gasped loudly then and I knew she was close! I continued to pinch her and press and then I was thrusting into her once more. At last I felt her body tense as it hadn't before and I knew she was coming. I closed my eyes and pushed into her, hard and quick and then groaned as I heard her cry of pleasure and then I climaxed and did all I could to remain standing! Oh, Alice's orgasm with the loss of her chastity and mine coming at the very same time; it was magical! It was meant to be! It meant I was doing all the right things, taking all the right steps to make her realise that we belonged together!

Alice closed her eyes and her panting and heavy breathing began to slow. I withdrew from her and rushed to the bathroom to wet the towel. I went to her and very gently dabbed away her blood and carefully pressed the towel to her sex to try and soothe her ache. She kept her eyes closed. I then returned to the bathroom and washed the towel and then cleaned myself. Alice's blood. Her precious blood on my member. I had taken her virginity, and she had to give it to me in order to be made a woman in every way. Then she would be open to the Truth.

I returned to Alice and then carefully released her from her bondage and she sagged. I caught her and carried her to my bedroom. I laid her on the bed. She opened her eyes and made sounds of pain so I quickly began to massage her stiffened limbs and joints. As she slowly relaxed I mused on what to do now.

"My Alice, it is time for us to sleep. Now, I can't have you running away, can I? So, I'll give you a choice. You can sleep in the bed without me and wear this," and I held up a device that made her cringe. It was a sort of stock. It was a board that would open to enclose her neck and both of her wrists. That would render her helpless as I was also going to manacle one of her ankles to the chain that I had affixed to a leg of my bed.

"You may speak now, Alice. But be careful of what you say."

"Please, Tarrant, don't make me...don't put that on me. What is my other choice?"

"I shall tie your hands in front of you, manacle one of your ankles, and you can share the bed with me. And don't worry, I will only hold you through the night."

She didn't even hesitate. "I'll take the second choice."

I smiled and leaned down to kiss her. She didn't respond, but neither did she flinch away. "I'm glad, my darling one. My Alice."

When I awoke it was slowly, and to the most pleasurable feeling. My naked Alice was curled into me, her back to my front and we had slept with my arms around her. But what awoke me was the sensation of her little backside pushing into my groin. I didn't move, as I feared awakening her. She sighed softly and nestled even more tightly into me. Oh my, her slight movements and sounds were beginning to arouse me in a most delightful way! I backed my erection carefully away from Alice and tried to calm my desire. But...but...

I gently moved my left arm down to her breast and cupped it gently. Her bound wrists were only slightly in my way. I held my breath. She didn't wake, but I felt her nipple harden and she sighed again. Then she did the Unexpected. She turned and lay face to face with me. Her bound hands brushed against my erection and to my shock she smiled a small, but genuine smile. I couldn't help but kiss the top of her head tenderly and lovingly.

Then she woke up. Gasping, My Alice sat bolt upright. "Tarrant!" she gasped, "where...what..." And then she remembered. "Oh," she whispered. She was silent for quite some time and I was, too, wondering what she was thinking of. I sensed that something was going through her mind, but somehow I didn't sense that escape was what she was pondering.



She smiled slightly, obviously aware that I was willing to let her speak freely for now. "You said that if I behave I get rewarded, and if I misbehave I get punished?"

"That's right. Be a good girl and you'll see the Truth sooner and the sooner we can begin the rest of our lives together. If you are bad I will need to punish you, and you probably won't like my punishments; and then we'll be delayed in being able to leave here and begin our lives together as we should."

"I see," Alice said. "What sort of punishments are you talking about? Are you going to hurt me?"

"Well, you will likely experience discomfort and maybe some pain, yes, but hopefully also pleasure mixed with it. But hurt you as in real injury? No, Alice. You should know me better than that. But my punishments will definitely be sexual in nature, no doubt as you've already guessed but simply wanted to ascertain. Do you understand and believe me?"

"I...I do, Tarrant."

I thought for a few moments. It was time to rise for the day. I wonder if I asked Alice to pleasure me with her lovely mouth if she would? I sat up and wrapped my arms around her and kissed her. "I love you, My Alice. I was wondering if you would...would..."

"Yes, Tarrant?"

"If you would...pleasure me with your mouth. Freely. You don't have to if you don't want to."

Alice pondered a moment, and then nodded. "Yes, Tarrant. But try not to gag me. It makes my stomach lurch."

I smiled at her and lay back. Alice leaned over me and for a moment I could swear I saw something...devious in her gaze. As if she were planning something. But as soon as she took my cock into her practically watering mouth the thought was pushed aside. Was she actually wanting to do this? Oh, by the White! She locked her hot mouth around the tip of my shaft and moved her head up and down a few times, moistening it. Then I noticed she was listening for my sounds of pleasure to tell her what I liked and how and when. She used her tongue to tease me up and down my shaft, and even licked my tea-sack. Oh, how wondrous she was making me feel! And then...oh! She teased the tip of my erection and licked away the drops of my pre-cum and swallowed them and seemed to be pleased to do so.

Alice then opened her mouth and took me fully into her again, up and down and up and down. She used one of her bound hands to gently hold my skin downwards and she drew firmly upwards with her mouth and then pulled off of me slowly, making a popping sound. Then she resumed her sucking and teased my tea-sack some more with her fingers.

I involuntarily pressed my back firmly into the mattress as my climax began to build. "Oh, Alice, I'm almost...almost..."

"Let it go, Tarrant," she whispered. I did. I had to. Every muscle in my body tensed as every sensation in my body centered where her mouth was and I came violently and shuddered and cried out as Alice sucked and swallowed every drop of my seed. I couldn't believe it! She had given me this precious gift freely!

I lay still, letting my racing heart calm, and then...she lay beside me and kissed my cheek.

"Did you enjoy that, Tarrant?" she asked me cheekily, her eyes gleaming with an odd mischief and...satisfaction?

"You know bloody well I did!" I replied teasingly. We lay side by side for awhile in contentment and peace.

I untied Alice and let her use the bathroom for bathing and what-not while I got our breakfast ready. I was on high alert, however. She would not escape me. And I told her to dress only in her chemise and pantalettes. I wore only my robe. I retied her wrists but allowed space in the rope so she could eat and drink.

To my relief she did so. We ate our breakfast in comfortable silence. I sensed a surge of...muchness in her. I hadn't felt it very strongly yesterday, but that was no surprise to me. I had manhandled her, after all, and had frightened her. But I was glad her muchness was back. I wished her no lasting harm! I love her! She would just need some time to understand the Truth. And I would make her mine, completely mine, and she would gradually see the Truth as clearly as I did.

After breakfast I asked Alice to help me with the dishes. To my surprise, she complied willingly. We washed the dishes and dried them and she offered to put them away while I prepared a fresh pot of tea. I rose and she rose to follow me to the counter. She stood and watched me fetch the Earl Grey and prepare it. I turned to look at her. How lovely she was! How sweet and pale and golden and utterly alluring. Without thinking I leaned down to her and pressed my lips to hers. Her eyes flashed in anger and muchness and she bit my lip hard enough to draw blood.

"Damn you!" she cried out and then she was a flurry of scratching nails and kicking legs. I felt my eyes turn lime green in annoyance and I fought with her until I had her subdued, holding her wrists high over her head until she was stretched so much she was panting in fury and helplessness.

"Alice, you've been very naughty! You know I said I would punish you if you were naughty!" Minx! She had even managed to leave bloody claw marks on my neck and chest.

She glared at me defiantly and tried to kick me. Her legs flailed but she managed to kick me in the knee and, botheration, it hurt!

"Oh, you'll pay for that!" I growled, and for a moment I could swear that Alice shivered deliciously at my lowered voice. But perhaps it was my imagination, for the next moment she was not shivering but struggling against me again and I easily subdued her with one arm and I reached for a cookie with the other. A very special cookie. I pressed it to her mouth. "Open up and eat this!" I ordered. She closed her mouth obstinately. Very well. I set her down and pressed her back against the counter and held her head with one hand and pinched her nose until she had to part her lips for air and I shoved the cookie in. "You eat that or I swear you'll regret it!"

Alice's eyes gleamed with defiance, but after a moment she obediently ate the cookie. "What is that?" she asked.

"A sedative. It seems I need to tire you again while I prepare you for your punishment."

Alice swallowed hard and I felt a flash of her muchness again. "What are you going to do to me?"

"You'll find out soon enough. For awhile, however, except for placing you back on the chain I'm not going to do anything to you."

She was puzzled. "Wha...what? Nothing?"

"Mostly nothing," I said. Then I grinned and I could see the chill it sent down her spine. "But I'll enjoy it very much. I won't even gag you. And I'll even give you what you will want...perhaps. But you'll have to ask nicely."

She was still puzzled but I had no inclination to explain. She was already becoming listless. She still could have fought me, I think, but perhaps I was wrong. She didn't resist at all as I placed her back on the chain and stretched out those gorgeous limbs once more. And just for that little rope stunt earlier...I ripped her clothing completely off her body, destroying it. Her eyes widened. I just smiled.

"I'll be back, sweet one. I just have to fetch something to keep you...occupied... while you are in here."

"What do you mean?"

I ignored her. Yes, this would work perfectly. I returned to my beautifully vulnerable Alice. She stared in curiosity at the jar I held in my hand. I opened it and she saw the pale yellow paste inside. Before she could ask I said, "Alice, this will entertain you for awhile while I tidy up around here. Now, I want you to be quiet unless you feel like begging me to take you as I did yesterday. If you disobey I will gag you."

Alice closed her opened mouth. I took some of the paste and applied it to her nipples and then liberally between her legs. I even put a small amount inside her. She gasped and made an angry sound.

"Now, enjoy yourself. I'm going to clean up a bit and perhaps read. You just think about what you did and why you earned this punishment. But if you are good and you really, really need me, I'll be merciful and give it to you. Perhaps."

And then I left her alone. I went into the kitchen and cleaned up. Then I sat down and opened the latest issue of "Tea Connoisseur" and began to read. I wondered how long it would take for her to experience the sensations from the cream. It was really quite ingenious, actually, and mainly used to coerce prisoners into confessing their secrets, not used for sex, but then, I'm a very imaginative man. She would soon begin to itch unbearably and then feel a bit of a burning sensation. I once experimented with it upon myself and within half an hour I needed sexual release and physical contact so badly it drove me almost more Mad than normal. I smiled and began to read on the virtues of Thrackberry Tea.

I was into my third article when I heard sounds of frustration and distress coming from Alice. So, it was working perfectly! Oh, how delicious! I silently crept towards her and since she wasn't facing me from my place in the hall outside the kitchen she couldn't see me. She was squirming uncomfortably in her bonds and making sounds through gritted teeth. I saw that gorgeous little behind of her twitch and clench and her legs press tightly together as she tried in vain to relieve herself of the itching and burning sensations. She was positively gorgeous! A sheen of perspiration coated her body and her hair was damp. Oh, yes, she was suffering in a most exquisite way!

I casually strode in front of her. "Are you all right, My Alice?" I asked her innocently.

She glared at me. "What is this? It...itches! And it burns!"

"A very special paste, and it's doing just what it's designed to do," I replied. "After all, I didn't want you to be bored in here. Now you have something to focus on. If it's not enough I can get you more and put it all over your luscious little body."

"No! I mean, no. Tarrant, help me! This is..this is...unbearable!"

"Oh, my dear, you have no idea of what unbearable is!" I told her truthfully. "It was unbearable for me to wait so long for you to return. It was unbearable to see you with other men. It was unbearable for me to see you with that Lord Whoever-he-is, and not just once, but many times, and even for dinner! It was and is unbearable to me that you can't see how much I love and need you and that we should be together! You fight me every step of the way. You aren't seeing the Truth, thought you will in time. But the waiting... I can't live without you, Alice. And I won't! I'd rather die! And you are making me punish you!"

Alice was quiet for a moment. "Tarrant, I...I don't know what to say. But for now...please! Help me!" She squirmed more and panted as the effects on her body tormented her even more.

"How do you want me to help you, My Alice?"

"My breasts...they...touch me, please!"

"Very well, since you ask so nicely. I ran my hands over her breasts and her breathing quickened. Just days ago she would never have dreamed she would be asking a man to touch her breasts. I smiled. No, she never would have dreamed such a thing. And I know her breasts weren't all that was tormenting her. I lightly pinched her nipples and she gasped.

"Is this helping, Alice?"

"A...a little." More pants. "More! Harder! Please, Tarrant!" I obliged her. I handled her more roughly, pinching her nipples harder and squeezing her quivering mounds. She kept asking for more. I dared to squeeze her a bit harder, but I refused to injure her.

"Is this enough?"

"No! More!"

I continued to roughly handle her breasts and and alternated with squeezing her nipples until they were bright red. I stopped. "I have to stop or I may injure you," I said. "As it is you may bruise a little."

"I don't care!"

"I do."

"Well, then, can you...will you...touch me elsewhere?" I could see Alice's pride battling with her intense need.

"Where would you like me to touch you?"

I got another glare. "You know where!" she almost spat.

"Bad girl. I'm leaving now," I told her and began to walk away.

"No! Please, Tarrant. Don't leave! I need you to...to touch...my..."

"Your..." I prompted, my eyes filled with mischief as well as lust.


I smiled again. "Good girl. You asked very nicely." I stepped back and brought her legs over my shoulders and gazed at her femininity. I saw the irritated and swollen flesh there. And the intense amount of moisture. I began to stroke her and she sighed at once. I knew she still itched and burned, but she was finding some measure of relief. I understood perfectly from my own experiment.

I stroked her sex all over, her outer lips and also slightly inside; over her slit and her delightful little nub. She gasped at that touch, especially. I gave her special attention there. I rubbed my calloused thumb over it and pressed and pinched, then brought my other hand up to slide two fingers inside of her. Alice moaned and gasped.

"Yes, yes, Tarrant! Like that...please...more!"

I gave her more. She was finding relief, but nothing would make this go away entirely. It would last...

"Tarrant," she panted, "how long does this effect last?"

"Oh, about a day."

She gasped in dismay and looked at me through incredulous eyes. "A day?"

"Unless it is soothed over by another oil. But it has to touch every affected area to stop the sensations."

"So...you mean you have to..."

"Yes, Alice," I smirked. "I'll have to put the oil on...oh...say, my cock, and enter you to ease you completely."

"You...you are despicable!"

"Very well, then. I'll leave you be. And later I'll apply more paste to keep you entertained...all night, too." I hoped she wouldn't call my bluff. I would never do that to her. It would be too much.

"No, please!" Alice closed her eyes and swallowed. "Don't do that." She opened her eyes. "Please, Tarrant, do what you need to do, please!"

"Are you sure? Are you really sure, Alice? I don't have to take you; on the condition that you endure your punishment for two more hours. Then I'll just use my hands and a towel to remove it."

"I can't...can't take two hours! Oh, Tarrant, I can't! Just...do what you want to...to end this for me."

"Anything I want?"

Another flash of muchness. "Yes, anything you want."

"Well, you are turning out to be a surprisingly good girl now." I went and fetched the needed item from the table behind the sofa. I returned to stand between her legs. I opened the bottle and smeared some oil on my fingers.

"Breasts first?" I asked.

She nodded. "Please."

I smiled. Such politeness! I ran the oil over her breasts and within moments she was sighing in relief and gratitude.

"And now?"


"Still so shy!" I teased her. I opened my robe and coated my erection. Then I slipped the bottle into my pocket. I lowered the rope once more so she could straddle my waist. "Ready, My Alice?"

She now locked her gaze on mine. More muchness. "Yes."

I slowly entered her hot passage and my knees almost buckled. I closed my eyes and grasped her hips for balance and I heard her sigh in relief and obvious pleasure, though I knew she would never admit it. As soon as I regained my balance I began to thrust into her, still slowly. She was still a bit too tight, but I could feel that she was not bleeding. She just needed time to adjust to me now. I moved slowly, coating her insides and rubbing against her welcoming walls of warmth.

"Oh, Tarrant...more!"

Would I ever tire of those words? Never! Never would I tire of them!

I moved faster and she twitched and shuddered as I felt her pleasure rise and rise. Soon I was grasping her hips more firmly and moving hard, fast, and was so close myself that I had to fight for control. As soon as I saw her eyes begin to roll backwards and her lips part I knew it was time. I pulled out of her and came into my hand. Oh, what a glorious moment! I saw prisms of colour dance behind my eyelids as a rush of relief swept over my entire body.

But My Alice was furious. "How dare you? Why didn't you let me...let me..."

I looked at her in mock surprise. "Let you come? Because, my love, I was relieving your punishment. I wasn't here to reward you with pleasure. Do you understand? But I'll leave you lowered so that you can stand on your feet."

Alice nodded, looking both grateful and defiant. I was glad to see the defiance. That was My Alice, indeed! I do so want her to see the Truth, however, I don't want her to lose her muchness.

After I had left her there for another hour I figured she'd had enough. And I hadn't heard a word of protest from her. She had been a good girl.

I returned to My Alice and she raised her head to look at me. "Yes, my love, I'm here to relieve you from your punishment. How are your arms and legs?"

"Not too bad, but I am getting a bit stiff and tired. Why?"

"Because you've endured your punishment like a good girl. Let me give you a reward and then I'll free you."

She quirked an eyebrow at me and I smoothed her hair from her eyes. "Relax and just let me see to your pleasure." She obeyed and I knelt between her legs and, raising one over my shoulder, leaned forward to lick her folds. She gasped and I knew by now that she was pleasantly surprised. I pressed my face closer to her and began to lick her in earnest, enjoying every quiver of her body and every moan and sigh. I reached up and grasped her breasts and tugged on her nipples, hardening them at once and she shuddered again. I laved my tongue up and down her slit and then decided to take another liberty. I drew my tongue from her clit all the way to her rear passage.

Alice squealed. "Tarrant!"

I ignored her. I continued to lick her there and soon, despite herself, she began to gasp again and quiver uncontrollably. I pinched her nipples a little harder and then moved my mouth down and nipped her tiny nub delicately.

"Tarrant!" she cried out again, but this time she climaxed so beautifully that I almost cried. She was truly, really and truly, experiencing pleasure from me!

I slowly stood and released her from her bonds. I caught her in my arms and carried her into the bathroom and gently laid her in the tub. "I know you bathed this morning, my sweet, but I think a nice hot bath with scented oil will relax you considerably."

A true Alice Smile was my reward.

We had a pleasant lunch after her bath and I allowed Alice to wear one of my robes. "Tarrant, won't somebody notice we are missing from Witzend?"

I set down my tea cup. "No. I've taken care of everything. Time and I are getting along right now and He's decided to do me a Favour."

Alice stared at me in surprise. "Oh."

I looked deeply into her eyes. "I hope you aren't planning to escape, Alice. 'Tis too soon. We can't leave here yet."

"Oh, no! I wasn't thinking anything of the sort!" she protested.

"I don't know..." I said doubtfully. "After your little stunt this morning I wouldn't be surprised by anything you would do or say, my dear. And just as a warning, if you try anything, or if I even suspect you are, I will not hesitate to punish you again. Remember that."

Alice actually smiled. "I know, Tarrant, I know." Her smile was the enigmatic one she always wore when she was planning something.

I narrowed my eyes. "I know that smile, Alice. Why don't you just tell me right now what you are thinking?"

She leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms. "Very well, Tarrant. I wonder how far you'll go with all of this. I want to know just what you are and are not capable of. I can see that you aren't the Tarrant you usually are. You are in a State of Madness and it is affecting your feelings and your actions. And I know that you know this. We both also know that you cannot help it. But I want to know about this obsession you have about sex and me. What is it that is really driving you, Tarrant?"

"I told you when I brought you here."

"Are you sure that's all it is? Is there anything else?"



"Enough!" I cried out. "One more word and I'll punish you. Be. Quiet."

Alice silenced herself, but didn't look surprised. She took a sip of her tea and favoured me with a smug smile. She was wrong. There was no other reason for my bringing her here. But she was trying to anger me on purpose! She wanted to provoke...what? I decided that my tea wasn't that palatable after all and I rose and took my dishes to the sink.

"Your tea is terrible tonight, Tarrant," she suddenly said. "Besides, the company isn't much better. And if you think nobody will miss us I think you're mistaken. You should be the one to worry, not me. You will get caught and if you're very lucky, maybe Mirana will just imprison you for awhile instead of sentencing you to hard labour or Banishing you."

I swiftly rounded on her and grasped her wrists in my hands and hauled her out of the kitchen. I felt her muchness flare but I didn't care. She began to protest vehemently but I was beyond listening or comprehending. I just knew that I had to silence her. Now.

I dragged her back to The Room and pushed her face down on the sofa. I reached back over it to the table and quickly selected some cloths to stuff in her mouth and another to tie behind her head to gag her. I had to press a knee to her back to hold her, but I managed it quite nicely. Then I grabbed some rope and, after a brief struggle, tied her wrists behind her back. I then stood and hauled her to her feet.

"I told you I would punish you, Alice. I warned you. You know the Rules. You know I follow through with what I say!"

She looked angry and tried to kick me. I grabbed her leg so swiftly that I saw the shock reflect in her eyes as she fell against me awkwardly. "Fine," I growled, "a hog tie will do just fine for you, My Alice."

I pushed her onto her back and took the same rope that was trailing from her wrists and bound her breasts together firmly, looping the rope around her back to hold them. Then I flipped her onto her belly and I pulled the rope between her legs tightly enough that it pressed harshly against her tender flesh. I drew it up between her cute little arse cheeks and looped it over her bound wrists and then down her legs. I used my knees to press them tightly together and tied her ankles. Then I forced her wrists and ankles together and tied them firmly. She was completely and utterly helpless. And, I expect, completely uncomfortable.

I pulled her onto her knees and looked at her. Even I was amazed at how beautiful she was. Her gagged mouth was so sexy in itself that I felt my ever traitorous knees weaken. Her bound breasts were already turning a lovely shade of pink aside from the angry and mortified flush that covered most of her body now. She was my absolutely gorgeous, utterly helpless and beguiling Alice. As appealing as this all was, I couldn't think of what to do to with her now. I knew I couldn't leave her like this for too long. But it had to be unpleasant enough for her to remember. To remember and never say such horrid things to me ever again!

And then I thought of something. I went into the bathroom and looked through Alice's sundries. Perfect! She had hair pins. I returned to her, knelt, and held some in front of her face.

"Hair pins, Alice." She glared at me and I smirked in reply.

"They are not only useful in hair, my pretty Alice," I said. "I've just thought of a use for them right now."

She gazed at me, clearly nervous. Her eyes were frantically gazing at the pins, my eyes, and back to the pins. I could see she had no idea of what I was thinking. Well, I would end her suspense right now.

I reached for a swollen pink breast and folded a pin around her nipple and clamped it firmly. She cried out against her gag. Oh, that was a lovely, lovely sound! I clamped her other nipple and she glared at me again. But she couldn't speak or move. Perfect!

"Well, My Alice, think about what you've done and how I always do what I say I will do. If you behave you are rewarded. If you misbehave, you are punished. I may enjoy your punishments, but you likely will not. Or perhaps you will. Regardless, try to learn. I have endless ideas on how to both reward and punish you."

I went to the kitchen to fetch my tea magazine. I would read a little to try and calm down, but mostly I would look at my lovely Alice. By the White I have seldom seen such beauty.

After nearly an hour Alice began to whimper in desperation. Sighing, I rose and went to her and removed the gag.

"What is it, Alice?"

She gasped and worked her jaws slowly. I waited patiently. Finally she was able to speak.

"Tarrant, please release me! My entire body aches and my breasts are...unbearable! Please, please untie me! I'll be good!"

"I don't know, Alice. You have demonstrated that I cannot trust you. I don't believe you've learned your lesson yet." I made motions to gag her again, but her pleading continued.

"Please, Tarrant! I promise! I'll...will you release me if I pleasure you with my mouth?"

I grinned widely. Why hadn't I thought of that? "Very well, Alice. But you'll remain just as you are until I'm satisfied."

"Yes, Tarrant." I moved to her and she opened her mouth obediently. I wasted no time and grasped her head and entered her mouth none too gently. After all, she was bargaining for release, and my own "release" would come at a price. For Alice.

I couldn't resist reaching down to grasp her breasts and she cried out in pleasure against my cock but it was muffled. I began to pump into her mouth in earnest as my arousal continued to rise. At one point I felt her throat constrict as I gagged her in my zealousness. I eased up slightly and allowed her to put her recent practice to use. Once she was no longer gagging she genuinely seemed to enjoy pleasuring me in this way. I'll admit I felt relief. I had hoped she would enjoy this. It brought me so much pleasure and if it pleased My Alice, then all the better. I would eagerly pleasure her similarly any time she asked. Even here and now, during her confinement. If she had asked at any time, I would have eagerly complied. It was a good thing that she didn't realise.

After several minutes of her delicious pleasuring of me she laved her tongue over my most sensitive spot and I came. It was as divine as ever! I held her mouth pressed against my pelvis as I spurted my juices down her throat and she swallowed every drop.

As I was coming down from my intense orgasm I knelt and carefully removed the hairpins from her nipples. As the blood came rushing back she cried out in pain and I gently massaged one nipple with my fingers and tenderly sucked on the other. Gradually her pain lessened and Alice began to sigh in relief. When she was better I kissed her lips and to my pleasant surprise she returned my kiss with enthusiasm, even plunging her tongue into my mouth. I held her head once more and we explored each others mouths with more passion than I ever dared to hope for from her.

At long last we broke the kiss and gazed into each others eyes for several long moments. "I love you, Alice," I said softly.

I began to untie her carefully and almost dropped the rope when she whispered, "I love you, too, Tarrant."

Could it be? Did she love me? Did she truly? Or, was she...could she be...just saying the words she knew I needed to hear from her? Perhaps...perhaps she just wanted me to let her go.

I said nothing as I now fumbled with untying her. When I was finished I couldn't bring myself to stay and massage her sore limbs. I went to the bedroom and closed the door. I couldn't do this any longer. In one day she had defeated me, completely and utterly. If she stayed...

But she wouldn't. She'd go. And I'd let her. Something had just broken inside of me. I didn't have the right to keep her. After all I had done...I didn't deserve her or even the tiniest shred of her love. My Madness must have left me at her words. Whether she meant them or not didn't matter. I was Myself again. And I didn't like who I had just been. At all. Forcing her to submit to me in such ways... I curled up in bed and hoped I could fall asleep. Forever.

Alice -

Alice unpacked her clothing and toiletries and took them to the Bathroom. She needed yet another warm bath to relax her and help her collect her thoughts. Right now she felt confused. Angry, used, abused, violated; but also adored and precious by the one man she loved. But did she love him now? After what he did? After taking her virtue and tormenting her? After forcing her to respond to him in ways she had never dreamed possible?

Now, however, she slowly began to feel numb in both mind and body. She lay back and closed her eyes. She needed to sort out what had happened to her and how she felt about it. Most importantly, she needed to know how she felt about Tarrant.

About an hour later she rose from her bath, drained it, and dressed. She looked blankly at her face as she combed out her tangled wet hair. She didn't look bad, really. She actually had a healthy flush to her cheeks and except for her blank stare she looked quite well. Alice was suddenly annoyed by this and thrust her comb down and stalked from the bathroom.

Good. Tarrant was in the bedroom and the door was closed. She went to the kitchen and made herself some tea and selected some fruit to eat. She may need some time, she knew, but she would sort out her feelings. The mixture she was suddenly feeling unnerved her. She felt bleak and empty, yet there was that dark spark of anger and resentment. But there was also...understanding. But for now she resolutely shut out those thoughts and feelings and just ate her meal. She tasted nothing. She felt nothing. And then she retired for the night on the sofa.

Alice could see that when Tarrant emerged from the bedroom and saw her curled on the sofa that he was completely shocked. He had expected her to be gone.

"A...Alice? You...you're still here?"

"Yes, Tarrant," she sighed, "I am. And I'll stay for awhile. I need to think. However, I'll thank you to stay away from me until I sort out all of this in my mind. All right?"

Tarrant nodded, his eyes blue with sadness, yet tinged with the violet of slight hope.

They lived together yet separate for almost a week. They were civil to each other and spoke just a little. Neither strayed toward the Big Subject. Alice needed time to think and Tarrant respected that.

Tarrant couldn't help his eye colour. He was well aware that they often glowed deep green around her; a colour she had once adored; but did she now? Would she ever again? He always turned away when he feared his eyes revealed too much.

Alice noticed, however. She wasn't swayed by his eyes, but they merely confirmed her growing suspicions of herself. She was attracted to him. She felt alive with him. She felt more alive than she ever had, even more so than when she had slayed the Jabberwocky. She hated him, too. His Darkness when he was in That Madness was intimidating, but at the same time it was...attractive. It was fascinating and exciting. It also, to her chagrin, awoke feelings and desires in her that she couldn't explain.

Even now, when he wasn't in That Madness, he made her feel alive. He was ridiculously easy to read. He loved her. He was Himself and he truly loved her. He hadn't been lying or merely caught up in That Madness when he professed those things to her. Something inside her also knew that he had loved her almost since the very beginning of their relationship, but she had been blind; perhaps willfully so. Had she really been so cowardly? To fear the feelings she had been developing ever since they had met since her Second Return?

The Madness made her face the cold fact that he was, and perhaps forever would, feel guilt as being the only Hightopp to survive that horrible Horvundush Day. So Alice understood the reason for his madness. He needed it to survive and cope with the guilt and unending torment. However, also knew Tarrant Hightopp the man. Beneath what she called his Normal Madness, she saw the Man. A loving and clever man. A man who would risk his life for one he loved...and he had risked himself for her many times! And he had believed in her when no-one else did.

He had never doubted her. And he had always loved her. Always.

Alice sipped her tea as she pondered. He had always loved and believed in her. And this most recent time when he had been his most Mad, he had done unforgivable things to her, but he hadn't injured her. Many may say that taking a woman's virginity by force was injury, and they would be correct, but she knew that when it came to real physical harm that Tarrant was incapable of hurting her. He would never hurt her; of that she was certain.

But to be certain of other things, she would need to leave him.

Telling Tarrant was one of the most painful things she had ever had to do. He had at once turned into a sobbing child who was convinced she was leaving him forever. He sat huddled in a corner of the kitchen and Alice knelt and embraced him, kissing his forehead and trying to comfort him and assure him that her leaving him was only temporary. She tried to explain that she needed to be around people again and explore her heart and mind. She could no longer do so in solitude; she needed answers in a different place. That place had to be Somewhere Else, where she could live life and see how she coped and how she felt.

And so, with finally getting him to swear that he would not hurt himself and that he would either go home or go to Witzend, she left.

Alice found some solace in the buzzing and activity of Witzend. She observed how the Crafters and the Shopkeepers bargained. She learned the convoluted ways of trading and negotiation and how agreements were constantly being changed.

She also had dinners and danced and got to know people. She shopped and found that Queen Mirana had her on an account and any charges were to be sent to Marmoreal.

Alice had fun. She felt alive. Mostly. Some days she felt fine and felt like Herself. But on other days she felt small and alone and...unsatisfied. On those days everything was black and grey and not the usual Brightness of Underland. Something was missing; something she needed. She would shrug and tell herself that it was being in a strange place and learning strange customs that was troubling her mind.

Alice also had dreams. Strange, erotic and pleasant yet painful dreams. These dreams made her yearn for something that she could not attain. She would search in vain for something that would end her inner sensual misery. But it, or He, always eluded her; would invisibly tease and torment her but never bring her the fulfillment she needed. Always, upon awakening, she felt unfilled and embarrassingly sexually wanting and craving and very, very empty. She felt...like less of a woman. Less of a person.

Finally, several weeks later Alice sat down before bedtime and penned a letter that she would send to Marmoreal the following morning. In it she told Tarrant what had become True for her. Good or evil, Dark or Light, Half-Mad or Mad, she needed him. She loved him and needed him. She was incomplete without him and she would not feel whole again until she was back with him. Nothing was right. Nothing was right or bright or could fulfill her unless she was his. Even when there were thoughts of hatred and resentment, she needed him and could not live without him. Trying was futile. She belonged to him.

Alice, for the first time since she had set foot in Witzend, had a peaceful night's sleep. Her reply from Tarrant was swift and delivered by a green pigeon-like bird the next day. It said simply, "My Alice, my love, come Home. Your Tarrant awaits."

I know some of you may think that this is unrealistic and that Alice should have left Tarrant. But, being the "happily ever after" person I am for Alice and Tarrant I had to make it this way. Plus, I think we all have Dark and Light in us, so I thought, what the heck?

Anyway, all comments are welcome!