Unintentionally Flawed

Part 1

A Skulduggery Pleasant Fan-Fic

This new fetish of Jack's… it was odd and certainly not something he had desired before. Though still, it seemed to grow on him immensely, especially these last few days it seemed. Just about the time he had once again escaped from prison. He had grown an awful need for this highly cherishable, metallic substance, and it was driving him into spirals.

He stood over his latest kill, an elderly man out on a midnight stroll, just an average Irish civilian. Pointless it seemed, unnecessary, and somewhat foolish; a bit on the desperate side as people would think. But he had a reason for this unrational death.

A medallion made entirely of this wonderful metal he held in his hands, once wrapped and cased for its delicacy and fine stature. The old man had held it dear to him till the end. Not that his end wasn't swift… and somehow brutally painful. But whoever he adored and loved enough to want to give such fine jewelry to, will not see of it or him again; alive that is. Oh what a shame. On Jack's part? Yeah… not really.

Springheeled Jack let his pride show though his disgusting grin as he eyed his new prize. Then after kicking the bloody body aside he strode off into the night to seek more of what his heart desired most at the time. And for that he would kill, if he hadn't already.


Valkyrie was completely thrilled to have Skulduggery back by her side. She felt alive again. It gave her the feeling of being whole.

Skulduggery also seemed much happier compared to the depressed state he was in when he had been trapped inside the Faceless Ones Realm. He was himself again. And she was glad.

Valkyrie was, for once, taking a break. She sat snuggled next to her new boyfriend, Fletcher, while watching one of those old kid movies. She didn't much like sitting around doing nothing, but it was relaxing and that felt good. Skulduggery on the other hand had actually advised her to take a break and chill with Fletcher. He had some things to do. Nothing important.

Valkyrie closed her eyes as Fletcher rubbed her arm, and just as she felt the gravity of sleep start to creep into her mind and over come her, her mobile phone rang. She moaned and dug the cell out of her baggy jean pocket. The screen read 'Knight in Shining Leather', her contact name for Tanith. Tanith had disapproved of this, but Skulduggery loved it, so she kept it.

Valkyrie pressed the green button and yawned hello into the receiver.

"Hey Val! Sorry, am I interrupting you? Where you in the middle of…. A little heaven?" She heard Tanith snicker mockingly. Tanith was the only one really to approve of Valkyrie being with Fletcher. In fact she LOVED the fact that she had taken Fletcher off her hands. He scared her. She wanted nothing to do with him. And so she loved Valkyrie for loving him. But she still loved to tease Valkyrie about it. It was what older sisters do. And Valkyrie better know that, because she would be one in less than a year.

"No," Valkyrie scoffed with a hint of that voice that said 'Oh, how did you know?'"

Tanith tried to stifle a laugh as she continued, "Well then, I guess you're free to watch The Grudge. Maybe have some coco while we're at it."

Valkyrie frowned, stood up, and began drifting away to her kitchen, leaving Fletcher and his 'cleaver' comments behind, "The Grudge? Tanith it's Christmas season."

"It's barely December!" Tanith snorted.

"I'm already watching a movie with Fletch anyway."

"Ohhhhhhh, so you ARE making out."


"Fine then, I'll kidnap you in the middle of the night instead."

"It is the middle of the night, and good luck pulling that off."

"I'll have Skul do it for me."


Tanith laughed again, "Okay, I'll leave you to you're alone time with you're boyfriend."

Valkyrie hung up as she tossed a popcorn bag into the microwave.

Fletcher's head popped out from around the kitchen entrance, "So who was that?"

Valkyrie smiled and shook her head, "Just a crazy lunatic who's after your family jewels."

Fletcher froze, put a hand to his crotch, and slowly disappeared. Valkyrie laughed and turned her attention back to the food before it burnt AGAIN.

Her phone rang. Valkyrie sighed in exasperation and answered, "I told you Tanith, I'm not watching The Grudge with you. And you can't make Skulduggery…"

"Make me do what?" Came that clear velvety voice.

Valkyrie paused, "Oh…"

Skulduggery chuckled in amusement.

"So… what do you want?"

It was silent for a moment, "We have a case. There has been a murder tonight. They want use to check it out."

Valkyrie frowned. She kind of needed this break, but why object? "Alright pick me up at the dock."

"Already here."

Valkyrie hung up and wondered back into the living room. She found Fletcher standing at the front door with a grim expression. "Hey I think someone's here to see you."

There was a dark figure wavering around in the door window. She quickly passed the couch and put her hand on the door knob. She waited a second then swung the door open.

Fletcher stared wide eyed at the empty street. "I swear to God he was there a moment ago…"


Fletcher jumped and teleported to the opposite street outside the house. Valkyire spun on her heel to find a skeleton standing on her staircase.

"You didn't think I'd actually use the door did you?"

Valkyrie stared at him, mouth gapped.

"Shut that girl. You're going to catch a fly."

Valkyrie felt the urge to punch him. "What the bloody hell Skulduggery!"

Skulduggery put a gloved finger to his new and improved teeth, "Shh, you'll wake your parents."

"What if they see you!"

"Exactly way you need to hurry."

Valkyrie let her head drop and sighed loudly to let him know she was frustrated. Skulduggery chuckled and moved aside as she trotted up the stares to change her cloths.

Once she had finished and slipped on her necromancer ring, she slipped back down the stares to be greeted by a foul smell and an equally disgusted Fletcher.

Valkyrie crinkled her nose and frowned, "I can't believe I burnt the popcorn AGAIN!"