Hey all, Layamn here! This is my first Haruhi fic, and it's about VIDEOGAMES! The idea was inspired by Metropolis Kid's fic, "Alucard and the Xbox" (with it's very funny Halo 3 sequence), and superstarultra, who did a videogame based short or two in his story, "You got HaruhiRolled". Hope you all enjoy, and stay tuned after the fic for a special announcement.
"Damn it Kyon!" SOS1GOD shouted at her comrade, ThatOtherGuy. "He was right in front of you, why didn't you freaking shoot him?"
"Maybe bacause I didn't have any ammo from when you told me to 'Don't stop firing until you're out of ammo' thirty seconds ago!" ThatOtherGuy retorted back to the Brigade leader. "He wasn't even on my screen then!"
"Now now, let's all try to keep our tempers here," EsperPhantom said in an attempt to keep his teammates civil. "Otherwise we'll only end up tearing out each other's-"
"YOU SHOT ME!" Kyon exploded.
"Damn right I did," Haruhi replied without even a hint of remorse, "that's what you get for talking back to your Brigade Chief!"
"But that's gonna decrease our kill count!"
"So? It's not my problem you guys have no talent."
"You neither; you've been killed fifteen times already!"
"Alright, that tears it!"
"Hey, what are you?- Stop teabagging me!"
"No! It's what you get for being a loser!"
"Um, g-guys?" MA1D-chan asked nervously, "Which button is 'X'"?
"It's the blue one with an 'X' on it," Itsuki explained, happy to have a diversion from his two bickering squadmates.
"Mikuru!" Haruhi said, also happy for the distraction. "I told you to get familiar with the controls before we started! It just isn't done asking questions like that mid-game!"
"Yeah, like you'd know," Kyon spat.
"OK, Bub, now you're asking for it!" Haruhi raged as she proceeded to tackle the gopher of the SOS Brigade.
"Be quiet," Hax0reD intoned. See, unlike the other "n00bs", (well, except for maybe Itsuki), she was actually doing very well at the game; having more kills then all the others put together. Unfortunately, they were all for the others in the SOS Brigade.
Why you ask?
Well, I'll tell you; because the sixth player in their game, a "TheLayman1X", was kicking their asses every which way to Sunday, even Yuki if you can believe it. I mean, he was wearing the freaking "Recon" armor for crying out loud!
As Yuki tried to get him in her crosshairs, he suddenly turne around and leaped right over her, landing behind her and knifing her in the back with an Energy Sword before she had a chance to even turn around.
"Curses," she intoned, putting down the controller and heading to her favorite chair to read.
About three seconds later the match ended.
"I can't belive Yuki lost," Haruhi said, right in the middle of hog tying Kyon, "she's the best gamer we have."
"Most unfortunate indeed," Itsuki mused, "but I suppose there's bound to be some people out there better at Halo 3 than we are. After all, we only started playing yesterday; it's not as if we can become professional level gamers overnight. It takes time and practice."
"Koizumi, is there anything you don't have an opinion about?" Kyon grunted from the floor.
"Not really," Itsuki beamed, flashing one of his perfect(ly fake) smiles.
"Kyon," Haruhi announced, "as punishment for us loosing that Slayer match, you're gonna get Teabagged!"
Meanwhile, in a dark, dank basement somewhere in America, TheLayman1X sat on a ratty couch, chuckling to himself.
"Ah," he sighed, "all in another day's work. Stupid n00bs, never even saw me coming."
And with that, he shut down his Xbox and went over to his computer, deciding to write a fan fic about his recent exploits.
And that, my friends, is the closest I'll ever get to becoming a self insert.
Well, how did you like it? Does it make you want to write one of your own? If it does (and even if it doesn't), then write it down and send it to me; I'd be happy to host it here. (No, I'm not being lazy or trying to steal other people's ideas, that's just the way I planned on this fic going from the start. Don't worry, you'll all get full credit for your submissions.)