Disclaimer: Don't own Twilight, Stephenie Meyer does and I love herrrr! (too much)

A/N: I know you guys are tired of my excuses but I'm kind-of going through a tough time. Between this guy I've liked for 5 years and my parents wanting me to move in with my dad, it's getting pretty ridiculous. So, I'm sorry it took me a while to update.

Anyway, there's no excuse! I've had great reviews and the patience you guys have for me is absolutley mind-blowing!



I woke up and it was freezing cold in my room. I jumped a little and tried to grab at Jacob for warmth but he was gone. I sat up straight and looked at myself in the mirror across my room.

Hot damn I was a mess.

I tried to flatten my hair down with my hands but it was a pointless effort. I stood up and wobbled a little, my bare feet touched the cold wood floor and I flinched. Why was it so cold? Last night it was warm and humid.

It was the end of Fall, which meant the border between cold and lukewarm was thinning. I looked at my alarm clock, I only had another five minutes before my alarm clock went off. I unplugged it and headed for the shower, I needed to detangle my hair and get ready for work.

Ew, work.

I still work at the Sandwich Shack to make overpriced sandwiches for six dollars an hour. It's not considered a "dream job" but it helps me pay for gas and every once in a while I get a bonus which works out just fine for me.

I couldn't help but feel like something was wrong when I stepped into the shower, the warm water waking up my senses and making my muscles creak and groan. All I could think about was how three weeks from now I would be getting married to Jacob Black.

My heart fluttered.

I almost fell out of the shower thinking about my wonderful, wonderful, wonderful fiancé and how close our wedding was.


After I got ready for work, Emily sent me a text message saying "we have to hang out before you're tied to the ol' ball and chain!" I laughed at that and was in a good mood for the rest of my shift. I have to say, it made me really happy today when some guy tried to pick me up and I twinkled my fingers at him, showing him my ring.

"Sorry, I'm taken," I told him smugly.

It made my day.

On my way home, I called Emily and told her I was coming over. She said her parents weren't home so it was all in the clear for me to stop by.

"Nessie-boo!" Emily cheered when I pulled into the driveway, she jogged lightly to my car and when I got out she hugged me so close it hurt my ribs.

"Oh hey there, Maid of Honor," I said pointedly. She squealed and at that I had to laugh. I had just seen Emily last week but lately I'd been busy wedding planning with Jacob and our parents.

"I'm so happy this is finally happening!" Emily smiled, kissing my cheek and taking my hand, towing me into her house.

"I know! It seems so slow though…" I admitted and Emily laughed, shaking her head.

"Slow? Honey, once your married things will be going way too slow for you to even handle!" She sassed and I rolled my eyes, following her up the stairs to her room.

"And you're the expert on marriage." I laughed and she frowned. She sat down on her bed and patted the spot next to her for me to sit.

"I am… Kind-of… Look, I was talking to Embry-"

"Whoa, you're talking to Embry?" I asked incredulously.

"No! That's not what I said! Jeez! I said I was just talking to Embry like, a couple of days ago about the wedding you doof." She made a gesture like I was retarded and I sighed.

"Okay, so then what?" I asked, smacking her hand away as she tried to continue mocking me.

"And he said he was talking to Jacob and Jacob said that he wants to get it on with you on your honeymoon," Emily raised her eyebrows and I shrugged.

"Okay… Isn't that normal?" I stated obviously.

"NO! Not just like, have sex… He wants to do some, like, kinky stuff with you." Emily corrected herself and it was my turn to raise my eyebrows.

"Wait, wait, wait. Kinky stuff? What does that mean?" I asked, obliviously. Emily rolled her eyes and put her hand on my knee.

"He wants to tie you up while you scream for help and have sex with you against your will," Emily said seriously. I stared at her, dumbfounded for a moment. "Just kidding! I don't know! Oh! Wait… I think he wants you to talk dirty to him!" Emily continued and I was finally able to snap back to our conversation.

"What does that mean?" I asked, honestly curious.

"Oh Nessie," Emily sighed, shaking her head, "You and your innocence."

"What? What does it mean?" I asked anxiously, grabbing Emily's wrist just as she was about to pull away.

"Easy there, puppy. Look, it's like… How do I explain this to someone like you…" She tapped her finger to her chin and I huffed.

"Someone like me? What does that mean?" I asked, offended.

"Wren, chill. I'm just trying to figure this out so your innocent mind can process this," Emily assured me.

"That's a lot of big words, Em. You okay?" I asked, laughing as I did.

"I don't have to explain this to you, y'know." She laughed as well and I stopped.

"I'm sorry! No! Please tell me!" I begged her, my lower lip jutting out again.

"Okay, it's like… Saying dirty words." She said quietly.

"Like what?" I whispered back.

"Like… Pussy." She wrinkled her nose, whispering again.

"Ew why would- Wait, why are we whispering? There's no one home!" I shouted, listening to the echo of my voice around the house.

"Well, sorry, I'm just a little self-conscious of that word." Emily shrugged, lying back on her bed. I laid back next to her and sighed.

"Well, that's it? Just the P word?" I asked, tucking my hair back behind my ear.

"No! It's like… Oh daddy fuck me harder! I'm such a bad girl!" Emily yelled at the top of her lungs and I stared blankly at her.

"I am not saying that," I said sternly. Emily chuckled and shook her head.

"On your honeymoon you sure as hell are!" She yelled out again and I clapped my hand over her mouth.

"NO!" I shouted over her.

"Yes! For me? C'mon! I would pay money, cold hard cash, to see you talk dirty!" Emily laughed, sitting up and looking down at me, "Look, I'll help you, let's practice. I'll be Jacob and you be you." She suggested, getting up and walking off to her closet.

"Em, I really don't want to-" I sat up to look at her pop out of the closet, wagging her eyebrows at me.

"Who's Em?" Emily asked, using a deep voice imitation of Jacob.

"Okay this is ridiculous, you don't even sound like him." I laughed, putting my hands on my hips.

"Like who? Are you cheating on me?" Emily shouted in a man's voice.

"Emily…" I sighed, putting my hand over my face.

"Oh Nessie, don't be such a killjoy. Just play along!" She shouted, exasperated.

"Fine." I grumbled and crossed my legs, looking back at Emily, "Go!" I urged.

"Oh, right," She cleared her throat, "So baby, what do you want to do tonight now that we're married and we won't be living in sin anymore?" Emily winked and I cracked up.

"I," I stopped to laugh again, "I don't know… What do you want to do?" I chuckled. Emily shook her head, still in character.

"I want to slide my hard cock into your tight wet pu-"

"STOP!" I shrieked, putting my hands over my ears.

"That's dirty talk! Get with it, hoe!" Emily laughed.

"EW! That is so gross Emily!" I groaned, leaning back on her pillows with my forearm over my eyes.

"Well, it's your man that wants it, not me," She shrugged. "Now repeat after me," She looked at me and I sighed.

"Fine." I sighed heavily and sat up again.

"Jacob, you get me so wet." She said seductively.

"EW!" I cried out and put my hands over my face. Emily clawed my hands off my face, screaming, "Say it you wimp!"

"NO!" I screamed in protest.

"If you don't say it you'll never live through marriage!" She sang out in a sing-song voice.

"UGH! Emily I really don't want those words to leave my mouth!" I growled stubbornly. Emily crossed her arms and looked up at the ceiling, shaking her head.

"Say it goddamn it!" She snapped. I recoiled like I was slapped with a sad puppy dog look on my face, "Go!" She yelled. I hunched my back and whispered.

"Jacob… You get me… So… Moist." I said softly.

"Louder! And say wet! Moist doesn't count! Does he only get you half-horny?" She dictated and I groaned.

"Jacob… You get me… I can't do it Em!" I yelled, feeling defeated.

"Yes you can! Just do it and get it over with!" She screamed.

"NO!" I yelled back.

"YES!" She bellowed.

"NO!" I sat up and stared her dead in the eyes.

"YES!" She stepped forward.

"NO!" I stomped my feet like I was having a tantrum.


"JACOB YOU MAKE ME SO WET!" I cried out, frustrated.

"MOAN IT!" She ordered.

"Jacob you make me so wet!" I moaned out loud and Emily smiled.

"Rub your boobs!" She ordered again and I felt like her whore.

"Jacob you make me so mother fucking wet I soak my panties!" I mewled and rubbed my boobs.

"YAY! You did it!" She cheered, charging me and hugging me as I fell flat on my back on her bed.

"I feel so dirty!" I screeched.

"That's the point of dirty talk bobo!" She laughed, getting up and I frowned.

"This lesson is over." I laughed, getting up.

"Aw, alright. It's getting late anyways." She chuckled as I grabbed my things. She looked down at my neck and gasped.

"Renesmee Carlie Cullen you dirty, dirty girl!" She screeched.

"What?" I yelled, paranoid.

"Is that a hickey?" She yelped.

"What, where?" I put my hand on my chin and she rolled her eyes, putting her finger over it.

"OW!" I whimpered. It hurt like a bitch!

"Oh my God! Jacob gave you a hickey?" She laughed, looking at it like it was from another planet.

"I don't remember him giving me one I mean I fell asleep on him and- Oh that ass hole!" I said, completely shocked Jacob gave me a hickey in my sleep.

"Wow. How are you going to go home like that? You're parents are going to freak!" She giggled with pleasure and I smacked her arm.

"He's my fiancé, they shouldn't care-"

"You know damn well that is not what will be going through their heads." Emily lectured, pointing her finger at me.

"Do you have a scarf or something?" I asked, my shoulders slumping.

"Hun, we live in La Push, Washington… I think I have a scarf or two." She smiled sarcastically and I stuck my tongue out at her. After I borrowed her scarf and made sure it passed all of Emily's hickey-free tests I was ready to leave.

She walked me out to my car and I sat in the drivers side, buckling my seatbelt. Before I drove off I lowered my window and screamed, "Emily!"

"What?" She called back.

"Thanks," I winked and she threw her head back and laughed, giving me a thumbs up. On the road home I sent Jacob a text message that I knew would make him laugh, no matter what he was doing:

Thanks for the hickey, Romeo. You're quite the romantic.

Halfway down La Push drive my phone vibrated in my center console and I looked down at the text message Jacob had sent me in response:

It was my pleasure, try putting a frozen spoon against it, it works for me.

I laughed and rolled my eyes, sending him one last text before I concentrated on the road.

Works for you? I'm pretty sure if your girlfriend found out she'd be pretty pissed.

At the next red light my phone buzzed again and I smiled so hard at the next text it made my face hurt:


A/N: Hope you guys liked it! Thanks for reviewing and being so understanding. I'm going through a pretty tough time like I said before, and right now writing is my only outlet. Sometimes I have to be careful because if, for instance, I wrote the next chapter today, everyone would die and that would be the end... :)

Just 7 reviews this time guys!