Just a One-Shot I thought I'd try. I know I'm in the middle of Reflecting Light but inspiration caught me.
I just updated Reflecting Light, so have a looksy? :)
This is set at the end of "The Real Paul Anka" - how it should have gone!
Read and Review? Thank you!
She stepped out the door and let the breath she'd been holding out. The wind made her hair whip around her face and neck. The air was warm, but she felt freezing. She looked up to the sky and pressed her back against the door. 'Just one more time one of us is running' she thought. Running her hands down her jacket, she pulled the last button and pushed it through, hoping to warm up her insides. It's always how she feels when she lies or does something wrong. She overlapped her arms, hugging herself and looked down to the parking lot. There sat her car. She knew she should go get in it and drive back to Logan's apartment but she felt like walking.
Before she knew what was happening, her feet were carrying her in a direction – any direction away from the publishing house she'd just had her back pressed against. When she went to cross the first street she was irritated to find it still this busy at night and out of her frustration her vision became blurred and walking more sloppy. She felt drunk so when she got to the other side, she leaned up against the dark brick building. Bringing her hands to her face is when she finally realized what was wrong – she was crying, sobbing actually.
Half bent over she let the tears come, she could practically feel her insides shaking as she let out sob after sob. Sinking down onto her butt she leaned her head back against the cool brick and looked out to the night lights of Philadelphia. If she wasn't so hysterical, she'd probably enjoy the view. The warm tears flowed silently down the sides of her head now, some to her ears, some getting caught in her hair.
Unaware of how much time she sat there, she stood up when the tears stopped and as they dried the wind cooled her face down and her skin tightened. She wiped her cheeks with shaky hands and stood there for a few minutes, letting the feel of the city reach her heart and mind. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath before her ears registered the sounds of 'Fools Gold'. She could hear the guitar and drums, and the voice was a little too soft.
Subconsciously she decided to find the source of the music and found herself standing outside another red brick building looking in. A live band could be seen in the back of the place, playing covers of Stone Roses. The next thing she knew she was seated at the bar and the bartender placed a drink in front of her. She picked it up and took a sip – a cosmopolitan. Huh, she didn't remember ordering.
"Drowning your sorrows, miss?" the voice came from over her left shoulder and she closed her eyes and turned away from the band and to her left.
"Hardly. There's not enough alcohol here, and I'm only on my first drink."
"Well, finish up and we'll get you started on the second."
"What can I get you?" The bartender interrupted, throwing a white towel onto his shoulder.
"Beer's fine. Whatever you got on tap."
The bartender nodded his head and walked off.
"What're you doing here, Jess?" Rory asked, looking at him.
"Well I live in this city and come here at least a couple times a month with Chris and Matt. However, you're an out-of-towner, so I should be asking you that."
"Well, see, I came to an open house of a friend of mine's tonight. He's actually an old flame. I don't even know why I came – probably because I'm proud and I really wanted to see his place. But it probably wasn't right of me to come."
"No ulterior motives?"
"Nope. He doesn't know that though."
He paused for a moment and nodded at the bartender as his beer was placed in front of him. He lifted the cold glass up to his lips, only taking in a small sip before setting it back down.
He started quietly, "Why did you lie?"
Rory contemplated her answer for a moment, took a sip of her drink and answered, "I don't know." Then she turned in her chair to watch the band. After a few minutes she heard him speak over her shoulder again,
"They're pretty decent. They always cover stuff you'd like. The stuff they write isn't so bad either."
She turned back, "What's their name?"
"Cheesy," She said, lifting her glass again.
"Yeah, but the music's worth the cheese."
"Sounds like it," she nodded.
He waited and tried to say something a couple times before he found the words and voiced them, "You're really in love with him?"
"Jess… please… just, don't."
"Just answer the question."
She rolled her eyes and finished off her drink before flagging down the bartender and asking for another. Her lips stayed pursed until he came back with her drink. This time she took it from his hand and took a gulp before setting it down.
"He slept with his sister's entire wedding party."
His sarcasm couldn't hold back, "Even the guys? Because if so, I didn't know you were into that."
"Jess, damnit." She spun her chair back towards the band.
He sighed and grabbed her chair, turning it back towards him, more fully this time, so he could see her whole face.
"It's fine." She reached with her right arm and grabbed her drink. He watched her take another gulp before he let go of her chair and reached for his beer, taking a swig.
"Why'd you take him back?"
"Logan's… comfortable and steady, very persistent. Yes, he can be an arrogant ass and he's not a fantastic boyfriend, but he's good enough."
"Good enough." He repeated the words, toying with them.
"Well, he's no Jess I mean." She could have spit in his face and that would have been better than the words. She finished off the rest of her glass.
"You know, you aren't exactly on my A-list right now either."
He took another gulp of his beer and turned away from him.
She sighed and looked up at him, "I'm sorry"
"For what?" he asked with a heavy voice, not even bothering to look at her.
"For what happened back there – I should have just left it alone."
"Because Logan's 'good enough', right?" He scoffed, and shook his head.
She hastily grabbed her purse off the stool next to hers and pulled out some money, throwing it on the counter and half ran out of the bar.
He huffed out some air before reaching in his pocket and doing the same.
"Rory! Wait!" He half yelled, coming out of the bar.
"Oh! Damnit Jess, let me leave!"
He caught up to her and grabbed her wrist, pulling her around to face him. The tears were already streaming down her face and it caught him off guard, he had to think what to say.
She jerked her arm back, "Great, that will make me stay" she laughed humorlessly and rolled her eyes again.
"Rory, what are you waiting for?"
"What the hell are you waiting for? For him to hurt you more than he already has?"
"God Jess! I'm waiting for us to stop running away from each other!" she yelled, her voice breaking at the end.
"You're the one who's running this time."
"I have a boyfriend, Jess."
"Yeah? One who treats you like dirt, doesn't get along with your mom, and doesn't care what you do?"
"Well the first two don't sound to unfamiliar." She spat.
"Great, let's dig up stuff that happened years ago" he said, rolling his head around.
"I'm waiting for the moment when this is going to be right, for when everything comes to a standstill and we are the one's moving in the right direction… with each other." She said quietly, soundless sobs escaping her.
"Look around Rory! The moment's here. Everything's in order and you're running away – God knows why."
"I told you, I have a boyfriend. Obviously this isn't the moment." She said her voice getting higher again.
"The moment is here Rory. So what are you gonna do about it?" He said, exasperated.
She then took his advice and looked around. What happened to all the cars? Couldn't one drive by so she could fling herself in front of it? She listened, and there were no horns honking and the band wasn't playing anymore – no voices could be heard. Couldn't there be someone to get her out of this? She looked around desperately, eyes darting everywhere to find something and the only thing she could find was right in front of here.
"What are you gonna do?" He repeated.
She stared at him for a couple seconds, their eyes meeting and the war turned internal. She could see it all – the love, pain, desperation, honesty, and growth.
Before she could stop it, she flung herself into his arms and both of their eyes closed as their lips met. After he recovered from the initial shock, he put his arms around her and pulled her closer, their lips moving in sync with each other's. Her arms were clasped tightly around his neck and they stayed like that for a few minutes. They just kissed, re-familiarizing each other. He could taste the salty tears that meshed between their mouths that had escaped from her eyes. After the kiss calmed down he broke it off and kissed her three times lightly before pulling away from her.
Her eyes stayed closed a little longer than his and he watched as she opened them. Her eyes clear she looked up at his and asked,
"Was that the right thing to do with the moment?" her voice was quiet and thick.
"Was it?" He questioned her, hope flooding his eyes.
She stared at him and then answered, "Yeah, I'm sure." She smiled a small smile and nodded her head until their lips met again.