As always the normal I am not SM I do not own Twilight or its characters. I just want to pump them together hard and fast and see who falls apart.
As I picked myself up from the ruins of my very old own once priceless book collection my brain cleared instantly. I took in the sight of my son standing protectively in front of Bella his low growls warning me off fiercely.
Behind him the siren sat still, her eyes now wet with unshed tears her lips swollen behind the hand covering her gasp. She looked at me with utter fear in her eyes. I had scared her, my shame washed over me as another hiss from Edward brought me back to reality. I looked at him unsure what to say to defuse the situation.
We could hash this out after Bella went home, I had put her through enough she didn't need to be witness to the struggle that was sure to come once Edward understood the gravity of the situation. His eyes snapped to mine, of course he was reading my mind he knew what I wanted, and I wanted Bella.
Hurt washed across his face, bringing my shame to the front again. Guilt stung my core. I had hurt my son, scared Bella, and ultimately shamed my family. Only instead of the shame I felt the barest of a moment ago, I wasn't sorry. If I burnt in hell for all eternity the flames would never be hotter than those that consumed me while I had kissed those supple pink lips and felt her tongue meet my own in return.
To know that she had whimpered in pleasure at the feel of my kiss. Even faced with the destruction my actions caused I wanted more of her I wanted to taste her again to smell her desire as I did more than simply kiss those lips.
"AHH!" Edward's roar was the only warning I had as I was slammed into the wall with his hands at my throat. My head hit the wall cracking the plaster he had hit me with the force of his anger at my betrayal. At the thoughts I couldn't stop him from hearing even now. The rage being fueled further at that fact. His fist crashed into my face, I deserved that hit so I let it come. Its connection cracking the plaster further as well as my own porcelain skin.
When I returned from my fantasy world, I was shocked to find Edward had thrown Carlisle across the room. When he stood I stared at him so shocked I was frozen still. My fingers moved slowly to touch my lips trying to somehow lock this lingering kiss there forever.
I came out of that thought at another crash this time to find Edward holding Carlisle against the wall slamming his fist into his fathers face with a clash and a roar. I tried to slid off the desk to my feet thinking to stop the fight. Only as I came upright off the desk I fell to my knees with a soft gasp and a thud. Ugh, clumsy as ever of course. The weakness in my legs surely due from the earth shattering kiss I had shared with Carlisle. Oh God I had kissed Carlisle…
Edward was at my side in a nanosecond. Helping me to my wobbly legs and holding me as I found my footing. My Edward always there for me to lean on. The unshed tears rushed forth. What had I done? Oh Edward I am so sorry. The words a thought nothing more as I looked past him to Carlisle who stood a foot from the wall now as if he had been heading for me when I fell.
I spoke his name on a breathless whisper softer on my tongue than anything other than his kiss had been. He looked at me his eyes smoldering instantly going from the rich amber brown to a dark black intensity. No, he couldn't possibly be wanting to.. I shook off that thought as Edward growled again this time instantly coming to stand between me and Carlisle.
"How long?" Edward roared at Carlisle and then bared his teeth hissing at whatever silent response he had received. "How long what?" I asked confused hating when he did this. I was here I had kissed his father this was my fault, yet he ignored me as nothing more than an irritating fly on the wall.
"How Long What?" I roared this time bringing Edwards head snapping around to face me. His eyes were black as well. That explained it then the dark eyes in them both a point of anger at me. "What were you thinking? Damn it never have I wanted to know your mind more than I do now. Tell me he forced you. Tell me you didn't kiss him back as he thinks. Tell me anything, make me believe in you!" Edward ended his rant gripping my shoulders in his strong hands squeezing hard shaking me. I tried to stop the gasp but it got loose. It wasn't the pain in his hold that made me gasp instead it was the shock that I would have to own up to what I had been trying to ignore.
A low growl vibrated across the room to me, causing my stomach to flip flop as if I was on a roller coaster. My eyes flicked to Carlisle who was moving towards me anger in his ebony eyes. Edward released his hold on me placing me firmly behind himself shielding me from the man who had rocked the foundation my world has been built upon.
Edward and Carlisle stared at each other neither wanting to make the move that could end their many years together finally. Edward knew, or at least he suspected that I had feelings for Carlisle. I had fought the attraction playing it off as nothing more than being attracted to him purely due to his vampire sexuality. Over and over I had convinced myself I was simply in awe of Carlisle that I truly still loved Edward.
I would lay awake at night and berate myself for the thoughts I had for my boyfriends father. How could I want him over my perfect Edward? "Do you love her?" His words tearing me again back to the reality of the moment. Then he turned to me even more stiff in his movements. "Do you have feelings for him Bella?" He didn't dare touch me as he asked those words.
"I.. I don't.. I.. He loves Esme.. I couldn't.." I tired to quench the insane urge to scream at the top of my lungs YES. Just say yes, just do it, just admit you don't just lust for him say it aloud you love him you fool. I stammered and the tears ran fresh. Edward wiped the tears away before closing that door soundly. "Your confused, you need to go home get some rest I will handle what he tried to do to you I promise."
His words sounded so cold that I shivered. "No Edward he didn't, it was a…. misunderstanding." I tried to stop this train wreck in its tracks only to be slammed into by the force of the impact. Edward was pulling me roughly from the room. I followed numbly as soon as I was out in the hallway I was chilled to the bone colder than I had ever been cold and hollow empty though and through to my core. I followed him on autopilot. My mind drifting back over the many times I had denied my feelings for the man I left behind me now.
The first day when Edward had saved me from Tyler's van. That was the day I had known something was truly different about Edward Cullen, and I was determined to find out what. I had been sitting in the hospital listening embarrassed as Charlie ripped into poor Tyler for his almost murder of the police chief's daughter.
A smell had caught my attention, it smelled like fresh baked cookies, night, and calm. I looked up struck dumb by the unearthly beauty of the man before me. Then I was introduced to none other than Carlisle Cullen. I knew he was Edward's adopted father and tried to distract my brain from his body by concentrating on what he might know about Edward's strange abilities.
I dropped little hints to him about how fast Edward has reached me during the accident. All the while wanting nothing more than to reach out in front of my father and anyone who stood nearby and touch this blonde Adonis's hair and find it as silky to the touch as it looked.
The next time fate tempted my mortal soul came to me when Edward decided to have me over to officially meet his family as a couple. At this point I had fallen head over heals for Edward completely overwhelmed that this immortal teenager this superhuman being wanted me. I was sure I would be safe from the tormenting lust I had felt when I first met his father now that I was in love.
Only that was the stab that hurt the most, I wasn't immune not even a little. To stand in that kitchen and see Carlisle cooking at the stove. His strong stature his grace his poise seeing him do something so human I couldn't stop the flash of me standing next to him cooking breakfast together. Me wearing his button up shirt while he stood barefoot beside me in those black slacks.
The next nail in my coffin came when the Cullen's invited me to the family baseball game. I thought I was prepared, I was sure I could just get through the day. I knew the lust would come. I didn't however know that I would be the umpire for the game. That I would be crouched low behind Esme as Carlisle came up to bat. His tight ass in that form fitting uniform the way his body moved completely revealed to my inspection.
It was then that I knew I was a horrible person. Here I was with a wonderful boyfriend gawking at this sexy man wanting him more than the air I breathed. While that mans wife stood next to me. I could almost feel the red S being scored into my flesh. This new side of Carlisle this playful fun loving side that was the part of him I yearned for the most.
He then floored me anew when he stood up against the nomads who came into the clearing. He stood proud to protect me against James's as a part of his family. Over and over this man had broken down my walls that I built to hide from him. When I was attacked and Carlisle knelt next to me I allowed him in that moment to break part of Edward's hold on my heart.
As he told Edward to allow the venom to change me, I shattered slightly to hear Edward's horrified denial. I knew I would never be with Edward forever. That he didn't want me as one of them. That he would never make me his forever. Then when Carlisle had to push him into draining the venom from my blood in order to let me live, I was angry that it even required thinking about.
It was that one instant that caused my feelings to change. To make me see my perfect Edward in a whole new light. I loved him still to this very day, but I loved him with reservations now. I no longer wholeheartedly blindly followed him around like a mindless pup. Instead I was aware of his faults of his possessive controlling nature. I knew he meant to protect me yet he only succeeded in smothering me, and the more I gasped for air the more the flame of my love for him flickered and dimmed suffocating as well.
Reveiw please. I need feedback. What do you think? What do you hope happens? FYI: This story is not being pumped out fast I have a notebook full of already written pages I am editing and typing up so if a few chapters come at once thats why. Thank you all for the feedback so far. Love, Tisa.