Hey, everyone! This is a songfic based on Her Bucket List by me. The whole bucket list story was actually based on this song because I went days listening to only this song and All the Same by Sick Puppies.
Zach: I'll warn you, this is sad.
Abby: If Zach says it's sad... then it probably isn't.
Zach: Hey!
Abby: Well, that's just the usual case. He is most likely correct. It's sad, but I think it's alright.

Disclaimer: I do not own Max, Fang, Iggy, Ella or My Chemical Romance!


Cancer

Fang was standing over me, a sad smile on his tired face. He had a guarded look on his face and an invisible dam in his eyes; it was going to break. I was dying and he still couldn't grasp the subject. I suppose I couldn't either, but I was basically all he had left. And I loved him. I didn't want to leave him, but what choice do you have when you've been sitting on your death bed for years? I grabbed his hand slowly, careful not to waste what little energy I still had.

Turn away,
If you could get me a drink
Of water 'cause my lips are chapped and faded.

My best friend got up from the side of my hospital bed and returned with a small cup, half way filled with room temperature water. I graciously sipped the liquid, trying not to spill with my shaking hands.

Call my aunt Marie
Help her gather all my things
And bury me in all my favorite colors.

I didn't want any black at my funeral. No one should be celebrating my death, per say, but I didn't want any mourning. I was off to a better place; I could be happy and healthy all at the same time.

My sisters and my brothers, still,
I will not kiss you,
'Cause the hardest part of this is leaving you.

Lately I couldn't even look at Ella and Iggy. They always looked so sad when they layed their eyes upon my sick, frail body. My skin was pale and cold all the time and they were constantly crying when they thought I didn't know. Leaving them wasn't something I could easily do.

Now turn away,
'Cause I'm awful just to see
'Cause all my hairs abandoned all my body,
Oh, my agony.

How Fang could sit so close to me and not want to vomit at the sight of me, I couldn't understand. I was disgusting. Like I was in the fifth grade, I was still ugly. Hairless and tired, with dark circles beneath my lifeless, colorless eyes. I hated being this way around him when he looked so healthy and beautiful. Well, he hadn't slept in days, but he was still the guy I would marry if I lived long enough.

Know that I will never marry,
Baby, I'm just soggy from the chemo
But counting down the days to go
It just ain't living.

I had a day or two left. Then I knew that God was going to take me. But please; please tell me just how I'm supposed to go on like this? How are you supposed to feel knowing that you're leaving all of the people you love behind? How does He expect me to be happy in heaven if I'm leaving my friends and family miserable down here. Why does this have to happen like this?

And I just hope you know
That if you say
Goodbye today
I'd ask you to be true.

I had considered telling Fang off; telling him to just leave now before things got any worse... Not that there was much worse of a state than this other than dead. But no. He'd gone this far with me and I couldn't do that to him. He helped me finish most of my bucket list and that meant the world to me. But I was hurting him... I was killing him. That made dying even worse. I repeat the question always: why?

'Cause the hardest part of this is leaving you;
'Cause the hardest part of this is leaving you.

I gently closed my eyes, praying to the God I hoped was up there that I could make it one more day. One day to apologize, one day to hug them and one day to tell them how I feel.

I'll miss you.

Zach: SO. FREAKING. SAD. YOU. DERANGED. WOMAN.
Abby: Just let him calm down. He'll get over it.
Zach: BUT IT'S JUST TERRIBLE.
Abby: Zach, you're going to have to face it; death is a part of life. No, Max doesn't die in this, because why would I give away the ending if I haven't even shown our fans the actual bucket list...
Zach: Fine. Be logical.
Abby: -smirks- Review, please! I quite enjoy this story actually... That sounds so masochistic.

Love and Lambs,
~Abby