Title: Lady Fu's Fortune Telling
Category: Cartoons ยป Avatar: Last Airbender
Author: Lady Cleo
Language: English, Rating: Rated: T
Genre: Humor/Romance

Not my world- because I don't want a world where people fall in love with their mother figures. I will, however, gladly attempt to fix other people's world to suit my view. On that note- you've been warned - Taang and Zutara. Forgive any errors, as I will probably come back and edit after a few days anyway.


The smell of the elements pervaded the room, filled every nook and cranny, overwhelming both Katara's and Toph's sense of smell. Strange knick knacks lined the many shelves along the wall as a warm fire toasted the air. "Egh-" Toph choked out, fanning the air away from her nose. "Where have you taken me Katara? It better not be some-"

"Relax, it's just an elemental fortuneteller. I thought it might be fun to have our fortunes read." The water bender gently forced the younger girl to her knees in front of the fire pit. "I had this done once in the earth Kingdom. What harm is there in seeing our possible futures?"

Toph gagged on the air again, "Well, it better be fast, the smell in here could kill a small rodent. Thank the spirits we didn't bring Twinkle Toes, he might have asphyxiated on-" The curtains behind the fire pit parted, admitting a small aged woman with enough wrinkles to scare away small children. Toph frowned, lowering her voice as she leaned towards Katara's, "Keep your eye on this one, Sugar Queen, she's got some freaky vibrations."

"Welcome, girls, to Lady Fu's," the elderly woman crackled, then hacked up a cough, inciting a raised eyebrow from both the girls. "I'm fine thank you, dears." Katara shut her gaping mouth quickly. Dropping down to her knees, the old woman pushed up her long red sleeves and sent a spark into the fire. "I am Lady Fu and from my infinite depths of wisdom I can see into the future-" Toph snorted, but the old woman ignored it and continued, "for ALL is bound together by the elements. Air, Earth, Water, and Fire will tell all you seek to know."

"First - you-" a wrinkled finger shot towards Katara. "I see you are immersed in the spirit of Water." Grabbing a bag she tossed it with a flourish onto the fire. The flames shot up for a second, prompting Katara to tug Toph away from the leaping swirls of fire. "Ahh- yes, I see."

"What? What do you see?" Katara peered closely into the fire pit looking for a sign or symbol. "Is it good? I already know I'm going to marry a powerful bender, but some details might help paint a better picture."

The woman chuckled, "I can only tell what the elementals say, my dear, gaze into the fire with me and they will give you a clear picture- so long as you listen, and listen well. First Air: Yes I see, you have been at peace with the Air for sometime-" Lady Fu's face suddenly scrunched together into an un-pleasant frown. "But be warned, Air cannot stir the depths of the water, only the surface. Too much Air makes waves, these waves will not bring you joy, but tear apart all that you hold dear. Steer clear of seeking out Air, my child, it will bring only turmoil among the seas and create unrest in your soul."

"Truth, total truth." Toph piped up excitedly. "Yeah, totally steer clear of the Air, Katara."

The old woman cracked a smile. "Now, Earth. You and Earth are bound by friendship. Nurture this relationship; it will bring you great harmony in the future."

"That figures." Toph smirked, crossing her arms across her chest.

"Ah, but Fire remains." The woman once again peered into flames. "Ah yes, Fire bodes well for you my dear." A sly wink was shot off towards Katara. "Yes, I see. Sometimes Fire and Water bring destruction and unrest, but here I see that Fire will certainly mix well with your Water. Seek it out, my dear, seek it out, and you will find your boiling point."

"Boiling point?" The prospect did not seem to excite the waterbender.

"Mhh, yes, what woman does not desire to meet her boiling point? Oh my dear, you are in for some wicked fun with this spark of a flame. Perhaps you might wish to remain in the Fire Nation, I know of a wonderful deal on fireproof sheets." Another sly wink and a nod of the woman's head followed as the hag picked up a small stick and gently stirred the fire. "My, my, my, yes I see you will meet it. And from the ensuring steam will rise two, both a mighty spark and a healing raindrop."

"Alright sweetness, I didn't know you had it in you. You crazy furnace you."

"Wait," the woman frowned, stirring the cinders, "What's this I see,-yes, it's the royal sign. You are of royal linage?" The old woman knocked around the cinders some more and glazed up quizzically at Katara- Katara shook her head no. "Ahh, must be my mistake." With a flick of the stick she cast the sign off. "The future bodes well for you, child- wait what's this- damn, out Air, out." Thwacking the flames with the stick, the woman growled then abruptly paused for a second, "Ahh yes I see. Follow the heart child, it is in your element. Do not let the pressure of others cast you into the Air, for all you will find is misfortune and unease in your soul."

"Defiantly." Toph grinned in agreement. "Air bad, Katara, air bad."

Katara huffed in response, crossing her arms and turning her head away from the pair, "Alright, I get it, steer clear of Air, stick to Fire. Though breathing might be a problem there."

The old woman nodded her head in satisfaction before raking away the cinders of the fire and picking up the second bag. With a flourish similar to the first she tossed the bag onto the fire, the flames darted up again, licking the air with a violent flare of energy. "You," she directed her attention to Toph, "are immersed in Earth."

"Yeah, yeah, I got that. Now tell me if I'm the greatest earthbender in the world. Because if I'm not, I've got some heads to pound. Also, if you can give me names and locations that would be great."

The old woman frowned, "I can tell you what the elements say my child, and no more. Now gaze into the fire and listen well."

"Nope."

"Pardon?"

"Blind, so no gazing on my part Lady, feel free to tell me what they're saying since the ears are perfectly good."

The woman clucked her tongue against her cheek and turned her attention to the fire. "Very well. What's this?" She blinked and pinched the bridge of the nose before peeking back into the flames. "Oh my dear- there are so many."

"Damn it." Toph cursed, "I thought I had this whole earthbender thing down. Alright let me have it, how many are better? Katara you better get a pen out and start writing down the-"

"No, no my dear. You are quite secure in your element, only I have never seen one in such harmony with all the elements." Picking up her stick, she began to rapidly rake through the cinders, her brows furrowing as she let out tiny gasps of amazement. "I have never seen such- I cannot tell where to start."

"Start with Water." Katara piped up eagerly, elbowing Toph gently in the ribs. "How's her relationship with Water?"

"Water is, well, she is at peace with Water in a friendly way. But, there is another sign of the Water that speaks of the rain. It nourishes Earth as a love and brings, oh my, quite a bit of life. When mixed with a breeze it creates growth in some places and refreshes that which has already grown-"

"Alright," Katara interrupted, "We get the idea, just like Fire's going to boil me, Water will bring her new life. " ("Quite a bit of life dear.") "Okay what about Fire. Fire generally represents emotions, right?"

"Correct, child." Staring back into the depths of the flames, the elder woman gave a twirl of her stick and let a quick snort out of her lips. "Yes, there will be much warmth with your Fire. Fire can ravage Earth, but it is through the ravage that more growth comes and sparks warmth in the cold." The elderly woman winked at Toph, then remembering that the girl could not see the action, chuckled to herself. "And we all need a good ravaging once in a while, dear. Fire stirs passion when mixed with her Air and speaks of-"

"So Air's her bad element? Katara's questioned impatiently.

Toph shot a wicked glare at the other girl, "Hey, let the woman finish, I want to hear how I can be ravaged in a positive light. We already had to listen to your boiling water, let me have my share of the flame."

Lady Fu clucked her tongue again drawing the girls' attention back. "You do not have bad elements, my dear."

"Yes she does," Toph argued back, "She's got to stay away from Air, right, she can't interfere with Air. She needs to leave that for use more elementally friendly figures."

"Perhaps I did not make myself clear." The woman began, invoking an exasperated sigh from the Toph's lips and followed by a glare full heartedly turned in her direction, almost as if willing the crone to stop talking. It appeared to have no effect on the fortuneteller. "I merely stated that your friend should avoid romantic entanglements with Air." Turing to Katara she added, "Do not try and spark a storm with Air my child, you will find that in Fire. Air will remain a loyal friend and brother to Water so long as more is not sought."

Toph quietly huffed, before turning to shake her fingers in Katara's direction. "Alright, as long as she understands to steer clear of Air." Katara rolled her eyes before motioning for the old woman to continue with Toph's fortune.

"Last is the element of Air itself. You will find your true harmony with Air, as you will ground the Air and guide it through the world. I seem much good will come if Air remains with Earth. A strong and ancient bond exists between your Earth and Air, it has set you free, my dear."

"That makes sense," Toph agreed with an emphatic nod to her statement.

Katara's face scrunched in confusion, "It does?"

"Air is the element which you will thrive in and - good sprits, what on earth!"

"What is it? Am I royal like Katara?"

"No dear, but it seems to me as though when combined with the Air element, your Earth produces quiet a few breezes. Let's see- that's one, two, three, ah there's another, four, five- too many to count. My dear, what are you trying to do, repopulate a nation?"

Toph's smile spread out into a Cheshire grin as she pumped a fist into the air. "Alright, not only am I the greatest earthbender in the word but I get a whole bunch of breezes, score! Pay the lady Katara, she's done well in my book."

A small grumble slipped past the waterbender's lip as she reached into her pocket and produced the silver coins needed. The two girls nodded their thanks and slipped back out in the fresh air. "Well, that was nowhere near as satisfying as Lady Wu's prediction. In fact, I'd say we've just been had."

"What are you talking about? That women's a genius, every word she spoke was the absolute truth."

Katara shook her head at the other girl and turned to make their way back to palace. "Not a word that came out of her mouth made any sense to me."

"Think about it, Sugar Queen, it made perfect sense."

"It did?"

"Sure." Toph lifted her hands and rested them on her head as they milled their way slowly back to the palace. "Sparky's Fire, he's going ditch that psycho depressed girl and make some flames with his favorite waterbender. You'll have two kids and rule the Fire Nation with dignity."

"Really?" The smirk settled across Katara's face easily as she gazed down at her smaller friend. "You seem to be forgetting a lot of things. For starters I think that would crush poor Aang-"

"Hey," An accusing finger shot out to poke Katara in the side. "The Lady said to stay away from romantic entanglements with Air. You don't want a life of unrest and turmoil, now do you?" Katara shook her head no in response, prompting the small earthbender to poke her once more, "Then you just remember what the nice lady said."

Katara pushed Toph's finger away. "Okay, even if nothing happens with Aang, there are no sparks between Fire Lord Zuko and -"

"And they call me the blind one."

"Toph, you're taking this a little far." Katara pulled to a stop beside a vendor selling hair pieces, reaching out to finger a red beaded pin. "Besides, I'm sure I can think of a hundred other things that would get in the way of any 'romantic entanglement-" Katara broke off as she caught a glimpse of her red hued cheeks in the man's mirror. Why on earth was she blushing? Glancing quickly away, the waterbender sent a thankful prayer to the spirits that the earthbender could not see the crimson cheeks. Turning away from the table she started back to the palace at a quicker pace and attempted to redirect the conversation. "Alright, if I'm destined to be the Fire Lady, are you destined to love three different masters?"

"Now hold it right there Sweetness, she didn't say anything about three different masters. The nice lady said I was in harmony with all the elements. Last I checked there's only one man - well, boy- that's capable of mastering all elements."

Katara stopped in her tracks and turned to look at her younger friend, "What, you mean-"

A smug grin settled across Toph's face, "I think it's about time Twinkle Toes got a new name; Monk-lover, Hunk of a Monk, Sugar Monk. So many choices." Despite the fact that she was blind, Toph knew the waterbender was wide-eyed and catching flies in her mouth. "I wonder if it's too soon to start making those Air babies. Got quite a quota to fill there."