Disclaimer: I own nothing but the plot.
"Is that really necessary?" asked the young woman in front of me, fiddling nervously with her sleeves.
"Yes, it is." I said in my usual calm, patient tone when I'm talking to a patient. I pushed the record button on the tape recorder then turned back to her, giving her my full attention.
" I uh, I don't know where to start." She said licking her lips nervously.
"Well that's okay. This is only the first session so if your not ready to talk about whatever's bothering you then we could talk about something else until your ready. How about what you did this morning?" I asked hoping to get her to open up to me.
"Um, I went for a run at seven this morning. I had a piece of toast for breakfast and took a shower. I painted my nails and then tried to take a nap but I couldn't sleep so I went ahead and got ready before straitening up my room and coming here." She said releasing an anxious breath once she was finished. I observed her for a second watching her play with the sleeves of her shirt, pulling them down her arms.
"Do you sleep well?" I asked. She looked up at me then with wide bloodshot eyes and whispered a quiet no. "Insomnia?" I asked trying to clue in on what she wasn't saying.
"Something like that."
"How much sleep would you say you normally get?"
"Mostly only about two hours. Sometime four if I'm lucky."
"What about eating? Do you eat well?" I asked noticing her very thin state. Her shirt was very loose, almost hanging off her shoulder.
"I eat but I can't really keep it down. The only thing I can keep down is toast and soup." She said voice emotionless.
"What about running?" I asked changing the subject.
"What about it?" She asked confused.
"Why do you run?" I asked slowly, trying to ease her into the subject.
"I d-don't know." She said stuttering a bit on her words.
"Are you running towards something? Away?" I asked clarifying what I meant.
"Away." She said tears filling up her blue eyes.
"What do you feel when you run?" I asked curiously.
"Nothing." She admitted, sounding almost hopeful.
"Nothing? At all?" I asked hoping she'd clarify.
"Yeah." She said looking over at the clock before looking back at me. "Just empty."
"You sound happy about that."
"Why?" I asked. She fiddled with her sleeves again and bit her lip before replying to my question.
"I've been feeling a lot of different emotions as of lately."
"What kind of emotions?" I asked making a note of this.
"Anger. Resentment. Disgust." She said choking on the last word.
"Disgust? What disgusts you?"
"Myself mostly." She admitted scratching the back of her neck.
"Why are you disgusted by yourself?"
"Well look at me doctor. Don't I look disgusting?" She said spreading her arms out in front of her. "And before you start thinking I'm anorexic or bulimic, think again. I'm not throwing up willingly." She said with fire in her voice.
"Where do you think these feelings stem from? Not just the disgust part but the anger and resentment you feel."
"Well I'm angry at everyone really. I don't know why either. Logically I know I shouldn't be angry or resent them but I guess I can't help it."
"Is there an event in your life that would cause you to have these emotions?" She nodded biting her lip again. I could see it was turning red from her constant torture. "Mind telling me about it?"
"It's a long story." She said her breath hitching on the last word.
"Why don't you start at the beginning?" I suggested shifting in my seat.
"Okay" She looked down at her lap before glancing up at me through her bangs and starting her story.
A/N: So I wasn't going to start this yet but the idea wouldn't stop bugging me so I decided to go ahead. Before you start worrying I'm not going to forget about my other stories. I will try to update them all fairly often but I can't promise how soon some of my stories will be updated considering the three multi-chaptered stories I'm writing and the TVD_LAS challenge on lj. Also just a fair warning when reading this story it is going to contain VERY dark events so turn back if your easily offended or sensitive to dark subject matter. Thank you all for reading and I appreciate all of your lovely reviews.