"I don't want to!" I was sitting on my bed glaring furiously at my mother.
"You have to and that's final!" I clenched my jaw fighting against the tears that were threatening to fall.
"I'm not going to marry him! We're in the 21st century for crying out loud! People don't do that anymore!"
My mother –Renee– was forcing me to marry into the richest family in town; the Cullen'. I'm supposed to marry Edward Cullen. The thing is I don't know the guy…I've never even seen him. My family got really poor when my father–Charlie– left us not too long ago. I dropped out of school and started working with my friend Mike Newton at his supply store.
But I wasn't making enough money. Even with my brother and sister–twins– working we didn't make enough.
"Bella I don't want to fight over this," great, here come the waterworks, "We need the money sweetie. You should be happy they picked you. They chose you over Rosalie, can you believe it!"
My sister Rosalie was way prettier than me she looked like a goddess. As did my brother who looks like a god. I was the only plain looking one that didn't look the least bit attractive. I sighed loudly giving in. "Okay. I'll…do it."
It's the day of the wedding and I'm not really here, at least not mentally. I was in a bit of shock as they dressed me and talked to me. It was like I wasn't in control of my body. I couldn't make myself talk or move a lot. It was a miracle I made it down the aisle and repeated what I was supposed when the priest told me to.
I never looked at my new husbands face. I came back from my state of shock when we were in the limo alone. Thank goodness it was just a small simple wedding with family and friends. I was staring out the window of the limo trying to avoid seeing him as much as possible.
I didn't turn to him until he cleared his throat, "Isabel–"
"It's Bella." I interrupted him. It was dark in the limo so I still couldn't see his face. It didn't matter anyways, I don't love him and I never will. His voice sounded very angel like though.
"Bella then. You don't have to worry we have separate rooms. None of us wanted this so I won't make you…"
He trailed off probably because he was thinking he wouldn't make me sleep with him; which I definitely won't. "Thanks," I whispered. I was looking down at my hands that were fiddling with my wedding dress. I felt my stomach twist as we approached the gigantic house that was going to be my new home. I was gonna get lost in it, sooner or later.
"You don't have to worry about anyone else. It's just you and me and of course the workers here," I could feel his gaze on me as he spoke.
Could he see the terror I was feeling? Could he even see me in here? I shook my head lightly before staring out the window again. I could feel my heart rise from my chest and enter my throat. It feels like I'm going to puke my heart out. The limo stopped sending my heart into a sprint.
I was still looking out the window when I felt the door open, the cool breeze hitting the left side of my face. I know he's waiting for me to get out but I just couldn't get myself to move. I was hardly breathing. Truth is I didn't like the decision I had just made; I was terrified stiff of it. I eventually stopped staring out the window to stare at the seat across mine.
My whole body felt numb of fear. I never wanted this. Never asked for it. I just…did it…to help my family. I didn't want to live this life. It felt like I had just chosen my death sentence and was in shock of what I chose. I couldn't speak. I couldn't move. I was barely breathing in this nightmare I call reality.
"Bella?" he was calling for me but I didn't turn and look or respond back. I stayed still as if my life depended on it. "Clarice will show you to your room when your ready," he shut the door softly, I didn't even hear it, I just felt the breeze stop hitting the left side of my body.
I could feel the tears threatening to spill. You did this for a good reason Bella. Nothing bad is going to happen. Keep it together and we can make it through this, I thought preventing the tears to brim over. How will we make it through? You can never divorce the man. You'll have to live with him for the rest of your life, with no love, and no life.
I was ruined. This was like my death sentence. I was sentenced to live the rest of my life without love, without ever having a family, with…nothing. I sentenced my life to live with him until death do us part. That can be arranged. What are you thinking? Now you want to murder the man? I shook my head from the awful thought.
I can't believe I actually thought about killing him for a second. Maybe I'm evil?
Shut up! You don't know anything.
I know plenty. I'm you! Duh!
Oh right. Maybe I'm going insane; that's why I'm hearing the voices and thinking of killing my husband?
Hmmm….maybe you are…wait…no your not I just checked.
How am I not? I'm having conversations with my head.
I took a deep shaky breath and shook the voice away. I stepped out of the limo and followed the maid that was leading the way. The place was humongous, I wasn't wrong before; I'd get lost in this house someday; probably sooner than I think. There were butlers behind me carrying in my stuff, which isn't a lot; it felt awkward having other people do things I'd normally do.
We stopped on the third floor to the right, the door that was a maroon color with beautiful old designs on it. She opened the door and let me in like a…servant would. My eyes almost bulged out when I saw how huge my room was. Forget about the house, I was going to get lost in my room. The bed looked like for a princess with the huge headboard that has all four ends as high as the ceiling.
I walked in to find a huge closet, probably as big as a normal sized room; and a bathroom with a shower and a hot tub. I jumped on the bed but didn't quite make it so basically I fell off the bed with a small yelp. The butlers came to my aid immediately.
"Are you alright Mrs. Cullen?"
"Are you hurt?"
I shook my head as I straightened my dress out, "No. I'm fine really. Thanks." I looked up to meet very familiar eyes, "Jacob?" He nodded with a big grin across his face. I let out a weird sort of happy laugh before throwing my arms around him. Jacob is an old family friend. His dad is friends with my no good father, they've been friends since I, Rosalie and Jasper were babies.
When I was born I got real close to Jacob. We see each other as brother and sister. We grew up together but I haven't seen him in years. He hugged me back for a second until someone cleared their throat. He immediately put my arms to my sides and backed away.
"What's wrong?" I asked looking at the other butler that had cleared his throat.
"I'm your butler Mrs. Cullen I'm not supposed to have immediate contact with you. Its strictly business," he sounded like a butler. But as I looked at him, I could still see the old Jacob except his hair was shorter now and he was way taller than me.
I looked down feeling a bit rejected and depressed that I didn't have anyone here. "We'll be leaving now Mrs. Cullen," Clarice said as she led the butlers out. I bit my lip and nodded as they left. They had left me a pair of pajamas on the bed that weren't mine.
I guess they'll be hanging my clothes too. I got dressed and freshened up before jumping on the bed once more and making it this time. I slid under the soft furry covers and closed my eyes hoping to wake up on my bed hoping it was all a bad dream.
A/N: I decided to repost this again so I hope new readers enjoy it and old readers enjoy reading it again! please review!