Sorry this took so long. It takes a while to think up lyrics and make sure they fit with the tempo of the song (contrary to popular opinion). Anyway, read and enjoy!

Disclaimer: Lord of the Rings isn't mine, neither is this song. The only thing that is mine are these words.

Don't Trust Him

Parody of "Don't Trust Me" by 3Oh3!

Green shirt, with brown cloak over all

I got my mail shirt and axe from my father's hall

And he's a princeling (princeling)

Son of King Thranduil

A leader of the elves who imprisoned my people

R-r-r-rings, especially this One

Cause all sorts of trouble and force us to come together

However, I refuse to work with him

Legolas is stupid and he looks too girly-girl

I am asked to go (Woah)

On a trip with Frodo (Woah)

With stupid Lego (Woah, woah, oh, oh)

Don't trust an elf

Never trust an elf

Won't trust an elf

'Cause I know I don't trust him

Hairy are the backs of his hands

With a grip to rival the rangers of these lands

And his armor (armor)

He had it hand-made

Got it fitted right down to his Halfling-sized height

Sp-sp-sp-splotches cover his cheeks

Showing anger and hatred that's been bottled up for weeks

And the worst is (worst is)

I know what next comes

A trip to the one and only Mount Doom

I am asked to leave (Woah)

To destroy the One Ring (Woah)

With stupid Gimli (Woah, woah, oh, oh)

Don't trust a dwarf

Never trust a dwarf

Won't trust a dwarf

'Cause I know I don't trust him


Shush, elf, shut your cork.

Take your bow and arrows and go shoot some Orcs."

I said, "Shush, dwarf, shut your cork.

Take up your axe, and decapitate those Orcs."

We said," Shut up, shuttin' our corks.

We workin' together to defeat those Orcs

We are gonna go (Woah)

On a trip with Frodo (Woah)

And argue no more (Woah, woah, oh, oh)

Don't trust Sauron

Never trust Sauron

Won't trust Sauron

'Cause we know we both don't trust him