"I'm worried man." Dean wiped the water from his face and stared at the mirror; the darkness under his eyes was definitely worse than usual. He slept like crap the night before. "Where'd that SOB send Cas and Kayla?" He turned towards the living room but Sam wasn't there. He'd been there a second ago. "Sam?"
Sam had definitely left the room already. Dean gathered his things and went to the car, he tried calling his cell phone but got the voice mail. With a grimace he started the car.
He looked in the back seat and saw nothing. "Sam? Where are you?"
"I don't know."
The voice came from the radio and he looked down. A small meter of lights strobed up and down as Sam spoke. "Oh crap. I don't think we killed the trickster."
Sam was in the car, hell, Sam was the car. His poor Impala.
The pieces fell together fast enough after that. Cas had told them this thing was too powerful to be a trickster and it sure as hell was right in the middle of the heaven and hell war. There was really only one thing left to do.
"Are you sure this is going to work?" Sam's voice drifted from the Impala as Dean closed the trunk.
"No, but I don't know what else to do." He looked up. "Alright you son of a bitch! We'll do it!"
"Should I honk?"
The 'trickster' walked up to them and looked the car over with a smile. "Wow, Sam, look at the rims on you."
"Okay boys, ready to go quietly?"
"Not so fast. No one's going anywhere until Sam has opposable thumbs."
"What's the difference? Satan's gonna ride his ass one way or another." But he saw that it wasn't negotiable and snapped his fingers. Sam climbed out of the passenger seat. "Happy?"
Dean glanced back. "Just tell me one thing. Why didn't the stake kill you?"
He hesitated. "I am the trickster."
"But maybe you're not."
Sam dropped his lighter onto the ground and the circle of oil lifted around him.
"Maybe you've always been an angel."
He laughed, like he was insulted. "A what? Somebody slip a mickey into your power shake kid?"
"I tell you what. You just jump out of the holy fire and we'll call it our mistake."
He laughed again but it slowed to a surrendering expression. The outdoors around them was gone and replaced with the warehouse they had walked into God knows how long ago.
"Well played boys, well played. Where'd you get the holy oil?"
"Well you might say we pulled it out of Sam's ass."
"Where'd I screw up?"
"You didn't." Sam answered. "Nobody gets the jump on Cas like you did."
"Mostly it was the way you talked about Armageddon. Call it personal experience, but nobody gets that angry unless they're talking about their own family."
"So which one are you? Grumpy, sneezey, or douchey?"
He looked at Sam. "Gabriel, okay? They call me Gabriel."
"Gabriel, the archangel."
"Okay Gabriel, how does an archangel get to be a trickster?"
He shrugged. "My own personal witness protection. Skipped out of heaven, had a face transplant, carved out my own little corner of the world. Then you guys had to screw it up."
"And what did daddy say when you ran off and joined the pagans?"
"Daddy doesn't say anything about anything."
"Why'd you ditch?"
"Can you blame him? His brothers are heavenly douche nozzles." Dean pointed out.
"You shut your cake hole. You don't know anything about my family. I loved my father, my brothers, loved them. But watching them turn on each other, tear out each other's throats? I couldn't bear it! So I left, and now it's happening all over again."
"So help us stop it."
"It can't be stopped."
"You want to see the end of the world?"
"I want it to be over! I have to sit back and watch my own brothers kill each other thanks to you two! Heaven, hell, I don't care who wins, I just want it to be over."
Sam didn't want to listen to it. There had to be a way out. "It doesn't have to be like that. There has to be some way to pull the plug."
"Oh you don't know my family. What you call the apocalypse, we call Sunday dinner. That's why there's no stopping this, because this isn't about a war. This is about two brothers that loved each other, and betrayed each other. You'd think you'd be able to relate."
"What are you talking about?"
He looked between them to confirm their confused faces and whistled while he shook his head. "You sorry sons of bitches. Why do you think you two are the vessels. Think about it. Michael, the big brother. Loyal to an absent father. An Lucifer, the little brother. Rebellious of daddy's plan. You were born to this boys, it's your destiny. It was always you!" He raised his hands to the sky. "As it is in heaven, so must it be on Earth. One brother has to kill the other."
"What the hell are you saying?"
"Why do you think I've always taken an interest in you? Because from the moment dad flipped on the lights around here, we knew it was always gonna end with you. Always."
But Dean refused as usual to accept any of the destiny crap. There was no such thing as destiny. "No, that's not gonna happen."
"I'm sorry, but it is." He sighed. "Guys, I wish this were a TV show. Easy answers, endings wrapped up in a bow, but this is real. And it's gonna end bloody for all of us. That's just how it's gotta be." His voice shifted. "So, boys, now what? Stare at each other for all eternity?"
"Well first of all, you're gonna bring Kayla and Cas back from wherever you stashed them."
He tilted his head, bargaining. "Will you settle? I'll give you the girl."
"We could always dunk you in holy oil and deep fry ourselves an archangel."
"That's just greedy." He snapped, and Cas and Kayla appeared behind them, looking beaten and exhausted.
Kayla caught her breath and wiped some of the blood off her chin. She smiled brightly. "Hey guys."
"Are you okay?"
"Oh yeah." She took a deep breath. "Great."
But Castiel was focused elsewhere. "Gabriel."
"Hey bro. How's the search for daddy going? Let me guess, horrible?"
"Hey shut the hell up." Kayla snapped, a little more defensive than intended.
Gabriel raised an amused eyebrow. "Cute Cas, but shouldn't you get something bigger than a Yorkie to bodyguard? Go for a Rott at least."
He didn't answer.
"Okay, we're done here." Dean backed up. "Come on Sam."
"Um, okay? Hey guys? So what, you're just gonna leave me here forever?"
Dean stopped at the door. "No, we're not. Because we don't screw with people the way you do. And for the record," he was pissed now. "This isn't about some prized fight between your brothers, or some stupid destiny that can't be stopped. This is about you being too afraid to stand up to your family!" He reached over and pulled the fire alarm, making the sprinklers turn on. "Don't say I never did anything for you."
Authors Note: antariangirl93 I did this for you! I'm gonna try to finish off season 5 before season 6 starts. talk about a deadline!