Welcome to Misery, part one: boarding school for the artistically gifted

Konan sighed, looking out at the pounding rain. It was lovely. She had decided years ago that rain was her favourite weather. It was so calming, and peaceful...it really was a wonderful sensation, to watch the rain. It wasn't a wonderful sensation at all to be standing in the cold, completely drenched, banging on the door of a school that looked more like a gothic asylum. The building was pitch black against the grey sky, with tall, spiked metal fences surrounding the unkempt grounds and chips and cracks in almost every windowpane. Konan sighed: her paper flower had long since been discarded as a lost cause: it had become so soggy she was worried it would melt into her hair. She banged on the door again. She checked the name: was she where she was supposed to be? She looked at the large brass plate upon the door. St Misery's School for the Artistically Gifted. This was the right place alright. This was going to be her new home for the next two years. Her father had insisted that she would love it. She wasn't quite so sure, but then, she didn't have anywhere else to go, and the building was...lovely...in its own gothic...scary-looking way. Finally somebody opened the door. It was a girl, dressed in a high-collared black dress with a light grey apron tied around her waist with a thin black bow. Konan liked her outfit. But she was probably a maid. She had dark brown hair, around the same length as Konan's own blue. She smiled, and curtseyed. Since when do people do that? Konan wondered, thinking that this place might be more like a macabre dream than a real school.

"Are you Konan Amega?" she asked, somehow both timid and forward at the same time. Konan nodded. "Come in. Lady Tsunade'd like to meet you before you get settled. I'm Shizune, by the way." she said. Konan wasn't sure how to reply to that, so she kept quiet. Shizune seemed happy just to tell her about the place as they mounted long staircases. Konan looked around her as they walked; there were paintings all over the place, and statues that looked quite Greek, and doors to classrooms that had all been painted in various styles. Lots of them were covered with clay figures, some had paper-mache people on them, or hands coming out of them. Some even had metal dragons and animals that seemed to leap out at them from the doors. There were mobiles hanging from the celings, there were paintings and murals and sculptures and wood carvings and stories or poems that went ceiling to floor, wall to wall...there was art of almost every kind decorating the stone walls. Konan almost strained her neck, looking around herself.

"...your baggage arrived two days ago, so it's lucky that it rain until today..." Shizune was still talking, Konan realized suddenly. "Here you go. This is Lady Tsunade's office." Shizune said, stopping outside ornately carved double doors (with some not-so-ornate carvings along the bottom: swears, grotesque faces, perverted images...). Shizune knocked twice, then opened the door, beckoning for Konan to go in first.

Konan walked inside.

Her first impression of the room was that Lady Tsunade had tried to create a haven in which she could pretend that there weren't a thousand or so teenagers running and shouting and who-knows-what-ing right outside. The walls were a calming shade of pale grass green, and the carpet was an ocean blue. There were huge windows behind the large mahogany desk, sheilded from the view of the rain by long white curtains, which quivered slightly with the small breeze created by the opening of the door. Lady Tsunade herself was sitting at her desk, scribbling something down on a pad of paper. Konan walked forwards awkwardly, and sat down on one of the wooden chairs when Shizune made a half-frantic point from her to the chair. Konan looked up at the headmistress. She had long-ish pale blonde hair that was tied back in two pigtails, kind-looking brown eyes, and the biggest boobs Konan had ever seen. Being a rather soft-yet-slim girl with no curves to boast about, Konan was flabbergasted by the Headmistress's watermelons. They were HUGE! She tore her eyes away from the impossibly big mounds of flesh to see Lady Tsunade looking at her with a my-eyes-are-here expression. Konan looked at her feet.

"Konan Amega. It's a pleasure to have you here." she said, in a kind, straightforward voice. Konan looked up again. "Shizune has a copy of your course schedule for you, as well as a time table." Shizune handed Konan several sheets of paper, which Konan began to read. Okay...

Monday - 9:00 - Origami - 10:30 - Break - 10:45 - Drawing - 12:15 - Lunch - 1:45 - Gym - 2:30 - Music - 7:30 - Dinner - 11: 15 - Lights Out, no shit.

Konan stifled a giggle. No shit...

Tuesday to Friday was much the same as that, except instead of origami, drawing and music, she had painting, sculpture, metalshop, sewing, and choir. Gym was every day. Weekends, it was all free time except for Special Events. Konan supposed that she would find out what that was later.

"Now, Konan...because of a slight mix-up in your arrangements..." Konan looked up. A mix-up? Oh dear. Tsunade looked a teensy bit sheepish. Konan looked to Shizune, who gave the tiniest shake of the head: not now.

"...Because of the rather unique way in which you have been admitted to this school...We didn't have your admission in time to secure you a place to sleep with the girls...But luckily, your father has mailed us a form of consent allowing you to sleep in the room that we do have available, because one of the other pupils...er...couldn't attend." Konan was trying to follow. She...didn't have a room with girls...so...no way. She couldn't mean...

"The room that has been prepared for you has its own bathroom, (so naturally everybody's jealous) and a lock on the door." Tsunade was obviously straining to make this sound like amazing news instead of horrible news.

"I have made sure that you are completely welcome in the boy's dorm." Boys. Boys dorm. Konan's stomach had suddenly fallen down to her feet and was now writhing in among her achilles tendons. She had enough trouble talking to boys, let alone sleep in the same dorm as them...

Soon enough, however, she was trudging behind a once-again chatting Shizune, headed for doom...the boy's dorm.

Shizune stopped outside large double doors that had a large black chain around the handles.

"What's that for?" Konan asked, her voice a little unsteady as she stared at the threatening black chain.

"Oh, that." Shizune said as she rattled around, taking out a huge key from one of her deep pockets and fitting it into an ancient-looking lock. It's to stop any night-time wanderers or girl-chasers. Girl chasers...great. Konan sighed, absent-mindedly fiddling with her black skirt. It had three layers, and was long-sleeve. She was wearing a just-above-knee-length dark grey button-down coat over top, and black and gry vertical stripe tights with small black boots.

"Oh, that's right," Shizune suddenly said, undoing the chain with an echoing clatter. "Your school uniforms are on your bed, along with your luggage." "Oh, there's a school uniform?" Shizune nodded vigourously. "Oh yes. Anybody caught altering their uniform (cutting hems, sewing on lace, tearing sleeves, etc) is awarded, depending on the artisticness and detail of their outfit." Konan smiled: This was an art school, after all. "However," Shizune continued, flinging open the heavy doors and walking forwards into the darkened hall.

"Anyone who alters their uniform in a way that it is against the dress code, yes there is a dress code, is severely punished. Things like, cutting the skirt so short you can practically see their ass, tearing the top so their boobs hang out, show their stomach, or don't wear a uniform at all..." Konan laughed, and Shizune seemed to be recalling some kind of streaker event as her eyes slid out of focus and a grin appeared on her face. "...in any case, you can't alter your gym outfit too much, because that's the one that there isn't a back up for, in case your design doesn't work out." Konan nodded.

They were walking through the hall, and Konan could see doors on either side of them, each with locks and bolts on the outside. "These are the First years," Shizune pointed to four doors.

"Second years," two doors. ("There was a horrible bout of Intern's Disease that year, in Health class")"Third years...Fourth years...Here you are. Fifth years. There are Seven years, and Eighth and Ninth years if you are a total falier. Luckily we've only ever had one of those, and he died anyways, so it's no big thing." Shizune flapped her hand airily at the idea of one of the students merely dying. So trivial.

Konan was looking at the large door with dread. There were two doors with a big 5 on them, and she seemed to be faced with the more intimidating of the two: it was painted with an open, fanged mouth. Shizune walked forwards, unlocked the door, and walked in, Konan following, very unhappily.

They passed four doors, then stopped at the fifth. There was a chalkboard on the door, and Konan wrote her name on it, plain and simple, except for the extra loop on her K. She stepped inside. Shizune pointed out the lock on the door, and the key on the dresser. Konan decided that she could grow to love the room. There was a nice bathroom, too. Shizune reviewed everything she would need to know, including the fact that there was a holiday tomorrow, and an assembly.

"Good night, and welcome to St Misery!" Welcome to St Misery...Konan smirked. That just sounded funny. She locked her door, turned on the light, and looked around. There was nice pale, pale grey walpaper with faint silvery flowers on it, a grey and black checked bedspread, and dark, wood chests, table and chairs. There was a pale grey carpet over the dark panelled floor.

Konan smiled, flung her jacket onto the bed, and went to the bathroom. Turning on the light, she saw a large mirror, polished sink, toilet, and shower and- A HUGE SPIDER OHHHMYYYGODDDD Konan shrieked, a sound to wake the dead, sprinted out of the bathroom, grabbed her knives, everything she had smuggled past security, and flung it at the monsterous, hairy arachnid that was sitting at the bottom of the shower, sprinting out of the bathroom again after throwing everything she had at it, and then leaped onto her bed, shuddering. She hated spiders. She sat there for a little bit until she thought she heard muffled laughter. Frowning, she cautiously tip-toed into the bathroom. And then she gasped: her axe, butcher's knife, scissors, and dagger were all embedded into a huge rubber spider.

Konan, face burning with rage and embarassment, picked up her weapons, (she had cracked the shower, but she didn't care too much, and the very much dead rubber spider. She flung the weapons into the bottom drawer, hiding them under a load of socks, and tossed the rubber spider into the garbage. Then she plotted her revenge on her new 'roomies'. After unpacking her bags, and examining the uniforms (pretty black pinafores with dark grey tights and pale grey collared t-shirt, with the school crest on ( a black raven on a black tree with a white moon and a grey cloud), she took out her was what had made her baggage heavy enough to be transported on it's own: although she knew that the school supplied origami paper, she had brought her own for purposes like this.

She opened her door, looked down the tiny hallway (she forsaw bumping into people in the future) and stepped out, already in her pale grey nightdress and black leggings with grey socks and black bunny slippers. She was amused that her entire wardrobe matched the school's. Ironic. She had replaced her paper hair accessory, and was now sitting on the floor, readying herself and her energy for what was to come. She wasn't tired enough for sleep, despite it being three am. She was ready to scare the shit out of the first boy out of his room. She began folding her paper at an amazing speed, feeling it come alive in her hands. She smirked as her project began to take form; she was gonna get the last laugh this time.

The next morning, Konan brushed her hair, put it half-up in its usual messy bun, adjusted her paper flower, put on the school uniform (she had already shortened it slightly, added pale grey and black lace to the bottom hem, painstakingly painted white flowers onto the black pinafore's buttons, and had created artistic runs in the tights. She checked herself in the mirror to make sure that she wasn't totally unattractive (she was capable of looking like a real zombie), and she headed out the door, her black and grey flowered bag over her shoulder, her schedule tucked inside of it safely, along with her supplies and books. Konan took one last look at her artwork before tromping loudly down the hall, making sure to wake up the boys at the ungodly hour of six in the morning.

She heard sevearl moans, swears, and other irritated-boys-in-early-morning sounds, and was amused as she opened the door into the larger hall. Immediately she was thankful that she'd thought to leave early. At around eight thirty, there would be at least fifty boys tromping around here, talking, laughing, swearing, fighting...urgh. It all made her happy she was a girl, and unhappy that she would be staying with such unintelligent brutes. Her experiences with real boys were minamal, but memorable enough to warn her away from them. She walked quietly through the empty hall, making her way to somewhere she hoped she could hide unitl breakfast.

Meanwhile, Hidan was swearing.

"Fucking bitch! Why'd she have to stomp through there like some kind of fucking hippo! I bet she's fat!" he was seething. Deidara was in Hidan's room too, having used the adjoining door.

"I don't know about you, but I think that she's paying us back for the spider." he mumbled, and Hidan vaguely wondered if the blonde was really awake.

"Paying us back? That asswipe bitch can just fuck herself if she thinks that I'm gonna stand for this kind of shit." he said angrily, throwing open the door and stepping out, going to shake Pain and Itachi. Then he saw her. She was lying on the floor in a broken kind of way, the kind of way that makes people fear the worst. Her blue hair was spread out, her legs and arms were splayed, she was lying face-down in a puddle of horrible, red blood...and there was a huge butcher's knife between her shoulder blades...Hidan's eyes widened.

"!" Immediately, the doors flew open. There were a few more yells, Deidara fell over in shock, and Hidan was beside himself with horror and fright. Then Itachi snorted.

"You idiots." That shut everybody up. Pain looked at the body.

"She's made of paper, you freaks." Hidan jabbed the body with his toe, and gasped in indignation and outrage when it folded over itself slightly. There was an unmistakable rustle of paper.


"That BITCH! I'm gonna fuckin' KILL her!" Hidan roared, and he was still roaring over two and a half hours later when then left the room, locked it, and were walking to breakfast.

"You've said that at least four hundred times, Hidan." Itachi said irritably.

"Yeah, well, you know what? Fuck you." Hidan retorted. The banged on the door of the other Year 5 boys. A scowling red-head opened it.

"Oh, it's you." he said, running a hand through his dark red hair.

"Hey Sasori. Getting up any time soon?" Pain asked, amused: Sasori was still in his pyjama bottoms.

"Fuck that. What the hell was all that noise last night? First there's a sound like a banshee, and then-" Hidan was laughing. "That was the bitch who's staying in our room. We put a rubber spider in her fucking shower, and-"

"She has a shower?" Sasori exclaimed.

"I know!" the entire troupe of boys exclaimed indignantly: everybody else has to use the changeroom showers, and she gets her own? "I think Shizune said that it's compensation for having to stay with boys." Itachi said. Sasori smirked: it was famous that he had once made out with Shizune when she was drunk. It was a school legend, in fact.

"Yeah, okay. So first she goes and scares the crap out of us, and then Hidan-" he looked at the platinum blonde, who grinned. "-Hidan starts screaming like a little girl. And then you all start yelling, and then there was the swearing..." Sasori was laughing. Deidara rolled his eyes.

"The girl made a seriously realistic corpse of herself out of paper." Sasori smirked.

"Oh, really?" he asked, like he didn't believe him. Deidara ran a hand through his long dark blonde hair, and Sasori watched him. Itachi coughed, and Sasori jumped. Yelling to his roommates over his shoulder to get out of bed, he retreated to get dressed. The boys from Konan's room leaned against the wall.

"So...anybody know her name?" Pain asked. They all shook their heads. The pierced-up boy rolled his many-irised eyes. Typical. They get a girl in their room, and nobody knows her name. What a way to start. He smirked to himself, remembering the 'corpse'. She was smart, he would give her that much. And if that corpse was of her, than she had pretty hair. And good taste in weapons. His train of thought was interrupted by the rest of the boys in his year trooping out of their room; Kisame, tall and blue, Kakuzu, stitched-up, and Sasori, with his dark-red hair and typical smirk.

They all walked to the huge doors, discussing the new girl. They'd have to test her out, that was for sure. It would suck if she was just like Ino-bitch. And it would also suck if she was butt-ugly. Pain wondered if she would have a piercing. They all walked into the huge lunch hall, grabbed plates, piled them up with food, and sat down at their usual table.

In the meantime, Konan had taken an apple, toast, and a glass of orange juice, and had sat down at a table, taking out her origami paper and was absentmindedly folding flowers and boats and heads and hands and butterflys and bears and castles while she thought and ate. She was soon joined by a chattering gaggle of girls. The one who sat next to her asked her name and where she was staying. When she said she was staying with the boys, all the girls immediately stopped talking and stared, scooting their chairs closer and all began asking questions all at once. The one sitting next to her had powder blue eyes, pale skin, and pale blonde hair that hid her right eye and was so long it probably went past her butt if it was let out of it's high pony tail.

"You're staying with boys? Oooh...which ones?"

"I don't know their names. I haven't met them yet." The girl looked a little disappointed, but only for a second. "I'm Ino. You're new here, aren't you?" she asked. Konan was somehow starting to dislike her. She seemed to project a kind of you should know me already aura, and she didn't like it much.

"Yeah. I came yesterday night." She said, biting noisily into her apple, and ending the conversation. Or so she thought. Ino waved over a friend of hers, who promptly sat down in front of Konan, smiling and probably eager for the latest gossip.

"This is Sakura." Ino said. Sakura said hi, and Konan smiled around her apple.

"This is Konan. She's new, in fifth year, and she's staying with the guys. Not sure which ones, but they're definately in fifth too." Ino said quickly, and Sakura's eyes widened. She had bubblegum pink hair and turquoise eyes. Pretty, thought Konan. But still, not the kind of person she liked, going by first impressions. She seemed nicer than Ino, though. "You're staying with boys? Why?" Sakura asked curiously. Konan put down her apple.

"I signed up a little late, and my dad signed a form that basically means throw her where there's room. So I'm in an extra room in the boy's dorm. At least I have a shower." Ino stared.

"You have your own shower?" she asked in and O M G kind of voice. Konan nodded.

"Wow. Luck-eee." she said, making the word into two distinct syllables.

"You're in the year above us, so you haven't seen him yet," Sakura began, gesturing to a boy at a crammed table across the room. Konan looked, trying to see who she was talking about.

"...That's Sasuke Uchiha. Major hottie in our year." Ino finished, staring over at him. Konan followed her intense gaze to a boy who was facing away from them (probably on purpose) with black hair and pale skin. His hair seemed to stick up in a shape that (to Konan) looked kind of like the wrong end of a duck. But she supposed that he was probably cool in a quiet, look-at-me-and-die way. Just judging by his looks and how he seemed to be pointedly be ignoring the two girls she was sitting with, no matter how loudly they talked about him.

"So," Ino said, tossing her long hair and thwacking Konan in the back with it (Konan officially didn't like her anymore). "What have you done to your uni so far?" she asked. Konan supposed that she was talking about her clothes.

"Well...not that much." Sakura gestured for her to stand up. Their colorful eyes travelled along her body, up and down. She felt a little silly when they told her to turn around.

"Well?" she asked, a little sheepishly.

"I think it's pretty." said Sakura. "Well, I like the ribbons, and the lace..." Ino said, gesturing to the black ribbons Konan had added to the short sleeves and the waist and the criss-crossing lace at the bottom.

"You're pretty conservative, huh?" Ino asked, and Konan suddenly wondered what they were wearing.

"Well...I guess...what did you two do?" Ino stood up, and twirled around, the expression on her face plainly expecting every male around to suddenly get an erection just by glancing over. Konan almost coughed up her apple. All of Shizune's warnings about butt, breast and belly showing uniforms seemed to have stemmed from Ino's dress. Her skirt was very short, and she had cut a deep V in the front, straight through both pinafore and collared shirt, so you could get a hint of whatever was under there. She had turned the pinafore into a top and skirt by cutting a chunk out of the middle. The bottom half of the shirt was missing too, and seemed to be replaced by what looked suspiciously like extremely sheer grey fabric that showed stomach.

"Of course, Shizune and Big Boobs wouldn't let me have a bare stomach..." Ino was still complaining about her 'problems' by the time Konan asked to see Sakura's. Sakura's wasn't nearly as bad as Ino. She almost looked normal. Her skirt was cut shorter, but still at a reasonable length. She had torn the short sleeves off of her collar shirt, so it was just a collar, and she had tied a thick pink ribbon around her waist, to show off her slim torso. There was a pink flower embroidered onto the pocket of her dress.

"I like it. It's very pretty, especially the flower." Konan said, trying to be nice. Sakura smiled.

"Thanks. I like the flowers on your buttons." Konan had forgotten about those. Suddenly Sakura started forwards, staring at Konan.

"What?" Konan asked, confused.

"Do you have...a piercing!" Sakura asked, almost in horror. Konan was suddenly feeling defensive. Ino spun around.

"A piercing? Why would you get one there?" She asked, pointing beneath Konan's lip.

"It's a labret. I like it. I have another on my belly button, and I have a tattoo." Konan said proudly. Who cares if these airheads like her or not? She was pretty sure that she'd find somebody who liked piercings around. There had to be somebody she could be friends with...Ino and Sakura had faded into a conversation about Sasuke and all they knew or suspected about various people, Konan probably included. Konan finished her juice, put away her tray, and left for origami class at the bell.


After her first class, Konan liked St Misery much much better. The teacher was really nice (and actually wore paper!) and had greatly praised Konan on her 'amazing ability to manipulate paper almost subconsciously'. Her name was Miss Kurenai, and she was officially Konan's favourite teacher. During break, Konan was asked to stay behind, and Kurenai discussed various paper making techniques with her. Konan rushed to drawing, trying not to be late. She bumped into someone in the doorway.

She looked up (he was so tall she only came up to his collarbones) and saw a boy with odd purple eyes with lots of rings...what were those?...medium length spiky orange hair, and a lot of piercings. He looked down at her.

"Sorry." she said, averting her eyes, and practically jumped into the classroom. The teacher looked at her silently.

"You're Konan, right?" she nodded. "Well, just go to the empty seat while I take attendance..." She looked around, and saw an empty seat next to...another empty seat. Wow. A table to herself. She sighed and sat down, fingering the run on her tights as the teacher began calling out names.

He had most of his face covered by a black mask, and he had long, sticky-up grey hair, although he seemed pretty young. She immediately liked his relaxed tone and attitude. She heard him call out various names she didn't pay attention to;

"Hinata...here...Temari...here...Neji...here...Sasori..."

"Here, unfortunately."

" Detention, Akasuna."

Konan looked up to see a casually handsome guy with dark red hair scowl as the guy...girl? beside him laughed quietly. The other guy had long dark blonde hair, styled slightly like Ino's but with a half-ponytail, and it looked WAY better on him. Kakashi was still taking attendance.

"Konan...here...Deidara...here...Pain's here..." he said, not even looking up to check. Pain? Weird. Konan was doodling on the first page of her sketchbook when Kakashi announced that as it was the day before a holiday, they might as well take a holiday, and goof off. Konan was surprised, but not upset at all. No, she needed sleep now. She felt her eyes get heavier and heavier as she scribbled the shape of a ball gown onto her paper. In a few moments, she was resting her head on her arms, and was sleeping on her desk, completely unaware that someone else had just sat down next to her.

Pain looked at the girl who was sleeping next to him on her desk. It was the girl he'd bumped into on the way to his locker. He'd forgotten his book, but then, seeing how Kakashi had decided it was a holiday, it looked like he wouldn't need it. He watched the blue-haired girl sleep. She had a very pretty face, he decided. Or, what he could see of it was pretty. She was wearing dark blue eyeshadow, and she had impossibly long, black eyelashes that cast a shadow onto her cheeks. He looked at her mouth, and noted with satisfaction that she had a labret. That makes it one girl in the school with taste. He supposed that she was one of the new people at the school. He didn't realise he was still looking at her when she blinked and raised her head with a quiet yawn. She stopped mid-yawn, and stared at him, apparently only just realizing that he was there. Pain had to bit his tongue to not laugh. Her face was too funny.

Konan froze. A boy. The boy. The boy with the cool eyes and piercings and bright orange hair. He was sitting next to her. And she was frozen in mid-yawn! She shut her mouth with a snap, and looked away, cheeks burning. This is why she hates boys: she gets stuck looking stupid, and bad things always happen to her when she talks to them. She could still feel his odd eyes on her.

"Are you new here?" he asked finally. Konan looked up, surprised. He had a nice voice. The kind of voice that was easygoing, and nice to listen to.

"Yeah..." she said, not sure what he wanted to know.

"You're in fifth year, aren't you?" he asked. Konan nodded. "I'm Pain." he said. She wondered if she should introduce herself. Probably, but...He interrupted her thoughts. "You know, when somebody says their name, it's generally normal to say your own, too." Konan instantly felt stupid, and she knew that Pain was grinning at her, clearly amused by her stupidity.

"I know that." she said, and continued to stare down at her nails, which she'd painted black with white flowers and red bloodstains...very difficult. She'd used up nearly ten toothpicks getting the blood right. Pain followed her gaze.

"How did you do that?" he asked curiously. Konan looked up, completely surprised that this pierced-up boy was asking about nailpolish.

"Oh, with a lot of toothpicks, and more swearing." she said, embarassed. She almost fell off of her chair with shock when he laughed. She had made a boy laugh. Konan supposed that miracles really must happen. She stared at him as he laughed, and she suddenly realized that he was cute. No...hot. konan almost blushed, thinking that he could read minds, because he laughed harder. People were starting to look at them now, he was laughing so loudly. Konan looked straight down at her lace-up black boots, sincerely wishing that she could sink into the floor. Finally, Pain calmed down. Konan looked up at him, half-accusingly.

"Why were you laughing so much? It wasn't funny at all!" she said, weirded out. Pain was still grinning.

"Your face. You looked so funny." Perfect, Konan thought. My face was hilarious. So much so that he couldn't breathe for laughing. She was glaring at her feet again. Pain looked confused. "Hey, you were making a funny face! Your normal face isn't funny, it's..." Konan looked up at him. He looked slightly at a loss for words. Konan was still confused: what? What what what? What the heck goes on in boys' minds? Is he crazy? Am I crazy? She smiled slightly, knowing the answer to that question.

Pain was saved from accidentally saying that he thought she was pretty by, surprisingly, Sasori, who slapped him on the back, and sat on his desk.

"Hey, Pain. Who's this new hottie?" Pain glanced at the blue-haired girl next to him before answering. He almost laughed again: she looked flabbergasted at being called a hottie, and even more shocked that they were both looking at her, so she fixed her eyes determinedly on her boots.

"I don't know her name. She's new, and in our year." Pain said simply. Sasori looked at the bluenette (lol).

"What's your name, gorgeous?" he asked, his seductively soft voice willing her to answer. Konan looked up, and Pain suddenly realized that her eyes were a beautiful amber. Pure amber. A brilliant, sexy, adorable shade of orage-brown. Amber. He caught himself before she realized he was staring at her.

"You may call me Miss Amega, Mr Akasuna." she said sweetly. Pain burst out laughing as Sasori looked stunned. Konan was almost as stunned as he was. Why the hell did she say that? Another boy came over. It was the one with long dark blonde hair. He had pretty, blue slanted eyes and lightly tanned skin.

"What's so funny?" He asked, grabbing an empty chair and swinging it around to sit on.

"This is Deidara." Pain said to Konan. She nodded with a shy smile.

"What's your name?" Deidara asked. Sasori spoke for her, grinning.

"Miss Amega. She's new here." Deidara looked puzzled.

"Okay...so what classes are you in?" he asked, plainly understanding that there was an inside joke. Konan grabbed her schedule and showed them.

"Cool, you're in sculpture, painting, and drawing with me, un." Deidara said, and Konan smiled: she liked this one already. Sasori examined her schedule.

"Let's see...you've got gym with me, Pain, and Hidan every day...then drawing, obviously...metalshop...and that's it." he said, handing her schedule to Pain. Konan supposed that these were her new friends, since they were the only ones she was actually beginning to like. Pain scanned her list.

"Okay, drawing, gym, metalshop and sculpture." he said. Konan smiled.

"That's nice. You guys are all in fifth, right?" she asked, and they all nodded. Sasori was frowning a little.

"How old are you, Miss Amega? You don't look sixteen." Konan looked at him.

"I'm not sixteen. I'm fifteen." They all looked at her oddly. She explained.

"I'm born in October." There was a big Ohhhhh like it was some kind of amazing revelation.

"So you're a Libra." Sasori said. Konan nodded. "So...are you...Diplomatic and urbane, romantic and charming, easygoing and sociable and idealistic and peaceable?" he asked.

"What do you think?" she asked, and he grinned. Deidara shrugged.

"Well," he said "there's bad stuff, too, un. Like, are you really indeicsive? Super gullible or, flirtacious?" he asked, and Konan laughed for the first time since she'd arrived at the school. They looked at her, grinning: she had a funny laugh. ( It sounded just like the one at the beginning of 'Wannabe' by the Spice Girls. Not that they listened to that of course.)

"Do you really think I'm flirtacious?" she asked, and they shook their heads.

"No way. You're not Ino-bitch." Sasori said, and she smirked, remembering Ino's outfit.

"Well," she began, startling them all: this was the first time she'd started a conversation. "I was born about four weeks early. So I technically should be a Scorpio. So that's...determined, forceful, emotional, powerful and exciting. Also resentful, jealous, compulsive, obsessive, and secretive." she remembered. That didn't really fit her much better than a libra.

"Well, do you think it's better being a crazy ex or a flirty whore?" Sasori asked. Konan weighed the pros and cons.

"Well, I'd much rather be the one beating the asshole who dumped me with a crowbar than the one who gets laid in the guy's bathroom." she said, and the guys all laughed.

"Remind me never to let you loose with a crowbar." Pain murmured, and she grinned. Finally, the bell rang. Pain asked if she wanted to eat lunch with them and their friends, and she accepted, happy that she could eat with people who weren't known as Ino-bitch and Suck-her-ass. She followed them into the lunchroom, listening and laughing as they warned her about teachers and asked if she thought some guys were hot-or-not.

"Not." she said immediately when they pointed at a shortish guy with spiky, almost yellow hair. They laughed, while Pain said quietly to her that that guy was Naruto Uzumaki, and he liked Sakura. Konan looked at Naruto, and when he turned around, she saw that he had rather nice blue eyes. She decided that he could be hot later, when he grew a bit and stuff.

They all grabbed some lunch (Konan took another apple, juice, and a vegetarian subway) and they all sat down at a long table, which was already occupied by who Konan could only suppose, were their other friends. There was just enough room. Konan sat between Pain and Deidara, and across from a guy with long black hair that was tied in a pony tail, lovely (yet creepy) red eyes, and bags under his eyes.

"Yo Pain! Who's the lady?" a voice called across the table. Konan looked at her feet, and then mentally smacked herself. If she was going to make friends, she was going to have to stop acting like a baby! She looked up at who had spoken; it was a really tall blue guy with blue hair and shark teeth. Interesting.

"That's Kisame." Pain said quietly.

"This is Miss Amega, Kisame. Don't give her a crowbar." Pain said, and Sasori, Deidara and Konan laughed. So far, Konan had decided that she liked Pain best.

"Hey, we should all introduce ourselves to little Miss over here." Deidara said, and everybody laughed.

"Pain."

"Sasori"

"Hidan" ( a tall, muscular platinum blonde with reddish-purple eyes)

"Kisame"

"Kakuzu" (a weird-looking guy with stitches all over him that looked like they were what held his form together, and odd green eyes.)

"Itachi" (the guy with black hair and red eyes)

"Deidara"

"Miss Amega." Konan said, and Pain grinned. She looked up at him (she really had to look up; most of her height was in her legs, not her torso) and saw him look at her.

"You have a lot of piercings." she told him, and he, and those that had heard, laughed.

"Yes. Yes I do." he said.

"Is that your only piercing?" Sasori asked. Konan shook her head.

"I have a bellybutton piercing, and..well it doesn't count, but I've got a tattoo." There was a collective Ooooohhhhh. Konan smiled.

"Where?" asked Deidara. "Well, it's pretty big. It goes over my shoulders, and down to like halfway down my back..ish." she was trying to explain the large, intricate butterfly wings that she'd gotten the year previously.

"Sex-ee." Konan didn't need to look. She sipped her juice.

"I'm glad you think so, Mr Akasuna. I'm also glad that you'll never see it." she said, and the boys laughed.

"Never ever?" Sasori teased. Konan gave him a look that said What do you think? The bell rang, and they put away their garbage and trays, and headed to gym. Pain, Sasori, Deidara and Hidan all had the same class and the same teacher. They separated to change, and as Konan stripped and put on the grey t-shirt and black shorts, Ino and Sakura came up to her, both smiling.

"Hey Konan!"

"Hey!" she said. Ino raised her eyebrows.

"So...you're sure becoming a favourite with the boys in your year...some of them are pretty hot, too." she said. Konan frowned.

"Oh. I didn't really notice..." Sakura laughed.

"You're funny!"

Ino waved her hand to shush her friend.

"But, really, people are starting to think that you're flirting with them, and that your a gang banger because you're sleeping with the boys." Ino said in a stage whisper. Konan's eyes widened in irritation.

"How could they know that I'm sleeping in the same room as the boys? I only told you two." Konan said accusingly. Ino rolled her eyes.

"Please. You're not that stupid, Konan. Word travels fast around here. We were probably overheard." Konan was seething.

"You-"

"Girls, hurry up! All the boys are ready! Chop chop!"

Konan didn't get a chance to finish her angry reply as she and all the other girls left the changeroom. They went and sat down next to the boys. It was a mixed class of fifth year and fourth year, so Sasuke and Naruto and the other fifth year boys were all there. Konan went and sat next to Pain and the others. She realized that her face must show how angry she was, because Pain raised his eyebrows at her, and Deidara looked over, concerned.

They didn't get a chance to ask her what was up, because the teacher shouted; "Six laps! Go, go, go GOOOOO!" They all jumped to their feet and started running. Pain was fasted, followed by some of the other guys, then Konan and Sasori, Hidan a little ahead. Ino-bitch and Sakura were at the back, probably going slow enough to talk, and to see Sasuke every time he lapped them.

"What happened?" Sasori asked on their third lap.

"Ino and Sakura said everybody thinks that I'm gonna sleep with all the boys in the dorm. But it's not that pissed me off. Ino actually was pretending that it wasn't her who told everybody I'm sleeping in the guy's dorm." Sasori almost tripped.

"What? Don't tell me...you're the one sleeping in our dorm?" Konan frowned.

"What? Are you one of the assholes I'm rooming with?" she asked, and Sasori suddenly rememebered the paper-corpse...Hidan said that she had blue hair! Konan was trying to glare at him while she was laughing. Sasori laughed, too. "No, but I'm in the connecting room with you guys."

"Seriously? Are you the one that put the rubber spider in my shower?" she asked, and Sasori laughed.

"Well, it was actually Hidan and the others, in Deidara's room. I'm in the other room, with Kakuzu, and Kisame. The doors connect, though."

"No way. Who else is my room?" Sasori was grinning; at least she wasn't butt-ugly or a total bitch. He might actually have fun having a connecting door to her room.

"Hidan, Itachi, and Pain!"

"No way! Did you see the body I made?" she asked, wondering if they'd fallen for it. Deidara laughed.

"Yeah! Hidan almost pissed himself. That was funny! Sorry about the spider, it was for fun." Konan grinned.

"Well, you got lucky. I'm arachnophobic. I'm just glad I didn't pass out or throw up or something." Sasori looked shocked.

"That sucks. But they didn't know you were arachnophobic. They just thought you'd be scared, 'cause you're a girl." Konan raised an eyebrow skeptically.

"What about Hidan? At least I didn't almost piss myself." Sasori laughed, and then they sat down again, having finished their laps. Sasori grabbed Pain's arm, and beckoned to Hidan.

"Guess what? Miss Amega's the one staying in your room." Konan watched Pain and Hidan's faces. They looked shocked. Then, Pain looked amused, and Hidan looked thunderstruck.

"You mean you're the bitch who made a fucking corpse outside my room?" Konan smirked.

"And you're the bitch who put the spider in my shower?" she asked, feigning surprise and horror. Hidan laughed.

"Jashin, that was fucking hilarious. You screamed like a fucking banshee." Pain laughed.

"She's arachnophobic." Sasori said. Hidan immediately fell silent.

"You serious? Damn, it sucks to be you! The school's full of those bastards." Konan blanched, and Pain grinned at her.

"Don't worry. We've only ever seen one that could poison you." Konan felt ill. Quite ill.

Suddenly the teacher, a muscular man with a black goatee and hair and a cigarette case in his pocket said; "Into groups of four! It's volleyball this month!"

Konan was paired up with Pain, because Hidan hates losing, and Sasori's the best at volleyball. After sheepishly admitting that she'd never played before, Hidan had rushed to the other side of the court and had gotten Sasori in a choke hold, making him be his teammate. Pain walked over to her and said that if the ball comes, to just put her fists together and hit it off her wrists, or to smack it...or something. Konan wasn't too nervous, because the class tournament wouldn't be for four weeks. She stood in the front of the court, hoping that the ball would always fly over her head to Pain. Hidan started, and bumped the ball it damn it, it was coming right for her.

She closed her eyes, put her wrists together, brought them up, wincing as the ball hit them with a loud and painful smack. She still had her eyes tight shut when somebody shouted for her to look out. She looked up. Evidentally she had hit the ball straight up into the air really hard. It had hit the ceiling and was falling down towards her. Really really fast. It was only two feet above her head. And then it hit her. She fell over backwards as the ball rebounded off of her head and hit Hidan in the face. She lay on the ground as she heard Sasori and Pain laughing themselves silly. She sat up, rubbing her head, and looked around. Almost everybody was staring at her. Ino was laughing. Pain, still laughing, helped her up.

She had just started laughing as well, when Ino said in a very carrying whisper:"See, I told you! I bet Pain's getting laid tonight. He's probably on a waiting list, though." Konan snapped her head around, glaring at Ino with all the ferocity she could muster. Pain looked murderous. For the first time since she'd met him, Konan was kind of scared of him.

Hidan just smirked, and said loudly to Sasori;"Hey, Sasori, remember that time Ino couldn't fucking walk for a week after riding all the guys she could find who were drunk on Halloween?" Sasori grinned.

"Oh yeah, I remember. Didn't Shikamaru say that she almost raped him, she was so horny?" He replied, just as loudly.

Konan smiled; she was glad that she had friends now. Not only were they nice, and funny, and just her type, they were also the coolest guys. Not Ino cool, not superficial be-hot-or-you're-out cool, it was the kind of cool that made the other guys kind of respect them, because if they didn't they'd probably get their asses kicked and laughed at. Konan sneaked a glance at Ino and Sakura. Ino looked livid, Sakura edging away from her slightly. Sasuke was smirking, and muttering something to his friend. Probably about how she had tried to rape him too.

The rest of the volleyball game continued a little more normally. Konan jumped and tried to spike a ball, and missed Hidan's balls by three inches. He swore at her loudly, laughing as well because it was so funny. Sasori and Hidan beat them, but not my that much, mostly due to Pain's good reflexes. He high-fived her when she scored a point, and Konan grinned at him. She decided that she was actually going to have a great time at St Misery. No matter how unfortunate the name of the school was.