a/n-This is quite possibly the most random thing that I have ever come up with. I have no idea how I even came up with the idea, now, but once it popped into my head, I had to write it out, and this is the result. Also, you should all go read the story I've co-authored with RedAsARose entitled The Color Purple, the plot of which has absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with this story. But I still think you should go check it out over at her profile.
Disclaimer-I don't own Power Rangers, Crayola, or Wikipedia.
The day began normally enough for Tommy. This particular, normal-seeming day happened to be a Saturday so Tommy slept in a bit later than he would have if it had been a weekday. When he got up he eventually wandered into his kitchen and poured himself a cup of coffee. He then made his way to the living room and turned the t.v. on. That was when his day stopped being normal.
Whatever program was supposed to be on had been interrupted by breaking news. Apparently the newbies had just won some battle or other. Tommy frowned slightly as he watched the newscaster's report. He hadn't really been following this newest team of rangers, but he knew that once they defeated their big bad, he'd have to do some serious research on them in order to update his video history. Hopefully they'd put it off until the summer…
He was about to turn the t.v. off in order to go take a shower when a flash of an unexpected color caught his attention. They were showing a recap from the battle and as Tommy's attention went back to the screen, he discovered that, apparently, there were no longer only three Jungle Fury rangers. No, now there were four. And the newest addition's color was…purple.
This was so not cool.
It was difficult enough being a teenaged super hero. But then Tommy had had to go and become a ranger again and again, with four different colors. And having all those colors made it very hard to pick just one that he liked the best, because everyone had to have a favorite color. So he had done the thing that seemed simplest to him: in the interest of not showing favoritism, he'd chosen a favorite color that wasn't a color that any power ranger had ever been before. It hadn't been the most difficult decision, then; it had barely taken two minutes for Tommy to decide upon purple as his favorite color.
It was a bit of a girly color, yes. But there were no laws of the universe saying that purple couldn't be Tommy's favorite color, so that was what it had become.
And the Jungle Fury rangers just had to go and ruin all of that. They had started out like so many other teams had in recent years, with just three rangers. Three rangers with three prime colors. Just blue, red, and yellow. It was just like how Dino Thunder had begun. And then, again like Dino Thunder, they'd added a fourth ranger. But, whereas Tommy had been classic black, Jungle Fury broke all of the unwritten rules of being a power ranger and added an entirely new color to the mix.
In a way, this was on the same scale of insanity as when Alyssa had become Wild Force's white ranger, of all colors. Seeing as how she was only the second white ranger ever, however, a female white ranger was nowhere near as bad as when Tori became the blue ranger for Ninja Storm. Blue was not and had never been a girl color!
And now there was a purple ranger.
It had been nearly a decade since Zordon's death, but it was immensely irritating to Tommy now, because he didn't know who to blame for all of the Color Codes getting mixed up. Since Zordon had died, each new team had had its own mentor, but who was the one who really picked what colors that team was going to have? Tommy had no idea, and it was a problem.
Well, that, and his newfound lack of a favorite color.
Tommy merely sat there gazing unseeingly at the t.v. which had gone back to the regularly scheduled programming by now, when a solution suddenly popped into his head: he would pick a new favorite color.
It was most likely going to be the hardest decision he would ever have to make in his entire life. With the most recent expansion of the rainbow of colors that were off limits to him, in order to not show a bias towards anyone, it was imperative that he choose a color that was not and could not possibly ever be associated with any team of power rangers ever. It was going to be a challenge.
And who was the one person in the world who was best at helping Tommy sort through all of his problems? Hayley, of course. So it was to Hayley Tommy would go to discuss with her what color, exactly, he should replace purple with as his favorite color. But first he needed a shower.
That said, an hour later he was in the Cyberspace Café explaining why, exactly, he needed help picking out a new favorite color. There was no danger of him being overheard, because it was still quite early for the usual Saturday crowd, and any self-respecting teenager was still sleeping.
"You're kidding, right?" Hayley asked, grinning, once Tommy had finished speaking.
"No." Tommy said, frowning.
"You really want to change your favorite color just because there's a purple power ranger, now?" Hayley questioned, eyebrows raised.
"And you need my help to do that?" Hayley continued. "Why?"
"I thought purple was a safe color," Tommy began, totally serious, "But obviously I was wrong. I need your help to come up with every single color that you can think of, so that the new color I pick never becomes a ranger color."
"You have some serious issues, you know that, right?" Hayley asked now.
Tommy glanced around surreptitiously to make sure that no one had come in since he'd last checked. "Former teenage super hero, remember?"
Hayley rolled her eyes. "Fine, I guess I could help you. We can go in my office and use the computer and I'll leave my new assistant manager in charge. It's about time I tested her anyway."
Five minutes later they were both seated at Hayley's desk, her laptop between them.
"So, where should we start looking?" Tommy asked.
"I think I have an idea." Hayley said, pulling her laptop so that it was now facing only her and typing something in. When she turned it back to show Tommy, he raised an eyebrow at her, doubtful.
"The Crayola Crayon page on Wikipedia?" He asked.
"It's not just the page for Crayola crayons." Hayley informed him, "It's the page for Crayola crayon colors."
"Really?" Tommy demanded. "We're really going to begin my search for a new favorite color not only on Wikipedia, of all the unreliable sites, but on the page for Crayola crayon colors?"
"There are 133 different colors." Hayley noted, pulling her laptop back to face her and scanning the text at the top of the page. "And those are just standard colors. There are also a bunch of other specialty ones."
"We'll stick with the standard colors." Tommy said. "Out of 133 colors, there's bound to be something I like. What's first?"
"Almond?" Tommy repeated. "That's practically white. What's next?"
"That's too close to Gold. Next."
"That's barely even a color. It's like a pinkish white."
"Then there's Aquamarine."
"Not only is that a food that I don't like, it's green."
"No. Just no."
"It's yellow, and I really wouldn't want to share with anyone that my favorite color is called 'banana mania' anyway."
"What kind of color is that? Whatever happened to plain brown!"
"Bittersweet…it looks kind of like red to me."
"It's still blue."
"Then we'll skip Blue, Blue Bell, Blue Grey, Blue Green, and Blue Violet too?" Hayley questioned, scrolling down the list.
"Yes." Tommy replied. "Next."
"I'm not telling people that my favorite color is blush!"
"Just skip anything that has the colors red, blue, yellow, green, white, black, pink, silver, gold, or purple in them."
"We'll see. It's too common to be safe for long, though, probably."
"Orange is pretty common, too…"
"Burnt Sienna…that looks pretty orange, to me, though."
"No Cadet Blue." Hayley muttered to herself. "Canary—oh wait, that's pretty yellow. No Caribbean Green or Carnation Pink, either. What about Cerise? It's technically a pink, but it's such an obscure word, you'll probably never meet someone who knows what color it actually is."
"It's still pink. I was already stretching it with purple. I'm not making my favorite color any shade of pink; it's too girly. Besides if I say an obscure word that nobody would know, people will probably ask me what it looks like."
"Ok then, Cerulean."
"That's a blue."
"I was hoping you wouldn't know that without looking at the color sample next to the word." Hayley muttered to herself. "Next is Chestnut."
"That could be a possibility. But keep going anyway."
"Eh…it's a metal, like silver and gold."
"What does it look like?" Tommy asked.
"Blue." Hayley admitted.
"No." Tommy stated. "What kind of color name is 'cornflower' anyway?"
"A strange one." Hayley responded, her eyes still on the list she was scrolling down. "Let's see, Cotton Candy is pink and blue, so no for that. And no Dandelion or Denim. Desert Sand?"
"We'll come back to that one. It might be a possibility."
"I wouldn't eat that, so no way is it going to be my favorite color. Plus, it kind of has a purple hue to it, doesn't it?"
"True…hmm…no Electric Lime, it's like a neon combination of yellow and green. Also, no Fern or Forest Green; they're too green for you. And then there's Fuchsia, which I'm sure is too girly and too pink for you. Fuzzy Wuzzy?"
Tommy just stared at Hayley, incapable of voicing what he was thinking at the current moment.
"OK then. Let's see…No Gold, no Goldenrod, no Granny Smith Apple…Is Gray too Silver for you?" Tommy nodded. "I thought so…hmm…no green, no green blue, no green yellow…" Hayley paused, a wide grin coming over her face. "How about Hot Magenta? I think that'd be the perfect color for you."
"How about no."
"Fine. No inchworm and no indigo. Jazzberry Jam?"
"Seriously, where do they come up with these names?"
Hayley merely shrugged, continuing with the search. "I probably shouldn't even mention Jungle Green, should I?"
"No. No you shouldn't."
"No Laser Lemon…How about Lavender?"
"No Lemon Yellow…ooh, what about Macaroni and Cheese?"
"Why are all of these colors named after food?" Tommy questioned.
"No idea." Hayley replied absentmindedly. "No magenta, no magic mint…mahogany is a nice color. But it's probably too red for you. Then there's maize…a bit too yellow, I'd imagine. Manatee?"
"Too gray, which means too almost silver."
"If I chose that one, I'd never admit it to another living person, so no way."
"Melon's probably too pink for you, so Midnight Blue."
"It's a blue."
"Oops, my bad. Moving on...Mountain Meadow's rather green, so no…how about Mulberry?"
"We're also going to rule out any kind of food."
"Navy Blue…that was Ninja Storm, wasn't it?"
"Neon Carrot, that sounds promising, don't you think?"
"You're much too picky." Hayley complained. "Ok, so no olive green, I'm assuming no orange, too?"
"You assume correctly."
"Ok, then no orange red or orange yellow, too. How about orchid?"
"It's purple and pink again."
"True. Ooh, how about Outer Space?"
"Have you forgotten about the Space rangers?"
"Fine then. Let's see, no outrageous orange, no pacific blue…peach is just like apricot and a food…periwinkle?"
"Pine Green—that's a 'no' I know…Pink Flamingo?" Tommy glared at her. "Ok then, I'm guessing Pink Sherbert is out too, then. How about plum?"
"I think you're purposely ignoring the food rule."
"That's because it's a ridiculous rule. Moving on though, Purple Heart is out, I'm sure. So that means there's no Purple Mountain's Majesty or Purple Pizzazz. No Radical Red. Raw Sienna?"
"Why is it 'raw?' What's wrong with just plain sienna?"
"That's probably another no, then. And I'm guessing Raw Umber will be too. Razzle Dazzle Rose?"
"The pink ranger on Operation Overdrive was named Rose."
"I'm starting to think this is all just a waste of time. Are you positive you absolutely need a favorite color?"
"But just look at the list," Hayley protested, "I just know you're going to find fault with the next ten colors. Razzmatazz is a funny word and it looks pink. Red has been out from the start. Red orange has the word red in it. Red violet is red and purple, so that's a double no. Robin's Egg blue has blue in it, and so does Royal Purple. Salmon is probably too pink for you. Scarlet is too red, I'm sure; it even used to be called Torch Red. Screamin' Green and Sea Green both have green in them, so they're out too. Why can't you just pick one of the colors you've been? Say green was your favorite color because it was your first. Or, better yet, say you don't have a favorite color, because if you had to pick one, you'd pick white, but white isn't really a color. White is the absence of color, so therefore you don't have a color that you like best."
"What's next?" Tommy pressed on.
"Sepia. You didn't listen to a single word I just said, did you?"
"It's definitely a possibility. It's pretty brown, but I'm still not sure how I feel about that color. Next."
"There was a shadow ranger once, wasn't there?"
"I think you're thinking of the Phantom Ranger."
"Eh, same thing. Next."
"Too green. Next."
"Shocking Pink, that's out…um, then there's silver, also a no. Hmm...Sky Blue, Spring Green, Sunglow, and Sunset Orange, all out I'll assume. Tan?"
"It's just like peach and apricot all over again. Next."
"Teal blue—that's out. Thistle?"
"Isn't that a plant? Why do words have to have so many different uses?"
"Next is Tickle Me Pink, and I don't even know why I bothered reading that one, because I would have to hurt you if you even considered that one, never mind the fact that it's been out since the beginning because it's pink. Timberwolf?"
"Too many people with wolf powers. Next."
"Tropical Rain Forest."
"That's not a color."
"Yes it is."
"No it isn't."
"Well, according to Crayola it is."
"Stupid Crayola. Next."
"A bunch of no's: Turquoise Blue, Unmellow Yellow, Violet, Violet Blue, and Violet Red. Vivid Tangerine?"
"Sounds too orangey to me."
"After that there's just a bunch more no's: Vivid Violet, White, Wild Blue Yonder, Wild Strawberry, Wild Watermelon, Wisteria, Yellow, Yellow Green, and Yellow Orange. We've just gone through 133 different colors. Please tell me you've got something."
"Maybe…" Came Tommy's reply.
"What about Desert Sand?" Hayley questioned, scrolling back up the list. "You liked that one, right?"
"It was OK." Tommy conceded. "But, you know, the world is supposed to end in 2012. What if the earth turns into a giant desert wasteland or something, and there's only a small group of people left and they have a team of power rangers defending them? What then, Hayley? Clearly, I can't choose Desert Sand, in case that happens."
Hayley rolled her eyes. "Yes, I'm sure one day in the near future the world is going to turn into a desert wasteland. Sure, Tommy, whatever you say."
"What other ones did I say I liked?" Tommy asked now.
"I don't remember." Hayley said with a shrug. "You're the one I liked them. I think one of them was brown, though."
"Too common, remember?" Tommy replied. "It's bound to become a ranger color one day."
"Brown?" Hayley questioned. "A brown ranger?"
"You think that way now," Tommy told her, "But I once thought the same thing about purple."
"But what about orange?" Hayley asked. "I know you said you didn't like that one because it was a food, but that really not a good basis for choosing colors you like. And I really can't see orange ever becoming a ranger color."
"It compliments blue, you know." Tommy informed her. "I can just see orange being the trim on someone's uniform one day."
"Why would someone put orange trim on a uniform?" Hayley questioned.
"How should I know?" Tommy demanded. "I don't even know who picks what colors go with what rangers. Besides, just look at Alyssa. She was a white ranger, but her uniform was trimmed in pink of all colors! If you're a white ranger, just stick with white, why add another color?"
"You do realize you just provided a perfect argument for orange not being included in someone's uniform someday, right?" Hayley asked her old friend, whose sanity she frequently questioned.
"There must have been others color that I thought might be decent." Tommy said now, ignoring her.
"Um…Chestnut." Hayley offered. "Otherwise no."
"We can't go with Chestnut." Tommy complained. "There's the food rule, now."
"This is crazy!" Hayley suddenly exclaimed, shutting her laptop suddenly. "You really don't need a favorite color!"
"Yes I do." Tommy insisted. "Everyone has a favorite color. I can't just not have one."
"No you don't." Hayley stated firmly. "I don't have a favorite color."
"That's just bizarre." Tommy informed her, to which she responded by rolling her eyes.
"I had one when I was a kid, but seriously Tommy, what do I really need one for?" Hayley asked him. "Colors are just colors."
"I think you had a deprived childhood." Tommy stated.
"I think you had a messed-up childhood." Hayley responded. "You are the one who is a former superhero, let's not forget. And it's because of that whole gig that we're even sitting here discussing favorite colors. And speaking of that, can we be done here yet? Clearly you aren't going to come up with a color that you like."
Tommy sighed defeated. "Didn't you have another suggestion? Something about picking one of the colors that I've been…?"
"I knew you weren't listening." Hayley muttered to herself, and then louder, "You should pick white."
"Why white?" Tommy wanted to know.
"Well, think about it, there have only been four white rangers." Hayley said. "And if someone complains about you…I don't know, dissing all of the other colors that you've been, I'm sure you can come up with examples of your time as the white ranger that made it the best of all of your colors. Also, as I said before, technically, white isn't a color at all. It's the absence of color, so really it's like you won't have had to pick between your colors at all, because white isn't a color. It's nothing."
Tommy sat there in silent contemplation for a moment. Then, "Fine. I'll pick white."
"Thank you." Hayley said with a smile. "Now, I do believe I'll be getting back to work. I'm sure most of my regular customers will be awake by now."
As Tommy made his way back home a few minutes later, he couldn't help but think that if he had to choose between his four colors, white was definitely the best choice. He really had enjoyed his time as the white ranger the best. Green had been marred by that whole being evil incident. By red, the ranger thing was starting to get a bit old. And when black came around, he really was old, and it was just strange being a power ranger again. But he had been in his prime as the white ranger, and everything had been perfect.
Well, everything had been perfect if you could call fighting the monsters and henchmen of the evil villains living on the moon on a daily basis, barely leaving time for anything else but breathing, perfect. Then yes, everything had been perfect. But it had been fun, too.
So perhaps white was a good choice for a favorite color. It was a good thing Tommy had gone to Hayley for advice; otherwise it would have taken him ages to come up with anything. Of course, some of the stuff she had said was a bit questionable.
Seriously, who did she think she was kidding? Everyone had a favorite color…