Chapter 1

Reba Hart sat alone in the counseling office again, alone. Brock was late, way late, forty five minutes late. Reba couldn't stand this anymore. She had been coming here trying to work on her marriage for a long time now. The kids were tired of going from house to house and Reba was tired of Brock acting like a child. If he was going through a midlife crisis he should just find some new young wife and divorce her like she knows he wants to. She was tired of everything.

If he wanted out he should just tell her instead of stringing her along like he was because she couldn't take it anymore. She had tried so hard to be brave during this time but she couldn't do it all on her own. She had been taking anti-depressants for almost six months now. She had explained everything to her doctor before he had given them to her. How she didn't want to get out of bed. She didn't eat anymore. She looks frail and tired all the time. She once broke a glass while doing the dishes. When she picked up the glass she just couldn't help but notice how nice and sharp the edges looked. How sweet the end for her would be. Just one cut across each wrist and she could have ended it. The kids would still have their father and they would soon forget all about their depressed and stupid mother.

That was when she knew she needed help. She now thinks about how stupid she was to even think of killing herself. Her kids needed her and she thought Brock would need her the way she needs him but it looks like he was doing perfectly fine on his own. He didn't need her anymore. She felt he didn't love her anymore. She knew he didn't but she sure loved him and she hated herself for it. For letting herself go on the way she did, trying to save a marriage that isn't worth saving.

Reba looked at her watch again; even if Brock had walked right through the door then they would only have five minutes left for their session. Reba grabbed her purse and left the office. The secretary outside the door looked at her with sympathy. Reba didn't even bother to make another appointment with her. She walked straight to elevator, to the car, and then drove to her house.

Reba slammed the door once inside. This was the last straw. No more. She couldn't do this. For her sanity and the kid's sake she had to break this off. They couldn't go on like this anymore. Her daughter Cheyenne was in the living room with her other two kids Kyra and Jake. She looked on as they watched TV together and laughed. It was the first time she actually seen them do that. She smiled and walked into the living room.

Cheyenne looked up and smiled as she saw her mother walk in. "Hey mom. How did it go?" she asked with a little hesitation. Cheyenne knew it was a sensitive subject.

Reba frowned and shrugged. "Like it usually does, I sat there waiting like a fool."

Cheyenne smile at her mother in sympathy. "Want me to make dinner?" she asked trying to help her mother out in some way.

Reba shook her head. "No thanks Cheyenne and no offense darlin' but you can't cook." She said with a small chuckle. "How about we just order pizza tonight?"

"All right!" yelled little Jake as he ran upstairs to play. Kyra as sullen as ever lately just nodded and followed Jake up the stairs to go to her room.

"I'll call." Cheyenne said picking up the phone. "Green peppers?" Reba smiled and nodded. Green peppers were her favorite pizza topping. (I don't really know her favorite pizza topping, I just put mine down.) "Twenty minutes." Cheyenne said two minutes later when she hung up the phone. "I'll be upstairs on the phone with Van."

Reba nodded and flopped down on the couch, staring at the cartoon that was on TV. She didn't hear the back door open or Brock slowly walk through the kitchen and into the living room.

Brock watched his wife sitting on the couch. She looked so sad. He missed her so much. He wanted to come home but she didn't want him or need him there. His heart ached for her and he just wanted to hug her and kiss her and tell her he was sorry. He loved her so much. He didn't understand where everything went wrong. He continued to watch and it killed him when he saw the small tear roll down her cheek. He must have made a noise because she looked up suddenly.

She looked at him with a look of anger. "You're a little late."

He was confused. "What?"

Reba rolled her eyes. He was going to play the 'I forgot' thing. "The counseling session with had today with Doctor Baker."

Brock cringed. He thought that was tomorrow. He walked over to sit next to her but Reba just got up and left to the kitchen. "I thought it was tomorrow. Honest to God."

Reba scoffed and took a water bottle from the refrigerator. "Yeah right, you can go home now."

The pain around his heart tightened when he heard those words. He didn't want to leave. He wanted to put that off as long as possible. "When's our next appointment?"

She turned to him. "I didn't make one. I figured it was pointless."

Brock was taken aback. "What? Those sessions are supposed to help us."

Reba threw her hands in the air. "Help what? You never show up Brock! I just sit there like a fool while you're out doing God only knows who."

He gave her a look of shock. She thought he was cheating on her. "What are you talking about?"

Reba set down her water and calmed herself a bit, not wanting to have to yell and have the kids here them fighting again. "Unlike you Brock I take my marriage vows seriously. If you don't want to be in this marriage just say so. I don't want to go on like this anymore. I am tired and I need to move on from this marriage that isn't going anywhere and isn't worth saving." Tears were starting to form in her eyes and she turned away.

Brock sucked in his breath as she had said those words. She wanted a divorce. She didn't want him anymore. His worst nightmare has come true. His wife didn't love him. "Reba…is that what you truly want?"

Reba didn't answer. No, of course it isn't what she wanted but it's what she needed. She looked to the clock, her eyes widened; she had to take her pills. "Reba?" she heard Brock say. She turned to him. "I need an answer. Is that what you truly want?"

Reba still didn't say anything. She just let the tear fall. "I want you to just go. I have things to do." Reba grabbed her water and walked upstairs to her room. She didn't notice Brock follow her and she still didn't notice as he stood behind her while she searched in the side table for her pills.

Brock was very confused when he saw her dig through her table drawer. He was shocked to say the least when he saw her bring out a bottle of pills, take one from the plastic container, and then swallow it with help from her water. He knew it wasn't aspirin. It was a prescription looking bottle. "What are you taking?"

Reba turned sharply and shoved the bottle back into her drawer. "Get out of my room. How dare you come in here without my permission!"

Brock ignored her and crossed the room to where she stood. "What were you taking?"

Reba didn't want him to know. She didn't want sympathy from him. "None of your business, now just leave. I'm taking a bath." She went for her closet and once she moved out of the way Brock lunged forward and opened the drawer to retrieve the bottle. He was shocked when he read exactly what they were.

Reba didn't even have time to react or stop him before he saw them. She just stood there waiting for a reaction, any reaction.

Brock turned to her with the pills in his eyes. "What are these?"

Reba looked at him and gave him an 'Are you that dumb look?' "What do you think?"

She was depressed and he had caused it. He didn't like this. He didn't like not knowing what was going on with his wife. He didn't like not being able to be there and comfort her when she needed it. "Why didn't you tell me?"

Reba waved him off and removed the jacket she was wearing. "It's none of your business. Now go so I can change and take a bath. I am tired. I need to relax."

Brock didn't budge. He moved in front of her and had a serious look on her face. "It is my business you are my wife!"

Reba was angry. How dare he! "It's funny you say wife because you sure don't treat me like your wife!"

Brock threw his arms in the air. "This is our main problem Reba. You never tell me how you feel! You always blame me for everything. You never really talk to me. I don't know what to do anymore!"

"What do you want me to do?" Reba yelled back. She was tired of this game. She was tired of all the fighting. Every time they were together they always fought. This had to change.

"Tell me how you feel. Don't just sit there and tell me it's my entire fault like you do in therapy. Just tell me!"

"All right!" she said. "You want to know how I feel, fine! I hate it that you left ok! You left me all alone to take care of the kids. They need you! You need to be here with your kids!"

Brock shook his head. "I left because you told me to!"

Reba started to cry. "I didn't mean it ok! I wanted you to stay. They need you here."

"What about you?" Brock asked. She had told him the kids needed him but what about her.


Brock gave her a look in disbelief. "Why can't you just say it? I can. I love you Reba! I want to come home!"

Reba's heart swelled with love as she heard those words. She wanted him back so much but she was afraid. "Brock, I…"

"Forget it." He said walking towards the door.

Reba stopped him with her words. "Brock, don't leave. I love you."

Brock turned around. "What?"

Reba nodded and stepped towards him. "I love you and I want you to come home but I don't want things to go back to the way things were. I don't want to fight anymore. I am just so tired of the fighting."

Brock smiled and pulled Reba into the tightest hug he could give. He didn't want to let her go. "Things will be different. We can work this out. We will still go to the sessions and I will come everyday. We can make this work honey. I promise you this time is different. I love you."

Reba wrapped her arms around him and hugged him just as tight. It's been so long since she felt this secure in his arms. She looked up to him and kissed him for the first time in several months. They both fell back onto the bed and their love was consumed by each other.

Cheyenne had taken Kyra and Jake downstairs when she heard her father and mother yelling at each other again. They were all very happy when they heard their father saying he loved their mother and wanted to come home. Cheyenne was starting to get a little concerned when she heard nothing. "I wonder if their ok." She said to her sister.

Kyra shrugged but then she heard something that made her think they were just fine. "Their perfectly ok now." She said with a grossed out look on her face.

"What?" Cheyenne asked with a confused look on her face.

Kyra just shook her head. "Listen." She said.

Cheyenne strained to listen and then her face began disgusted when she heard squeaking of a bed coming from upstairs. "Let's go."

"What's that?" little Jake asked.

"Nothing." Cheyenne said shaking her head. She quickly dragged her sister and brother towards the door to find the pizza guy. Cheyenne quickly threw money at him and grabbed the pizza from him. The kids felt much better when they ate their pizza outside, away from their gross parents.

An hour later the couple was still upstairs, with their arms wrapped around each other. Brock kept a firm grip on her and would not let her go. He kissed her bare shoulder and neck causing her to giggle. "It's good to hear you laugh again…and scream." He said with a smirk.

Reba rolled her eyes in a playful manner. "I love you Brock." She said planting a kiss on his lips. She didn't even give him a chance to say it back. "We need a song." She said.

"What?" he asked laughing. Reba sat up, wrapping the blanket the sheet around her. She reached over Brock, her chest now pressed to his, to the side table where the radio was. "I wouldn't do that." He said caressing her back. Reba rolled her eyes and moved so she was now straddling him and trying to mess with the radio. "That's not a good thing to do either."

Reba wiggled a bit and caused Brock to groan. She smirked and continued to ignore him. She turned on the radio to a station and Like a Virgin by Madonna came on. She laughed out loud. "I don't think that's song is really appropriate."

Brock smiled. "Why do we need a song anyway?"

"It's to celebrate our new start. Every time you hear the song, you will think of me and of this moment." Brock rolled his eyes and Reba stuck her tongue out at him. Suddenly a song made her stop.

What you got if you ain't got love?
The kind that you just wanna give away
It's okay to open up
Go ahead and let the light shine through
I know it's hard on a rainy day
You wanna shut the world out
And just be left alone
Don't run out on your dreams

Sometimes that mountain you've been climbing
Is just a grain of sand
What you've been out there searching for forever,
Is in your hands
When you figure out love is all that matters, after all
It sure makes everything else
Seem so small

Reba set the radio down as they continued to listen to the song. It was so perfect for them. They were always worrying about the little things that used to make them both crazy.

So easy to get lost inside
A problem that seems so big, at the time
It's like a river that's so wide
And swallows you whole
While you sittin round thinking about what you can't change
And worryin' about all the wrong things
Time's flying by, moving so fast
Better make it count, cause you can't get it back

Sometimes that mountain you've been climbing
Is just a grain of sand
What you've been out there searchin for forever
Is in your hands
Oh, When you figure out love is all that matters after all
It sure makes everything else
Seem so small

Sometimes that mountain you've been climbing
Is just a grain of sand
What you've been out there searchin for forever
Is in your hands
Oh, When you figure out love is all that matters after all
It sure makes everything else
Oh it sure makes everything else
Seem so small

After the song was over Reba reached over and turned off the radio. Brock smiled up at her and new exactly what she was thinking. "It's perfect." They both said at the same time.

It caused them both to laugh. She wiggled down a bit, trying to situate herself. Brock closed his eyes. He really wished she wouldn't do that. "I told you not to do that." Reba didn't even realize she did it again but she smirked and wiggled once more. The next thing she knew Brock flipped her over, holding her hands above her head, pinning her down. "I told you to stop. Now you have to be punished."

Reba smiled. "Go ahead."

He smirked and captured her lips in a passionate kiss. He only broke the kiss to look deeply into her eyes. "I love you."

He let go of her hands and she pulled him close, caressing his cheek. "I love you too." They would work it out, they loved each other and that's all that mattered.

The End