Emily could have sworn that her heart stopped when she heard the gunshot over the phone. It took absolutely all of her self control not to loose it completely as she called for Reid to answer her. She could feel herself shaking as she called for the ambulance, and she couldn't quite believe that she didn't break down, compartmentalization all aside. The shaking had only subsided after Morgan had called, asking about Hotch and reassuring her that Reid was okay, that the wound wasn't life threatening, so she had pulled it together. They had to deal with Foyet after all, and she knew that she couldn't be distracted, she had to be there for Hotch, he needed her.
Even still, she didn't breathe properly until she saw him, and in the hospital room, with Morgan and JJ, she restrained herself from smothering him. He reassured them all that he was fine, that the wound was a through and through, and he'd just need physical therapy after it healed. Emily wrung her hands together anxiously, waiting for Morgan and JJ to return to Hotch, which she knew they eventually would.
It was a whole hour more, when Morgan and JJ felt that Reid was well enough to leave, and Emily eagerly offered to stay and keep Reid company, hoping desperately that neither would question her motives. She shut the door behind them, and pulled the blinds over the window into the hospital floor. Glancing over at Reid, she watched him shift over to the side of the bed, and pat the empty space as encouragement. Wordlessly, she climbed into the hospital bed and nestled against Spencer's chest, careful not to disturb his knee.
His arms wrapped around her protectively pressed a kiss into her hair. And then, only then, did Emily finally break down, her entire body quivering as she sobbed into his chest. Her hand clutched at his hospital gown and in a few minutes, she calmed down enough to pull away slightly. In an instant, the worry on her face was replaced with anger.
"You could have been killed," she growled, her fist twisting in the gown menacingly. "You dropped the phone and didn't answer me and I thought you had died." Reid gulped audibly, not trying to provoke her consciously, but unable to help himself. "You can't do that to me. You just can't. You pick up that phone and you tell me that you're okay."
"Emily," he attempted to sooth, brushing a hand through her hair. "I'm so sorry," he bit his lip guiltily, "I tried to get Morgan to give me my cell phone, but he insisted that we had to get to the hospital, I should have tried harder. I didn't realize that you heard the shot," Spencer attempted to explain. "Emily, what's wrong?" He asked, pulling her closer.
"I don't deserve you," she mumbled, pressing her face into his shoulder. "You were shot and you're apologizing. I shouldn't have left you alone there. Hotch was already in the hospital."
"Emmy," Spencer interrupted, "I'm fine. This is part of our job, and you know that. You needed to leave, we needed to find Hotch, its not your fault. I know you, Emily, and I know that you've been struggling to contain yourself all day, and this would be easier if we had just told the team, but we both know we can't do that," he reminded her gently.
Emily just sniffed, he was right, he always was. "I love you, you know that, right?" She spoke it aloud, more for herself than for him. She needed to remind herself why all the pain was worth it.
"Of course I do, Emmy, I love you too," He smiled, wincing slightly as he shifted, agitating his knee.
"Spencer," she frowned, "its okay to be not fine." Emily curled into his chest, silently reminding herself that he was there, that he was alive, and that the nightmare that had been playing through her head all day was just that, a nightmare. "If you want to put on the tough act in front of the team, that's fine, I understand, but trust me. You know I won't think any less of you. Be Spencer, don't be Doctor Reid."
Spencer just nodded and tilted his head down and pressed a kiss to Emily's lips. Pulling away with a smile, "but I have to let you think I'm macho. How else am I supposed to be the perfect alpha male," he teased.
"You don't have anyone fooled, you're far too smart to be an alpha male," Emily replied with a grin, and pressed her face back into his chest. Spencer pulled the scratchy hospital blankets over the two of them, and settled down next to Emily, the rest of the team wouldn't be in to check on him for a while, and he was quite comfortable exactly where he was.