A oneshot that I've been thinking about for some time. No, its not Yuri; just friendship. I hope you all enjoy!
Btw, its AU. Also, to me, a loveseat=2. sofa=3.
EDIT-NOTE -(AUGUST 24)- I would like to thank "Nobody" an anonymous (sp?) reviewer who helped out with a grammarical mistake. Thanks, darling! 3 And since you're already reading this, please read my Crossover idea and vote on the poll on my profile. Thank you, and enjoy the one-shot.
Disclaimer: I, EmpressOfEvilBunnies, do not own the anime or manga series Naruto. Nor do I own MTV. Or Kohl's. Or Floyd Mayweather. Or Cribs (The show). Or Betty Crocker's Double Fudge Hershey's Brownie Mix. The TV series 'Busted' is pure imagination. (If you're stupid, I just said that it wasn't real)
***Busted: Special Edition***
The make believe TV series Busted is a show that generally hangs out with a police officer while he does his job and "Busts" people. It can range from speeding, drunk teens to a machine gun and baseball bat infested burglary at Kohl's. All they do is catch all the action on tape and not die. It's usual title is Busted, but Special Edition is added whenever (you guessed it) the particular episode went out of control. So the crazy and action-filled ones are Special Edition. In this One-Shot, the camera crew tag along a ride to a house that presumably held two law-breaking troublemakers, and our well known besties are the stars! Some little hints: It's only one guy(He's the camera man and the spokesperson). The show is LIVE.
***Busted: Special Edition***
San Francisco, California - Akatsuki Gang Base - TV Room
Almost all the inhabitants of the three story luxury home were settled comfortably in the air conditioned room. An extra fan was placed in the corner of the large room. There were four couches in all; a corner couch that would fit two people of their size comfortably on each side, three if needed. A loveseat, sofa and an armchair. All of which were black with red pillows. They were all watching MTV on their 152 inch plasma screen with surround sound. As Floyd wrapped up his tour by showing off his awesome rides, Cribs ended and boring credits began. Soon, after the commercials finished, a man's face was incredibly close to the camera and he introduced the show.
"This time, on Busted: Special Edition, we've got a couple of gremlins in Miami, Florida." The camera panned to a burly police officer, who looked like he had one too many donuts on his last break. It seemed that they were in a car, the camera man was in the passenger seat and the cop was driving down a street that looked very familiar to the blonde artist that was sprawled on the loveseat.
"Hey, un. Isn't that..."spotting a store that he was also familiar with he finally concluded that they were in a particular neighberhood.
"Yo, Hidan! I need you to get in here, un!" Deidara called out. The others in the room sent him looks of confusion. Said Jashinist emerged from the doorway with a half-eaten apple in his hand.
"What?" He demanded grumpily.
"Recognize anything, un?" The silver haired hunk squinted at the screen trying to unsolve the puzzle that was given to him by his long time acquaintance. Then, it finally clicked.
"Shit, isn't that-!"
"Yeah! It is!" They shared a look.
"What are you two talking about?" Kisame curiuosly asked. What was going on?
"You know how we both have obnoxious sisters who happen to live in Miami and-" Deidara began, being cut off by the only one who understood at the moment.
"-and do every single piece of shit they fucking come up with together ever since they were potty-trained?"
They got a choir of "Oh"-s as everyone else finally got it. Konan, the only person that wasn't in the room, entered some seconds earlier.
"So," Madara (not Tobi, no mask) began, "you're sure that your mischievous sisters are the ones who are about to be busted on national television?" Both of them nodded; they were pretty sure that their sisters were the ones that got neck deep in shit.
(On The TV)
"Officer Henry, would you mind telling our viewers what these rascals have done to catch the Department's eye?"
The round man took a right turn at a green traffic light, cleared his throat then finally answered, "Well, they illegally spray painted the entrances of many stores and buildings, loaded closed schools with helpless children - all whom were under the age of eight -, harrassed a man -who was their teacher (guess who)- by SillyString-ing and Tp-ing his house and tieing him to a street light after or before knocking him out cold. Detectives believe the object used was a frying pan."
The cameraman let out a low whistle, "Whoa, they did all that?" The car came to a stop in front of a very, very well known house. Holy cow, this wasn't looking too good. But, they stayed in the car as the police man continued to talk.
"And more: They broke into and robbed an old, blind woman's home. They stole her cat, twenty-two dollars and a majority of her left socks. They destroyed a resturant's kitchen by setting it on fire. Picked off all the apples and pears from a man's backyard. Somehow -and for some reason I don't understand- unscrewed and took the green slide from the local neighberhood park, poked a hole in every tire on every car on X street, and -finally- used paintball guns to burgle 31 boxes of Betty Crocker's Double Fudge Hershey's Brownies from Wal-Mart."
Everone turned to stare at Hidan and Deidara with either a shocked expression, open mouth or a smirk.
"How do you know it was them? It could've been anyone."
"They left a drawing at every crime scene that leads to their identity, the fingerprints found on some of the crime scenes and the video from Wal-Mart also point to them."
"A drawing? What do you mean?"
Pulling out something from his pocket, the supposed crime catcher showed the camera a drawing of a pink pig eating grass under a cherry blossom tree. It was obviously a scan of the real thing which what seemed to be drawn with crayons. The fat dude explained what the picture had to do with their names. (If you are stupid, I shall help you: Pig=Ino Tree=Sakura)
"Mhmm...what are you gonna do to them, Officer Henry?"
"They're still not legal adults so we can't really sentence them or anything. But I'm just gonna rile them up; scare them a bit."
"And if things don't go as expected?" Both men opened the doors of the vehichle and got out.
"They both seem to have older siblings that are over 18 years of age; we'll have to bring them into the situation if something bizarre happens." Said legal adults groaned simultaneously.
Approaching the house, the camera man continued to ask questions, "So, our culprits live together?"
The huskier man in the uniform nodded, "At least, from what we've dug up, most of the time; they seem to be very close."
"No, best friends. Females. 16 and 7 months (Sakura), and 16 and 1 month (Ino)"
"Alright." They reached the door and the officer took a look at the camera before knocking on the door.
"Fuck! 5 more minutes and the pizza would've been free! Don't open the door, Ino." Cried a voice from inside.
"I don't think the pizza dude's gonna wait for five minutes; anyways the pizza'll get cold." It was a different voice this time.
"That's why there's a microwave. That little shit deserves to wait outside. Pass me one fourth glass of milk."
Sigh, "Look Sakura, I'llpay. Ok?"
...Silence... Henry knocked again, rougher this time.
Loud groan, "Fine. But Jashin won't be pleased!"
The door finally swung open. The curvacious blonde who had opened it still hadn't looked in their direction; she was facing a door way to her left. Finally turning to them, her blue eyes widened and they noticed a smudge of chocolaty brown on her cheek and all over her apron.
"Ha, you and your sister look alot alike; and yet she represents her gender more than you do yours, Brat." Sasori earned a glare for that.
"Ino Yamanaka?" She hesitantly nodded, "Where is Sakura Haruno?"
Suddenly, a pink haired chick with a wooden spoon covered in chocolate walked up to them, "Who's asking?" She raised an elegant pink eyebrow.
"I am; Officer Henry Willi-"
"AND YOU'RE BUSTED!" Both of the girls and the cop turned to look at him.
"Hi, mom! Hi, Dei!" Ino smiled and waved enthusiastically. Sakura glared at the camera.
"Ahem. You two are in trouble for..." the heavy man went ranting about all the fun things Sakura and her bitch had done the past month. Crap, they were probably going to press charges or something. Ino sent her a wary look.
Her emerald gaze danced between the camera, the officer and the spoon in her hand. Repeatedly.
"Time to use our ass-pounding ninja moves?" It was a whisper but the camera caught Ino's sentence anyway. The police man did not and kept going on and on about something no one was really paying attention to. Sakura faintly nodded then out of fucking nowhere bonked the camera with her wooden spoon with so much force it blacked out for a second before going back to normal and almost causing him to drop it. And as quick as lightning Ino slammed the door in their shocked faces.
"What do we do now?"
"Emergency Exit! NOW!"
And then a fire extinguisher flew out of the window right next to the door and the girls escaped from the window right next to the door. Ino picked up the fire extinguisher and sprayed them both with the white foam, isolating them for a few seconds before Sakura -the obviously crazy one- snatched the red item from her hands and fucking threw it at the officer, aiming for and successfully hitting his big belly. But they didn't stick around to watch because Ino tugged on the pinkette's tanktop and they both fled. Since Henry was -without a doubt- not getting up anytime soon, if his groans were any sign, the cameraman took after them.
The pretty blonde looked back, "Holy penguin poop! He's after us!" she wailed hopelessly.
The maniac stole a glance at him, too.
"Fuck off and die in a hole, whore!" She flipped him a bird while sprinting.
"Don't get him mad, stupid!"
"He started it!"
"What the hell did he do?"
"What did he do? YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT THE UGLY-ASS RHINO SHIT FUCKING DID TO MAKE ME MAD? He didn't bring the pizza, his camera didn't break, he didn't fuck off, neither did he die in a hole and he's still coming after us! And you're asking me WHAT HE DID TO MAKE ME MAD?" They were running and arguing at the same time, all the while ignoring his calls for them to stop.
Ino let out a loud and long scream of frustration, and suddenly Sakura stopped causing Ino to halt too.
"Sakura!" she hissed. The camera man was catching up, now.
"No! No one makes my best friend pissed off and gets away with it! This bitch is gonna fucking regret the day his momma shat him out!" Abruptly, he stopped and tried to reason with the approaching red faced teen who was currently cracking her knuckles. However, before she could punch the daylight out of him three police cars came from seemingly nowhere and in-shape officers pointed their guns at them.
"Put down your weapons, and slowly put your hands behind your head!"
"Son of a bitch called back up? Amma go shove my foot up his fat ass next time I see him!"
"Forget that! Just run! RUN, YOU MORONIC BITCH! RUN!" And run they did; on top of a random car to get away and into an alley between two houses. Of course, the more fit cops came after them along with the camera man who was up front. They crossed a road without looking twice, pushed down garbage cans to get them to slow down and led them to an empty neighberhood. They were all exhausted, and the "Good Guys" were surprised that the girls were still running.
"Ino?" Sakura panted out; her mouth was dry.
"Yeah?" Her beautiful blue-eyed friend seemed to be quite tired too.
"Do you love me?"
"Will you love me no matter what? And know that you will always be my bitch?"
"Good." And all of a sudden Sakura's foot shot out and effectively tripped her partner-in-crime, "I love you, too!"
"Sakura! You two-timing, hurtful, good-for-nothing, big foreheaded bitch!" The assaulted girl rasped out from her position on the asphalt, being hauled away by the police, too weak to struggle at the moment.
"SORRY BABE! I'll make it up to you!" And as she had planned, Ino falling behind had slowed them down by miles. Sure, she felt bad, but a schizophrenic teenage girl's gotta do what a schizophrenic teenage girl's gotta do. But what she hadn't planned was an ambush attack from a tall officer that jumped in front of her and forced her to the ground.
Fuck, Hidan wasn't going to be happy when the police called.