Beautiful. That's how this all started: the love, the heartbreaks. That one word. Who knew it could have such an lasting impression? I certainly didn't.
Raven was sitting on her bed in her room reading a dark book. Well, looking at a dark book, rather, she had already read it half a dozen times. She sighed and put the book beside her. She had honestly just ran out of things to read.
Almost as if he was waiting for this exact situation to happen, Beast Boy came bounding into Raven's room.
"Hey, Rae!" Beast Boy greeted happily.
"What?" Raven said back, dryly.
Beast Boy's smile faded slightly.
"You know, I don't always come to annoy you," He said.
"Could've fooled me," Raven replied as she picked her book back up and pretended to read it. Beast Boy eyed her carefully. Suddenly his face lit back up, as if he just solved the world's biggest problems.
"Actually," Beast Boy chimed, "I have something that might interest you." He gave Raven a sly smile. She just rolled her eyes.
"I highly doubt that." Raven said.
"No, really!" Beast Boy said as he grabbed Raven's hand and pulled her out of her room.
"You know, I should really hex you one of these times," Raven said as her and Beast Boy walked down the hallway. Beast Boy just smiled proudly and continued down the hall until he came to a door.
"You're room?" Raven questioned sarcastically, raising an eyebrow.
"It's what's in the room that's important," Beast Boy replied. Raven rolled her eyes again and followed him into his room.
"Just take a seat," Beast Boy motioned to the bed that he just cleared clothes and comic books off of, "I need to find it."
"Find what?" Raven asked as she sat on the bed reluctantly.
"You'll see," came Beast Boy's voice from out of his closet. Raven rested her head on her hands and waited, looking completely bored.
After rummaging for about a minute, Beast Boy bounced out of the closet, shoving a green, thick book in front of Raven's face.
"What's this?" Raven asked, with the slightest hint of intrust.
The book had a dark green, hard cover with pictures of dinosaurs, birds and a variety of different animals on it. The title read, "You Can Change, You Just Don't Know How."
"That's the book that taught me how to morph into different animals when I was little," Beast Boy explained.
Raven's eyes widened as she studied the cover and flipped through the pages.
"And why do you think I would want this?" She asked.
"I dunno," Beast Boy answered, "I just thought you might find it interesting."
"Well, I am running out of things to read," Raven said.
"Is that even possible?" Beast Boy chuckled. Raven ignored the joke.
"Yeah, I suppose I could borrow it for a while," Raven decided. Beast Boy then got the biggest smile of life on his face.
"Does that mean you like it?" He asked, gleaming. Raven looked into his anticipating face.
"Why are you always trying to impress me, Beast Boy?" Raven asked coolly. Beast Boy's smile quickly disintegrated.
"What do you mean?"
"Well," Raven took a deep breath, "For starters, this book. I got the impression that you didn't just come into my room to tell me about a book. Secondly, you are always trying to start conversations with me when I'm obviously not in the mood. I don't know if you can't tell the difference between people being busy, or if you can and you just don't care."
Beast Boy's face was turning into a sad, depressed frown. Raven seemed to notice it, but she kept on.
"And lastly," she continued, "You are always, always trying to make me laugh at your jokes."
Beast Boy didn't say anything, so Raven got up to leave.
"I suppose," Beast Boy looked down at his shoes. He was starting to blush. "It's because I figured that if I got the most beautiful girl I know to laugh, I would have actually accomplished something."
Raven was stunned and speechless. Beast Boy couldn't of just called her beautiful. No one had ever called her that before, and she had least expected it from him. No, he must of been talking about someone else. Obviously.
"What does Starfire have to do with any of this?" Raven asked, collecting herself.
"I'm not talking about Starfire, Rae," Beast Boy pointed his puppy eyes at Raven. Now she was the one that was blushing. She quickly put her hood up to conceal her embarrassment. She rushed to the door.
"Well, thanks ... I guess," Raven said before she disappeared into the hallway.
Well, you could say the next few days were a bit awkward, for me anyways. He continued to act like absolutely nothing happened. I considered that that moment in his room was all just a dream, but every time we locked eyes, and my heart would skip a beat, my mind told me it really happened. Or maybe it was my heart.
The Teen Titans were all sitting around a big table outside the tower. It was on a clearing that overlooked the lake. They were eating supper that consisted of pizza, ceaser salad and Pepsi. The wind had considerably died down from what it had been earlier on, and was now just a cool breeze that made the temperature just perfect for enjoying an outdoor meal. The sun was just starting to set and it made the lake look ravishing.
As fate would have it, Beast Boy just had to plop himself down by Raven.
"Dude, I am so starving!" He said as he reached passed Raven's plate to grab his portion of the all-cheese pizza.
"You could say excuse me," Raven said flatly. She reached in front of herself to get some salad.
On the other side of her was Cyborg, who was just as hungry as Beast Boy.
"I think I could eat a whole zebra!" Cyborg exclaimed, as he reached over Raven's outstretched arm to grab the Pepsi. Raven glared at him.
"Would you like some?" Offered Cyborg nervously. Raven put her hand on her forehead and gave Cyborg her glass to fill.
The rest of the evening went smoothly, until Cyborg decided he needed more pepper, which was on the other side of Beast Boy. Instead of just asking for it to be passed, Cyborg semi-stood up and leaned over to grab it. On the way, he bumped into Raven, who was just about to take a bite of her salad, and knocked the fork out of her hand. The rest seemed to happen in slow motion.
Raven leaned down to pick up her fork, not realizing that Beast Boy was doing the same.
"Ow!" they both cried out as their heads bumped into each other. Startled by the other ones cry, they both looked at each other. Raven's purple eyes gazed into Beast Boy's green ones, and she felt like the moment was lasting forever.
Beast Boy cleared his throat, "Sorry," he said sincerely. He picked up the fork, handed it to Raven and continued to eat, not once glancing back up to look at her. Raven held the fork in her hand and stared at it. 'Did we just have another moment?' She asked herself.
"Raven, are you going to finish that last piece of cheese and sauce baked onto grease-covered dough?" Starfire asked from across the table.
"Oh," Raven said, startled, "No. No, you can have it."
And so little things like that kept happening between us. I never thought it was going to evolve into anything more. Then that night happened, and if I would've known what was to come the next morning, I might have said different things.
Cyborg was in the garage adding the newest GPS system to his car, Robin and Starfire were doing their laundry, which left Raven and Beast Boy alone in the commons area. Beast Boy was sitting in the middle of the long couch, slouching down and looking at the empty TV screen. Raven was sitting and the far left side of the couch reading the "You Can Change, You Just Don't Know How" book.
"I'm so bored!" Beast Boy exclaimed out loud. Raven flipped the page of the book, ignoring his whine.
Beast Boy scanned the room, desperately looking for something to do. Something on the coffee table caught his eye.
Raven was so into the book, she didn't notice Beast Boy slide up beside her.
"Hey, Raven?" he said to her, a mischievous look on his face.
"What?" Raven said back.
"You wanna...Do Something with me?"
Raven's eyes snapped up from her book and she looked at Beast Boy. He was raising his eyebrows up and down and was giving her a sly smile. Raven gave him her best weirded-out smile and said, "Uh, yeah, no, I'd, I'd rather not."
"Fine then," Beast Boy said glumly as he slid back to the middle of the couch and grabbed the thing off the coffee table, and continued talking, each word getting louder and more excited sounding "I guess you don't want to play the most AMAZING VIDEO GAME EVER!"
'Video game?' Raven thought to herself 'Of course he meant a video game, what were you thinking? ... Wait, what WAS I thinking? Why would I be thinking he wanted to do THAT with ME? And Why'd I get so nervous about it?'
Raven cleared her throat, "Um, Which video game did you have in mind?"
Beast Boy shoved the game box into Raven's face.
"Only the best video game in the world!" Beast Boy declared, "Motorcross V8!"
Raven took the box out of Beast Boy's hand to examine it.
"Motorcross V8, huh?"
Within minutes Beast Boy had the game set up and they were choosing which motorbike they wanted to ride. Raven chose a bike labeled "The Violet", it was a deep purple. Beast Boy chose "The Animal" which was lime green. Beast Boy quickly explained the controls to Raven and then they were off racing each other through hilly terrain.
Raven lost the first 5 races.
"Sorry, Rae," Beast Boy said, "But you just can't beat the master!"
"Try again," Raven said back.
And the race was back on. Raven glued her eyes to the screen and, to her astonishment, started to win. Another lap and she would finally win! She was completely focused on finishing the last stretch of the race when she felt a warm breath by her ear.
"You know, you're kinda cute when you concentrate," came Beast Boy's whisper.
The Violet instantly crashed into the side of a hill and The Animal went zooming by.
"Won again!" Beast Boy shouted out with glee. Raven was staring at him with wide eyes. 'He thinks I look...cute?' she thought.
"Hey, no fair!" She finally protested.
"What?" Beast Boy looked at her innocently. "It's not my fault you can't keep your mind on the race."
Raven glared at him and then rolled her eyes, "One more round."
The evening went on, Raven winning some rounds and Beast Boy winning others. They were both so fixated on the game that they didn't notice Robin and Starfire come in to grab some food or Cyborg announcing that he was going to bed and turned off the lights in the room.
After the millionth round, Raven looked at the clock hanging on the wall. It was already 10 o'clock, and they had started playing at 6. The moon was high in the sky and it was casting a blue-glow on the room.
Raven set her controller down and clicked off the TV
"It's getting late," she said in her regular monotone voice despite the fact that her and Beast Boy were just laughing a couple seconds ago.
"So?" Beast Boy said back to her.
"I should go to bed," Raven answered.
"Awwe," Beast Boy complained, "Can't we stay up 5 minutes more?"
"Actually, I'm kinda getting sick of playing video games, Beast Boy" Raven said and she started to get up. Beast Boy grabbed hold of her hand.
"Can't we just talk for a while?"
Raven looked down at Beast Boy, and he was giving her those damned puppy eyes again that forced her to sit back down.
"Talk about what?" Raven asked. Beast Boy released her hand and stretched himself out on his back on the one end of the couch so his head was relatively in the middle.
"I dunno," Beast Boy responded, "Stuff."
Raven laid down on the couch identical to how he was laying, so that their heads were almost touching.
"What kind of stuff?"
Beast Boy was silent for several minutes. Raven was just debating on whether or not she should leave when he finally started to talk.
"Raven, do you believe in soulmates?" he asked. Raven stared up at the ceiling and thought about her answer.
"I don't know exactly. I guess there is someone out there for everyone, I never really thought about it."
"Well, I've been thinking about it."
Raven propped herself up and looked over at him.
"What exactly have you been thinking?" She inquired. Beast Boy shifted a bit.
"Well, just things like do I have one and what if she's already in my life?"
Raven laid herself back down, "Do you think she already is?"
"I've had that thought before, yeah." Beast Boy answered back. Raven swallowed.
"Did you have anyone in mind?" she asked quickly. Beast Boy didn't answer right away.
"Just a real good friend of mine," was his response.
"Oh," Raven said.
It was quiet for a long time.
"So," Beast Boy said, breaking the silence, "What did you think of the video games?"
They both talked about video games for a bit and then just talked about random things until Raven finally fell asleep.
After that night I thought I had maybe half a chance, but no SHE had to come along and ruin everything. Any possibility of him liking me went down the drain when she arrived and captured his heart with her blonde hair and blue eyes. One look in those eyes and he was caught in her trap, but I could see through her. She wanted nothing more than a "good time" while she was staying with us.
Raven awoke to the annoying sound of the Teen Titan "intruder approaching" siren. Raven opened her eyes and was surprised to find herself still on the couch. She sat up and looked around. Beast Boy was no longer there and there was a bunch of commotion. Suddenly the doors of the common room flew open and Robin was there ordering Raven to come outside.
The Titans all flew out to watch the new girl beat a giant scorpion. She introduced herself as "Terra". Everyone seemed to be impressed with her, especially Beast Boy, but Raven wasn't exactly okay with Terra staying with them.
So Terra came and stayed with us, and the first thing she did was completely cover the bathroom with mud. The next day she dazzled everyone by hurling some rocks at the machines on the training course, but she still didn't impress me. So then we take her out to fight against Slade and his minions, and she almost KILLS Beast Boy. When she left the tower that night I was, you could say, happy. But then she decided to return back, and this time it was to stay.
Raven was sitting on her bed staring out at the sunset from her big picture window. Terra had been staying with the Titans for a couple of weeks and her and Beast Boy were unofficially dating.
There was a knock on Raven's door.
"Come in," Raven said dryly. She heard the door open but didn't bother to turn around to see who it was.
Beast Boy's voice made Raven twist her head to see him. He hadn't been in her room in at least a month.
"What do you want Beast Boy?" Raven asked as she faced the window again. She hadn't exactly been the friendliest with him since Terra came. Even though nothing had really gone on between her and Beast Boy, she still felt a tinge of betrayal from him, and every time she saw him, it reminded her of how much her heart hurt.
"I dunno, I guess I just came to talk. I barely ever see you anymore," Beast Boy answered.
"That's because you're with Terra all the time," Raven muttered under her breath.
Beast Boy came and sat down beside Raven on her bed.
"Awesome sunset tonight, isn't'?" Beast Boy tried to make small talk. The atmosphere was awkward for the both of them.
Raven had been meaning to talk to Beast Boy. She felt she had to tell him about her feelings towards him and how much it was hurting her. She would've done anything to be able to tell him everything, but she could never find the right words to say. That night she decided to try anyway.
"Beast Boy..." Raven started.
Raven could not think of a good way to word her thoughts so she just spit out the first thing that came to her head.
"Are you sure that Terra is ... right for you?"
Beast Boy looked at her confused.
"What do you mean, Raven?"
"Well..." Raven could already tell that she was just digging herself a hole, but she decided that she could not stop now that she had started, "I just don't think that ... you and Terra ... It just doesn't work."
Beast Boy stood up immediately.
"Raven, are you blind?" He said defensively, "Terra laughs at my jokes, thinks I'm awesome and actually likes me for who I am! And I think the same of her. How could you say something like that?"
Raven had seen Beast Boy mad at her before, and it had never really bothered her, but right now, listening to him talk more about how great Terra was, was making Raven have to hold back her tears. She looked down at the floor.
"I just don't think..." Raven said in a whisper.
"No Raven, you don't think, you always have something against someone. You can never just accept people the way they are. You know what I think? I think you are just jealous of Terra because she has something that you don't."
Raven looked up at him, the tears threatening to fall. She was sure he was going to say that Terra had him and Raven didn't.
"You don't have anyone who actually loves you," Beast Boy spat out before he left the room, not bothering to close the door.
Raven's tears fell one by one to the floor.
"I thought you did," she whispered to the empty room.
Cyborg was walking down the hallway. As he went past Raven's room, he noticed that her door was open. Out of curiosity, Cyborg poked his head in to her room.
"Hey, Rae?" He called out to see if she was there. He listened for a response and there was nothing. Cyborg shrugged and was about to leave the room when he heard a sniffling noise.
"Rae?" He repeated. Still no response. Cyborg ventured into the room, past the bookshelves, past her dresser, and to her bed, and still no sign of Raven. Cyborg scratched his head in confusion and then he heard a soft sob. He walked around to other side of the bed facing the window, and there was Raven, sitting on the floor against the bed, her arms wrapped around her legs. Cyborg sat down beside her.
"Raven? Are you okay?" he asked. Raven turned her head down and Cyborg noticed a tear falling down her cheek.
"Rae, what happened?" Cyborg said concerned, but stunned at the fact that Raven was crying.
Raven looked at Cyborg. She was trying to keep herself together, but she was afraid that if she started talking, she'd lose control of her emotions all together. She just shook her head at Cyborg and continued looking down.
Cyborg sat down and wiped away one of Raven's tears and said, "Raven, you can tell me, it's alright."
Raven sniffed one more time and spoke, trying as hard as she could to keep her voice from wavering.
"You wouldn't understand."
Cyborg looked at her seriously, "Try me."
Raven looked into Cyborg's eyes, debating whether or not to even try and begin to explain to him her mixed up girl feelings, but she saw trust in his eyes and decided that maybe if she told someone, she would feel better.
"It started a while back," Raven began and continued to tell Cyborg everything that had happened since Beast Boy brought her into his room to give her the book. Surprisingly to her, she never lost control once. She started off calmly, smiling at parts, then anger started in, quickly followed by sadness. The last part was harder for her to say, but she managed her way through it.
"He said what?" Cyborg exclaimed after Raven was done her story. Raven nodded her head.
"Oh, I'm going to get him," Cyborg said, anger in his face.
"No!" Raven protested, "He can't know!"
Cyborg looked at her in disbelieve.
"I just don't understand you girls," he said shaking his head, "How is a guy suppose to know you like him if you never tell him anything?"
Raven shrugged, "I don't really understand myself."
"I think you should tell him."
Raven looked at Cyborg like he was crazy.
"No, really," Cyborg said, "It would explain a lot to him."
Raven contemplated it for a minute, "But it wouldn't change anything. He'd still be with Terra."
Cyborg shrugged, "I'm still going to talk to him."
Raven opened her mouth, about to object, but Cyborg cut her off.
"I won't say anything about you, don't worry."
Raven still looked at him with a worried look on her face, but she trusted him. If Cyborg said he wouldn't say anything, he wouldn't.
A couple weeks later, Terra was gone forever, turned to stone. Things between me and Beast Boy stayed tense the whole while. When we found out Terra was working for Slade, I felt like saying "I told you so," so badly, but I couldn't bring myself to say it, not to anyone. So when Beast Boy came up to me that night, I was completely surprised.
It was about midnight, and Raven was in the kitchen making herself some herbal tea in the moonlight. She couldn't sleep. She was still shaken up by all the events that had happened that day. It all seemed like a dream to her, and she still couldn't get over the fact that Terra was really gone. Deep down, Raven knew Terra was starting to grow on her, and it wouldn't be fair not to admit that.
Raven set the kettle onto the stove to let the water get warm. The doors to the common's area opened and Raven looked up to see who it was. As she looked up, Beast Boy looked back at her. They both stopped and stared at each other for two seconds, and then Beast Boy broke off the eye contact and continued down the stairs. Raven returned to watching the kettle, waiting for it to whistle. She heard Beast Boy rummaging around in the fridge behind her. Not talking to each other felt so awful to her, so she decided to break the silence.
"What are you doing up so late?" Raven asked, still watching the kettle, little interest in her voice.
"I could ask you the same thing," Beast Boy said back, his head still in the refrigerator.
Raven gave up right there. She figured Beast Boy was not in the mood for talking. Not to her, anyway.
Beast Boy popped out of the refrigerator, the orange juice container in hand. He had to walk over by Raven to get a class out of the wall cabinet. He set the glass and the container on the counter and poured the juice.
"I can't sleep," Beast Boy said.
"Oh," Raven said, not very surprised. If she was finding it hard to sleep, Beast Boy must've been going through hell trying to get some rest.
The kettle softly started to whistle, signaling that it was done. Raven moved it to a cooler burner, brushed by Beast Boy to grab a mug and poured herself some water. The whole time neither one of the two looked at each other. She dunked the tea bag into the water a couple times, blew away the steam and took a sip.
"I guess you were right Rae," Beast Boy said.
For the first time in a long while, Raven looked at Beast Boy. His eyes were fixed on his glass of orange juice.
"What are you talking about?" Raven asked.
"You were right about Terra."
"Don't say that, Beast Boy, I only said that because-"
"No Raven," Beast Boy cut her off, "You were completely right. Terra wasn't right for me. She wasn't right for anyone. Every single word she said was a lie, and I was dumb enough to believe all of it." Beast Boy hung his head.
"Beast Boy..." Raven reached to touch Beast Boy's shoulder, but stopped herself mid-reach and recoiled her arm back to her side.
"I trusted her," Beast Boy went on, "And I thought ..." his voice broke, "I thought..."
He squeezed his eyes shut, pounded his fist against the counter and Raven saw a tear fall onto the surface.
Out of all the things Raven has seen Beast Boy do, she had never seen him cry before. She didn't have any idea what to say to him. They went from not even looking at each other to Beast Boy displaying his emotions right in front of her.
"Beast Boy, I'm sure there was a time where she did love you," Raven said, completing his thoughts, "But her mind was taken over by evil. Slade controlled everything she did. She changed."
Beast Boy didn't say anything.
Raven looked at him. Ever since Terra came, Raven had wished that she would leave forever, and Raven's wish came true, but now she felt horrible. Watching all the pain it was causing Beast Boy was hardly worth it. Raven realized he must of really loved her for him to be breaking down this hard.
Beast Boy still hadn't moved or reacted in anyway, so Raven went back to her original "comfort" plan and put her hand on his shoulder.
The next thing Raven knew, Beast Boy had his arms wrapped around her and his head was nuzzled into the side of her neck. Raven stood there frozen for a second, then slowly put her arms back around him. She had no idea how long they had been standing there, him clinging onto her, but she could feel her cloak getting wet from Beast Boy's tears.
Finally, Beast Boy got himself pulled together. He let go of Raven, and although he was facing her, he could not look at her, but only because he was slightly embarrassed.
"Thanks Raven," Beast Boy said, completely sincere, "You were always there for me."
"I'm still here for you," Raven said back, doing her best Raven-smile.
Things between me and Beast Boy had gotten better after that. We basically pretended that our whole not-speaking-to-each other episode never happened, and we didn't talk about it. We were practically back to the way we were before he had given me the book, but nevertheless, it surprised me when him and Cyborg asked me to go camping with them.
Raven was in her room packing for the camping trip that was going to take place later that night in the woods by the Titan Tower. She wasn't sure how it would be with just her, Cyborg and Beast Boy, but Robin and Starfire already had plans with each other so no one even bothered asking them to come along.
Raven pulled out from under her bed a shoe box and opened the lid. She carefully lifted out a black bikini, held it in front of her face and looked at it. Half of her hoped it would fit, and the other half hoped that it didn't so that there would be no chance of her having to wear it. They were going to be close to the shore, so she wanted to be prepared but at the same time she didn't want to go parading around in her bathing suit in front Beast Boy and Cyborg of all people. Raven sighed and stuffed the bikini into her duffel bag.
There was a knock on the door. Raven zipped up her bag, swung the strap over her shoulder and walked to the door. When she opened it, Cyborg was waiting for her.
"Rae, what's taking you so long? Me and BB are all ready to go!" Cyborg exclaimed.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm coming," Raven said back, carrying everything out the door.
Cyborg had found a clearing in the woods a few days earlier, and that's where the three of them decided to stay. Beast Boy built up a fire and Cyborg carried in a few larger logs and set them up around it. Raven felt bad because she hadn't done much to help, even though the guys told her that they didn't need anything. The day had gone well, and Raven didn't have to wear her bikini. Beast Boy insisted that they go swimming, but Cyborg couldn't go into water and Raven conviently "didn't bring anything to swim in." The three of them had spent the afternoon fishing (but not catching anything), swatting away bugs and setting up camp.
Evening had finally came and Raven, Beast Boy and Cyborg were all seated around the campfire, each on their own log. They had already roasted hot dogs and were now in the process of toasting marshmallows.
"Hey, Cy, pass me the bag!" Beast Boy shouted across the fire to Cyborg. Cyborg picked up the open package of marshmallows and flung it to Beast Boy, just missing the flames of the fire. Beast Boy took out a marshmallow and shoved it onto a sharpened stick.
"Did you want one, Rae?" Beast Boy asked Raven, who was on the log beside him.
"...Sure." Raven replied, taking the bag from Beast Boy, imitating the marshmallow-on-a-stick routine and held it over the fire.
It was getting to be that perfect golden brown colour, just getting soft enough to remove from the open flame, when Beast Boy's marshmallow just so happened to graze Raven's, sticking them together.
"Ugh, Beast Boy!" Raven cried out.
"Sorry!" Beast Boy quickly apologized, and hastily tried to unstick the two marshmallows by swiftly pulling his away from Raven's. Instead of the two coming apart, Raven's got pulled off her stick, fell off of Beast Boy's and dropped into the fire, quickly turning black, and soon turning into soot.
Raven turned to Beast Boy to glare at him. He was taking his marshmallow of of his stick, and the handed it to Raven.
"Here, Raven," Beast Boy said, "You can have mine." He was staring at her with his orby eyes, totally serious.
"Uhm ... thanks," Raven slowly said back, taking the marshmallow from Beast Boy's outstretched hand. She didn't want to eat it anymore, especially with Beast Boy looking at her like that, with big, sympathetic eyes. She turned away from him, her cheeks turning a faint pink. Neither one of them said anything.
Cyborg, feeling the awkwardness of the situation, stood up.
"I'm gunna go get some more fire wood," he stated, even though there was clearly enough wood to keep the fire going for at least another hour. He walked away from the clearing, leaving Beast Boy and Raven alone.
Raven, not knowing what to do with the marshmallow, subtly disposed of it, without Beast Boy seeing.
"Raven, do you remember the conversation we had a while back?" Beast Boy piped up.
"Which conversation?" Raven asked, "We've had a few."
"The one ..." Beast Boy paused, " ... back when we were playing that video game."
Raven's attention suddenly focused onto what Beast Boy was saying. She knew exactly which conversation he was talking about.
"Yeah, what about it?" Raven asked. She had thought about that night several times, but had recently stopped because it only made her think of the false hope she had received that night. "I've been thinking about it a lot lately." Beast Boy replied. He was staring into the fire in thought. Raven didn't know how to respond, so she followed Beast Boy's gaze into the fire and waited for him to continue.
"Remember how I told you all that stuff about soul mates?" Beast Boy said.
"Yeah, I remember." Raven said.
"I ... I think I've found her," Beast Boy confessed, he was really concentrating on the flames.
Raven didn't let herself get her hopes up again. She knew who he was talking about.
"Look Beast Boy, I'm sorry about Terra -" She started.
"No," Beast Boy interrupted, "She was already in my life before ... Terra showed up." He had to pause before saying Terra's name, the memory of her still obviously hurt him.
"Oh," Raven said, feeling bad for bringing Terra up, "Who is she?"
"The most beautiful girl I know," Beast Boy replied, then finally took his eyes off the fire and aimed them at Raven, "inside and out."
Beast Boy saying this triggered something in Raven's head. A memory? She couldn't quite put her finger on it. Raven chuckled.
"Beast Boy, I hate to break it to you, but I think Starfire is taken by Robin."
Beast Boy smiled and looked up into the sky.
"Raven, for as smart as you are, sometimes you can be so oblivious." he said. Raven was confused now.
"I just don't know who you're talking about," Raven replied sincerely. Beast Boy scooted himself right beside Raven on her log and took her hand in his.
"Raven, I'm ... I'm talking about you." Beast Boy looked straight into Raven's eyes, waiting for an answer, but Raven couldn't say anything. She figured her face must be fuchsia, it felt so warm to her.
"I ... I ..." Raven stammered. This was totally a shock to her. After all this time of pushing her feelings away into the back of her head, into a place where she hoped it would be forgotten, the sense of liking Beast Boy rushed into the front of her brain and all at once she couldn't believe that she was sitting there with the most amazing guy she knew, and he was holding her hand saying he thought she was his soul mate!
"Raven, please say something," Beast Boy said in a pleading voice.
"I ... Don't know what to say ..." was all Raven could spit out.
"So is that a good speechless or a bad speechless?" Beast Boy asked.
"G ... Good." Raven stuttered back, she was still completely frozen. Beast Boy gleamed.
Just at that moment Cyborg came bounding back into the clearing holding several large pieces of wood.
"I got the wood you guys!" Cyborg exclaimed, then stopped himself when he noticed Beast Boy sitting beside Raven and holding her hand. Both Beast Boy and Raven had snapped their heads to look at Cyborg when he started to talk, but their bodies had stayed frozen in place.
"I can't leave you two alone for 5 minutes," Cyborg said, shaking his head. Raven had finally seemed to come back to reality and slipped her hand out of Beast Boy's but smiling at him as she did it.
And that was that. Beast Boy finally owned up to his feelings, and I kind of felt bad for not saying anything back but I think he understood everything I didn't say because since then he has been giving me looks, like ones of pure joy. Like he is so happy to see me. I'm still not quite sure how I can make someone so amazing happy, but that look in his eyes, it gives me the best feeling ever. I am the luckiest girl alive. He makes me feel happy, like life is worth living. He makes me feel ... beautiful.