Ted opened his door. "Hell no."
Robin shrugged and pushed him aside. "You invited me. I didn't even want to come. So Barney is my plus one."
"You didn't get a plus one."
"I cad leave." Robin grabbed Barney's arm and dragged him into the apartment, pushing him so he fell into the couch.
"No, you can't." Robin turned to address Ted. "You're my friend, but Barney is my friend too. So if you're really going to be so selfish that you'll make me sit through a stupid teddy bear movie while my friend suffers alone, you're not a very good person.
"I'm not selfish," Ted said.
At the same time, Barney added "stop callig it the teddy bear bovie."
"Yeah Robin, don't take your frustration over Ted out on Ewoks. They are fuzzy, loveable creatures that have done nothing to harm you. Yet. They can take down an entire storm trooper if they want."
Lily leaned toward Robin and whispered, "he is so not getting lucky tonight."
Robin sat down next to Barney. "We're about to watch two movies about ewoks. I think we can safely say this is as unlucky as any of us are going to be."
Lily nodded, but the three men glared at her. "HAHK'Chsh!"
"Bless you!" everyone chorused.
Barney raised his eyebrows, confused, in Ted's generation. "Thadks."
Ted nodded awkwardly. "Sure. Do you, uh, want some tea or something?"
Barney shook his head. "I'b fide." He shifted slightly on the couch, trying in vain to get comfortable. He leaned closer to Robin, who patted him on the leg subconsciously.
Everyone pretended not to notice.
Marshall popped the first DVD into the player as Lily settled onto the couch on Robin's other side, and Ted sat on the chair.
As the opening credits rolled, Marshall sat down on the floor in front of Lily and leaned against her legs.
Lily was the first to fall asleep, using Marshall's Ewok doll as a pillow, and though Marshall shook her awake every time she dozed off, he eventually gave up and just let her sleep/
Robin was next, curled up against Barney who turned his head in an attempt to keep from breathing on her.
Ted looked up. "I guess this isn't there type of movie, huh?"
"Doesd't look like it," Barney agreed, blinking lethargically.
"Are you going to fall asleep too?"
"Go ahead," Marshall urged, "you're sick, it's cool."
"I'b dot sick," Barney argued. "Just ti-Eksch'Hfft!-red."
Robin stirred. "Bless you."
Barney winced. "Sorry. I did't bead to wake you."
"It's cool." She yawned and rubbed her eyes. When she had cleared the sleep from them, she had a clearer view of Barney. "Oy, you look even more awful. I'll get you something to drink."
She was stopped by a hand on her leg. "Stay?"
Robin shrugged. "Suit yourself." Stretched out her arms, feeling squished between her sleeping best friend and her…Barney.
Ted stood up and disappeared into the kitchen, coming back with three beers and a water bottle.
"Thanks," Robin said, giving Ted an approving smile as she popped open her beer and twisted the top off Barney's water bottle for him.
Ted responded by tossing his Ewok doll to Barney so he could join Lily in dreamland. He made a nonchalant hand motion. "I guess Ewok night brings out the best in me," he muttered.
"Ewoks, good beer, and good friends," Marshall agreed. "What more could you want?"
Ted smiled, taking a long sip from his own bottle, and settled himself deeper into the chair.