Ok everyone I am so sorry that I have not updated. But here I am and here's the next chapter and I am sorry if it's not the best. I was trying to go for the, I am sad and I don't know what to do without her feel. So thanks for reading and enjoy! Thank you guys sooo much for all the reviews and adding me onto your favorite author/story list! Xoxo
She's in a coma. She's in a coma.
Those words kept repeating in my head, over and over again. I keep seeing Bella in the hospital, in her room just laying there only breathing not moving. She was still, not a sound came from her. The only sounds that came from the room were the sounds of the machines attached to her, to keep her alive.
This is the picture in my head that I see when I go see her, every day when I go to see her. I sit in her room for hours begging for a response from her. It's the same answer every day, quite, still, no answer at all. This is what has become of my Bella.
After a month I couldn't take it anymore. I gradually stopped going and stayed in bed looking out the window. I have become the shell of my former self. I barely ate, slept, and lived anything. If Bella was gone so was I. She was my reason for existence, to breathe and to live. I can't live without her. No matter how corny that sounds it is true.
This was the beginning of me going in and out of conscious. I don't know if I am reliving memories, dreaming or in reality. One thing I do remember clearly is Carlisle saying she was in a coma.
Carlisle does all he can to wake Bella up. He has tried day and night. He feels like he has failed her. He is not the man he used to be. He spends all his time at the hospital.
I remember one day when Carlisle lost it. It was just me, Esme, and Carlisle; we were in Bella's room. Carlisle kept looking at her clipboard, the machines multiple times, taking notes until he got frustrated and suddenly threw the clipboard across the room at the wall and started crying.
Esme went up to him and held him.
"I've failed her Esme. This is my fault. I should have gone to the school the first time it happened." he sobbed into her shoulder. It's not his, its all mine.
"Carlisle this isn't your fault. You did what any other person would do. You are doing everything you can to wake her up." I said to him "If anything this is my entire fault, she is in a coma because she was protecting me. She got shot with a fun because of me."
"You look here Emmett McCarty! I am only going to tell you his once. This is not your fault and if Bella was here right now she would say that this was not your fault. This isn't anybody's fault, if anything it was that supposed teacher this is all his fault and Bella would agree with me." Esme said.
I just looked back at Bella begged her again to wake up. Esme was right Bella would say that none of this is our fault.
None of this should have happened, I thought while I was laying bed. Before I heard someone barge into my room.
"That's it Emmett! You need to get up, shower and eat!" my momma yelled at me ripping the blankets off of me.
"No." I could hear how hoarse my voice is, days without talking. I felt the bed shift.
"Now you look here Emmett McCarty! I am your momma and I hate to see my son look like this. Now if Bella was here she would be tellin' you that you need to get up and live on. Look here Emmett it's been a month. Bella told you to live on. I know she would have said this too, if she's anything like her momma. Now get up and dressed you are going to school tomorrow and then football practice." momma yelled her Tennessee accent coming out even more.
Now I was starting to feel guilty. Bella told me move on and live she would be here saying the same thing if she was here. I nodded reluctantly.
"Fine I'll go tomorrow." I said
I hope I'm doing the right thing.
Alright here it goes. I'm at school now. I thought puling into the parking lot. I see the gang in our usual spot. I walk up to them.
"Hey guys." I said
They all looked surprised that I was here, I wouldn't blame them. I haven't really been doing anything.
"Hey Em. Surprised to see you here at school."
I chuckled slightly "Yeah well let's say my momma yelled at me."
"I told you it would work." Jasper said.
"Wait what? What are you talking about?" I asked confused, looking at all of their faces, one by one.
"Well we have all tried to get you to come back like Bella would want, so we went to Momma McCarty instead. She did her job alright." Jasper said.
"You guys are the best you know that. I guess I needed that wake up call. I just wonder if I'm doing the right thing right now." I wondered out loud.
"Don't worry Em just think about school and football right now. That is what Bella would have wanted. You're not the only one hurting you are just hurting more then all of us." Alice said hugging me.
"Thanks Pixie. I think I needed to hear that. Now let's get to class." I said and at this moment is when I felt some type of hope again for Bella.
I went through the day everything went alright until I had to go see the room where it all happened at. That's when all the memories I have blocked came rushing back. I turned around and ran to the football field. I sat on the bleachers until the last period of the day was done. I saw a shadow on the bleachers beside me. I looked up and saw it was Coach.
"You know Emmett this team hasn't been the same since you have been gone." Coach said.
"I'm sorry Coach there isn't much I can say to that besides the fact that I have tuned out the past month." I said looking down at my hands.
"I understand what you are going through Emmett. I went through the almost same thing when I was your age. Except my sister didn't make it out and I blamed myself for it all the time. I learned to forgive myself after years and years." he said looking out over the field.
"Does it get better?" I asked.
"It does. Now you and Ms. Swan are lucky. She may be in a coma but it's better than nothing. From what I have heard from your friends she is a very strong person. She will make it out of that coma. Now what you need to do is catch up on what you have missed this month and get your ass out on that field and help us with these upcoming games we have. I expect you to lead us the championship this is your senior year. Now bring this team to victory!" Coach said.
"Alright Coach. If you can make it through this then so can I. Just a warning I haven't worked out the pass month. I'm not so sure I can do this." I said doubting myself, feeling uncertain.
"Well your ass better get back into shape and quick! Now go suit up we have practice." he said
I got up and started walking before. I stopped and looked back at him.
"Thanks Coach. It's nice to know that I can talk to somebody who can understand." I said
"It's nothing kid. I need my damn quarterback back on this field winning us games. Ever since you have been with Ms. Swan we sure have been winning these a hell of a lot more than usual. Keep it up." He said
The moment walked back into the locker room I felt at home. Once the guys saw me they went quite and looked at me.
"You finally coming back to lead us to victory, McCarty?" Sam yelled.
"Why else would I be here? Let you guys try and do that all on your own, I'm not sure if we would make it to the championship then. Look guys I'm sorry for not being here the past month and I plan on making it up by taking us to the championship. Put now let's get our gear on and practice so we can win this!" I said, getting excited to be back on the team.
"Hey! There's the McCarty we know! Now welcome back to family!" Edward yelled.
All the guys kept coming up and patting me on the shoulder. All us football players were nothing but one big family, no matter how much we got on each other's nerves.
I drove straight to the hospital once football practice was over. The day was going alright all I had to do was go and see Bella before I went home. I parked my Jeep and walked to Bella's room.
I walked in and saw Carlisle checking over Bella.
"Hey Carlisle. How's Bella doing today?" I asked after I kissed her head like I always do.
"There's a slight change, nothing major. But her brain is showing more activity then before and she can now hear us talking to her as opposed to when it was only silence she could hear." He said smiling.
"That's defiantly good right? She could be waking up soon?" I asked getting excited already.
"Yes Emmett it's possible that she could be waking up soon in the next possible week or month." He said looking down at Bella. "I'll leave you guys so you can talk to her." And with that he walked out the room.
"Oh Bella, honey. You need to wake up. We all miss you. It's been a month since you were put into a coma. I went back to school today. It was weird without you being there with me by my side, or seeing you at lunch. Coach understands what we are going through babe, well and the fact that he told me to go and get my ass on the field to practice. But other than that I plan on taking the team to the championships and I want you there to cheer us on, so I have a real reason for winning this game and it's going to be because of you and nobody else. Oh babe I miss you so much!" I grabbed her hand.
"I thought I could go the whole day at school without you, but I admit I did ditch sixth period after seeing where it all happened. That's when everything kind of broke down. Bella I'm begging you, please wake up. Show me that you can hear me, something Bella please. Carlisle still thinks its his fault that you are here and it's not, it's mine. It is my fault that you got shot. You shouldn't have jumped in front of me. I should be the one laying on this hospital bed. Bella please wake up. Squeeze my hand or something. Baby please, I want you here. Esme can't stop crying because you are not at home helping her or whatever it is you guys do together."
I could feel the tears streaming down my face. I put my head on the bed right next to her arm, never letting go of her hand. I heard the door open, I looked up and saw Carlisle looking slightly worried, startled.
"Emmett have you just been talking to her right?" he asked.
"Yes nothing else well and some crying obviously." I said gesturing my eyes.
"Emmett her brain activity is even more since you started talking to her."
"And that means?" I asked anxious for his answer, feeling butterflies in my stomach, that uneasy feel.
"It means she's fighting to wake up. Her body is already healed it's just the matter of fact of her waking up. She's going to wake up soon. I just know it." He said checking over everything.