This oneshot has been finished for a while (like, before there was an option to post CA fics on ), but I just haven't posted it yet because I didn't want to spam this place with all my fanfics. I love reading other people's stuff (have I mentioned yet how many genius ideas I've seen out here? I'm sooo impressed because I've seen tons of ideas that I never would have thought up myself) and I love how quickly it's filling up in here! And there's only been two episodes of the TV show! That's just amazing, in my opinion.

This was pretty much entirely inspired by the Pilot episode that just had to take an Annie/Auggie twist. 'Cuz that's how I roll. ;)


I know who you think you are
Sorry I turned you on but I'm kissin' you off

- "It's Not You," by Halestorm

"Well, well, of all the bars in all the world, you had to walk into mine, Annie Walker…"

Son of a…

Annie turned around slowly, trying not to wince. Ethan. Lovely. Why would this guy be in her bar? It was a CIA bar! Granted, he probably didn't know it was a CIA bar, but that still didn't explain why he was here, of all places, on a Friday night. Was he stalking her?

Actually, that wouldn't be that awful. At least then she would have license to shoot him.

"Ethan," she said, shifting from foot to foot at her spot by the bar's counter. "Wow. It's so nice to see you. Again."

If he noticed her total lack of enthusiasm, he sure as hell didn't show it. Which was unfortunate, because the sooner he took a hint the sooner she could knock back a couple of beers with her friends and forget about her shitty workweek.

"I'm so happy I ran into you," he said, practically gushing. Oh, Jesus, was he going to propose next? "I was wondering if you wanted to play racquetball with me? Remember, like I was saying a couple of weeks ago? I know you said you didn't play, but I really think you'll get the hang of it-"

Did he ever take a breath?

Annie felt a tap on her shoulder, and inhaled the familiar clean yet musky scent of her closest- really, probably only- friend at the CIA. "Annie, Conrad said he got us a table in the back of the bar," Auggie said, and she had to repress a shiver as the low baritone of his voice hit her ears.

Wait- this could work…

Stepping aside, Annie twisted her torso around and snaked her arm through the crook of Auggie's, leaning just enough weight against him to drive the point home. "That's great, sweetie," she cooed, pressing a quick, chaste kiss to his cheek- except he turned his head towards her at the last second- no doubt to wonder why the hell she was suddenly referring to him as 'sweetie'- so she wound up kissing the side of his mouth by accident.


Glancing back at Ethan, she faked an oblivious smile and said, "Oh, I'm sorry, Ethan, this is Auggie Anderson."

Ethan's face was frozen for several beats, but Annie wasn't concerned with him. She was too busy praying to any and all the gods out there that Auggie would just go with her little ruse and not question any of it in front of Mr. Dud.

But, clearly he liked her way more than she ultimately deserved, because he kept his mouth shut as Ethan continued to look aghast.

Okay, she owed Auggie a really, really big bottle of Patron for this.

"Oh," Ethan said, sounding significantly less peppier than he had moments before. "Oh, I- I didn't realize. That's nice. Good for you- that's noble."

About damn time. He practically sprinted away. Damn, she should've thought of it earlier.

Annie let out a relieved breath, slumping against Auggie's arm. "I'm so sorry I had to do that to you," she said, reaching over and picking up her pint of beer from the counter. "But it was absolutely necessary. He's so boring and I couldn't put up with him talking my ear off again."

Luckily, he seemed more amused than anything, quirking an eyebrow. "Do you trash talk me this much when I'm not in earshot?" he asked, smirking.

She laughed, elbowing him gently in the ribs. "No," she said firmly. "I like you. You are not another one of my sister's blind date duds."

"Ah. Never have I been so relieved that I just qualify as 'blind' and nothing else."

"No, you are most certainly not a dud," she said with a flirty wink, even though she knew he couldn't actually see her. "Actually, you'd probably be great if you were one of Danielle's awful set-ups. I might actually have fun at a Thursday night dinner party for the first time. We should figure out a way to introduce you to her…"

Auggie picked up his beer, cocking his head to the side. "So we can start dating for real?" he asked, and she couldn't tell if he sounded more incredulous or confused.

"We could just pretend to date," she said, taking another swig of beer. She knew it sounded ridiculous even to her own ears, but it was fun and more entertaining than spending 5 more seconds talking to Ethan. "That way, I'd have a fun time at one of my sister's shindigs, while simultaneously getting Danielle off my back about needing a stable romantic relationship in my life."

He nodded, dropping the smile and looking as serious as someone at a funeral. "Of course," he replied, taking a sip of his own beer. "That makes perfect sense. Oh, wait, you forgot something- what am I getting out of this hypothetical deal?"

"The pleasure of my company, of course," she replied, just as seriously. That only lasted about half a minute before she broke out into a grin and started laughing. "No, I promise that I would never put you through that. I like you too much to introduce you to my sister this early on in our friendship."

Tugging his arm, she added, "C'mon, I see Conrad. Let's go grab that table."

"Wait," Auggie said slowly, holding back. She recognized that cocky grin, and she paused, almost afraid of what he had to say next. "One last question- does this mean I get a goodnight kiss?"

Annie let out a burble of uncontrollable laughter at that, and smoothly leaned back enough that she could wind up and slug his arm with her free hand. "Ha ha," she said drily, as he made a noise of discontent and rubbed the offended arm. "Don't push your luck."

He laughed but followed her as she led him towards the table Conrad had grabbed. "I thought you had figured it out by now, Walker," he said, right before they reached earshot of Conrad. "I don't need luck." Before she could react, he leaned forward, pressing a kiss to her mouth and sending an almost electric shock shooting down her spine.

Auggie stepped forward, reaching and finding a chair at the table and sitting down, leaving Annie behind, still blinking dumbly.

Well. Damn. Maybe Auggie would make a good date.


Very proud of this one, I have to admit. I love how I've only seen one episode of this TV show (and it's only been two days since it came on) and I've already written a ton of oneshots, each one longer than the last. By the end of the week I'll probably have something that's like 12 pages long.

Anyway, tell me what you think! :D