AN: Aigis X Minato oneshot.
Warning: spoilers for those who haven't finished the game and minor spoilers for the answer from the FEES version. I also changed the story line a little. You have been warned!
The lyrics are the English translation of a song by Pitty. I thought they fit Aigis so I took the freedom to use them.
A little notice to you who read the story "pancakes". I´m thinking of changing it to a three-shot.
Enjoy "Blue butterfly"
I didn´t realize it at first. He was laying there with his head in my hard and cold lap, resting quietly. It took a long time for me to understand that something wasn´t right with him. I´m still blaming myself for not realizing it sooner because if I did I might have been able to do something. He looked so calm and relaxed at he slipped through my fingers silently. He didn´t give me a chance to stop it.
Minato died in that moment, leaving everyone behind without a word or an explanation. The doctors couldn´t find the cause of death but the other´s members of SEES said he must have used too much power when he saved us all and defeated Nyx. He became tired and slept longer than usual until he finally wouldn´t wake up anymore. He happened to die on the rooftop when he was with me. I wonder if it had a secret meaning.
Minato made me feel human. He made me feel alive even though I´m not made of flesh and blood like all the other SEES members are. I knew that he was special the first time I saw him at the beach even though I didn´t remember he was the child I selfishly sealed death into. I swore to protect him to make up for my sin. I already had a sense of moral at that time. It didn´t seem as if he realized who I was at first and I believe that´s why he agreed to let me stay by his side.
The silent but caring lone-wolf changed something within me and he didn´t even need to open me up or use screws. He didn´t say much but each word that left those pale lips meant a lot to me and I will always treasure them. They´re all saved in my memory and I will not let them go easily, or so I thought.
His gentle touch made me feel warm and embarrassed, his kisses made me feel like I was on fire and I knew that I came to love him in a way that I shouldn´t been able to. He made me believe that I could be human and he said it was alright to be afraid. Minato said he loved me and didn´t think that my artificial body was something bad. I think he lied because what kind of human would like to kiss a machine that smells of oil, touch a body made of metal, spend time with a girl who can´t give him physical pleasure or offspring?
Was all that just my imagination?
I am a robot and can´t be alive; I´m only functioning. I can´t die I can only malfunction, I can always be repaired. Humans can´t be repaired and a life can´t be reset. I know that all too well but that didn´t change how my pretend heart ached when Minato disappeared. I´m able of feeling certain human feelings but my body will always remain lifeless and cold. I can´t change or run away from that but I wanted to in that moment. I wanted to hold him tightly without being afraid of crushing him, I wanted to kiss him deeply without fearing he would get an electric shock and I wanted to declare my love for him with the conclusion that I could make him truly happy. But I couldn´t and I didn´t have the time to. People say that love can save lives. Was my love for Minato not real enough?
He was the one that set me free but now when he´s gone I feel how the cage that is my own robotic body closes in on me again.
Somebody fix me
Where are my robot eyes?
I didn't now, I didn't realize
I always thought I was alive
triggers and fluid in place of joints
Even thought that
I had a heart beating
Nothing is organic
Everything is programmed
And I thought he had set me free
Minato´s death affected every member of SEES in a different way but I choose to withdraw myself from them and return to where I belong. I am merely an anti-shadow machine that isn´t needed any more and I hardly believe they would need me here. I´m returning to the place I was created so I can forget everything. I don´t stand my pretend heart ache any more, I don´t have a heart do I?
Handing over my evoker was easier than I thought but his…I´ve been holding on to Minato´s evoker all this time and I was scared that I would forget him if I left it there. My ocean blue eyes stare at the metallic gun as I put in on the table. Now I want to forget. Even though my body doesn´t have the same body heat as others I feel how my hand grows strangely cold without the evoker in my palm. The table is full of evokers and the red SEES ribbons we wore: everyone are letting go of the dark hour and their ability. I stare at the table a little longer before I turn to leave.
"Aigis, are you going somewhere?" Fuuka asks me.
"Correct." I answer indifferently as I keep on walking.
"She´s returning to the laboratory and won´t be staying at the dorm any longer." Mitsuru explains calmly with one leg crossed over the other.
"What?" Junpei flinches.
"Why, Aigis-san?" Ken asks in a desperate voice.
"My reason for existing is gone and my mission failed." I tell them in a monotone voice. "I need to return home."
"Isn´t this your home?" Junpei exclaims loudly. "He wouldn´t have liked you leaving, Ai-chan!"
Junpei´s words trigger something within me and I stops walking only to glare at him over my shoulder. My plastic eyes changes size as they locate the target. This is something that makes the man mentioning Minato flinch once more.
"Minato is dead." The words are extremely hard to say but the coldness in my voice surprises even myself.
Minato lived like a butterfly. He had a short and painful life but he used his years well, he said that every day mattered. A butterfly is constantly evolving. From a caterpillar to a cocoon to the final stage as a beautiful butterfly. Minato grew from a child, a vessel of death, to a teenager who fought monsters normal people didn´t know existed. The butterfly can only handle one season before it dies and withers away. Minato was just the same: constantly growing stronger until he suddenly fell asleep and died. He reminds me of a strong but fragile blue butterfly who accepted its fate without any complaints.
Loud gasps can be heard in the lounge and I know that my words hurt them. They´re looking at me with sadness in their eyes but I can´t bring myself to care anymore. It´s like some kind of a wall has build up between us again, I think I´m trying to protect myself from feeling too much. I´m not supposed to feel anything else than what I was programmed to feel. My hurting body and heart makes me believe I´m malfunctioning and needs to be repaired.
The laboratory is almost empty but I´m enjoying the solitude. I can hear how water hits the floor somewhere in the distance as I walk down the corridor followed by some scientists. They´re all very happy to see me again because this makes them able to investigate me more. I hope they´ll be able to fix me. They lead me to a tube and tell me to enter. I find no reason to disobey them.
I hope they can make me forget.
But here they come again and
I know what they're going to do
Reinstall the system
I can´t feel anything the next time I open my eyes. I´m empty and surrounded by a black fog I don´t recognize or find a reason to dislike. It´s there just as I am so I don´t question its existence. Men in white robes arrive to unplug me from the tube and I follow their orders like an obedient child. Or should I say dog? I don´t know the difference any longer but I just know that I have to follow their orders. That is how it should be.
"The updated version of the sole remaining anti-shadow weapon Aigis seems to be running smoothly." A man speaks loudly with a smile on his lips. "What is my name?"
I utter a name I never heard before loudly and the man´s smile grows. It´s like they have made me recognize him; programmed me to know him and respect him. I answer all of his questions without thinking or hesitating for one moment. The answer is there and things have never felt easier. It´s like I already have all the answers.
There is no pain anymore and I don´t even recall being hurt ever before.
After a long check up they let me start to take on missions again. The missions aren´t like the one I once knew because SEES already annihilated the dark hour but the scientists made sure to use all of my gun power. I don´t question them because I find no reason too. I´m merely their tool and tools don´t ask questions about how they are used.
I´ve lost the humanity that Minato and the other SEES members taught me but I don´t care.
I don´t care about anything any more.
Think, speak, buy, drink
Read, vote, don't you forget
Use, be, listen, say
Have, reside, spend and live
Think, speak, buy, drink
Read, vote, don't you forget
Use, be, listen, say
The days look the same to me and I can no longer recognize day from night. Time passes quickly, weeks go by without any change in my schedule at the lab. I stay in my tube, have a check up, destroy some targets, take on missions and get back to the tube again. There we a change on day; a woman came to see me.
"Aigis, I came to see you." She says with a hint of a smile on her lips.
"Kirijou Mitsuru-san." I address her with her full name with an added "san" of politeness.
Her name is registered in my memory so I know who she is and what she can do, but it feels that something is wrong when I watch her. The smile on her red colored lips fades slowly until it´s completely gone. I know who she is, so clearly, but I don´t remember her at the same time. I stare at her through my robot eyes; scanning.
"Yes." The tone she uses is a fraction colder than when she spoke before. "Long time no see."
I´ve no memory of meeting her before so her words trigger something within me, the feeling of that something is wrong grows. A buzzing sound can be heard as I try to comprehend what she´s saying.
"Are you alright?" She asks me with wide eyes. "Smoke is—"
"I´m functioning." I interrupt her.
She flinches visibly. The men who accompanied her starts to talk but I pay no attention to their plans. It´s the young woman I´m interested about. She acts strangely around me and I can´t read her movements as easily as the other humans there.
"Aigis, we want to see a demonstration of your powers."
After about ten minutes of me shooting down targets in the arena the scientists stop me. They all look pleased but the Kirijou girl looks almost frightened. She approaches me after a while of silence.
"You´ve become a lot stronger." She comments bluntly.
"We upgraded it some days ago." A man tells her.
"It?" She repeats while looking at the man with cold eyes.
I can´t read her at all as she turns to face me with a smile. Why is she bothering smiling at me? I wonder.
"Aigis, I just want you to know that you´re always welcome at the dorm. Please come and visit, Junpei misses you."
"The dorm?" I repeat. The dorm…, Junpei?
"You don´t need to be here if you don´t want to."
The sound of her high heels hitting the metallic floor echoes as she walks away. Her long hair moves up and down with every graceful step she takes. A man yells my name to get my attention and I obey, but a feeling tells me I should have followed Kirijou Mitsuru instead. Why, I wonder.
"Everything went well. Its last memory seems to have been completely erased."
When I got into my tube that night I started thinking, something that I hasn´t been able to do for days. The smell of oil and smoke surrounds me as the alarm goes off. I might over-heat.
No sir,yes sir,
No sir yes sir
The next day started as all the others but I´ve changed. I´m starting to question everything the scientists say, whatever I do, every thought that comes to mind. A sudden need to get all the puzzle pieces together strikes me and I start over-analyzing everything around me. As I fight I wonder if that is the only reason for my existence.
The pain starts to return slowly but I can´t understand it. The men doesn´t notice how I´m turning human again and they don´t intend to repair me either. I´m slowly falling apart. Piece by piece but no one is noticing and I can´t find the words to tell the world about it.
I missed a target and the men finally noticed. They surround me like a swarm of insects, talking with each other angrily. I´m breaking and a feeling tells me I´ve done it before. A feeling. I feel sick in my stomach, my chest aches, my arms feel too heavy with all that gun power and my head is in a mess.
"Something is wrong, I need you to reinstall the system again." A stern voice orders.
"Yes sir!" Several others answer.
Are they going to save me? "Save", isn´t the word "fix" the correct term? The men let me continue the practice season and decide, after more missed targets, that I need to get some new programs installed immediately. They´re talking about resetting me and start over again if they don´t find the flaw.
The tube feels narrower as I enter it to go into sleep-mode. The thick glass walls keeps me imprisoned like a bird in a cage. Hours pass by but I can´t sleep. My head is spinning with thoughts that shouldn´t be there. That is when I notice that I´m not alone.
A butterfly? A small blue butterfly rests on the floor beneath me. The insect doesn´t have a clue that I easily could end its life. That´s when something starts to change within me in a hurtful manner. Strange pictures pop up randomly: all of a young man I don´t recognize. A Piercing pain invades my body all of a sudden and I bend over out of reaction. My head hits the glass and the collision almost breaks the tube into thousand pieces. It´s not pain, I´m only programmed to act this way when I´m starting to malfunction. Am I hurt? Did someone sneak up on me? No. Only the little innocent butterfly.
Why am I hurting like this? What is it that I can´t remember? Why a butterfly?
Somebody save me
Where are my human eyes?
Blue eyes widen as the butterfly suddenly appears in front of my eyes as if it tries to comfort me. The small creature lands on my nose carelessly as if it has no idea of who I am or what I could do to it. It´s beautiful in a very sad way, why I do not comprehend. A strange feeling enters me as it flaps its wings back and forth and I stare at it with a mesmerized gaze. That is when all of my memories crash down on me.
Reality hits me in the face and the pain intensifies. How could I forget, how could I even think of forgetting my memories of him? Minato, the dorm, SEES, the shadows, Tartarus, Nyx…my…friends…Every single memory repeats itself in front of my eyes during the time of a minute. It feels like my heart is going to burst.
The sound of liquid falling to the floor is ear-breaking and it makes me look down. It´s raining? No… Fingers touch my cheeks and I notice that I´m leaking oil. Brown liquid creates rivers on my face until they leave my artificial skin. No, I´m not leaking…I´m crying. The butterfly stays still on my nose, looking at me in a deep silence.
Robots can´t cry, but humans can. My eyes turns crystal clear.
I´m going home.
AN: I hope you enjoyed it. Please R&R!