Hey! This is for the gorgeous La Vita a Colori aka the Izaya kun to my Shizu chan, who despite being a mansmex GOD of an author, requested a sweet, first kiss drabblefic (and drabble Sasuke does) where Sasuke is getting anxious over kissing Naruto. T'is also and early "Happy Birthday!" present to her too!
Happy Birthday my lovely! I love you! This is quite possibly different to what you expected but I hope you still like it. ;P
Naruto had to be asleep because with that boy and his mouth awake, Sasuke and his angsting would never happen. Don't throw things at me for Sasuke's sapping.
My Secret Heart
Is it ok to think something strange right in front of the person it involves? While they're asleep?
Uchiha Sasuke didn't know, which was making it very hard to concentrate on anything else, like keeping the tea tray in his hands steady. You were allowed to think strange things about other people when you were alone in bed or in the bath or just at home by yourself, where no one could see your face or ask you what was on your mind. But right in front of someone... thinking this kind of thing...
Sasuke stood uncertainly in the open doorway that led onto his veranda, piping hot tea and two tea cakes on a tray in his hands. His eyes were on the boy who lay peacefully on the warm boards of the veranda having fallen asleep in the sun while Sasuke was away. And that's when Sasuke had gotten to his thinking.
At first when Sasuke had come to the doorway, his first instinct was to kick Naruto awake, he had gone to all the effort to bringing out tea and cakes after the blonde had complained about "catering for guests" and "being a good host" after all. But then Sasuke remembered the tea which gave him a moment more to look the smaller blonde boy over.
Naruto's hair was feathery looking and messily pushed off of his forehead, his eyelashes were watery blonde in the soft sunlight that flooded the Uchiha house's garden. The boy's mouth was closed. Sasuke could hear him breathe out and then in through his nose, his chest rising and falling in even rhythm. He lay on his back with his legs stretched out making the smaller boy look longer than he was, one arm asleep where it had fallen when Naruto flopped down and the other behind his head acting as a pillow. The orange jacket that Naruto had such an idiotic fondness for was tossed near the door and Sasuke's feet so that the sleeping boy was left in his orange pants that were rolled up to the knee and his black t-shirt that was hitched up revealing the strip of Naruto's sunny skin between his belly button and the visible waist band of his green boxers.
Naruto was an idiot but he was sort of... cute. He looked soft to touch. Sasuke breathed in.
Was it alright to think, right as he stood before the sleeping Naruto, that maybe... Sasuke wanted to... kiss him? He'd thought about it before, more than once, more times than he liked to admit. But it was a strange thought.
It'd been a whole month since the day when Naruto told Sasuke he liked him. Sasuke took a moment to remember the annoying way the blonde had stood with his hands by his sides and a trying-to-be-casual look on his face even though he was red around the ears and had to raise his chin to look Sasuke in the eye.
"I like you Teme," he had said...
But since then, nothing much had changed.
He and Naruto weren't exactly spoony lovers but Sasuke hadn't expected love-love giggling or holding hands or lots of touching, in fact the idea of being that pathetic, especially in public just made Sasuke think of fangirls. Sasuke didn't really know what he had expected from the "relationship" but he liked not having to put up the rivals front in front of everyone else and falling into the "best friends" pace with Naruto. He liked just... being, without having to explain anything or fight with his team mate just because they were supposed to.
He also liked it that Naruto sometimes came over after training- like today, and he liked that sometimes Naruto had a bath too and then when he sat next to Sasuke, Naruto smelt clean and sunny and looked small and fresh at Sasuke's side. But what Sasuke didn't like was when Naruto came home with him and fell asleep on the veranda because it made Sasuke think about kissing the stupid blonde and he wasn't sure he should be thinking about something like that. He wasn't sure because it was Naruto and because they were both guys that was supposed to be weird or wrong, and because it was kissing and Sasuke never intentionally done it with someone who wasn't his mother, and because when even after a month...
Nothing much had changed.
Who could tell what Naruto was thinking most of the time in relation to anything that wasn't to do with food or training or missions? Who could tell what Naruto thought about kissing with someone? About kissing with Sasuke... Even though Naruto was the one who said "like" first... Sasuke wondered what "liking" someone meant to the blonde. It wasn't like the young Uchiha's idea of "like" meant kissing, it was just that when he saw Naruto today... And the kiss at the academy hadn't really counted so...
Setting down the tea tray well away from Naruto's unpredictable sleeping body, Sasuke came to the edge of the veranda and sat down and looked out at the untended but somehow averagely neat garden. The water in the pond to his right pliped as a fish flicked its tail above the surface.
Sasuke wanted to kiss Naruto but he wasn't sure how he should go about it. Usually after he thought about it the young ninja would try to dismiss it and not dwell on the fantasy even as it continued to come back to him in the form of dreams; it was stupid for someone like Sasuke to be thinking of such tender things. It made him feel weird. Or rather, he thought it should make someone like him feel weird.
But now that he wanted to remember them, to see how the scenario had run, he couldn't remember at all. Not helping.
Sasuke growled lowly under his breath and picked up a teacake, proceeding to take messy bite out of frustration and chew slowly.
It would definitely be an awkward thing to do when Naruto didn't seem like he was concerned about anything of that sort. Sasuke didn't know whether to put that down to lack of interest or the fact that maybe Sasuke should be the one taking the lead.
Hard to tell.
Sasuke put the tea cake back down after just one bite and then picked up his tea, letting the heat prickle the sensitive skin of his palms. And then he put it down again without drinking any and stood up quietly, twisting the delicate features of his handsome face into somewhere between a grimace and an anxious frown. Naruto slept on.
First kiss was the term given to what was about to happen. He, Uchiha Sasuke was about do it. He was going to kiss Naruto. Not that the blonde would know because he was asleep. Well, it was his fault for not doing anything too. His loss, he'd miss it.
Sasuke got carefully down on his hands and knees and leaned over Naruto, almost nose to nose. The boy beneath him kept sleeping. Sasuke stayed there a long moment, tracing Naruto's face with his dark eyes, following the curve of his round, boyish face and along his funny whiskers, up to his nose, across his eyelashes and eyebrows, coming to rest on Naruto's petal pink mouth. Sasuke's heart hammered nervously in his chest. He blinked and then drew a long breath through his nose in time with Naruto's, taking in the other boy's milky scent. Something sweet but not sickly; honeysuckle and clean running water. Pure and soothing.
Sasuke furrowed his brow and blew an irritated sigh onto Naruto's cheek before moving back to sit over Naruto's hips, on his knees so that he didn't touch and wake the sleeping ninja. Scowling, Sasuke clenched and unclenched his fists.
He couldn't do it. Not when he was thinking this kind of thing all by himself and not when Naruto was asleep. He couldn't kiss him.
Why was that?
If Uchiha Sasuke wanted something he should just go after it the way he did with everything else. He should snatch it away before anyone else could have a chance. He should just lean down and kiss Uzumaki Naruto right now!
But he couldn't.
Because first kisses were meant to be shared and to be perfect. You were supposed to Eskimo noses and stare deeply into each other's eyes. It was supposed to be special... And despite the disturbing feeling that all this was way too sappy to think about it, Naruto sleeping and Sasuke kissing him just wasn't right at all.
Sasuke chewed his bottom lip and frowned down at Naruto's sleeping face.
Idiot. Why did you have to make me realize something I could have been just fine without? I didn't even know I liked you until you said something, and now you don't give me any signs about anything.
Suddenly Naruto's eyelashes began to flutter and Sasuke felt his heartbeat pick up in panic as the boy began to slip back into consciousness. Sasuke was too taken by surprise to have time to move off of the blonde before Naruto's eyes opened and he looked straight up into Sasuke's scowling to hide his embarrassment expression.
There was absolutely no way Sasuke could make an excuse for this situation without it sounding exactly like it was.
Naruto continued to lie under him, blinking a few times to wake himself.
"Sasuke?" Naruto called again, using Sasuke's proper name which made the young Uchiha's heart jump. Naruto was looking at him strangely, like concern almost. That was probably because Sasuke kept flicking his eyes away and then bringing them back, the corners of his mouth turned down in a dark grimace.
"Did you want something, Sasuke?" asked Naruto slowly, seemingly sensing that this was not the time to pry or be reckless. Sasuke wished he would so that the moment would pass but of course, Naruto was never obedient.
Sasuke opened his mouth slowly, steeling himself before he looked Naruto in the eye and said as calmly as he could.
Naruto's blue eyes widened and his mouth dropped open. Sasuke immediately regretted it and then instantly became horrified with what had passed his lips as Naruto started to laugh.
Sasuke, mortified, began to get to his feet but as he did, Naruto leapt on him and yelled, "Sorry, sorry! Come here!" Sasuke struggled but finally Naruto had Sasuke back on top of him with his legs hooked behind Sasuke's knees to keep him in place, his fingers gripping Sasuke's wrists tightly. He was grinning. Sasuke drew a furious breath through his nose.
"Let me go, Dobe. Just forget what I said." Naruto said nothing but in one swift movement, whipped his hands from Sasuke's wrists and grabbed the other boy around the neck pulling Sasuke down with his weight and smashed his lips against Sasuke's in a messy, clumsy kiss.
It was over before Sasuke even had time to process what was going on. He wasn't even sure he had responded to Naruto's snuggly kiss; their faces and smells so close and Naruto's lips pressed firmly against his for a second before the blonde let go and dropped back onto the veranda with a loud "mwah!~" to finish of the kiss, his body landing with a heavy thump on the wood. Like the kiss of a child.
Sasuke wiped his mouth with a quiet look of frustration on his face as he hovered over Naruto on his hands and knees. Naruto moved his legs off of Sasuke's to free the other boy and starfished his arms and legs.
"What was that?" Sasuke asked sourly, mildly disgusted at how unperfect and undignified their first kiss had been.
So much for slow and intense...
Although the feeling of Naruto being so close had been quite nice. Sasuke supposed that the rush he had from having Naruto touching him, Naruto's mouth finally touching his, was more important than how they had touched in this case.
"A kiss," replied Naruto happily. The boy beneath Sasuke was smiling, his face a healthy pink.
"Sure," said Sasuke sitting up and poking the blonde in the forehead. "You kinda suck..."
"You kinda suck!" retorted Naruto, a blush shooting into his cheeks. Sasuke couldn't help but smile.
Naruto's angry over something dumb was so cute. The blonde was so spontaneous and random that it was irritating, but really, it was something Sasuke probably needed. This boy.
"And I thought I'd have to find a way to let you have your way with me. But you did a lot by yourself," said Naruto with a quirked smile, his blue eyes standing out against the lingering red in his face.
Stupid, thought Sasuke.
Naruto stuck his tongue out at Sasuke; a playful insult, knowing that Sasuke was thinking how brainless he was, but Sasuke continued to smile even as Naruto withdrew his tongue and touched the long dark bangs that hung either side of Sasuke's face with his fingertips, wearing a gentler smile now.
"You're a total idiot."
"I know. But you like it."
Mwahahaa! Sasuke got seme-ed into making Naruto his uke :]