This is the first in a short series of shorts im calling Damn Naruto's Friends. They is light SasuNaru, but the others will have more.

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto


Sasuke Uchiha will never forget his first day at Konoha High School. It was the day were he met the two dumbest idiots in the world, the only person smarter than him except for his brother, the day he had his first kiss, the day he made his first enemy, and the day he fell in love. And on this day, Sasuke witnessed first hand just how far real friends would go to help each other.

His first day at Konoha, he met Kiba Inuzuka, also known as "Idiot number one". Kiba was a trouble maker, big time. On this first day, he hadn't really taken the time to meat Kiba, but he already knew that Kiba was someone he would try to avoid. At all cost.

In Sasuke's first class of the day, home room to be exact, he had been placed in the desk behind Kiba. The brunette was beyond annoying. With the way he would yell across the room to his friend Choji, a pudgy guy that never stopped eating. Kiba also had a small dog hidden within his gym bag, it was pretty well train, didn't bark once all class, the only way Sasuke even knew was because he saw Kiba slip the small pup into the bag before he walked into the class. Sasuke already decided he wouldn't turn the boy in, but the dog fur was bothering his allergies.

Kiba had said hi to Sasuke, told him the name of his dog too, but Sasuke didn't say hello back. Kiba had deemed him a prick after that. Not that Sasuke cared, he didn't want to go to school here and he didn't want to make any friends. So Kiba became the trouble making idiot to stay away from, and Sasuke left for his next class.

This time, in math, he sat beside Choji, the fat kid who was friends with the idiot. Again Choji had said hello to Sasuke, chips fell onto the raven's desk as he did so. It grossed Sasuke out. So, again, instead of returning the greeting, he glared and deemed Choji as a gluttony to stay away from. Not that cared how much the boy weighed, but he did care about the crewed chip crumbs that now littered on his desk.

Choji though was soon replaced by a blond girl, with the oh so original hearts in her eyes. It happened all the time. She said her name was Ino, not that Sasuke cared. He gave her a "hn" before turning away and giving the girl the cold shoulder for the rest of class. Girls never seemed to understand that he would never be interested.

When math was over he found himself in history, where he was unable to focus. Why, you ask. Well it may of had something to do with the snoring behind him. In the desk behind his own, sat a dark haired boy, asleep in his chair. He learned the boy's name was Shikamaru Nara when attendance was called. Of course the boy answered in a loud snore, but it was enough for their teacher to check him off for the day.

What Sasuke would never be able to understand was how the Nara had gotten every answer right through on the pop quiz they had gotten that day. He was sure the boy never even opened his eyes. But the fat boy Choji, who was in this class as well, had called Shika a genies and was surprised his friend had turned down the offer to skip the next grade.

Sasuke had come to the conclusion, that Shikamaru was smart. Smart enough that he could befriend at least. But the boy's snoring was getting on his nerves so he decided to forget the idea of friendship, and place the Nara on the "Stay away list", like the others.

Next had come lunch, where he tried to sit alone. When he had found an empty table, girls had flocked to it and fought for the seats closes to him. The two winners were a blond that he met before and a girl with light pink hair who said she was called Sakura. Again, Sasuke didn't care. When the two girls grabbed his arms and started fighting for his love, he had left the table, completely forgetting about his half eaten tomato.

He ended up at a fountain outside. It had less students than inside the cafe, but the people who were around where the same ones he was trying to avoid.

On the fountain's wall sat Kiba, Choji, and Shikamaru, along with a boy in all green, a short blond, and a pissed off looking red head. It was a wonder that Choji could still be eating and the Shikamaru was somehow able to sleep with Kiba and the blond arguing so loudly.

"Hey," Screamed Kiba, gaining everyone's attention. "Look who it is." He pointed to Sasuke, "That's the prick I told y'all about."

Sasuke had glared at the boy, not appreciating the name. The Boy in all green had stepped in though, scolding the dog owner.

"Kiba, that's not nice at all." He had screamed. "It's his first day at our school, he could use some new friends. Hello new youth! My name is Rock Lee, and I welcome you to this here school and to our circle of friends-"

"Shut up Lee." The red head said while masking Lee behind the head. the pout on Lee's face caused the blond, who was playing with Akamaru, Kiba's dog, to giggle. The sound was annoying but brought music to Sasuke's ears. He ended up staring at the blond without noticing so, but the blond did after a minute, and apparently didn't appreciate it.

"What do you want bastard?" The blond snapped.

Sasuke just glared at him, turned back around, muttered "Morons" under his breathe, and left. Three more names to add to his list.

After lunch he had English and must to his dismay, the blond boy and two girls from before were with him. The two girls were in the back along with the blond boy, their teacher hadn't arrived yet, but no one even noticed. Sasuke could hear the conversation the three were having, he wasn't eaves dropping or anything like that, the three just spoke really loud compared to the rest of the call.

"He's just so dreamy." Sakura and Ino said in sync.

"He's not dreamy, he's a bastard." Was the blond boy's reply.

"Hey!" Sakura yelled as Ino punched the boy in the head.

"What right to have to call him that?" The other girl yelled.

"He called me a moron." Whined the blond. He was cradling his head where he could now fell a bump.

"You are a moron Naruto," The pink hair girl teased.

"The biggest on we know." The other girl added.

Both girls had laughed at the blond boy as he whined and pouted. Sasuke was right. The boy really was a moron.

"Don't you wish you could just kiss him?" Ino cooed as she eyed Sasuke from across the room.

"I know right," Sakura said while resting her chin in one hand. "But he's just to mysterious to approach."

To Sasuke, that was bullshit. At lunch the girls had no problem approaching him, no problem latching on to him either.

"That's bullshit!" Well Naruto agreed with him. "He's not that special. If you want to kiss the guy just go kiss the guy."

Sasuke hit his head on his desk. He really wanted to punch that moron. Now the girls would think that they could just walk up to him and kiss him like it was nothing at all. If these girl started getting ideas, at least Sasuke knew who to kill.

"We can't do that Naruto!"

"Hey, he'll think we're crazy!"

"Fine then," Naruto said, chair screeching as he pushed it back to stand up. The blond started walking to the front of the class and called from over his shoulder. "I'll show you it not that hard."

Before Sasuke could think or the girls could even yell, he saw Naruto in front of him, the blond's hand was on his chin. Naruto leaned in, eyes closed, and lips pouted until he closed the distance between them, trapping Sasuke in a kiss. Surprisingly, Sasuke didn't hate it, he didn't even fight back. He did the opposite actually.

Sasuke's arms wrapped their selves around Naruto's thin waist, pulling the boy closer to his body. Naruto's hands somehow had left his face and encircled around Sasuke's shoulders before he was pulled into Sasuke's lap. This was Sasuke's first kiss, and it was with a guy, he never thought it would be as heated as it was. Mouths were pried open, tongues had touched, His hands roamed against the other boy's hips, and a moan escaped from one of them.

"Naruto. New boy. Would you mind breaking apart?" A very cheery voice called out. Naruto was off Sasuke's lap in a second, his face was blushed a deep red, he refused to look at Sasuke as he walked back to his desk.

"Yes sir Kakashi." The blond called back at his desk. The two girls were wide eyed and their mouths were agape. Sasuke turned to see his teacher, who was half an hour late, Kakashi. The man was, in one word, strange. his hair was gray but he looked young, scratch that - he sounded young. The lower half of his face was covered by a brightly colored scarf and his left eye had an eye patch over it, leaving only his right eye for Sasuke to see.

"Hello, you must be Sasuke Uchiha," The teacher said with a smile (?) Sasuke just nodded, not knowing what to say. Kakashi leaned down until he was looking Sasuke right in the eye, his own eye was glinting mischievously. "Was the kiss good, Sasuke?" Again Sasuke was at a lost for words. Should he nod yes or shake his head no, he didn't know. Thankfully Naruto had thrown an eraser from the back of the room, successfully hitting Kakashi's cheek.

"S-shut up Kakashi, you damn p-pervert!" Naruto studdered, the blush on his cheeks even redder, if that was possible.

"Oh," Kakashi smile (?) again and walked calmly to his desk. Once he sat down the whole class knew he had to be grinning. "So it was good then!"

Yes, Sasuke thought, ignoring Naruto's calls of 'pervert' and ' how dare you'. It was very good.

Class preceded as usual, or at least usual for this class.v Kakashi didn't teach a thing and read his porn books instead. Naruto went back to talking to the girls while Sasuke mussed over and over about his first mind blowing kiss.

"You little shit." Ino whispered harshly and smacked Naruto in the back of the head. "I thought you said you didn't like him.

"I said he was a bastard, I never said he wasn't hot." A grin was pasted on Naruto's face, Sakura smacked in off.

"I can't believe you," She hissed stomping on his foot. "That was the third guy you kissed this year that we've called hot."

"It's times like this I regret having a gay friend." Ino sighed with a pout on her face.

"Hey you two should be thanking me." Naruto protested. "I saved you both the trouble of fighting over him when he's obviously not interested in either of you-OW!"

"Shut up!" Both girls yelled, their fist still above the blond's head where they had hit him. Sasuke had turned around to see what the was yelling was about when he saw the pouting Naruto. for a second their eyes met before Naruto turned away with a pink blush once again on his face.

Cute Sasuke thought and smirked before turning back to the book he was reading. Maybe Naruto should be taken off my 'stay away list'.

Class went on with no more outburst from the back. Kakashi had finished a chapter of his book and told the class to pull out the book they were reading and supplied Sasuke with an extra that he kept in class. He asked one kid to start reading.

"That same evening, I remember, we all sat on the till late-"

"Woof, woof!"

The student stopped reading, along with the rest of the class. Kakashi looked up from his book and curiously looked around the class.

"Did anyone else hear-"

"Woof, woof, woof."

"-That!"

Naruto looked up from his book to see Akamaru jumping high enough to reach the glass window in the wooden door. He knew that if Kakashi saw the dog, then Kiba would be in trouble. So to help his friend, he did the only thing he could think of. Jumping out from his desk and running to the door to grab the dog before Kakashi could see him. Though, what teach would be blind enough to see a student open the class room door right in front of them?

"Mr. Uzumaki, where do you plan on going?"

Naruto, who was kneeling down to grab the lost puppy, shot up quickly, stuffed the dog into his large sweat jacket, ans spun around. "No where sir."

"Woof!" Naruto's jacket agreed.

"Naruto," Kakashi said smiling (?), letting Naruto know he already knew what was going on. "Did your coat just bark?"

"No!" Naruto answered all to quickly.

"Then what may i ask is under your coat?"

"My stomach."Naruto said dumbfounded as he held his struggling coat closed at the top, an arm slung under the moving bulge, keeping it up.

"Really," Kakashi walked closer to his blond student, eye curved with amusement. "I don't quite remember you being so...big."

Naruto began to sweat, his eyes looked back and forth for some help before he shouted the first thing that came to mind. "I'm pregnant!" Some of the class members laughed. Along with Kakashi. "Don't judge me!"

"Now really Naruto. Pregnant! Does Iruka know you're being sexually active?" Kakashi laughed even more when he saw the blush on Naruto's face. "Who's the father?"

"Um...um, the father is...well me. Because I am a male Kakashi. I thought even you could tell that."

"Silly silly Naruto. I meant who knocked you up?" Again students laughed.

"Um...well, the one who 'knocked me up' was...um, what's his name-"

"Me!" Sasuke said, springing up from his seat. He didn't know why he said that, but he could tell that Naruto needed help; he too had saw the dog jumping by the window. The girls in the back giggled loudly.

"Yeah!" Naruto shouted "He's the dad, um...Choji what's his name again?" Sasuke looked to the other end of the class room. He didn't even know that Choji was in this class as well.

"Sasuke-"

"Sasuke! Yes It's Sasuke's." Naruto said with a large grin in place. "Yes, that was why we were kissing earlier too, because i told him we're having a baby."

"Woof, woof, woof." Naruto coat started to growl and move more then before. A licking sound came from Naruto's stomach before the blond yelpped in pain.

"Damn it he bit me- I mean," Naruto looked to Choji who was pointing at the door frantically, signaling for Naruto to run. "My water broke! Oh God the pain! Pain! Kakashi, may I be excussed to go to the nurse and give birth, please?"

With a slight chuckle, Kakashi wrote a hall pass and nodded to Naruto. "That's fine, I don't know anything about birthing babies." Naruto took the slip graciously and ran out the room.

"Sir," Choji called. "I think I should go with him, to help."

"Ah, good thinking Choji, but no." Kakashi said and started writing up another pass. "I think Sasuke should go, being the father and all."

Without a word Sasuke took the pass and ran out the door after Naruto. He caught the blond half way down the hall when he was letting the puppy out from underneath his clothes.

"Hey," Naruto turned around to see Sasuke running towards him.

"Hey," He smiled back. "Thanks for the help back there. Now Kiba won't call you a prick anymore when he hears to help save his baby." Naruto chuckled as he pointed to the small dog walking beside him. Sasuke just "Hn"ed and began walking next to the blond. When they reached the stairs leading to a hall of empty planing rooms, Sasuke spoke.

"You Know," He smirked knowing that he had Naruto's attention. "You looked pretty happy back there about having my baby."

"W-what?" Naruto was just too cute when he blushed. "You bastard, why would I be happy about that?"

"Hn. To bad then, because you know, if we knew each other better and if you did have the ability to give birth, I wouldn't mind getting you pregnant." His smirk only increased when Naruto blushed more and stuttered words he couldn't understand.

"Cute," Sasuke thought aloud. Naruto turn to glare at him.

"What you say?"

"I said you're cute, moron." Naruto narrowed his eyes further and stepped closer to Sasuke, trying to be intimidating. Just as Naruto was opening his mouth to reply, Sasuke swepped down and captured the blond's mouth as his own. Naruto kissed back almost instantly, arms wrapping around Sasuke again and trying to deepen the kiss. But just as Sasuke was about to let the blond, someone just so happened to pop up.

Kiba, Naruto's damn friend.

"Dudes! What the hell, Naruto. You're kissing the prick! Shika was right, damn now I owe him money!" Kiba shouted through the empty halls; he was now holding Akamaru who barked in agreement with his master.

"S-shut up Kiba!" The red face Naruto yelled.

Kiba had walked away laughing, leaving the two alone again and calling back behind his shoulder.

"Congratulations on the baby you two!"

And so that was Sasuke's first day at Konoha High School. By the end of the day he had Choji in every single one of his classes. The two girls, Sakura and Ino giggled every time they saw him. Kiba, who had heard what had happened in Kakashi's class had told the rest of the school. He had another class with Naruto and the red head named Gaara. Gaara tried to choke him. And he left with a date for Saturday night.


The reading from the book is one i just picked up randomly. it's called 'A bottomless Grave' by i dont know.

Again, this is just the first short in a little series of shorts called Damn Naruto's Friends. I know this one didn't have much to do with Sasuke damning Naruto's friend but the others will.

Thank you. Please review. And if you see a spelling mistake please tell me.