A/N: Yes, I know I should be updating Couples Therapy, but I was just so sad after Sunday's episode, and this little bit wouldn't let me alone. It's not going to be a one-shot, so I hope that you can wait patiently for updates. Since Couples Therapy and Invoking Kismet are my priorities.
This takes place in the scene between Eric and Sookie. Some of the dialogue is the same, some is not. What is from the dialogue is coming from my very fallible memory, so if it's not exactly right, please don't shoot me.
Thanks to my beta Krismom, she is the icing on my cake. Love her. Big hugs to SMFogleman for pre-reading. She is full of awesome.
Disclaimer: I don't own them. If I did the TB season wouldn't have gone the way it did.
"Now here's the truth, there are forces beyond even my control. If I meet my true death without having at least kissed you, Sookie Stackhouse, it will be my biggest regret."
I wished that I could say I wasn't affected by Eric's depressed mood or by his confession, but that wasn't the case. My heart fluttered against my ribcage, and I was having difficulty taking my next breath.
I guessed having his blood affected a lot more than my dreams, because I could feel the gloominess coming off of him in waves. It was practically its own entity in his cluttered office. I hated to see him like this, unsure, without his usually annoying confidence. It wasn't until that very moment that the rest of the meaning behind his words finally set in.
"Why does it feel like you're saying goodbye to me?" I asked, not really sure that I wanted the real answer. But I knew I needed it. If I could save him...
"Because I am," Eric replied in a defeated whisper, and I felt my heart sink.
I'd hardly had the chance to take a breath before his large hands gripped my head, his mouth slanting over mine, coercing a response from me. I pushed and hit at his chest, trying in vain to escape his grasp, but he pulled me back.
My mouth opened to argue- I couldn't believe this was happening- and Eric's cool tongue slipped past my lips. I moaned at the sudden contact. His taste, his passion, the smell of him surrounding me, it was all so much. Too much.
I couldn't help it, my body responded, and I was holding onto him for dear life. My hands were in his hair, gripping his shoulders, pressing my body closer to his. Boy, oh boy, could Eric kiss. His lips matched the passion in his words. He was kissing me as if he had been saving this very kiss for my very lips for a thousand years.
No, no, no! This couldn't be happening. Bill? What about Bill? Why was it I had came here in the first place? I couldn't remember. It was only Eric, and his lips and his tongue, and my body molding against his as if it were a missing piece.
I forced him back with everything I had, missing his touch just as quickly. "Okay, I get it. I'm irresistible and intoxicating. Keeping things from me doesn't exactly help your cause." I had to take a breath and try to gather my wits, "Tell me why I shouldn't trust Bill."
Eric gave me a look, full of confusion and disappointment. Clearly he wasn't expecting me to stop, and clearly he was just as affected by the kiss as I was. Which shouldn't have brought me as much satisfaction as it did. One more kiss wouldn't hurt, would it?
Before he could answer and before I could make another mistake, Pam opened the door. "Blah, blah Vampire emergency, blah."
I stiffened, taking a step back, and looking anywhere except for at Eric. Good god, my heart was beating furiously in my chest, and I was panting, breathless.
Eric stood stiffly for a moment, obviously warring with himself over something. Did he want to kiss me again as much as I wanted to kiss him? Ugh, that's SO not helping Sookie Stackhouse. He gave me an indiscernible look before fleeing the room. It was so sudden, it took me a moment to register the fact that he had locked me in.
One hell of a kisser, but a bastard.
I could still feel his lips on mine, taste his tongue on mine. I could still feel the length of his body against mine, the way his total essence seemed to surround me. Jesus, my mind was blown, that was the only way to describe the feelings that were overwhelming me.
I sat down in a huff, crossing my arms, and forcing myself not to think about Eric, or his stupid talented mouth. It was only the blood. That had to be it. I wouldn't have responded as such otherwise. He was manipulative, and insensitive, and selfish. And I couldn't trust him.
But something tugging at my gut was telling me otherwise. Dammit! I used to be able to trust my gut. I used to be able to tell if someone was lying to me. I was used to being able to know if I was being played or deceived by people due to the fact that I could read their minds. But that was all before vampires and their unreadable thoughts and self-serving ways had come into my life.
I stood up and paced. Sitting down with my legs bouncing like I was hyped up on caffeine wasn't helping my thoughts. It certainly wasn't giving me any more answers. And all this doubt and insecurity was weighing me down.
I paced and paced and paced, stopping only to occasionally pick up some random object in Eric's office that caught my eye. He was quite the collector himself. There were items scattered throughout the room that seemed to be from all over the world, and some of them very old.
I lifted a very old, very worn book, intent on inspecting it further. But as soon as I removed it from the shelf, I revealed what was hidden behind it, and had to keep the book from slipping from my hand.
It was a picture. Of me! And Eric! It was the first night I had met the intimidating and beautiful vampire. He was sitting on his god-awful throne, and I was beside him. I hadn't known I was being photographed that night. But perhaps it was from the surveillance cameras throughout the building. I was smiling that goofy nervous smile and recognized it with a cringe. Eric was looking at me with such a strange expression I couldn't decipher. Adoration? Curiosity? Hunger?
I never could tell with vampires. They were all so good at hiding things from me. What's more is why in the world did Eric have a picture of me?
Maybe it would be best if I just cut them all out of my life completely. Maybe that would get rid of these conflicting emotions and desires warring within my own body and mind. But did I want to? Did I want to be rid of every supernatural being in my life? Because that was what it would take. It wasn't something I think I was prepared for just yet, no matter how appealing a semi-normal life was sounding right then.
I sighed heavily, placing the book back on the shelf and began wearing a hole in the floor once again. What was taking Eric so long? Bill would be angry, and worried and … ugh! I could just call him, there was a phone right there on the desk.
I could just pick it up and dial the number and tell him... tell him, what? That I was fine? That I was trying to figure out why I shouldn't trust him by going to the one vampire in the world he'd never get along with, Eric? I could just make something up. But I couldn't seem to convince myself to do anything. Why? Why couldn't I call Bill? I still love him, right?
Shit! I didn't know, I just didn't KNOW anything anymore. And it was disconcerting and annoying as hell I hated feeling blind and unsure. But most of all, I hated that I felt I was being deceived by the one person in the world I had given myself wholly to.
My hands were a shaky, sweaty mess, and I had all but gnawed the tips off my fingers when Eric finally opened up the door, striding in like he owned the place. Well, he did, but still. He always owned whatever space he was in, and it made me feel so unimportant, invisible.
"Where have you been?"
"I needed to think," he answered without looking at me.
"Well, you didn't have to lock me in here like an animal. I still need answers. I wasn't going anywhere until I got them." I said stepping towards him. I wasn't going to let him intimidate me. Well, at least I wasn't going to show it anyway.
"Would you trust me if I asked you to?" Eric said, still looking at the floor. "If there was a way I could still save your life as well as my own, could you trust me?"
"What's going on, Eric?"
"Would you..." he growled and then paused, lowering his voice, "trust me?"
His voice was so pleading, so painful that I really wanted to say yes. I really did, but the words wouldn't come. I was frightened beyond speaking. Frightened for my life, for Bill's, for Eric's. There was something he wasn't telling me.
Eric stepped closer, finally looking at me then, and I gave a slight nod. It was all I was capable of. I was probably making the biggest mistake of my life, but something told me Eric was going to do what he was going to do anyway, whether I agreed to it or not. I may not have been the brightest star in the sky, but I wasn't stupid. I knew things were serious. Especially since Eric was so insistent, so... scared.
The tension seemed to leave his towering body with his next breath, and I found myself relaxing as he did. I knew I was tense, but when Eric visibly relaxed, it was like I was weightless, floating. I almost smiled.
"Come with me," Eric demanded, holding his hand out for me.
I took it, albeit hesitantly, as he dragged me from his office and towards the basement. "Where are we going?"
"I need you to stay here and not ask questions." Eric responded, not really answering my question.
"You're not going to lock me in there," I said defiantly, dragging my feet. He was. Eric was totally going to lock me in his basement. "Eric, don't do this. You can't leave me here." I hated that I sounded so desperate, but hell, he was going to lock me up.
"I asked you to trust me, you said you would. Now, I need you to keep your word." God, that look in his eyes nearly brought me to my knees. I loathed his blood being in my body more in that moment than I ever had. He shouldn't be able to break me with one look. He shouldn't be able to tear down my walls with one fleeting glance.
"Don't make me regret this, Eric," I said through my teeth. I was going for intimidating and serious, but I feared that I came off more as the scared little kitten quivering in the corner. I know I sure felt like one.
"Don't make me regret this," he said.
The low growl rumbling in his chest was the only warning I got before his mouth was on mine. I didn't even try to fight it that time. I simply melted in his arms, welcoming his seeking tongue with an open mouth. Oh god, he tasted like heaven, and like hell. Like the most decadent dessert in the entire world. It was sinful, and his lips were quickly becoming my most favorite sin.
And then it was over. Eric pulled back, and I stumbled forward with the momentum of our kiss. My mouth was open enough to catch flies, but I couldn't bring myself to care. Eric had kissed the brains right out of my head. I may as well have been a puddle of staked vampire goo on the concrete floor. Coherent thought was out the window right then.
The only thing I could think about was when I'd get to kiss him again. And again.
Eric took a hesitant step back, and then another, his eyes held the same longing that I feared mine did. But with my next breath and his vampire speed, he was gone, and I slumped to the floor with my fingers covering my swollen lips. The clicking of the lock echoed in the large concrete room, but the fact that I was locked in was the furthest thing from my mind.
Why hadn't it ever felt like this when kissing Bill?
A/N: I do hope that you enjoyed the changes I made. Please bear with me and the slow updates, but I promise this story will be finished. Thanks so very much for taking the time to read it.
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