No Escape: Chapter 1
by Creedog VanDrey

Category: Glee
Genre: Mystery
Rating: T
Language: English
Summary: There's a murderer at McKinley High. No one knows who. No one knows why. No one knows if they'll survive.
Spoilers: Through Episode 1x13: "Sectionals"

A/N: So, a little about my process in writing this story. I really wanted to write a murder mystery in the vein of And Then There Were None by Agatha Christie (also known by several other, politically incorrect names). But since all these characters are near and dear to my heart, I couldn't face deciding who I would kill. So, I let fate decide and chose characters from a hat. One will die in each chapter. Mourn the deaths of your favorite characters and try to guess the identity of the killer.


Chapter 1: What You Deserve

The first thing Will Schuester did every time he walked into glee practice was to count heads. For the past month, he'd been counting to twelve (technically the count would decrease to eleven at least twice a month when a certain brunette singer stormed out in a pre-rehearsed rage), and he loved that number. It meant his team was eligible for competition. He'd of course prefer more, as the team hadn't really bonded yet and there was always the opportunity for a quitter.

Teenagers were creatures of habit. Unless the social hierarchy had shifted, everyone would be sitting in their implicitly designated seats. Rachel, was, of course front and center, her legs crossed and her hands delicately perched on the top knee, her face paying enough attention for three students. Finn sat beside her, looking quite like he'd prefer to be back a row. Artie was in his wheelchair on the floor on the left side of the room, the morbidly-dressed but happily-dispositioned Tina in a chair beside, almost on top of him.

Kurt and Mercedes sat side-by-side on the second row, directly behind Finn and Rachel, eagerly but patiently waiting while exchanging small talk, apparently concerning their clothes. To their left sat Quinn and Puck. Quinn leaned over toward Puck as if claiming her property. Puck sat openly, as if open for business. In the back sat Brittany with a characteristic smile and Santana with an uncharacteristic one, facing each other, absorbed in their shared world. Mike and Matt slouched in their chairs, not looking too enthusiastic, but with dutiful attentive stares toward the front of the room.

"So, unfortunately Brad is out sick today," Will announced, "so we'll be working with electronic accompaniment." He plopped a portable stereo on top of the piano. "Now, we're going to try out today with a new song. I believe that Tina has something picked out for us."

Tina walked to the front of the room with a stack of paper. "S-s-so we're gonna sing 'M-m-m-merman' by T-tori Amos." Without another word, she passed out sheet music for the song and plugged her iPod into the stereo.

Go to bed
The priests are dead
Now no one
Can call you bad
Go to bed
The priests are dead
Finally you're in Peppermint Land

He's a merman
He doesn't need your voice
He's a merman

Minus Rachel's attempt to take lead on the second verse, the song went without a hitch. It was a pretty song, though the response from the club was lukewarm.

"I-I don't mind Rachel taking lead, Mr. Schuester."

"It's your song, Tina. But if you'd like, Rachel can sing the second verse. Or Quinn," he added, getting the blonde's attention, "your voice is well suited to the song." Quinn just gave him a noncommittal smile.

"Okay," Will remarked, "we'll keep working on that. Okay, everyone hop up. I want a refresher on 'Somebody to Love'." The choir assembled on the ground.

Will placed a new CD in the player, but instead of music, a garbled voice dictated threateningly, "Hello, New Directions, I hope you're having a lovely day so far, because I have some bad news for you, one of you is going to die. No, no, don't get all excited, I assure you, this person deserves to die. I will be monitoring you closely to ensure my intended victim shuffles off that mortal coil. But I warn you, I have gone to great lengths to make sure that I have my vengeance, so I would advise you all to remain calm until I release you. Do not attempt to leave this room until then; it will be the last thing you do and I do not mind the collateral damage. Have a pleasant afternoon." At the end of the speech, the opening lines of "Somebody to Love" began to play, but Will shut off the player.

"Puck?" Will muttered.

"I wasn't me, Mr. Schue."

"I believe you," Will replied sincerely, "do you think it could have been one of your football buddies?"

"Not likely," Puck remarked, "Mike and I are the only ones on the team who know how to record on audio equipment."

Matt, Santana, and Brittany looked at Mike, who laconically explained, "I like to make dance mixes." He lock-popped his arms to demonstrate. Brittany smiled. Santana scowled. Matt just nodded.

"Okay, okay, it's a lame joke. That's enough excitement for today. Places." Will restarted the song.

After the first move, there was a loud crack. The glee members dove away from the middle of the room, where a small cloud of smoke was floating. Burnt bits of a chair lay in a line between the riser and the piano, and in the middle of them, Tina's body, bleeding from her back and her mouth.


A/N: Yeah, I don't waste time. These chapters are going to be pretty short. Feel free to speculate about future deaths and the identity of the killer.